"Now, hence where does your mind look into, I wonder..." The voice whispered to Christian Ddraig as he descended into darkness.
"Where am I?" he thought as he awoke.
Looking around, all that he could see was an ever expanding and endless darkness. "Am I dead, is this the far lands, because if it is then I am asking for refund because this is false advertising, where is my paradise, l might be a bit edgy but I swear that total darkness and void isn't my idea of the perfect beyond the deathly vale experience."
"You know even in death your just as talkative as usual, and more annoying to boot," Ursa's voice echoed, either from around or for next to him, he couldn't quite tell.
But that mattered very little to him, she was here. He felt like celebrating but then the dark little thought slithered into his mind, " She must be dead as well, oh Leza why?"
"Ptss... Hello... Christian Ddraig if you are giving me the silent treatment so help Deus I am going to kill you... again," she snapped at him.
Even though she was scolding him the sound of relief could be heard in her voice and in a way it warmed Chris's heart to hear her relaxed and not at all panicking, they both needed this.
"Well, at the very least my delusions are behaving realistically... this time," Hamanymu's voice followed Ursa's from the perpetual darkness. " Which given the things said here, it has given me a retrospective on the types of friends I have and if I was truly ever sane in my life."
"How realistic are we talking here, because I would be expecting us to throw the mother of all unholy tantrums at the idea that it ended like this of all things." Chris had thought about death before, after all it was a fact that knights would have witnessed a lot of it in their line of work but to think that it happened so soon had been something which he avoided thinking about.
"Oh, I had my panic moment internally. It involved a lot of cursing, crying and a fair amount of begging for an auto resurrection just to get me out of this," Hamanymu answered with deep sigh. "But it turns out, you can't bargain with death apparently... I think that he is just salty that everyone likes life better."
"I just spent a good twenty minutes... I think trying to find the exit," Ursa added and with gravity attached to her voice he could tell that she was definitely serious about what she said.
"How did that work out for you?" the dripping sarcasm in Hamanymu's voice could be heard as clear as day.
"No results yet, but I am still checking."
"If you find it, be sure to let me know."
"Sure," Ursa replied with a playful chuckle.
Chris could not help but smirk at this little exchange, his friends were always the most colourful people he knew, even though Ursa tried to present a more straight man attitude she was just as crazy as they were when she thought no one was looking.
"You know, I wonder what my parents are thinking right now?" Ursa's voice was different now, rather than a playful tone, it was now mixed with barely held back sniffles.
" Probably thinking that their damn daughter should have listened to them when they told her to quit her stupid dangerous job," she continued and now it sounded like she was holding back a flood of tears. " I can't even remember the last time I visited them at their new home. I haven't even seen the place in a year."
Chris remembered Ursa's parents they weren't hostile to him in fact they very kind to him and Hamanymu. Though it was no secret that they were not too pleased with him for dragging their daughter into a dangerous profession of Knighthood and it hurt because Ursa's parents were like second parents to him and to have them be disappointed with him hurt, even though he couldn't blame them.
The last time he talked to Ursa's father the man had begged him to swear upon his life that he would make sure that their daughter returned alive after every mission.
"I failed my promise, I can't even show my face to tell them what happened because i am also dead, " that sounded more depressing than he thought it would.
"Then they can bond with mine over the same thing," Hamanymu added with a slight chuckle as he clearly tried to lighten the mood and cheer Ursa up.
"I just hope that none of them shall take a piss on my grave," Chris joined in on this gallows humour.
"I don't know about a piss, though my father will probably punch my corpse in the face as he yells at me." Hamanymu always had a way of trying to stay humorous for everyone else.
And it worked as they all burst into laughter, Chris began to think about something that had been in the back of his brain since they started talking about their respective families and it flowed out of his mouth." What about my parents."
The thought of his mother began to make him feel heavy and numb in his arms and legs. " My mother... Leza and Sophia above, I was such a childish and prideful fool."
"What?" Ursa asked him. "Chris, what's wrong?"
"She kept telling not to take dangerous missions or not to act reckless because it would kill me and now... I am dead, ain't fate a cruel and ironic mistress."
"Hey, you didn't mean to hurt her," Hamanymu tried to comfort him.
"Maybe I did," he never thought about it until now or maybe he never tried to think about it because he was afraid of the answer.
" I have tried so hard to put it behind for so long, but I can still feel her hands digging into my skin as she shoves her darkness into me, I still feel the darkness flowing into me as my bones broke, my muscles being torn into minced meat and my blood boiling... but none of it was as bad as that face... Leza, her dark eyes, her smile... she was enjoying it... I see it every time I look at her, maybe I am afraid that any second she will just be that monster, that thing that shall always be burned into my mind until the day I die... well I am already dead... What am I even trying to say?"
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A cold uncomfortable silence fell upon the whole of them. The darkness felt even more depressing and imposing, like it was a ocean of negativity that he was drowning in.
"... I know that they are as different from each other as anyone could expect but... I don't know, I have faced her so many times and I can still feel it inside me...fear, disgust...hate?"
Did he hate her. The light shade of his mother, the superwoman hero of his childhood who shared a place with the boogie man that haunted.
" I hated my mother so much for the actions of another being who wasn't her... I hated her so much that I actively rebelled against everything she told me and now I am dead... and my friends are dead.... I am horrible person," he rumbled on, unable to keep his words from flowing out of his mouth.
"No," Ursa's whisper met his ears. Though they were barely audible.
"Ursa you don't have to.." he wanted her to not grant him excuses or spend the rest of her eternity in denial about him, if it was an eternity they had.
"No!" her voice shook across the void and it shook him out of his skin. " You are a good person, and sure you're not perfect but you don't have to be. We care for you with all your charms and your damn flaws Ddraig... And... damn it I am okay for it to end like this with you my friends, my family... I have no regrets and I am just glad that I had a life with you guys !"
"I might not be a great speaker like Ursa," Hamanymu said as he cleared his throat to speak.
"But I share the same sentiment one hundred percent. we all agreed to do this job, to become knights knowing full well what would happen if we got unlucky one day and how we would have died and honestly I have always been afraid to go... I am shaking like a leaf right now, but with you idiots, I am not so afraid and if I was alone here, I would have the knowledge and memories of the wonderful friends I had to go with me. And that is good enough for me."
The warmth and comfort that he felt from their word's was like being cold and alone and then having being gifted a warm house, bed, food and companionship. He felt light and happy though a bit guilty because they were basically saying that they had no issues even though they dead because of his hubris.
"You guys know how to always make me feel better" he meant it honestly, maybe it was the strange dynamic of their relationship. Sometimes they tore at each other but in the end family is family.
"Of course we do," Hamanymu said sounding as smug as possible." Though you are a bit of a brooding man lately. It really kills the mood but you know what i mean."
"It does, doesn't it" he asked with a chuckle. He knew that he was quite likely to brood recently and that probably irritated his friends sometimes.
"Of course, more than you think but then again, to keep Hamanymu and Thor from being more crazy than usual, a added doss of brooding isn't so bad" Ursa answered teasing Hamanymu.
"Hey!!" the person she had mocked shouted back with mock offense. " I am also needed here to keep you less dull than usual."
Any person would have assumed those rather childish insults would be offensive to the poor person at the receiving end but instead it was just business as usual as between them and it all ended them laughing in the face of this great darkness for many minutes straight.
"Say?" Hamanymu asked. " Where is the road to the pearly gates anyway. I am kind of sick of looking at well... nothing"
"I don't know, maybe you can call them out." Chris answered as it finally occurred to him that they had been standing or floating in this lightless void for a how long he could not tell, but he knew that it was a long time.
"You two can't be serious?" Ursa asked them in exasperation.
"Well it can't hurt to try now can it," sure the logic of Chris argument was shaky but it worked.
"Sure thing," Hamanymu sounded as though he was deep thought over the particular matter before he decided to shout. " Hey heaven or far lands or whatever Chris and the rest of Avalon calls you. What gives here, we ain't got all eternity to just stand here... well we do, but I doubt that we can stand each other for that long with nothing interesting to do. I mean, we have to see new sights to see and meet new people to meet!"
Ursa's moan of irritation and frustration could be heard by them for what it was, a pure roll of the eyes conveyed by sound.
"Come on Ursa, we all know that you love us and wouldn't have it any other way," he teased her.
"Oh Ursa, I didn't know that you loved all of us in that way," Hamanymu joined in on the teasing.
"You guys are the worst," she shot back sounding flustered.
They would have sent back more witty retorts against each other had something not became visible into the darkness. It first began as a little spark of light in the distance, alone within the void but it was the most vibrant and eye catching thing in the everlasting darkness.
"What is that?" he asked watching as the light began to grow brighter and brighter pushing back the darkness like a wave of water would against the sand.
The light grew from the tiny spark until it was a great bright light equal to the sun blinding him as the darkness was banished or consumed by it. The light carried with it a warmth that calmed him instead of causing him panic as he felt he should.
The intense light lasted for minutes before it began to slowly tone down until Chris felt it safe to open his eyes.
Even a little foggy his eye's revealed before him a landscape that looked as if it pulled straight out of one of many fantastical paintings in the capitals gallery.
He stood upon a hill that overlooked a large flat land with a lash green vegetation and a city that composed large complex ivory white towery with a lake as a moat that reflected enough light that it appeared to made of a liquid crystal than water.
"Will you look at that, turns out that shouting worked out well after all." he heard Hamanymu's voice behind him. " So no pearly gates or streets of gold and emeralds in sight, what a rip off."
Chris twirled so fast he might have broken his neck from the sudden jerking motion. He saw his friends standing as confused as he was but their faces showed gladness from the chance to see each other.
"Now this is paradise," Ursa uttered as she stretched and yawned before she sat down feeling the grass and soft earth and Chris was tempted to join her in her relaxation.
"You are right, wouldn't mind staying here for all eternity," he whispered as he looked at the city.
"Um guys, what is that?" Hamanymu said pointing at the centre of hill they stood upon.
Chris followed his line of sights to something truly extraordinary, a figure in golden armor there. Their armor almost seemed to burn with a golden blaze beneath the rays of the sun.
The figure looked on to the north, his back facing them and in this world's unnatural silence, Chris could almost hear his breathing. Ursa and Hamanymu looked to him, unable to decide on what they should do next.
"Hello," Chris called out to the figure.
"I know you, don't I. You are so very familiar and yet I can't put my finger on it," the figure spoke and it was a man's voice. "Winters Knight, the Witch and the Scarlet Chaos."
Chris looked to Ursa and Hamanymu in confusion, he did not understand exactly what the man said and everyone looked at him in equal confusion.
"But you should not be here... unless," the man paused to think as if struck by some deep thought. "... the Shade."
"Who are you?" Ursa asked.
The responded with a slight chuckl before answering, "I am a friend... a good friend."
Suddenly a loud wailing sound began to echo across the air with such intensity that it felt like nails were being driven into Chris's ears. He fell to his knees with hands clasped over his ears to blot out the sound, but even then he could still hear it.
The world around them shook as the skies changed from the warm clear gold to dark inky purple. The loss of the light drowned everything into the darkness that had been before the light.
"Guys?!" he called for his friends "Guys!".
"I am here," Hamanymu answered clearly just as panicked.
"What's going on?" Ursa demanded.
"I don't know," he answered as a cold feeling rose up his spine with a sense of dread as he felt something watching him...was it from behind, was it from the front he couldn't tell but knew that it was there.
It felt very familiar like he knew it and this caused even more fear that his heartbeat was spiking. He wanted to speak but his voice had left him and all that remained was squeak. He wanted to close his eyes and wish it away as when was child but he felt the thing coming closer and closer to him and he felt like an injured animal trapped in a river watching a crocodile approaching it for the kill.
Just it got closer the darkness was torn from him and he awoke in a warm bed, under a roof with an open window illuminating soft light rays upon his body.
He studied his environment that appeared to be a room made from a grey stone with a wardrobe, a mirror, a wooden table and a pear of chairs.
He looked upon himself and realised that he was stripped of his old clothing and dressed in other cloths " These shirt and trousers, I left these back home".
The thought that he was home appeared but it couldn't be, this room looked nothing like his own or any from the palace and knowing his mother he would most likely be in the infirmary with her looking down on him and ready to tear him to shreds.
The door to the room opened and he tried to rise defensively but his bones and muscles lacked all strength and that left him bedridden. From the door something that he did not expect walked in, a purple creature that he suspected was a Mizihimo, though it had four arms and its golden mask was shaped to look like a bird.
This spirit glided across the ground as if it did not have feet and it neared the bed whistle speaking. "At long last, you are finally awake. You had worried for some time, what with your minds wondering to depths unknown."
"What... what are you talking about. Where aim I?" the young prince snapped as he leaped out of his bed, though his legs were heavy from exhaustion.
"Mind wondering..." the Mizihimo repeated the words as if expecting to instantly know their meaning. "...You know, mental projection... that is what you mortals call it now I presume. Though I was surprised with how easily you and the other two did it."
"The other two..." he paused as he remembered the others in his dream and he demanded "Hamanymu and Ursa, where are they?"
"Calm yourself young mortal, your allies are are under my protection. You have nothing to fear from me," the Mizihimo spoke with a knowing chuckle.
It waved one of its many hands hands and Chris watched as the room began to dissolve into a must which was blown away by strong wind. Chris soon found himself standing in an open field with hundreds of cabins built around a great bonfire.
What took his breath away was not the sight of hundreds of Avalonian soldiers resting by the cabins with Mizihimo very similar to the one that he met treating their wounds and serving them food. It was the dark skies in which five moons hang and millions of stars burned brightly than he had ever thought possible.
"I believe that a proper introduction is in order. My name is Mano-Nzelu and I would like to know how you managed to get so deep into the Shade or the spirit realm as you Mortals call it," the Mizihimo asked him and Chris could only look to the skies in silence.