For the first time in a long time, Eli slept past sunrise. By the time he was finally awake, sunlight shone through the cracks in his curtains, laying rays of sun across the room. The room was hardly unkempt, but the dust suspended was apparent with the light at that angle. As his awareness returned, so did the aches and pains from every blow he withstood the day before. Then, he remembered. Jarovi’s face, beaten in with the back of Eli’s fists, eyes wide with shock, yet empty at the same time. Flashes of bright red blood splattering against his face. The warm invitation of Jarovi’s blood on his face was such a contrast to the dark red blood pouring out of the wound in his opponent's neck. His heart slammed against his chest and yanked him out of the abyss. He shook it off. He had to face the day. A good lord always had to tackle life with a code of integrity, and that meant that he had to face the consequences of his actions. Father had droned on and on about how hard their society would collapse without a sense of integrity. So, he went downstairs to be a good noble boy.

There was hardly anything Mary could think to say to Eli that would have been productive, so she remained quiet, lest she let the emotions get the best of her and get into another argument with Jacob. It was best to let the man do what he thought was best. When she saw Eli struggling to eat his breakfast in the morning, her heart grew heavy. That feeling sizzled off the way drizzle evaporated from the heat of a midsummer day. No. She would not waste her time pitying her son, for he was not the one who arranged for the savage to train him. No, she thought. Sympathy for the innocent was a complete waste of time. She did not want to feed that emotion, because she would become sad, and when Mary was sad, she was unproductive. Being an unproductive citizen and Lady of nobility was inexcusable. Another thought boiled in the back of her mind, but she tried to quell it by pushing it beyond the limit of forethought. But it came in like a hot flash of lightning, and her fleeting sympathy struck a nerve and a seething hatred for Jarovi the savage blossomed. How dare he do this to my son. The King should kill them all, she thought. They are a leech to this land, and a burden to society. I wish they’d burn the savages one by one. The glass she was washing suddenly shattered under the pressure of her grip, and the dishwater was flooded with a red cloud of blood.

“Mary, oh my God!” Jacob cried out as he saw the rush of blood drip from her hands. She held her hand up, and it seeped down her arm and began to dribble from her elbow. Eli watched with an observed silence. Jacob grabbed linens to wrap the wound, and questioned, “What happened?”

“I-I don’t know, I was just deep in thought, and stressed, and-”

“Sh Sh, it’s okay, you need to sit down. Do you feel dizzy?”

“No, No, I’m fine Jac-” she was cut short by a stumble, and Jacob reflexively grabbed her arm. His eyes met Eli’s. No emotion, Jacob thought to himself. He sensed a thread of worry in his own mind. He took Mary’s arm and guided her to the den. He cleaned up the small cut and wrapped it in fabric.

“What happened?”

“I’m not sure, my mind was elsewhere,” Mary said.

“Let me get you some water, you need to sit down for a moment.”

Jacob kissed her on the forehead and met Eli in the kitchen. Eli was picking up shards of glass from the sink, avoiding eye contact. “Are you ready?”

“Yes, Father. My bags are packed for a week.” He looked up to Jacob. Jacob met his gaze and said, “It really is going to help you. Your Uncle Peter has lived a very productive life despite his…” Jacobs' voice trailed off.

“His what?” Eli asked. “His handicap?”

“That’s not-”

“I know what you-”

“Don’t interrupt me!” Jacobs' voice boomed.

Silence paused the tension for just a moment, then Eli said, in a neutral tone, “You weren’t there yesterday.”

Jacob’s face looked baffled. “Son!” he pleaded, “I don’t know what happened, but I know the signs when I see them. Your mother and I want what is best for you, we are not doing this as a punishment.”

Eli considered that for a moment. He knew his parents were right, but he just didn’t want to have to spend a week with his father’s cousin. He had only met the man one time before, and it made him anxious when he thought about having to wake up to a strange house, with strange foods and smells, and bathroom. It was uncomfortable to imagine it. “I want to stay home.” Eli said quietly, holding back his tears.

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Jacob breathed deep. He had to remind himself that Eli was still just a little boy. But if they couldn’t nip this in the bud now, their family would be in shambles by the time there was anything remotely close to a resolution. It might hurt now, but in the big picture, it is the correct decision. He could not give in to his emotion on this because the emotional decision was too irrational in this situation. Cold logic was what needed to prevail.

“I know you do, Eli,” said Jacob. “There’s a time in every man’s life that he must do what he does not want to do. This is one of the times, Eli.”

Jacob’s eyes scanned over every inch of his son’s face. Eli struggled to maintain eye contact. But Jacob could see the wheels turning, and after what felt like a very long and tense moment, Eli took a deep breath and accepted his circumstance. Jacob felt his son’s shoulders relax, and patted him on the back.

* * *

It took almost the entire day to travel to Peter’s house, and Eli was relieved when he saw the Steelcrest stronghold, because his Uncle’s Mill was less than an hour from there. The hold always looked so massive to Eli. He thought about all the manpower it must have taken to build such a monument. His mind played through scenarios of battles he had learned about from his History lessons. He imagined a sea of enemies, adorned with red cloaks, attempting to penetrate the fortress, but the feat looked impossible to do, even now. And that was 3 generations ago.

“Filled with nothing but retired soldiers and beggars now. Damn shame,” said Jacob. He looked beyond the walls into the atmosphere as he contemplated the future this land would hold for his son, when he came of age to be a lord. Eli was smart, no doubt, but if he couldn’t keep his emotions in check, the king would never grant him the rights to Jacob’s land. Jacob knew the only way their family name would live on, was if Eli took Lordship, and had children of his own. Well, not just any child. He needs to have a son who is capable of passing the assessment. When he thought of his land being taken by the kingdom and auctioned off to some half-witted “war hero”, he internally cringed. He did not like to dwell on that thought. He decided to continue to focus his attention on the solution.

Peter was a large man, with a large voice. Eli jumped when he was first greeted by a booming, but friendly voice as he stepped out of the carriage. “Eli!” he said. “What a surprise to see you here, I’m so glad you guys made it in time for supper.” He looked Eli in the eye, and Eli knew he sensed a seriousness in his look when Peter continued, “You’re going to need plenty of energy for tomorrow.”

Peter led Eli and his father into the magnificent manor. His body laguage was as big as his voice as he extended his arms out and used exaggerated hand gestures at every point he made. As he led the father and son upstairs he lifted his fat finger to his hushed lips and we walked softly past a shit door. The voice of Eli's aunt softly speaking had the cadence of reading aloud. Probably to his cousin Tinnie, Eli figured.

Eli's other used to read to him when he was young, but it was never fictional fairytales. It was all about lordship, tending cattle, and upkeep of a manor. He thought it silly to read fairy tales to children. All that did was rent space in their mind which could be better utilized in training of some sort.

Once Peter passed what he judged a fair enough distance, he resumed his heavy footed march though the manor going on and on about the changes to the property since we last visited. Eli followed his father and Uncle without much interest in the words they were saying, but more focusing on the way they interacted. His father was very reserved and rigid, and his uncle, fluid and full of expression. He couldn't quite put nail what he was feeling, but he felt a slight guilt towards his attraction towards his uncle's personality. He secretly envied the freedom of movements and  expressions his uncle seemed to portray effortlessly. In a snap reaction to this feeling, he reverted to seeing this as a weakness. Being a man meant being in control of your emotions, and giving away too much expression took away from your focus on the situation. As they reached the study, the two men sat in rich colored leather chairs with arm rests so big, they made even Peter look like a schoolboy sitting in his fathers chair. His father looked almost comically small in the chair. Eli found a small stool near a book shelf and perused the various writings while his elders continued their conversation.

Jacob and Peter caught up a bit on their current affairs, mostly talking about production rates, yield percentages, and future market predictions for next season’s harvest. Eli paid little attention to that conversation, and studied his new environment. Eli liked the way everything had a place, and there was no clutter at all. He marvelled at the art displayed around the house. They weren’t like the art he was used to seeing. Normal art, he thought, the paintings with subjects comprised of beautiful scenery or some sort of event. These paintings were brightly colored patterns that seemed to go on forever. They didn’t seem to represent anything, but he couldn’t tear his attention from them. They were fascinating.Then a tinge of guilt ripped him from his trance.

Jacob and Peter drained the remaining whiskey in their glasses, and stood up. Eli had been so caught up in his thoughts, that he barely caught the intent of goodbyes the men shared. "Wait, aren't you going to stay the night? You can't travel all the way home at this hour!" Eli asked.

“I’m not going home tonight, Eli. I have a business meeting with the Commander at Steelcrest in the morning. I've got a chamber in the Keep for the night so I can make the meeting at dawn. But don't worry about me, son. Focus on your task at hand." He stopped and gave Eli a look up and down. "Mind your uncle.” He flashed Eli a wink, and was out the door in one swift movement.

Eli felt a slight tugging at his heart, as if there was something unsaid, but he couldn't place his finger on it. He shrugged it off and followed his uncle to his guest quarters. "We are leaving before sun up tomorrow, so I suggest you get to bed pretty early. Being an old man myself, I am not going to waste another minute!" He said with a warm smile. Eli thanked him as Peter shut the door behind him.

That night Eli could hardly sleep. He had too much on his mind, and, not to mention, his uncles manor was much closer to civilization than home. The clops of hooves beating the cobble path echoed and meandered within his room. Occasional commands from drivers to their horses or stablemen hung in the air like a thick fog. He tried not to focus on his problem, but it was nigh impossible. It was hard for him to acknowledge that he had killed Jarovi in a fit of rage. After all, he thought, I don't even remember doing it. That was not me. Thoughts of that foul word slammed into his thoughts like a wave crashing into a cliff. He winced, and pushed that thought aside. That was not me. All I need to do, is focus on getting rid of whatever this ailment is, and then I can turn my attention towards my assessment for lordship. And that thought was apparently comforting enough that he was able to drift to sleep.