Part 1: I, me, myself.
If you ask me ‘what I am’, then the best answer is ‘I am not sure’ for I have a condition like fragmented memories. It's like amnesia yet it delves upon a lack of knowledge and experience when stranded in this peculiar situation.
Yes, yes... This is the so-called cliché where you instinctively remember being a male or some anthropomorphic lifeform in a past life. But then, without expecting something to happen, you get reincarnated or transported to another world. And like always, the main character was an idiot at socializing, had a dumb life, and danced with hands instead of feet.
Hmm… It seems that my brain or whatever the thing containing my intellect is having trouble processing information. Maybe this isn't important, but I need to order my thoughts to...
You want to know what I am, right?
Then let me tell you what I know before we arrive at a conclusion.
First, I can't feel. Second, I can't see. Third, I can't hear.
Nothing...
Recalling part of my past is possible, yet some events remain blurry.
Anyways, I'll have to apologize, because my intent at introspection, ended in another absent-minded and non-comprehensible comment which doesn't even work as useful information.
How about this?
It seems that I'm lingering in a dark ocean, awaiting for destiny or some windy currents to send me towards a predetermined location.
Is this the so-called reincarnation?
Is this state what people call a soul?
Hm... Comprehensively speaking I think that since I preserve my thoughts, I should be alive, right?
This is odd, not because I think I'm not a soul, yet because I have been having a traveling sensation for so long, that I am becoming insane. I am alone and playing solitary with my mind is so boring that I might stop thinking.
Isn't this how reincarnation erases the memories of people. Isolating them to the point of making them insane and think there is someone apart from me, like you?
Yeah, you!
Do you want to play a game with me?
No?
C'mon, you are me so let's try.
If I'm a soul, what should I become once this weird reincarnation cycle is completed?
How about a carp that turns into a dragon, a mighty god that has all he wants or loses it but regains it with power, or maybe a powerful skeleton magician that can live forever and kill whoever interrupts its plans… Ok, those ideas are not working…
This is fatiguing, darkness isn't funny you know? What do you want me to be?
A god, a knight, a martial artist, a hero, an anti-hero or a gender-bent lady with big chests?
Hmm… It still doesn’t work?
Status?
Inventory?
I want to be a donkey?!!!
Okay, I tried.
If you asked me what the hell was I doing, it is simple. I thought that thinking these thoughts aloud will turn me into an OP guy or some weird byproduct of my wishes, yet as expected, It didn’t…
With this problem of unrecognizable introspection, my only hope is that I should have 'that'…
Yes, 'it' is extremely important. I don't believe that someone like me could live without it. The sole fact of receiving the possibility of a new body but being unable to rise is insane!
Yes! I must also be 'lucky' in this life. What I intend to tell, is that a life without luck is futile as it will not allow you to step towards the higher hierarchies of the world. I was pampered in my past life! I didn’t move a finger in it and got most of my necessities delivered by amazon... And my family.
My very nice progenitors, something that I am commencing to miss a lot and will probably never meet again. I-I wish that the same lucky star that shined upon me in my previous life illuminates the one to come. Please make this wish come true...
Praying for my sinful soul to be born into a remarkable household was my only chance. In addition to the never missing ability needed to rise. Well, the word rise is being employed a lot for unusual reasons. Curse whatever it is that has my psyche within!
Souls... bruh...
Oh, not that I don’t believe in you, God! Yes, whatever God that's watching me! Em, I need your starry help to make a wish. Yeah, not rising… No, wait… I need to be able to procrastinate and do nothing in this new life. Yeah, like nothing...
Not working? Should I be more specific to God?
God, please let me become a NEET that lives as a freeloader! Nothing, you don't understand?
It's like if I got the chance to repeat my life, I would want it to be just scratching my… Ups… God don’t be angry with me… I just need an opportunity to ris-become stronger, you know?
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Part 2: Magic words are needed for things to appear.
It was at that time, inside this monotone and unfeeling darkness, that I realized something. Maybe this God is just indifferent to an unknown and tiny sized variable in its domain. Maybe God just liked to watch ants fight while snapping its fingers to make half of them disappear. Yeah, no God gives stars for free to make said wishes come true, but they-
Hm, why did I?! Did I feel something?
There! It's warm?
God are you there?! What the hell am I supposed to be?
Yet nothing answered.
Okay, I don't know what I am! But it implies that the first course of action in such a situation was to remain calm… Never lift the soap from the ground when you don’t know what lies behind you. However, this mysterious darkness made my soul chill with an ominous sense.
Why am I not able to see nor perceive other things? I need to see something at least, but even breathing is impossible to achieve. I guess I am in an extremely unadaptable situation in which I don’t need to breathe, yet it was an odd sensation to stop doing that. I believe that in this kind of environment, insanity would take over anyone adding questions one after another.
And believe me, I felt it like 100 times better than anyone else would. I haven't been able to feel 'touch' for a long while, and this... This was creepy!
I know some Gods are touchy, like that Zeus-god or Olympus guy that impregnated... Um, did he even impregnate males? Wait! I don't know what I am... this is bad... like really bad!
What would a normal person with a calm mind think in this situation?
A person like that will calm themselves and brace for the inevitable...
I wish I could play games or read to relax. God let me be inside my room and press a button or some command to power on my-
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My train of thought was cut at such a moment when I had the idea of 'turning on'. A glowy item jumped over my mind-vision miraculously. I could see this item in front of whatever were supposed to be my eyes. And for an aerospatial engineer’s sake, it wasn’t a space-xxx rocket or I would have been given a futuristic scare. And I ain't no aerospatial engineer...
Are you wondering what this blue thing that appeared in front of my mind is?
Well, I suppose anyone would guess it right.
It’s a loading screen!
Hey, are you god?
Are you my system?
Window-chan?
Loading Window Interface...
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Part 3: The wait.
This isn’t as I expected, there's no answer to my voice. Isn't there supposed to be a God when these windows appear, or is it just taking it's time to initiate the operative system?
Is it on purpose?
Making my incredible self wait and become bored again?
...
System interface loaded. Database acknowledged. Project initiated. Simulation of current interactions done. Starting maintenance of hierarchical structures.
Updating protocols and Assembling… 1%
NO WAY! 1%?
Are you a pizza delivery? A bank giving money?
Seriously, systems nowadays should be made like tax programs, those take like 0.1 seconds to kill your wallet!
System interface loaded. Database acknowledged. Project initiated. Simulation of current interactions done. Starting maintenance of hierarchical structures.
Updating protocols and Assembling… 1.1%
Yes, this is worse than waiting for some steam engine to load. It makes my comments here shallow because there is nothing else to do except looking at a very slow turtle of an upgrading-number jumping up. And for the love of God, there is no additional turtle, there are no extra sounds, and there is no action. It's not funny!
GOD!!! Where are you?!!!
Help me!!!
This is a long time to wait and I don’t have coffee nor snacks!
This is hell! Satan can you hear me?! This cursed system is trash!
At least add the missing turtle...
Boring lobby imaginary music played in my mind. There was a lack of waiters coming to my table to ask for my imaginary coffee addiction bill. The waiting was so long that I decided to leave and run.
Yeah, I can’t. But this is seriously driving me crazy. If I could do some command to shut-down myself and leave some autopilot while I wait for this system to-
Command acknowledged...
Eh, green command acknowledged? !!!
Shutting off 'User' program…
Starting automatic systems…
Wait, Don't tell me you can turn it off while it loads... No! Why?! Stop that!!!
...
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Part 4: Reboot.
Reconnecting User Interface... 1-100%
Booting and restarting Completed!
I sang 'the system went down' for a long time alone.
But after restarting and learning to be patient, everything became better.
It was a feeling.
Yeah! I could feel.
Weird, but when these windows popped up, I could sense.
The sensations that I could perceive were temperature and touch. It felt... like flying, but also like drifting and turning. A cold sensation invaded half of myself, while a hot-warm feeling attacked the half that remained. I could feel two surfaces, this feeling made me think I was some flat lifeform... The hell...
Am I a damn pancake?
The Earth is flat, so I am Earth?!
...
Okay, maybe not, but incredible as it is, my crazy mind found the solution to my dilemma in the form of the word 'command'.
God! I command you to explain!
Command not registered in the system, please check the current command windows.
Command Open!
Command not registered in the system, please check the current command windows.
Command Vision!
The narrative has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the infringement.
Command not registered in the system, please check the current command windows.
Damn you! Stupid and adulterated system!
Command...
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Part 5: How to tame your windows.
After a long play with different words using commands and some other words without strings attached, I found the practical use to this interface. Here, let me show you, my imaginary friend...
What? No response?
Oh, I neglected again that it's all in my head. I shall argue with 'me' while adopting a different ‘thought voice’.
It seems like the loading was completed by the auto-process, again, yet I don’t know why it brought my thoughts to the surface.
Ah, who cares about me talking to me...Let's just try these instructions.
Command Console!
Retrieving console command...
After retrieving the data, another window popped up in front of me. It was blue and had many words in it, yet a lot of its sections were missing parts of what seemed beneficial information. Some of its abbreviations couldn't be conjectured and some values were undefined or non-existant.
Am I supposed to define these undefined or null variables and repair the broken sectors? Why? I don’t know… I am reading about it now, let me check.
G00's Status Name: G00 Completion Status: BF&! % complete - OP$M# % lost - LÑ=| % unknown Nanorobots: Shows NMs Status NMs 130/??? Form Puddle CE Low (Not varying) EC ??? DEC ??? Ais 1 (AI 16) ??? 12912-90481-20841-00000 ??? AFJASFJAKSFLASFJFASL ??? GJSDHSKDANAASDKAD Commands Administrator exclusive algorithms. Console Shows status and Admin privileges information. Run Runs a specified algorithm Create Creates a new algorithm Modify Changes a setting, algorithm or privileges. Settings Settings for Language, Colors, Notifications, AI Makes AI analyze information. Many commands included. Needs input. Auto Runs auto mode algorithm Algorithms Creates a recipe or formula based on user input AI Form Changes Form by using an NAI input. View, Play Shows, Reproduces a Memory or Data in storage Ask Asks an AI or specified protocol for a reply. Say Repeats user's input Search Searches Databases for information. ??? Unavailable Active users Checks on users interacting with the project. ??? Unknown User Privilege Temporary Admin Page 1/2
Project G00 Console Name Project G00 Current Time Unknown Creation Info Unknown
LOG 001
Error 12389 - Auto process failure for compilation.
The process needs user input...
User input found...
User needs admin privileges, no admin found...
Giving temporary privileges...
User input damaged, retrieving user data...
Cleaning user database. Defragmenting 1%... 100%...
Using user database to compile project...
User compilation unsuccessful...
Adjusting language to user known language... 1%...100%...
Language database created...
Restarting interface...
Restarting successful...
Creating user interface...
Sensor information incompatible with user...
Adjusting...
Sensor creation... 1%... 8%... failure...
Sensor creation incomplete...
Skipping to User Manual Command...
Shutting off auto mode...
Sensor creation... 1%... 8%... failure...
Sensor creation incomplete...
Skipping to User Manual Command...
Shutting off auto mode...
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LOG 002
Error 12389 - Auto process failure for compilation.
User directive found, turning on...
User shutting command acknowledged...
Auto mode restarted...
Finished shutting off User Manual Command...
Adjusting Form...
Moving...
Energy Source not found...
Error: Not enough energy to sustain NMs.
Separating AIs and...
Separation complete.
User input designated to AI 16.
Moving...
Searching...
Mild heat energy source found...
Error: Not enough energy to maintain auto mode.
Adjusting Form and Sensors...
Changing to manual command...
User interface restarted...
Page 2/2
So there you have it. I am called Goo and I am a puddle or at least, that’s what the project’s console says.
Hm, those O’s are actually 0’s.
Okay, it doesn’t matter so let’s try this… I aaaam Gooooo!
Nice!!! I wanted to say/think that.
Now, let's get some information from this AI.
Command AI ask: What is my current location?
Current Location: Unknown.
Command AI ask: What is the project’s purpose?
Project purpose: Data unavailable or incomplete.
Command AI ask: Why is the current project declared as incomplete?
Project Resources: Incomplete after fragmentation. The project needs user input in case of an emergency.
As I continued, my queries weren’t answered the way I needed the AI to. Most of the things were either incomplete or untranslatable. In my current state, sanity wasn’t the first thing you would base your thought process on. If a logical approach isn’t working then we need to cheat and get those restricted sectors of the storage back to light!
Good thing there isn’t a raccoon or some voyeur-god here to judge my current decision. But if you were me, being able to think but unable to interact or look outside, jailed inside a spaceship without an internet connection for years, what will be the things you wish to do?
I myself wish to see and in addition to that… Well, it shouldn’t be a mystery, right?
With such in mind, I quickly run another command to satisfy these urges. Something which is necessary for such extreme conditions and feelings that couldn't be fulfilled when left so much time in the unknown nothingness. I say all this because...
It's incredible how adaptable we humans can become when insanity affects us, we even learn how to cheat systems and instruct them to do our bindings. Here, let me show you guys...
Command Modify! Modify the temporal user to a permanent user. Make admin privileges only available for said user. Change username to G00.
Modifying requested settings...
Modifications complete.
See, EZ (Easy).
Command search!
Please specify what you wish to search for.
Listening to User command...
I see that window and I know where this is going...
It's imperative to take advantage now that my privacy is secure and no Godgle data is being retrieved.
Command search for boobies!
No item called 'boobies' found in the AIs database.
What?!
Not yours! I have been trying to search for things in your database but all became impossible to understand. Were you always searching in your own database?
Command search for boobies in the user database. Also, include user database in all future search commands.
Seriously...
Searching for boobies in the user's database… Search command adjusted...
Found 137882 records matching!
Nice! My memories work! Halleluyah!!! Now that I got my cheat, I will use it to overhaul this into my favor. Yet before that, I need something nice to release all this pent up and isolated emotions.
Command AI please play...
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Part 6: Even an adult will become a kid with a new toy... Maybe?
After watching some nice balloons and cat videos, my partially satisfied soul continued to check on the AI's commands and how to crack them.
Command AI!
Checking for input…
Nice weather isn’t it?
Incomprehensible input!
Please repeat input. Checking for input…
Can’t you take a joke?
Searching 'Can't you take a joke?' in the user's database… Matches found… Sorting… Analyzing… Retrieving answer…
“Chuck Norris doesn’t tell lies, he changes facts.” Taken from: A joke by chuck Norris shouldn’t be trusted…
Wait! You are learning?! Is this an evolving Pocket-AI?
Command AI Say that I love you!
“That I love you!”
Oh! That didn’t need you to analyze information… Interesting.
Let’s be serious then. Man, all that time of having my brain or soul unused is hurting me. Wait, I don’t have a brain… That explains this weird way of thinking…
Oh yeah! I am supposed to be the ‘privileged user’.
Command AI! Play me a song, anything. One of my favorites!
Searching for 'random song' in the user’s database...
I really love this shit! (the AI).
If you find some romantic stuff I would be dancing all night with you…
How about some funky thing like that song that goes ‘tonight’s gonna be a good, good night!’ It can also be something cool or more moving like party music.
Command AI repeat 100 times the song you find! I am sure you’ll find a nice one.
Song found!
Playing the selected song from the user's database: "BSD"
‘Baby shark dun du du du du du dun, Baby shark dun du du du du du dun…’
Repeating 99 times after reproduction...
OMG seriously… Why did you find that song?!
Nevermind…
Daddy shark doo doo doo doo doo doo…
I guess I am just creative.
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Part 7: Nothing is free. Except for free real est...
Sadly, while I was watching videos, listening to music and having a good moment in my new life...
Warning, Warning!
Eh, What the?!
Warning, energy levels decreasing rapidly...
Is this what the AI meant?! Wait, isn't energy like my life if I am a puddle robot?!
Command AI! Why did energy decrease?!
Replying user…
Consumption of power exceeds energy sustainability:
65% %3V5&vSS|f"34Nc
19% A23°Vcfa#5g&y/53%
1% Standby mode.
5% System consumption.
Why didn’t you tell me? And what the hell are those things eating all the energy?!
Command AI: What is %3V5&vSS|f"34Nc and A23°Vcfa#5g&y/53%?
Replying user...
Error while compiling...
Repairing...
Answering...
65% User playing BBs and cats videos.
19% User playing ‘BSD’ song 99 times.
Damn, this is CATastrophic!
Having my no-brain blown with a no-brainer tune was noise. What wasn’t nice is being stopped in the middle of motivation, something that forced me to ask the AI, ‘where the hell could I find some friggin’ weed, aka energy’.
I need to chill dude! This little body of water doesn’t want some bad waves in its life!
I am a puddle and puddles are to be stepped upon. They can’t procrastinate because when you want to do anything, the rain just falls and you become wet, so rain isn’t pleasant yet it helps you to grow. But the real trouble is when some fool missteps on you and curses at you with puddle-banned language. Something I can't tolera-
User Interface is incoherent...
Do you wish to stop the user interface from running?
Don't you dare to stop it!
Or we will see a broken window!
Okay me, calm down... This is not nice.
Momma told me to be a healthy child, and a good son should have fascinating waifus, nice food, and laifu.
I won’t become the first M-puddle player to be stepped on by others in history. I need to ‘cultivate’ or 'level-up' and become a god-pool. Like a cockroach that people can’t step over or even kill because of some weird power. At least, It will allow me to make jokes about those that try to dance better than me.
Incoherent program running...
Oh, is this odd?
Command AI: make user programs a high priority.
User programs are now high priority.
Maybe if I find people now, they will think I can’t hold a conversation because I am basically insane. But getting on the point I told before...
Command AI where can I find the energy?
Energy needs to be extracted with a specialized system.
Command AI what type of energy can you use?
Current systems working on heat and q&N%UM dot T%CHN)=nl8g&.
Command AI are you in heat?
The current sensor state is: warm...
Hm, let's omit that happened...
Command AI can’t you adjust displayed energy level to something numerical like a percentage?
Current energy levels aren’t able to be measurable with precision…
An ordinal variable can be adjusted to a constant numerical value...
Great so if I ask about temperature things will be the same. Seems like my senses are low level, I need to check on them once I understand more. For now, I prefer using percentages for energy. At least the AI can do some calculus.
Command AI please use the following values for empty (0%), almost empty (10%), very low - 20%... Medium 50%... Full 100%...
Energy levels adjusted to show percentage upon specified values
Command AI show me the current energy level?
Current energy level: 10% and charging...
I played the 'commands answer and question game' with the AI as it tried to give an appropriate response to my queries, yet I find it very impractical and inefficient. For example, why didn’t it find other sources of energy?
The answer is because it is stupid… I mean an AI that’s damaged will have some problems and that’s the reason why it used my mind to correct its mistakes.
Sadly, this situation made things worse for it, yet excellent for me as I can be the admin and choose a direction. AIs need help to evolve, you can’t make a learning AI without following some logical creature's way of thought. They need someone that teaches them.
So baby AI DooDoo and me Mr. #2 puddle G00, will be training ourselves with a new song.
A song that introduced my weird reincarnation, or what I believed was a reincarnation, into a robotic puddle composed of NMs.
Okay, baby! It’s time for some blind-puddle rock!
Command AI play me some rock music!