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I lived my live in broken family that located in padang, west sumatera, indonesia where when i was at 7-8 years old my father started to hit my mother.Then when i was 12 years old, my mother told me my father have been cheating and they will be divorced. At this time i have two brother who i almost fight with everyday altought i don't love them much, i still love them.
After being told this , i started to seperate from other and began playing internet starting with watching anime and reading manga or comic.
After a year i found hentai by accident while searching for manga and since then i learned to mastubrate and i can't seem to stop.
Perhaps this is my subconcious way of dealing with my parents divorce to delve into internet serching for interesting thing to deal with my boredom.
After a year from divorce all of my brother and a baby sister live with my mother .
At one time when i was at junior highschool. I saw a girl sitting in hall when my school have gathering with other school and instantly i fall in love with her. I slowly found she is from the other school at the same year as me and her name is jesica wijaya, i cound'nt bring my self to aproach her as i have been rejected by my first love since kindergarden and confesed when i was elemantary school this make me very afarid of rejection and content with watching her if i see her and smile as warm felling rose.
While my rejection with my first love make me felt dejected it didn't truly make me lose coinfidence but some of my bad physical charateristic does such as i always sneze multiple time at once, the most is 10 sneze at same time and usualy sneze 12 time a day . Smelly armpit , smelly fart and a loud one , and the most is my face hove some holes from acne atough small ones and my nose is full of black small dot while in my body some small acne grow.it trully make me lose coinfident.
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Then as my final year at junior highscholl, i became lazier and switched to reading various novel from japan, china, korea , etc and because my intelect is pretty good i pased above average and fortunately i got to a same highschool as jesica .Just as i overjoyed by this then i found out she already have a boyfriend named marvel carolus.
Perhaps just like my childhood way dealing with sadness and other negative emotion, i became more distant to other and focused on reading nove and as result of playing with my mobile phone and laptop too long i wear glasses now.
And If i have to compare betwen my father and mother , i love my mother more as she is always there for me and she felt like my best friend while my father only sometimes home altough he is the one that mostly planed if we want to go play outside of the house such as going to swiming pool, mall,traveling to other country but i can't be casual with him like a friend but i don't realy hate him. However lately i found how hyprocite he is always talking about other bad side while what he do is more bad than who he talked about, now i hate him but not too much just a little after all he is still my father.
Perhaps influenced by my father, I constantly have dark fantasy and read in internet almost everyone have one too and one of them is i hypnotise jesica to love me unconditionaly but not to yandere degree.perhaps it will always remain dark fantasy, perhaps not.
Now I am 16 years old and sit at 2nd year of my highschool live without anyone i can trully know as a friend maybe a friend in school but not outside of it. And curently i am in the same class as jesica and marvel altough i am happy watching her from my seat, iam still very jealouse of marvel. Maybe i shloudn't because while he put efort in geting jesica as her girlfriend, i dont .
My mother decided to go to her hometown Jakarta the capital of indonesia when i graduate from my highschool and one of my brother to graduate from his elementary school . After hearing this i wonder will i even see jesica again when i go to jakarta.
On unexpected day in aftersemester holiday where i mastubrate while seeing hentai manga and picture, i see a hentai picture where a man use a pokemon to control one of heroine to have sex with him. And i was thingking how good it is if i got this power then i wish for this power before i fall asleep. Unexpetedly i truly got this power after i waked up the next day