Sizzling on every table in Apo Carrie’s Apothecary was a bubbling cauldron on black steel. “Chop chop,” the buck-toothed professor said, clapping his hands on his tiny stool. “Remember what I told you to bring to class today—those dead withered dreams of yours.”
Janus and Mena both frowned. “Dang it to heck,” Mena swore. She had totally forgotten the first assignment of Dream Elixirs. She had spent all night seeing through her dark self or visiting Headmaster Stellaris, and that did not produce a dream husk when she woke up.
“Err…I don’t have mine,” Mena said, as the gopher-like professor waddled up to her.
“Can you get it from your room?” Professor Carrie lisped, observing her from his magnified spectacles.
Mena’s eyes brightened but then she went, “Oh nosy,” with her hands to her cheeks. Technically she didn’t have a dream because she didn’t dream last night. It was more of a vision through someone else’s head.
“Uhm…I lost mine,” Mena lied, looking down. Unfortunately, whenever anyone resided in the Dream Castle, they always had a dream, no matter what.
“Ah I see,” Professor Carrie responded, adjusting his glasses. “I’m sorry to tell you this, Miss Willow. But a big round toad egg for you.”
“Toad turds,” Mena sighed and she turned to Janus who didn’t have a dream either. “You too, Janus?”
“I’m exempt,” Janus said in her sweetest tone.
“Why?” Mena asked curiously.
“I never sleep,” Janus said with a wide smile and unblinking skeletal eyes.
“Great,” Mena pouted. “Remind me to be dead next time I want out of a class assignment.
“It works wonders” Janus said, her rigid pelvis settling onto her seat. “I’m never tardy because…”
“You’re already late,” Mena rolled her eyes and chuckled.
“That’s right,” Janus’ voice rose like a balloon. “I’m so happy that I have a friend who understands my morbid sense of humor.”
Professor Carrie rustled up his stool like a woodland critter. “Alright class…minus Misses Willow and Harvestar, of course. Our first class of the semester begins with a wonderful dream potion that you may find essential for the rest of your lives.”
Professor Carrie stood high upon his perch, his spectacles shining in the overhead candles. “Have you ever had a dream that was so good you wished you could have it twice? For instance, one where you finally moved out of your old potions dungeon and settled down with a beautiful woman who doesn’t think you’re some creep who smells like pickled beets?”
Professor Apo Carrie sighed as his buck tooth rested on his bottom lip. “I have that dream so much that I don’t need to recall it. But for the rest of you with looser minds, there is something called the Dream ReCall Elixir.”
There were some ‘whoas’ from the class, even from Mena herself who certainly wasn’t above reliving her most romantic fantasies, especially if they involved a shirtless Tal and a speedo.
Apo Carrie beamed over his awestruck class. “What does it take to make recalling dreams possible?”
He snapped his fingers and two of his enormous deposits swung open. A mysterious pink leaf hovered over his right hand, and an odd brain composed of thick grey matter hovered in the other. “In addition to your withered dream. You will need a leaf of a Dreamshade plant, for this will revive your dream…”
Apo Carrie nodded towards the brain. “A brain of a shadow helophant. For they never forget…”
This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there.
Apo Carrie snapped his fingers and both items flung themselves back into his deposit.
“Now,” he lisped. “I want you to proceed in an orderly fashion and…”
With a loud ‘eeeeeee’ most of the girls sprang onto their heels and charged over to the cabinets, scouring them for ingredients.
“Wowie zowie,” Mena said, looking stupefied at the commotion. “I guess I’m not the only one having foxy dreams lately.”
Mena pouted in her seat. It would have been nice to have her own Dream ReCall potion. Though… her nights were being interrupted by her dark self now so maybe it wasn’t a good idea.
Still, she could at least watch the other girls brewing their own potions, and maybe some other time she could brew her own or…
“Professor,” Mena asked, squirming in her seat. “Could I at least try to brew one without a dream…”
Apo Carrie lifted his glasses. “Hm, yes, but the assignment was to remember to bring your own dream, so this won’t count for your grade.”
Sheesh, Mena thought, but she nodded. “Ok.”
“Go ahead,” Apo Carrie said, gesturing over to the remnants of what was left in his cabinets. Mena walked over to the drawers. Besides all the other paraphernalia of guts, brains, eyes and roots, there was one remaining dreamshade leaf in the vegetation section, and one remaining helophant brain in the self-proclaimed Box O’ Brains.
She hurried over, juggling the ingredients in her hand, and dumped them into her cauldron. She hummed a merry tune for several minutes as the mixture turned to a swirly shade of grey and pink. She poured it into a beaker and marveled at hers, along with the rest of the class’s.
Theirs was tinted with the fabric of their replaying dreams, showcasing what had happened in their heads last night. Hers was mainly a colorful mixture that frothed and bubbled playfully.
“Presto-arrange-o!” Professor Carrie yelled. “Seems most of you’ve brewed up a storm. Even you Miss Willow.”
“I did?” Mena asked, her large eyes goggling curiously at her professor.
Professor Carrie nodded. “If it had a dream in it, it would be complete. As of now, it’s an incomplete potion.”
“Whoa,” Mena exclaimed with her hands to her cheeks. “Most potions blow up in my face. Can I keep this one to prove I’m not a questionable cook?”
“Sure,” Apo Carrie said. “It’s got nothing it but healthy nutrients for your brain, anyway.”
Professor Carrie hopped off his podium. “Speaking of brain enhancers, now for the history of this splendid potion.”
The class groaned, and Janus whispered, “This is the only time I wish I could sleep.”
Forty-five minutes of a dull lecture on the medicinal history of Dreamshade and Helophant brains passed before the class was interrupted. The door opened with a tentative creak and Professor Scalia Trident walked inside looking like a lost puppy.
“Excuse me,” she said with a murky look in her eyes. “I seem to have misplaced my classroom. Do you know where it is?”
Heads turned to Professor Apo Carrie, but his mouth had dropped open like a stunned rodent. “Homina homina homina” he said, ogling at the fish professor’s oceanic beauty.
Scalia seemed oblivious to his stuttering and gaping. With a sly look, Mena flickered her hand, stretching the rubber band around her professor’s wrist.
“Ow,” Scalia said, rubbing her slightly reddening fin when it snapped back. “Wait I remember—Room 1313! Thank you.”
She closed the door. Professor Carrie finally closed his jaw. His cheeks were as red as bricks. “What a fasthinating specithmen,” he lisped.
The bell chimed but Mena remained in her seat; her eyes glinted mischievously.
She knew how to raise her grade in Dream Elixirs up from a toad egg—it involved a bit of matchmaking between a human gopher and a guppy-brained sea creature.
Mena swaggered over to Professor Apo Carrie who had begun to mumble to himself. “Hey teach,” Mena said with half-lidded eyes. “Seems the Goddess of Love fired an arrow at your booty.”
Apo Carrie stopped muttering into his coat to look up at Mena. “Are you referring to that marvelous specimen of Fishysauz?”
“Why yes,” Mena answered. “Would you like to meet her?”
“Do you know that fine creature?” Carrie inquired with his magnified eyes.
As the gears turned in her head, Mena gave a broad grin. “I’ve got a direct hotline to her.”
“Oh yesssss,” Apo Carrie grabbed Mena’s hand and began to shake it frantically. Her thin arm struggling against his small but tenacious grip.
After a small bout of arm-shaking vertigo, Mena giggled. “There’s only one price. You must fix my grade. No more toad eggs.”
“Got it,” Professor Carrie said, rubbing his hands together. “Your grade is now a stick… followed by two toad eggs.”
“Huh?” Mena responded.
“A perfect HUNDRED!” Carrie exclaimed with his arms lifted towards the heavens. “Much like that sea creature!”
Mena began to prance happily in place. “Yay, my grade is saved!”—she flicked her fingers at Apo Carrie—"Good luck with meeting her, Romulus.”
Carrie was dancing so much he nearly fell off his stool. “This is sooo exciting. I cannot wait to study her up close. Oh, I better prepare…”
“You do that,” Mena said, giggling. “Pick out your finest lab coat and I’ll tell her about this handsome stud gopher that’s dying to meet her.”
”I’ll go polish up my microscope,” Carrie giggled to himself between snorts.
As Mena marched out, she knew that the LUV-Masta was on the job again…as long as she survived her after-school session with an emotionally turbulent phantom.