I followed Gemma for a while as she gave me the tour of the ship. She took me to the ‘Lost and Found’ which, contrary to my assumption, wasn’t a cardboard box with lost items, but rather, an enormous room filled with riches of all kinds, from piles of coin lying around like sacks of flour to pearl necklaces to rich paintings and clothes.

‘Is this your… treasure room?’ I asked, carefully wording the question. I didn’t know how touchy they were about being called thieves or plunderers.

She stared at me for a few seconds, giving me the ‘are you stupid?’ look, until she realized I was serious. She proceeded to burst into laughter, bending over and rolling on her side.

‘Just how old-school are you?’ she asked.

‘Clearly, much more than you’re used to,’ I said.

‘Nah, don’t sweat it,’ she said with another friendly tap to my butt-cheeks. I tried not to leer at her perky, exposed breasts, but she just smirked when she noticed me averting my gaze. ‘You’ll get used to us girls in no time.’

I turned around, looking for some clothes that would fit me. There was a chest in the corner with clothes overflowing from it that looked a lot less girly than the rest. I opened it and started rummaging through it, but then a thought started nagging me.

‘Emm… Gemma?’

‘Yes, your excellency Lord Banana Hammock the Third?’ she answered from behind a sheer dressing screen that defied explanation.

‘I was just wondering if these clothes came from other pirates, or ship crews, or…’

‘Other sweetcheeks like you?’

‘Ermm… yes.’

‘Well, if you’re worried about it, we don’t eat men.’

‘Whew. That’s a relief.’

‘Not whole, I mean. We may temporarily partake of parts of their anatomy, but they mostly make it back in one piece.’

‘Ha. Freaking. Ha.’

I heard clothes rustling and took my head out of the chest to see her walk out from behind the useless screen and straight into my line of sight. Contrary to what I had thought, she wasn’t putting on clothes. She had been taking them off. As I had thought, her body was light and supple, her perky breasts just part of a delightful package. My little sailor boy had already taken down the sails but now rushed back to hoist them anew.

‘I will find you clothes, don’t worry,’ she said as she put her hands around my neck and pushed my head down. ‘Afterwards.’

‘Is this the treatment I should expect from all the crew?’ I asked with a puzzled face as her breasts playfully slapped me.

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‘You got it, buddy.’

‘Why?’ I asked, pushing her away just enough. ‘Why is this an all female crew, and why are you so mad about me? I’m not a deluded fifteen-year-old. I’m an all-right looking young man, but nothing that special.’

She looked and me and pouted.

‘Oh, but you ARE very special, and so are we.’

I frowned.

‘All right, so you really want the whole story?’ she asked.

‘Yes, please.’

‘Fine. I’ll tell you. But you gotta pay the price. If you make me flap my tongue, I want to see you do the same.’

‘Fine,’ I said. Honestly, I was not that reluctant to engage with her.

I hoisted her up and made her sit on top of the huge chest, then I sank my head into her thighs. I didn’t like kneeling.

‘Mmm… that’s it, sweetcheeks…’

‘Hank,’ I said, interrupting my foraging.

‘Sweet Hank…. mmm…. ok, I’ll tell you about it. I’ll just use short sentences.’

‘Mmmhhmmm…’

‘This is an A.S.S., as the Captain told you. Mmm… no, that’s mine… yes. Ok. As she said, we’re the finest… ah… mapping ship around. We have an advantage no one’s figured out… yet. An all-girl crew. Others… other pirate ships just fight each other for plunder. We sail ahead of them and map the new quadrantOHMYGODTHERE…ahh….ahhh… ok, so where was I? Yes we sail ahead and map, and if we map a place, we get a percentage of all the riches mined and plundered and extracted there. Slower, please, yes… that’s it. So we don’t… ahhh… fight other crews, not if we can help it. Other ASSes are bigger or ahh…. deeper, deeper. But our strength is in speed and misdirection. We are always first because we’re faster, faster! Yes… yes… and smarter. But that means you can’t have… uhhh… men in the crew. They want to get into fights all the time, and their magic is offensive. Our girls girls girls ahhh mmm… they’re, we’re all focused on buffs and wind and speed and illusion. But a crew of all girl mages and engineers and sailors is hard to keep focused and out of each other’s tits. So we mmhhmmmmmmm yes… we … need someone to keep us focusing our energy in the right place and not on squabbling. And it can’t be anyone. We had some fights break out over mmmhmmm ah ahhh yes yes… mhhmmm over some boys who got too attached to one girl or another. We need an equal opportunity pleaser. Mmmm mm oh boy you’re good, old-school Haaaaaaaankkkkkkkkk aaaa aaaa aaaaa aaaa aaaaa aaa…………’

‘Well, my wife never complained…’ I said, coming out for air. ‘Well, that’s not true. She complained all the time. Just, not about this part.’

‘No, I bet she wouldn’t,’ she said, leaning over and kissing me on the forehead. ‘I think we’ll keep you,’ she said, jumping off the chest and diving behind the screen again.

‘But why only one man? Wouldn’t you want more men? You can’t expect one guy to…”

‘Can you imagine twenty men running around here getting into our pants? That would be too distracting, and they would think they should run the show, or whatever. No, just one good natured, girl-pleasing engineer should do the trick.’

‘You say it as if there have been a lot of them.’

‘Nah, just a couple since I joined,’ she said, coming out of the screen in a maid’s outfit. She blushed playfully and slid right next to me to open the chest and jump inside. ‘They’re hard to find, and hard to keep. You’ve seen the flood of wannabes we need to fight off. There are hardly real men arriving on these shores nowadays. The wannabes don’t work. They don’t know how to please a woman. They just want to please themselves. Aha! Here,’ she said, handing me a bundle of clothes.

‘This…’

‘I think it will be good for your ego. We don’t want to emasculate you, really. We need you to feel manly and strong. Come on, come on. I’ll help with the buckles.’

As she pushed me into the shirt and jacket, I started to feel like a pirate. I didn’t need an eyepatch, so we settled for a bandana. Then she took off my pants and after some jousting and foolishness, I managed to put them on. They were tight, but luckily they had strings to tie or untie the crotch part. Otherwise, my little sailor wouldn’t survive the waters he was about to face on this unique all-girl ship.