Empty head, rhythmic footsteps, lowered eyes only semi-focused on the ground. I'm sure everyone’s gone through these motions at least twice in their lives. Or maybe this type of brooding was only brought in with the modern inventions of hoodies and crusted sidewalks.
Not that I’m brooding or anything. That's right, that entire segment beforehand is completely unrelated to my current activity.
What I'm doing is deliberating.
Pondering is also accepted.
You see, I'm in the middle of making a very important decision. Or rather, I would’ve been 2 minutes from now. Being the clever gremlin that I am, I decided to start my contemplations before my destination as to completely and efficiently min-max my time spent.
Kidding. I just suck at quick thinking and this is the best way for me to compensate.
Hm, should I have Red tonight? Or Blue? Or should I go with the out-of-left-field choice and go with Yellow? Gah, idiot, you shouldn't start creating more options for yourself if you're already having trouble deciding! Complete amateur hour.
Who knew picking out frozen pastas from the grocery store could be such a chore? If I hadn’t started planning ahead, I'd probably cause a clog up in the aisle. Although, at the rate my deliberating was going, it looked like that would be my fate after all.
"Maybe I should call Dad and ask if he wants anything..."
The idea floated around in my head for a few moments before I waved it away.
"Nah, he's too busy to be worried about something as stupid as this…"
Ah, crap. I’d zoned out for too long. Before I knew it, I had auto piloted through the store’s entrance and was currently making my way down the frozen section.
And now, my destiny awaits before me while I, the ill-prepared 17-year old I am, shake and tremble before this almighty kismet. The horror, the pain, the nightmare of every introvert across the world: holding up a line. My God, they weren’t even real yet and I’m already trembling from the enraged customers shouting as they blame me for holding up their shopping, causing their family member, who desperately needed help with a medical emergency, to pass away just as they came home, their entire life crumbling around them, all because of this stupid, idiotic teenager who couldn’t pick out his-
“Eh? They’re out? How are they out?! And of every single type!?”
Alas, I had escaped my assured destiny at the cost of my beloved. Not the tragedy that I had previously imagined, although a tragedy nonetheless.
“The hell… there’s no way. Maybe the clerk made a mistake with shelving or something.”
Scratching my head, I spoke aloud the only logical conclusion to this dilemma that I could think of.
The quest to find the missing pasta. So, yeah, I guess not a tragedy.
Yet.
I’m feeling pretty pessimistic all of a sudden.
Hmm, guess I’ll have to ask the clerk… but isn’t that also an introvert’s nightmare? Seems like I’m getting seriously scammed by the universe over here.
Oh well, been there, done that. Talking to the cleric, I mean. We’ve exchanged pleasantries over dozens of times. I’m sure asking a question that might interrupt his potentially peaceful day won’t get me on his bad side. Nope. Not at all. In fact, I’m just gonna walk up and ask him right now.
Ohhh, premium dog food with tuna and vegetable seasoning, huh? I wonder if Pistachio would like-
Nononono, stop stalling, we’re getting to the bottom of this pasta mystery.
Aaaaas soon as that massive line to the counter clears up. Alas we meet anyways, oh inevitable fate. Just in a separately imagined domain, one not of aisles, but of clerk counters.
I started to reach for my phone to pass the time before remembering that I had left the stupid thing back at the house. I usually never leave home without it, but this had only been meant to be a quick dinner grab lasting not even 5 minutes total. Not worth taking it off the charger. Oh well, I guess the analog clock on the wall would have to do for entertainment.
5:43... 5:43... 5:43... 5:43... 5:43... 5:43... 5:43… 5:44... 5:44... 5:44... 5:44... 5:44... 5:44... 5:44... 5:4- alright enough of that, I’m gonna end up in a mental ward at this rate.
Luckily in the midst of my clock counting (5:45), the line had moved up just enough for me to reach the magazine rack. A slight wave of nostalgia washed over me as I recalled a young me (well, young-er) fascinatedly turning the pages of each weekly superhero issue while my mother went off to go find the groceries. Simpler times.
While I didn’t see any Beetle-Man covers in this grouping, another colorful comic caught my eye. On its adorned front page was a charming assortment of fantasy creatures. The title heading plastered across the top in yellow ink with a blue outline read:
Pokémon.
I smiled at the familiar faces, mentally going through the names of each character I spotted.
Froakie, Cinderace, Grotle, Blaziken, Bayleef, Quaxly, Oshawott, Dartrix, and of course, Charizard.
A promotional poster image of starters across all 9 current generations. I admired the art from afar, but didn’t go to pick it up. It’s a bit embarrassing to admit this, but I’m confident that the book wouldn’t hold any information I didn’t already know. Being a prodigy student in your early years of school tended to make you delve pretty far in your hobbies to escape from boredom. My brain’s probably more full of Pokémon knowledge than actually useful information, much to the dismay of my parents.
An annoyed cough from behind caused me to straighten my back in a sudden startled panic, snapping me out of my musings. Bewilderedly turning around, I met the eyes of a grumpy looking man carrying two heavy looking grocery bags. Seeing my surprise, he grimaced and flicked his head to the counter. It was then I realized that the line in front of me had since vanished. I had been holding up the people behind me causing a disturbance to their shopping.
Inevitable fate indeed.
Thanks to that terrifying encounter, I had lamely asked the clerk about the missing pasta in a wobbling voice. Thankfully, he took kindly to my embarrassing scene. Unthankfully, I was told that shipment was running late and they were out of many frozen goods until further notice. Pasta included.
So not my lucky day.
Now what should I get? Toast with peanut butter? Try my hand at making some pudding back home? Or maybe I could grill a burger patty- no wait, wouldn’t that also be a frozen good, henceforth not being available? I could check, but I don’t really wanna go through the effort just to be disappointed again…
Amidst my thoughts, I found my drifting eyes landing back onto the Pokémon magazine.
…
“Wouldn’t life be simpler if Pokémon were real? Honestly seems like a massive oversight from the universe.”
…
Where had that come from?!?
I know things aren’t going the greatest for me right now, but seriously? C’mon, let's focus on reality.
But no matter how much I tried to get rid of the idea, like a stubborn burdock, it relentlessly latched onto my brain.
If Pokémon were real… then transportation would be so much easier. Agricultural development would definitely advance. World hunger might come to a stop. Maybe people would learn to not be such jerks. Maybe we would be able to find infinite energy. Limited resources would be a thing of the past. Pollution would get cleaned up faster than anyone could think of it being a problem.
I wouldn’t have to worry about what meal to eat on my own. I wouldn’t have to wonder how to waste the day away without bothering anyone. I’d be too distracted. Too amazed.
Who knows?
Maybe I’d have an actual goal in life…
ALRIGHT, enough of this depressing talk, or I guess, thinking? Either way, like I always say, being all sad won’t change nothing for the better. “Just gotta do what you gotta do!”
Right. Yeah.
Only “just”.
…
*BEEP*
“#@%^$&!”
For the second time today, my back was assaulted by my tendency to straighten up in a panic. A sharp loud beep had broken me out of my own spell, while also causing my heart rate to skyrocket.
Perplexedly scanning my surroundings, I found that in front of me was a self checkout kiosk. My right hand was holding a can of chili beans, which had been in the middle of being scanned, causing the sudden beep. Evidently, I had been on autopilot again.
“...”
Offering the machine nothing but a grimace (and the loose change I had in my pocket), I grumply exited the shop with apparently my subconscious food of choice in hand.
Letting out a long sigh, I inspected my bounty while walking along.
“‘Classic style’, huh? I was hoping for the mild, but I guess I should just be happy I didn’t grab the vegan option. Beggars can’t be choosers.”
Tossing the can up and down as I walked, I approached a darkened traffic intersection and waited for my walk signal to turn green.
Ordinarily there would be a crossing guard overviewing the area due to the elementary school nearby, but today was a saturday evening, so no one was around to keep me company in the cold.
Just me. Humming to the night sky with my can o’ beans. Not a car or person in sight.
No animals either. Come to think of it, shouldn’t I at least be hearing crickets? Or maybe they don’t sing during autumn. Well, I should at least be hearing an owl hooting or a dog barking in the distance. Heck, there wasn’t even a gust of wind in the area.
What’s with the eerie silence?
*Tcsk*
With a small click, the walk signal’s small LED red hand instantly switched to a green go symbol.
“Finally! I was beginning to think it was broken or somethi-”
*BLAAAAARE*
Stepping onto the road, I was suddenly pelted by the loudest truck horn I had ever heard. My hands instinctively came up to shield my ears, but I only ended up bashing the side of my skull with the chili container.
Dazedly turning my head to the left, I could faintly make out the contours of a truck barreling down the road toward me at startling speeds.
W-what the hell-?! Why don’t they have their headlights on? And this is a residential school zone, what do they think they’re doing going that fast?
In a panic, I watched as the truck drew closer and closer without losing momentum until-
*VROOOOOOOOM*
It zoomed right by me while running the red light.
…
“Are-are they gonna be alright?”
Thanks to their horn going off when I had only taken a single step onto the road, I had been able to get back onto the sidewalk without getting hurt. Furrowing my brow, I was concerned about what the driver’s situation was.
“No lights and no attempt at slowing down… is some sort of event happening? Was that a robber's car?”
However, the night returned to its undisturbed silence after the truck’s passing. Not a single police siren or angry mob to be heard.
“Hm, well, at least as far as I can tell, nobody was hurt…”
If you discover this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.
Scratching my head, I turned back to the crosswalk only to find that my walk signal had turned back to red.
“Oh, come on! Seriously, what is going on today?!”
Grumbling to myself, I kicked some gravel out onto the road in a huff, listening to the rhythmic bounces echo through the dark. The main road ran perpendicular to my crosswalk, so it would take longer than usual for my turn to come.
“Gah, why am I even waiting, there’s no one around! I should just jaywalk and be done with it.”
Yet despite everything, I remained rooted to the spot. I guess the runaway truck had me a bit paranoid regarding road safety.
“Maybe I should’ve bought that Pokémon magazine after all.”
Sighing to myself in deep lamentation, I almost missed the sound of whooshing air above me. However, there was no way to not notice the following gust that almost knocked me over.
“Waaah-!”
Having not expected it, it took me a few seconds to retain my balance and not trip over my own feet.
Was that a bird? It felt like it barely passed a few inches above my head. And for it to generate this much air pressure… Well, it definitely wasn’t a chickadee.
Before I could properly run through possible “breeze and run” candidates (or would it be “breeze and fly”?), a loud crash reverberated through the street.
*SMASH*
“What the-!?”
The lack of lit houses signalled that none of the neighbourhood residents were home, however the ensuing darkness could have caused someone to fall and hurt themselves.
Running over to investigate, I found that the source of the commotion was in an almost pitch black alleyway jammed between two of the residential homes.
I paused a bit before reluctantly approaching the entrance for a better look.
“This is totally horror movie material…” I muttered.
The closest sidewalk lamp was only close enough to let the bare minimum amount of light leak through, basically meaning that without entering the alleyway itself, the best I would be able to do was make out shadow outlines.
What am I even doing? That gust of wind from before probably just knocked some trash can over. No need for me to be all scared and uptight…
While I was inwardly trying to tell myself that this wasn’t a big deal, my body seemed to disagree with me. My right arm was brandishing my metal bean can like it was a lethal weapon, ready to clonk anyone or anything that dared to jump out at me.
As much as I wanted to take my inner voice’s side and lower the chili, there were clear noises of rummaging in the 5 metre wide corridor. There was something alive in there.
Is it a person? The reason someone would be out here is if they were a robber though…
I nervously side eyed my precious future dinner.
I mean… if I swung hard enough, then maybe?
However, as my eyes grew more accustomed to the darkness, I could see the vague movements better and better, and ended up doubting the idea.
It didn’t look… bipedal.
So an animal then.
What should I do? I could just ignore it and move along, but what if it ends up causing damage because of that? It’s way too big to be a rat, but it might still be able to chew through wires and plumbing. There’s also the possibility that it surprises someone and they accidentally fall out onto the road…
Ok, what if I call 911? Or a pest remover? They should be able to deal with this way better than I can. Ah, but I don’t have my phone on me…
I suddenly thought back to the mystery bird from earlier. The crash had come only a few moments after the breeze, and from the same direction that he had been pushed toward too.
And judging from the size of the outline and the air pressure it had left behind… it was more than likely that this was the same culprit.
So a big bird, huh? Too large to be a hawk or eagle, too wide to be a crane… so a swan or a goose then?
…
I mean… say I run all the way back to the house and make the call. By the time they show up, it may have already flown off and all I’d have done is waste everyone’s time… besides, geese are only territory when nests are involved, and that’s during the spring. I can gently shoo it away myself without bothering anyone. Without being a burden. Besides, even if it is dangerous, I have my bean- I mean my metal, er, container to bash it with.
Taking a deep breath, I reassured myself.
Yeah. Yeah, I got this. No need to bring others into this.
I decided that sneaking up on it would be counterintuitive; I wasn’t trying to ambush it, rather push it away to a safer location. The back of the alley was fenced, but as long as I gave it plenty of time and runway, it could fly right over easy.
Loudly clearing my throat to establish my presence, I took one casual step into the alley. Not too fast to startle it, and not too slow to make it seem like I had an agenda.
If all goes well, it should notice me, honk, stare a little, I take another step, it flies away to safety. Simple.
Or at least it was supposed to be. Step 1 when great. It could definitely hear it flick around at me, with the trash crumpling all over the place.
Ironically, step 2 was where it all fell to pieces. I was expecting a honk from a bird. Certainly not a growl from a large mammal.
Oh schnitzel.
So I’ll be the first to admit: I’m an idiot. Any kids listening to my cautionary tale, let this be a lesson to all of you to let professionals deal with wild animals, no matter how confident you may be.
Although, in my defense, I was set up. That damn bird from before was too perfectly timed with this black bear-sized creature causing a mess. Were they working together?! Damn it, I’ve never heard of actual bait and switches in nature, but it probably was the case. The bird lures prey over, this thing kills it and then they both feast.
Maaaaaan, today is so not my lucky day.
…
It hadn’t moved.
That entire exposition had lasted about 5 seconds in real life, which should’ve been plenty for it to comprehend my existence and attack. Of course, I had my trusty beans to help me fend it off, but somehow I didn’t think that was the reason for it’s hesitation.
It just stayed there, lowered to the ground, facing me while growling.
Of course, the only things I could 100% make out were that it was staying rooted to the spot and growling. Still too dark to see any details, but context clues help.
“Erm… hey boy?”
I tried calling out to it to see if it was just a particularly large and paranoid dog, but it didn’t seem to react kindly to my words.
In fact, it tried to shift around and presumably jump at me, but it collapsed almost immediately with a whimper.
Oh… it’s injured.
Maybe it’s because I was too tired to think straight. Maybe it’s because I have my own dog that I take care of. Maybe it’s because I was curious about what the creature was. I didn’t know.
The only thing I can say is that before I knew it, I was crouched down not even a metre away from the thing, offering it my chili.
“Hey, hey, easy. I don’t know what happened, but let’s calm down, okay? Here, I got some food, see? I don’t know if you’ll like the spice, but it’s gotta be better than some random glass shards and paper shreds, don’t you think?”
I had no idea what I was doing. I will reiterate for any children in the audience: DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME.
Even if it is wounded, suddenly going towards a wild animal and waving a can of food in front of it is a fast way to get bit. And that’s the best scenario.
However, by some miracle, the unknown creature stopped its growling. From its dark silhouette, it seemed to regard me for a few moments while I held my breath. Then it started to expectedly sniff the can in my hand.
-Eh? Did it… understand what I said? I mean, there’s no way any animal would be able to read my intentions through what I just did without already trusting humans, and judging from its reaction beforehand-
While my inner thoughts were spinning in confusion, the creature lifted a paw and started to claw at the can as if saying “hey, you promised me beans, so come on, open up!”
“Oh, uh, yeah sorry, here…”
I started to try and peel the top away while observing the paw that had come forward. I wasn’t completely sure, but It seemed that it was entirely sleek black fur. Sort of like a panter’s.
In fact, now that my eyes had adjusted ever so slightly to the dark, I started to see the animal in better detail. While it was definitely a large mammal, it wasn’t entirely black bear size.
Some parts of it seemed to floof up a bit more than others, giving it a larger appearance. From its proportions, it looked to be an oversized cat.
I realized that with all the craziness beforehand, I was strangely overtaken by a sense of calm. Was it because I had called some sort of truce with Mr. Mystery Animal?
“Hold on, usually I use a fork to get into the small areas. Maybe there’s something else around here I can use…”
Making sure to slowly get up so as to not startle the pseudo-cat, I started looking around on the ground for something to help open the can with.
I tried a thrown out toothpick, but it snapped before getting any good leverage.
Then I tried a broken screwdriver, but it wouldn’t fit properly.
Then a sheet of paper, but… well, you know.
Throughout my rummage, I could feel the animal’s eyes on me the entire time.
“Bleh, so gross. I’m definitely washing up first thing when I get home. Dammit, where the hell is a fork? It’s gonna take me forever to find one in this mess- oh nevermind, here’s one!”
After spotting it, I snatched the fork from out of the air, and turned my attention back to the ca-
“...Why was there a floating fork-?”
“Ment.”
“Hm-?”
My brain was going into sudden overheat mode from trying to figure out what it should be startled by first: the flying utensil or the fact that the animal just let out a very weird bark.
“Uhhhh-?”
The feeling of calm I had from before was slowly deteriorating, being replaced by a cold sense of unease. Something about this… was wrong. I didn’t know exactly how to explain it, but it felt like I was in the middle of something never before seen.
The creature started to stand up with difficulty. It looked like it was indeed injured. I wanted to try and get it to sit back down.
But my voice didn’t work.
My mouth felt dry.
I just stared as it took one wobbling step after another toward me.
I had ventured out to the very entrance of the alley to find a fork, so the light was quite clear here.
And as it slowly closed the distance, more and more of its body became clear to me.
I was still sitting down, ready to pry open the beans, so we were both at about eye level of each other.
So of course, the eyes were the first thing I saw.
A shade of deep blue. One as dark as the oce- wait, no, now it was light blue, as clear as the sk-, then it was dark as the oce-, it changed again to match the sk-
Blinking at the creature, I attempted to ask it-
“Hey, aren’t you-?”
But before I could finish my sentence, everything went black.
*Groan*
Two things.
One, I had a headache.
And two, something was licking my face.
The familiar feeling told me it was a dog’s tongue.
“Pistachio, what did we say about coming into the bedrooms while we’re sleeping?”
I groggily called out to my stupid pup, but the shower of affection did not show any signs of stopping. Nor did the throbbing in my cerebrum.
“Pistachio! Down!” I commanded, but to no avail.
Why was he being so disobedient all of a sudden?
Actually, come to think of it, how did he even get on my bed? Poor dog does NOT have good jumping ability.
While trying to push Pistachio away, I felt that my bed… was in fact not my bed. Too solid and too cold. And grassy? And is that sunlight in my eye?
“Ah crap, did I fall asleep on the lawn or something? Okay, for real, that’s enough Pistachio!” I shouted as a final warning.
“Lilli!” was the answer I got back
“What the-!?”
Quickly sitting up, I caused Pistachio to jump away in surprise- no, not Pistachio. It was a dog that I had never seen before.
“Lili! Pup, pup!”
It seemed excited at the fact that I had woken up, hopping up and down and wagging its tail. Was it hoping for a treat?
“Erm, why… who-? Where?”
I tried to stutter out an answer while wiping the saliva off my face, but I couldn’t seem to formulate any proper sentences.
“Uhhhh…”
Gingerly standing up, paying special heed as to not further disturb my migraine, I scanned my new environment.
One thing was for sure, I wasn’t in my neighbourhood anymore. Tall redwood trees surrounded me, with no signs of civilization in sight. The air was filled with foreign scents and noises that I couldn’t even begin to get a grasp on.
“Jeez, my autopilot went crazy this time.”
Joking to myself as I rubbed my head, I suddenly felt something moving along the top of my shoe. Thinking it was the dog from earlier trying to ask for a treat again, I looked down ready to admonish it-
It was a giant caterpillar. And it wasn’t just crawling on my foot. It was the size of my foot.
Letting out a giant yelp (definitely not a screech), I kicked my foot out reflexively, sending the green insect flying into a tree stump, and myself tumbling back to the ground. The impact hadn’t hurt my butt so much as my brain.
“^@$&!” I cursed in pain.
Trying to get up again, I felt something soft brush up against my arm. Thinking that it was another caterpillar, I jerked back in surprise.
“Pup-?”
“Ah… it’s just you…”
I was audibly panting from all the sudden excitement.
Feeling bad for the dog, I reached out with my left hand and began to pat it on the head. Thankfully, it didn’t bite or anything, and seemed to quite enjoy the attention.
“Phew, sorry for scaring you twice. I don’t see a collar on you, so I guess you’re a stray.”
“Lil?”
“Sorry, but I can’t take in any more dogs. Pistachio’s already a handful by himself. I could bring you to an animal shelter, but I’d have to register… actually, what breed are you anyway? You kinda look like a terrier, but…”
For the first time since waking up, I gave it a proper look up and down.
“You remind me a lot of this one Pokémon. What was it named again-?”
“Lillipup!”
“Yeah, that’s the one! Lillipup!”
“Pup, pup, Lilli!”
“Ahahaha-ha… huh.”
I rubbed my eyes trying to stave off the growing pain in my head.
“Come to think of it, that caterpillar from before…”
Turning back around to the tree stump that I had launched the bug at, I found that it was stuck on its back wriggling around, desperately trying to right itself.
“It kind of looks like…”
Picking up a stick with my left hand, I helped the disorientated caterpillar with getting back up on its feet.
Taking a closer look at the insect, I said to myself, “It really does look like a Caterpie.”
“CATERPIE!” It screeched back at me.
It suddenly shot some sort of white substance at me, perfectly sticking it across my eyes.
“GAH, WHAT THE- GROSS, GROSS, GROSS!!!”
I could feel that it was in fact something akin to spiderweb, but it didn’t make it any less disturbing to be blinded by it.
I tried to use both my hands to claw it off, but something made of metal bashed into my skull instead.
“Oof! What the-? Oh yeah, my can o’ beans!”
How had I not noticed that I was holding onto it with my right hand this entire time?
Finally managing to get the string off my face, I dazedly felt my head.
“Huh-? It doesn’t hurt anymore. Maybe me clonking it reset the pain...? I don’t really get it, but thank you chili caaaaaan-?”
Rather than holding what I thought was my evening dinner, was in fact a circular orb with two color palettes separated evenly by a blue line across the middle. The line was only interrupted by a single yellow button. The bottom half of the ball was a clear white, while the top half presented a bright yellow.
Sitting in my right hand was a Pokéball. An item used for catching Pokémon.
Wagging its tail waiting for more pets was a Lillipup. A Normal type Pokémon.
The caterpillar that had scampered off after firing a String Shot at me was a Caterpie. A Bug type Pokémon.
Blinking in astonishment, I looked up just in time to see a flock of Pidoves fly over my head. A Flying type Pokémon.
“Wait… So you’re telling me… I’ve been sent to an alternate world full of Pokémon!?!”