In a dark cave lived a guy named Kenny. He looked like someone who's kinda lost in life – messy facial hair, glasses that glow like magic, long hair covering his eyes, and a skinny body. His room was like a maze with pizza boxes, tangled headphone wires, and big piles of laundry that could've been a wall, but it smelled so bad that even making a joke about a wall was canceled.

Kenny wasn't into doing much, like he had zero interest in anything. He was all about being lazy and not putting in effort. He called himself the champion of laziness. He spent most of his time watching TV like a sloth on a TV marathon. He was really into Pokémon, following Ash's journey since Pikachu zapped him.

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But things weren't easy for Kenny. His parents died when he was nineteen, which was tough. He dropped out of college and now gets money from some properties his parents owned. He lives off that money. He's kinda like a landlord now.

One day, Kenny got up from his bed, which was a big deal for him. He felt like his bones were creaking all over, like a bunch of snakes were rattling. He put on flip-flops and walked a bit, and then...

BOOM 💥

He lost focus, his eyes went blurry, and he felt pain everywhere. He saw headlights and heard a loud ringing sound. He managed to say, "Hey, truck, you suck!" before passing out. Kenny heard, "Oh my God, they killed Kenny!" and "You jerks!" (Note: This Kenny isn't the one from South Park.)