Despite all the unfortunate events that happen to me, I never consider my life a tragedy. Yea, my parents dying after I was born can be considered a tragic event, but I never got the chance to know them, so I see no point in crying over people I never knew. Being forced to fight in a war at an incredibly young age is also kind of mess up, I do agree there, but at least they fed me and gave me a weapon to defend myself. I’ll admit my life was tough, but hey, at least I was alive, well, was.

“Name, John White. Sex, male. Age, 19.” A man in a white suit mumble to himself as he filled out a report. I guess even the afterlife has mundane desk jobs.

“Time of death, one month ago, August 5, 20xx”

So I die one month ago huh? By now, everybody should know that I’m dead. I wonder if anybody is mourning my death. Probably not. I really wasn’t a social person. The only person that ever talk to me was Ryder, and that’s because he saw me as nothing more than a pitiful child that needed guidance.

When we were off duty, he would always tell me that the world was so boring and peaceful in the past, that main thing he used to worry about, was what he was going eat for the day. He always looked distance when he talked about the past like he was staring at something I could never comprehend. I hated that part of him.

“Have regrets Mr. John?” The man in white pushes up his glasses and looked at me with concern.

“Hard to have regrets when I never had anything in the first place.”

“I know, I know everything about your tragic life.” The man in white pick up a document that had my name written on it. “Orphan since birth, a child soldier, no friends, no lover. You never got a chance to live, did you?”

“If you knew all this then why are you asking me?”

“Because John, ever soul that pass through here, immediately moved on. Except for you. You’ve been aimless wandering this place for a month now.

“Wait a month?” He said I died a month ago, which means I been here this whole time. What was I doing here, and why don’t I remember anything?!

“Those that have deep regret or suffer a gruesome fate will aimlessly wander the afterlife unaware of their own death.

“So, it’s because of my violent death that it took me a month to get my mind together?”

“Your death and regrets.”

Support creative writers by reading their stories on Royal Road, not stolen versions.

Why does he keep saying I have regrets? If he read my bio he should know that the only thing I care about was surviving to see another day. Now that I’m dead, not even that matters anymore.

“John.” Shepherd put his document down and gave me another one of his pity looks. “Souls are a fragile thing. They can’t survive long without a body, if you stay here any longer not only will you lose your memories again, but your soul itself will begin to fade from existence. So, I’ll ask you again, what is it that you regret?”

“….” My mind went blank. There truly was nothing I wanted or desire. Being a guy, I thought maybe I would be disappointed that I never got a chance to sleep with a girl. Or at least upset that I never met my parents. I guess being alone most of my life, that stuff became something I never truly care about. The only thing that came to my head when I thought about my past life is Ryder, and those stupid peace talks he uses to give me.

Now that I think about it, I was close to the base when I was attacked, is it possible that after killing me they went on to attack the base?

“Hey, can you show me what Ryder and everyone else is doing?”

“Very well.” A mirror once again appears in front of me, although instead of showing my reflection, it shows me a middle age man with graying hair staring at a tombstone with my name written on it.

Thank goodness, he’s alive. I’m not sure how I would react if he and everyone else die because I led the enemy to our base.

“You know, when you told me you were an orphan, I always hope that one day, when this war ended, you would send me a letter of with a picture of your wife and kids. And the letter would simply say ‘you were right Ryder; a family is one of best things you can have.’” Tears begin to stream down his face. “But I guess that isn’t possible anymore.”

I know this is kind of morbid, but I’m happy seeing him cry about my death. I always thought when I die no one would care or even notice.

“I promise you John, no one else will go through the same thing you went through, I promise you that I will end this war.” The image in the mirror begins to fade away, only a reflection of me looking lost remain.

“He’ll keep his promise.” I nearly jump when I heard shepherd’s voice, I was so absorbed by what I was seeing, I forgot about him.

“What, you can read the future?” Is what I wanted to say, but seeing how this day been going, I’m pretty sure I’m going to get a surprising answer if I ask.

“A year from now, Ryder will launch multiple devastating attacks on the enemy forcing them to surrender. After their defeat, the world will finally receive peace.

“Liar.”

“Why would I lie to you?”

“Because you said that your job was guide lost souls. I’m pretty sure a lot of people would happily follow you if you told them that everyone they known in their past life got a happy ending.”

“…You do have a point.” Shepherd scratches his head as he looks around the blank white room. “Not sure what I can do to convince you.”

“You don’t have to, I believe you.”

“What?”

“Well, I should say I want to believe you.” That’s the kind of guy Ryder is. When he says he’ll do something he will, I’m sure he can save the world.

“Not bad John, you’re starting to look much better now.”

“I do?” I look back at the mirror, all the bullet wounds, and blood that cover my body was gone now.

“When you first arrive here, you looked like a zombie that would collapse any second but now, it looks like you’re ready.”

“Ready for what?” A smile spread on his face the moment I ask him that question.

“Reincarnation.”