I took the long way around town to the back of the inn, which happened to border the forest. I couldn’t risk any of the other kids seeing me. They would make a scene. I hid behind a tree for a bit, to make sure no one was watching the clearing that separated the two. When it looked clear, I run for the door, slamming it shut behind me.
The storeroom’s door was open, Mom was carrying a sack potatoes from it. I took a second to catch my breath.
“Hey sneaky! You could have walked, gives me more time for fun with these potatoes.” she laughed. “Ready to go find some mushrooms?I think I’m going to make that soup you liked from last year’s equinox.”
I didn’t know how to explain my mistake. I didn’t want her. I didn’t want her to know that she would be hurt because I had been so careless. I had failed to keep an easy promise. Don’t remove the scarf and hood. So, I ran towards her with my arms open and held on to her for dear life as my eyes began to water. She shepherded me upstairs to one of the unused rooms, trying to quiet me on the way.
“So it looks like you’re not feeling up to mushrooms. Can you tell me what’s wrong?”
I tried to collect myself, occasionally blurting out “I” or “my”, but I kept choking on the pain of my shame.
“I need you to calm down if you’re going to explain anything.” she started rubbing my back to soothe me as I threw myself onto the clean bed.
“Your scarf is dirty. Does that have something to do with this?”
I nodded, and pulled the scarf off, showing my muddied face.
“People saw!” I managed to choke out.
Mom paused for a moment. She let took a deep breath.
“Why don’t you wash up in the baths, while I go grab Benevolence?”
“Yes ma’am.” I barely managed to say, my crying getting softer.
Mom stood up and left the room, she walked fast. I wrapped my scarf around my face again, and headed down to the inn’s bath, locking the door behind me as I cleaned up.
Benevolence and Mom walked into the room, Benevolence had a serious look on him that I had never seen before. I knew him as a happy, carefree person. This was not that Benevolence. There was more presence to him. My attention was required to be on him.
“Tea, Benevolence?” Mom asked.
“Yes please, Anna.” He nodded as he sat down in a chair that faced me on the bed.
He removed his holy symbol, an ornate leaf carved out of Oak, and handed it towards me.
“Sarah, I need to know everyone that saw you.”
“They were all kids...Michaela, Esther, Joseph, Vincent, and Max.” I said
“So the Goldleaf children, the Barrowmoor child, and the Smith children.” Mom walked back into the room and handed him a cup of tea.
“When was this?”
“About an hour ago, Benevolence.”
He set his cup down on the ground and looked upwards, placing his hand under his chin, scratching his uneven stubble.
“Fortunately, it was only children that saw you. This would have much more serious implications if it was any of the adults. How did this happen.”
I repeated what had happened with the game of bandits, and running into the branch that unraveled my hood.
“If they raise trouble at the next council I will have to think of a way to explain this away. I do not like lying, but it is something we will have to do, again, to make up for your mistake.” He picked up his cup and drank from it again.
“But it wasn’t my fault! They had asked me to play and I was trying to be polite and-” Benevolence interjected.
“Sarah, you put yourself in a vulnerable position. To rough house in such a manner puts you and your family at risk. You have been taught multiple times as to how you must act to protect those things. Whether or not it was your intent to reveal your face does not matter. What matters is that now the adults- Your mother, your grandparents and I- have to figure out how to correct the consequences of this misfortune.”
I shut my mouth, and held my anger back.
You don’t know what I go through. Just once. Just once! There was no risk! It isn’t my fault that something normal led to my scarf getting pulled! No one even tried to anyways!
“Benevolence. What if you just went and talked to the children?”
Mom asked.
“Anna, because to let those children know that I am aware of
what happened...it will mean that someone told me. That someone
would be Sarah. The best I can do to protect you and your family will be
to make an excuse as to how what they saw was not your daughter.”
Mom nodded, and then spoke.
“Benevolence, what help do you need of us?”
“More tea, for one.” He laughed as something in his body language
changed. He was less imposing now. Friendlier somehow. “But more
importantly, we need an alibi for Sarah.
Yvette and Michael will need to be informed before the next town
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council about this incident. The equinox is in ten days, which, if I check
my schedule-”He pulled out a small black book, and flipped to the middle. “Is in three days.”
Mom and Benevolence talked a bit more, and the plan was set before Benevolence left the inn. The rest of the day was less serious. Mom asked Dewey, her cook, to watch the inn while she spent the rest of the day with me. We were lucky it was past summer, turning into the slow seasons. The inn didn’t get many guests this time of year and in winter, cause we were so far west, and cut off by the mountains to the rest of the Kingdom. When it got hot, sometimes there would be twenty guests. Sometimes pilgrims, but usually merchants. One time a wanderer showed up, but I didn’t get the chance to meet him.
Because of the incident, going out for mushrooms wasn’t going to happen, so we mostly stayed inside and played cards and Parillion. Parrilon was played with each player having 7 pieces on a 20 square board. You wanted to lock down the other player’s pieces so they had no way to move, or you wanted to capture their 3 important pieces. I always forgot how the pieces moved, but Mom didn’t mind explaining. After losing more times than I can count, we went to bed. We had Grandpa and Grandma to talk to tomorrow.
We woke up before the sun was up. The dew on the grass had frosted over, and the fog was hanging off the town. Mom had her lantern lit, and gave me one of her old scarves from before I was born. She was working on mending the scarf from yesterday, and Mom pointed out I shouldn’t be looked at with that old one. I didn’t know exactly what Benevolence planned to say if it came up, but I knew whatever those kids saw in the forest was not me.
We cut through the inn, to the back door, so we didn’t get seen
walking through the middle of things. Inside, the chairs were turned on the tables, and the fire only had a couple of embers. Dewey had forgotten to knock the logs out. Mom went behind the bar and grabbed the crossbow she kept back there. The woods were dangerous before the sun knocked away the night. A couple of kids disappeared in them the year before I was born. We didn’t know what happened with them.
Mom handed me the lantern as she opened the door to the back of the inn, and we walked into the forest. The light of the lantern barely clung to the trees through the fog, but it was better than no light. I held onto her as she led us to the main path to my Grandparents’ home. We had been walking for about an hour, the fog hadn’t cleared, when Mom saw a tall, wide shape in the dark. It turned towards us, one of its “arms” splitting into tendrils. Mom grabbed my hand and pulled us behind a tree, while smothering the light in the lantern. There were slow, steady footsteps, and deep breathing coming from the direction we had seen figure. It was coming towards us.
Each step sounded closer to us, until they stopped. The creature was right next to us. Mom held her hand over my mouth so it wouldn’t hear us. Finally it spoke in a deep voice, like a growl. I felt it in the earth, in the pit of my stomach.
“K’al xit ral. Toril par skit.”
I went cold. Frozen. I was certain it knew we were here.
We heard more footsteps as the autumn leaves were crushed by more creatures as they moved through the oak forest. When the sounds stopped, Mom and I waited until the sun was out to stand up. To make sure the fog creatures were gone.
“Mom, were those Fell?”
“Yes. Thank The Ten for the fog or they would have found us.”
The Fell would sometimes hunt in the woods near the village. I had only heard stories of them during festivals. The first nightmare I can remember was after my Grandpa told a story of The Fell. How they took children, and ate them with their terrible mouths. Other stories were mostly the same. They are why we did not leave the village at night.
“Thank The Ten.” I said.
I meant it. Thank The Ten they couldn’t see us.
It was another hour until we had made it to my Grandparents’. The fog was starting to lift since the sun had risen above the mountains. The kiln and the house still had the shadows of the surrounding oaks, but the grass that was lit by the sun had started to thaw. I went to check on the kiln before we went inside. It was running a bit cold, so I shoveled some coal into the chute. Grandma was in the kitchen this morning, tending to a fire.
“Good morning Sarah.” Grandma said as she adjusted one of the logs. She looked up again as surprise swept across her face.
“Good morning Anna! To what do I owe the pleasure.” She said, smiling as she walked over to Mom to give her a hug.
“Something happened concerning Sarah. Is Father up yet?”
“Not yet, he was up late working on a new storage pot. The innkeeper in Tarvis Path has an order due in a couple of weeks. Michael wanted to fire this pot before the equinox. You know him, stubborn.”
Mom rolled her eyes and sighed.
“Sound like him. Let me help you with breakfast while we wait.”
Mom, Grandma, and I had just sat down to eat when Grandpa came out of his room. His face looked defeated, but the moment he saw Mom he was beaming, and full of energy. It was the most I had seen him smile.
“Anna, what are you doing here?” he asked.
“Something happened with Sarah, Benevolence told me to come talk to both of you.”
“Sarah looks fine. What time did you leave on your walk here?”
“Before dawn.”
“Through the forest?”
“Yes.”
Grandpa sat down, he was his normal stoic self.
“Child.” He turned to me. “What did you do?”
This was not going to go over well.
Mom jumped in.
“Don’t talk to her like that. She’s a kid, not a criminal.”
Mom and Grandpa looked at each other for a bit. Grandpa spoke again.
“I’m sorry Anna, I didn’t mean to be rude. I am tired. I was up late.”
Mom nodded, and then got Grandma and Grandpa up to speed.
“Okay, so we will have to go in for the town council?” Grandpa asked.
“Yes, you and Mom will have to go in. Benevolence thinks it would be best if you were present so that everyone believes Sarah was at home.”
“So I have to go all the way into town, just to make sure that if-” he raised his voice, “-If someone mentions something about your child, I can lie to these people who I have known for years, just to make sure there are no consequences for its mistake?”
Mom snapped
“You promised me and Jonathan you would help us raise the child! You promised the night she was born that you would help raise her, and keep her safe. You agreed to this. We walked through the damn forest full of Fell, so that way people wouldn’t kill Sarah if they found out the truth. Because you promised, all of those years ago when Jonathan disappeared, to help raise and protect her.”
“Jonathan didn’t disappear! As I told you, he left! And no wonder he fucking left because look at the mess he knew he left behind!” Grandpa shouted
Tears welled up in Mom’s eyes at those words. Why was Grandpa like this? He didn’t seem to like anything. Not me, or my Dad.
“You never liked Jonathan, and for no reason! But you swore in a temple of The Ten- The fucking Ten that you would help. You wanted to fucking kill her, but you decided to promise to your daughter you would help! I’m sick of your shit Michael!”
“Enough, both of you!” Grandma chimed in. I stood up and removed my scarf and hood while heading towards the door
“Child. You put those on right now!”
I turned around to stare at him. I wanted to scream. I was just a problem to him. An inconvenience. He had no idea what my life was like. No idea how painful it was to be me. I didn't choose this. I was punished by The Ten for being born. Forced to wear winter clothes in summer. No Friends. No Father. Every time I put on my hood I was reminded I also had no future.
I walked away from the house, to the edge of the forest. The arguing continued. The sun punctured a cloud, briefly hitting my faceI could still hear yelling from the house, but it was distant.
Grandpa wanted to kill me.
Umo, who had been grazing when I walked out trotted up to me. I hugged her mane, and cried again for what felt like the hundredth time in the past day.
Things would have been easier if he had.