“Peter! What was that?” Winter demanded as they stormed into the ship.

“Nothing. Shut up.”

“No! We’re not going to a single damn other place until you explain yourself!”

“What happened?” Tink asked as she flew by.

“Nothing! Set course for the second star to the right,” Peter spat as they made their way to the captain’s deck.

“No! Don’t set course for anywhere Tink! Not until he explains himself!”

“I don’t have to explain anything!”

“Why did he say you killed Wendy?” Silence erupted through the cabin.

“Sir, did you kill Wendy Darling?” Tink asked.

“Of course, I didn’t!”

“Then why do you get so upset about her?” Peter collapsed into his captain’s chair, grasping his fist together. “You cleared Tink’s memory, you look like you want to kill anyone who brings her up and I’m starting to wonder, if perhaps my life is in danger just hanging around you!”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Enlighten me then!” She waited for an answer, but Peter remained silent. “I’m sure I know what this is all about,” Winter laughed. “I should have picked up on it before. Such a stupid classic tale of woe.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Oh, come on. She probably just broke your heart or something stupid like that.”

“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” Peter jumped from his chair toward her.

‘You like her and she didn’t like you back? Tried taking her to Neverland to show how cool you are.”

“Stop it,” Peter said as he was getting more and more agitated with every word that came out of Winter’s mouth.

“But that never worked! It couldn’t make her fall in love with you, could it?”

“Winter,” he said under his breath.

“Oh, look at poor little Peter, can’t get over some Earth girl so now he fakes smiles and acts like everything is all cool because that’s how cool Peter always is!”

“Please,” Peter said as tears filled his eyes, waiting to be released.

“Did she find some other guy? Hmm? Some great guy who married her and wanted to settle down and have kids and it sprung the boy who won’t grow up to never get over it?”

“I killed her! Is that what you wanted!?” Peter yelled as he collapsed into a ball on the floor, letting his tears flood onto his cheeks. The whole room went cold for everyone. Smee was right, Winter thought. But she didn’t fear for her life. Peter may have spoken the truth, but she could sense it wasn’t the full truth.

“You…killed her?”

“It was all my fault,” Peter said, unable to control his breathing.

“What do you mean, it was all your fault?” Winter cautiously approached him. Winter was shaking has she approached him. Had she been with a murderer this whole time? Peter sobbed in silence, refusing to answer Winter. “Peter, I need to know what happened.”

“I only wanted to make her happy….”

1931:

Peter ruffled his hair. He always did this when he was nervous and anxious. He promised himself and Tink he wouldn’t do this, but he had to at least respond. It had been 4 Earth years since he spoke with Wendy. He had expected to hear from her again, but not this soon. Perhaps he didn’t end it as fully as he thought he did. She asked to meet him to take her away again. They would meet again in the open field they said goodbye in. Only this time, it would be forever.

It was sunset by the time he saw Wendy coming over the horizon. She looked frailer than ever, but as Peter gazed into her eyes, he could only see that young girl he had always known. “Peter!” she exclaimed as she rushed over to him. She dropped the one bag she had and gave him the biggest hug. Peter had to do everything possible not to return it. “Let’s get going, yeah?” Wendy said as she picked up her bag and pressed on toward the ship.

“Wendy, stop,” he said as he pulled her back toward him. “You’re not coming with me.”

“I don’t understand. You said we could get of here.” Peter couldn’t look her in the eye. “You lied to me?”

“It was the only way I knew would be able to talk to you.”

“That’s not true,” Wendy said as she tried to grasp the correct words. “We’re friends, we always can talk to each other and we’re always there for each other.”

“We both know that’s not true…” Peter looked her dead in the eye, hoping she would find the truth.

“Peter, I don’t understand where this is coming from.”

“It’s coming from you, for you. Wendy, I will never take you back to Neverland. You have to stay here and live your life.”

“I…I do! It’s just I thought it’d be great to get together.”

“Stop lying to me!” Peter yelled. He expected her to start crying, but a look of vengeance went across her face. “You only want to go to Neverland to escape your awful life.”

“That’s not true,” Wendy said through her teeth.

“The only times I hear from you now are when you’re tired and you want me to distract you. But then you realize I’m just a distraction and I’m taking you away from improving your life.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“And then you get angry and sad at yourself. You know it’s true. And I’m not going to be a pawn in your game anymore.”

“Peter, you’re being ridiculous.”

“You’re being ridiculous. Every time your life doesn’t go the way you wanted, you give up. And I’m not going to let you give up anymore.”

“Peter, don’t do this,” Wendy felt her hands turn into fists.

“I’m sorry, but you need to live your life here,” Peter kicked off his rocket boots and soared toward his ship.

“Peter! Peter!” Wendy yelled. A shadow of Peter drew upon Wendy’s face. “Peter! Don’t leave me! Peter!” Peter stayed staring at her for a few moments wondering if this was truly the best method for her. He could feel his whole body trembling, knowing this was goodbye forever. He flew into the cargo hold.

“Tink, take off,” Peter said quickly and firmly.

“Sir, are you sure?”

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“Take off!” The ship took off in the sunset. Peter looked out and saw that Wendy was still shouting at him, breaking down. Wendy collapsed into the ground and smashed the cold dirt with her fists. The ship took off, never to return to London again.

Until that fateful day.

Peter had just woken up haggard. It had been a late night. He stumbled into the cabin, prepared to start his day. He grabbed a bottle of whiskey to accompany him as he made his way.

“Sir, perhaps you shouldn’t start the day with that,” Tink said as she flew through the cabin.

“Perhaps one day I will, but until then…” Peter said right before he drank directly from the bottle.

“Where should we go today?”

“It’s been a while since I’ve seen June,” Peter offered.

“Probably not the best idea in your current state.” Peter couldn’t argue with her there.

“Maybe hit up the Lost Boys? Heard they just finished a job so they should be celebrating.”

“You are just filled with bad ideas this morning, aren’t you?” Peter grinned. He knew he was in a bad state, but he wanted to mellow in it, just for a few moments more. “Just let me be sad, Tink.” As Peter took another swig of his bottle, a message flew across the screen.

“A message just arrived for you, sir.”

“Let’s not answer anything for today, don’t you agree?” Peter waved her off.

“It’s from Wendy,” she said creating a silence throughout the Jolly Roger. Peter looked toward the screen at the message waiting to be opened. He thought about responding, giving her zero hope that he would come for her again, but didn’t think that would help. Cutting her off completely was essential for this to work.

“Leave it,” Peter said as he made his way to the cargo hold. In there, he found a work bench and started to do some necessary repairs to his rocket boots.

As if a switch flipped, he took his boots and smashed them several times on the work bench, ending with flinging them across the room. Even when they were galaxies away, she still had control over him.

Peter woke up the next day in a haze. The rest of the previous night had been a smudged memory in his brain consisting of self-loathing and alcohol. He continued his new morning routine of whiskey and waiting for something brilliant to happen when Tink flew in with a sense of urgency. “Sir, you need to read Wendy’s message.”

“Not if it was the last thing to do in the galaxy,” Peter shook his head. “It’s probably just another cry for help that would lead me to repeat the cycle. No one would benefit from that.”

“Sir,” Tink said with assertion, “I was the first one to alert you of my suspicion of Wendy’s behavior, but I truly believe this is different. Please, read it.”

Peter sighed acknowledging the truth Tink just spoke. She had never steered him wrong and had no reason to lie to him. He opened the message and found a much longer message than usual. He started reading reluctantly, hoping the pain of reading would quickly recede:

Peter, this will be the last time I write to you. I know you are probably dreading reading this, but I hope you do. I am truly sorry for how I treated you. I was angry because you were right. I always saw you as an escape, but now, I have to find an escape of my own. I will always treasure the memories we had together, even if some of them weren’t as happy as we’d like them to be. I wish our first adventure had never ended and we continued on through Neverland together. The stars were not in our favor this time around. You always said to me, ‘To live, would be an awfully big adventure.’ If only I had learned that earlier in my life. Time is chasing after all of us, Peter. And it has finally caught up to me. I’m sorry.

We’ll always have the window,

Wendy Darling

Peter finished reading, with his mind racing. He felt short of breath, and his chest was heavy. Tink noticed his symptoms, “Sir-”.

“Set course for Earth, immediately,” he said as he ran to prepare for an Earth landing.

When they arrived, the sun had just set. Peter flew on his rocket boots towards London, he didn’t care if anyone saw. He had Tink research cities near London and any clues where Wendy may have lived. After all these years, he had never learned exactly where she lived. The city crowd was dispersing when he arrived, preparing to go home to their families for dinner. “Does anyone know Wendy Darling?” he babbled through the crowd like a mad man. “Anyone!” he yelled as he was met with scoffed expressions.

He traveled door to door to anyone who would take his time, but was met with nothing. Second by second, he was getting more aggravated, unsure of where she may be. There was no way of finding out where she lived, but maybe that wasn’t where she was. He replayed Wendy’s message in his head trying to find any type of clue. And then it dawned on him. Throughout the years, they always had one simple place. The place where it all started.

Night had fallen and Peter soared through the skies of London until he found the rustic and damaged Darling Manor. It really had fallen a part to mass ruin since she sold it. He flew to the door and tried the knob and discovered it firmly locked. He banged several times, begging for it to be opened. “Wendy! Wendy!” he yelled in desperation. He thought about shooting it down when he looked up and noticed a small glimmer of light in the darkness of the sky. He walked over to investigate and noticed the giant window in Darling Manor was left open. How it was always left when Wendy had lived there.

He launched off into the moon illuminated sky, with optimism trailing through. He found a way in, all he had to do was find her. But as he reached the window, he got exactly what he asked for. His breath stopped and his stomach dropped. A silhouette grew over his face as he flew up to the window. A silhouette of Wendy, suspended in the air, waiting for someone to find her.

“We-…Wendy Darling?” he uttered as his rocket boots ceased to operate and he fell through the London sky with all thoughts and dreams emptying from his mind.

Present Day:

“I found out,” Peter explained to Winter, “that she had died that night. It was only a day for me, but after she sent that message, she waited an entire month. Hoping that I would come and help. The message was a cry for help, and I disregarded it, until it was too late.”

“Peter, I’m so sorry,” Winter uttered out.

“People can’t live in two worlds, Winter. That’s why I don’t want you to fall in love with this place. You can’t end up like her. I made that mistake already, twice.”

“Twice?”

“There was another who left here to go over there. His name was Tootles, but he couldn’t manage. By the time I had found out, due to the time difference, I was too late. He was already an old man.” Winter’s mind flashed to the old man Peter was with when she had initially met him. “Our worlds are so different, that he couldn’t manage. Age hit him harder, and brought him to madness as well,” Peter sniffled. “That’s why I don’t want anyone coming here or going over there. Their minds can’t handle it.”

“Would it be such a bad idea to just combine them, then?” Winter offered. Peter shook his head.

“Earth is special, and needs to be preserved the way it is.”

“I think you’re looking at Earth with rose colored glasses, Peter. It’s not as great as you think it is. I know you tout that it’s all survival here, but there’s wars back there as well.”

“No place is perfect, but Earth is so much more than you think,” Peter said as a cheerful smile grew throughout his face. “Neverland is all war and survival, that’s all anyone cares about. And sure, there may be aspects of that, but on Earth there’s something that any being in Neverland could never understand, and that’s passion. People love to do things, just simply because they want to do them. I’ve seen things that no one would be able to comprehend here. One time, there was this guy who created such an amazing car, just because he loved it. I’ve seen a woman create an entire concert in a park, just using her violin. I’ve seen people create love, just to share it with the world.”

Winter thought of her mother and father as Peter explained his love for Earth. She grew up in a time of privilege compared to Neverland. She had created art, but didn’t understand how great it was to experience that. “But people lose sight of that,” Peter continued. “They don’t realize the cards of life they’ve been dealt.” Winter couldn’t help but think Peter was talking about herself. “And I just wish people would know, just how beautiful their lives are.”

Tears were falling down both of their faces now. Peter looked cheerful, reminiscing on his beautiful times on Earth, where Winter drew a look of shame. He had been trying to teach her this since they had first met, and now clarity had filled her mind with how she had to live.

“So, I protect it. Every way I can. Making sure nothing can taint it. But I try to bring a part of Earth with me.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I tried bringing parts of Earth here, but none of them stuck, except that book Wendy wrote.”

“I think you mean J.M.-” Winter began.

“He may have published it, but it was Wendy’s story,” he clarified. “All of Neverland clung to this tale like I had never seen before. With their lives filled with only survival and death, they clung on to optimism. They loved the tale of the happy go lucky kid who never uttered a sense of sadness. As if hope actually existed in a different life. That’s who I was, but now, I’ve had to learn to play him. Because that happy, funny, kid, died with Wendy. But I can’t let anyone know that. Because the hope dies with it.”

“Peter, you can’t expect to stay the same. Death changes people. We’re never the same person all throughout our life.”

“I can’t let anyone know that,” Peter sobbed. “It will ruin everything I’ve done.” Winter placed her arm on Peter, they looked at each other, each experiencing the same kind of sorrow.

“It’s okay to change. It’s okay to, grow up, it’s kind of impossible” she said managing a smile. Memories of her mother flashed through her memory as Peter thought about Wendy. “But you have to remember who you were and keep that person close to you. Keep that person with you wherever you go, and live for that memory of them.” Peter accomplished a smile at her. “At least, that’s what I’m going to do. And I hope you do too.”

“If only I tried hard enough,” Peter said between gasps of air.

Tink floated by, trying not to disrupt them. “Sorry, but we’re approaching the second star to the right,” she explained. Peter wiped off his tears and got up. He looked down at Winter and offered her a helping hand as she got up.

“Have all arrangements been made?” he asked Tink.

“Should be ready when we are.”

“Perfect, just how I like it!” he said, putting on a mask of happiness as he marched forward.

“Peter?” Wendy asked stopping him in his tracks. “It wasn’t your fault.” Peter turned and gave her a smile without teeth and then pressed on to the task at hand.