As the boy, Yaalon, got himself cornered by five swordsmen in menacing silver armors, Yaalon took out an object from his pocket.

‘A spoon?’ questioned one of the swordsmen.

‘He plans to fight us with a spoon!’ shouted another before bursting into laughter.

‘He could’ve carried a knife, but instead it’s a spoon!’ mocked and laughed the other; and the rest followed suit.

At the light-hearted atmosphere, it was as if the tension had loosened at the sight of the spoon. However, the minds of those men weren’t so easily changed.

After wiping his tears, one of the swordsmen stepped forward. He raised his sword with both his hands—and swung it down at the boy like a falling guillotine.

Yaalon, with his light feet, stepped to the side to dodge. The sword scraped the ground and erupted dirt, stuck. Not missing the chance, Yaalon pressed onward and tapped his spoon onto the man’s armor plate.

Ting… the sound vibrated in the air.

‘Ha!’ This feat earned Yaalon another fit of laughter from the swordsmen who were spectating.

The swordsman’s upper body—who got hit by the spoon—began to slide down and fell to the ground, leaving only the lower body standing. The boisterous laughter had immediately died, replaced by a silent immense shock filled with terror. Their companion was cut clean by a spoon.

‘He’s an exploiter!!’ shouted one of them.

‘Run! Run!!’ shouted another. The four of them scrambled away and soon disappeared.

Yaalon was left alone. He pocketed his spoon; and, not wanting to deal with the dead body, began running away.

*

PATCHWORLD

Chapter 0 – The Beauty of Exploit

*

Evera, an elven woman with sky-blue hair, stared at the paper in her hand.

A boy with a spoon exploit… She read the words.

‘Evera!’ An eye-patched man, Alydar the guild master, slammed both his hands on the table. He glared at her with his good eye. ‘Are you listening?’

Evera still had her eyes on the paper. ‘I am.’

‘What did he say, then?’ Vane, an old man who wore a mithril armor plate to a meeting, the guild vice-master, asked.

Evera let out a sigh and put down her paper. ‘Our guild, Stormlight, is engaged in a war against a dark guild, Skullthief, and we’re losing, our members dying, because they have an exploiter on their side. An exploiter who claims that he’s from Whimsy, the famous; exclusive party of exploiters.’

Alydar and Vane had heard enough from her. Thus, the meeting was continued.

‘I need ideas,’ Alydar requested. ‘A form of countermeasure against the exploiter. I’ve reported the exploit to the church, but before a new patch comes up to fix the exploit, many of our members will die if we do nothing.’

‘We need to stall until a new patch comes up,’ Vane proposed.

Stupid, Evera thought. ‘No. We need to deal with the exploiter ourselves.’

Her statement earned her stares from Alydar and Vane.

‘How exactly?’ Vane asked.

‘I know someone.’ Evera’s blue eyes went to her paper. ‘He happens to love exploits.’

*

‘Ha-choo!’ Yaalon sneezed. ‘Did I get a cold somewhere…’

He looked at the jacket wrapped on his waist and considered wearing it; but was distracted by the sound of shaken grains. Nearby, there was a stall which sold kobold’s meat, and the shopkeeper was powdering the grilled meat with violent-looking pepper.

The smell made Yaalon’s mouth water.

‘Shop-keep,’ he approached the stall, ‘how much is for one?’

‘It’s not for kiddies who’re growing,’ grumbled the shopkeeper, shooing him. ‘The spices can and will halt your growth.’

‘Oh, come on. Pleaseee?’

‘Go away, kid. I’m not selling to anyone who’s under eighteen.’

‘But I’m… eighteen! I’m eighteen!’

‘Sure. Why don’t you show me your status then? You can’t fake the thing.’

Yaalon snapped his fingers and brought up his status panel: a rectangular sheet floating mid-air.

Name : Brate

Gender : Female

Age : 12

Title : Good girl

Race : Human

Class :

Affiliation :

Brate? he tilted his head. Oh. It’s from the time when I disguised myself.

‘You can’t show me your status, can you?’ said the shopkeeper.

‘… I can.’ Yaalon grabbed the status panel like a weightless thin slate and showed it to the shopkeeper. The man inspected the status with a raised eyebrow.

Name : Brate

Gender : Female

Age : 18

Title : Good girl

Race : Human

Stolen story; please report.

Class :

Affiliation :

He still doubted him.

Yaalon shrugged and smiled. ‘Hey, you said it yourself. I can’t fake the thing.’

His status panel in the shopkeeper’s hand faded into non-existence. ‘Very well, I apologize for treating you like a child, young… miss…’ He picked up a stick of kobold’s meat from the grill. ‘It’ll be twenty bronze or two silver.’

Yaalon reached into his pocket, but an elven lady showed up beside him.

‘I’ll pay for him.’ Evera gave the shopkeeper two silver.

‘Her, you mean,’ the man corrected as he received the money and handed the kobold’s meat.

Evera glanced at Yaalon. ‘Yes, her…’

She kept the stick of meat and walked away. Wanting his food, Yaalon followed her.

‘You’re helping me out,’ Evera said.

‘Pass.’ Yaalon didn’t even consider. He reached for his stick of meat, but Evera raised her hand.

‘People are talking about a boy with a spoon exploit. I’ve helped you by assigning people to quell the rumors.’

‘Thank you, but I didn’t ask for the help. Can you hand me my food now?’ Yaalon jumped, but Evera raised her hand higher.

‘You’re helping me deal—’

‘Ugh…’

‘—with an exploiter—’

‘Huh.’

‘—from Whimsy.’

‘Alright, I’m in.’ He didn’t ask for details.

After the confirmation, Evera let Yaalon snatch the stick of spicy kobold’s meat from her hand. When he took a bite, he breathed fire from the spice.

*

The bouncer, a man of bulk stature, looked at Yaalon’s status panel with a doubtful stare. Reluctantly, he had to accept what the status panel stated and let Yaalon and Evera into the bar.

‘Why is your gender female?’ complained Evera, a song sung by a bard muffled her voice.

‘Too lazy to change it back,’ said Yaalon. They both spotted an empty table and sat down there. ‘Anyway, you haven’t filled me in on the details. You’re not usually mysterious.’

‘And you’re not usually willing to engage in vague matters,’ Evera said back. A waiter came to their table; and she immediately dismissed him by ordering two tankards of ale. ‘I noticed that instead of the exploit, you’re interested in Whimsy. What’s with that?’

‘I’m searching for them.’ The waiter immediately returned, dropped two tankards, and was shooed by Evera. ‘Is it really someone from Whimsy?’

‘Could be.’ Evera shrugged slightly, then pushed her ale away. ‘What’s for certain is that you’re dealing with an exploiter.’

‘With what exploit?’

‘Invincibility.’

‘What kind? You sure it is an exploit and not a feature?’

‘Our veteran guild members who survived claimed that nothing works on the exploiter. Any attacks: physical or magical, of any variety, did not work.’

‘… Sounds interesting. Where’s this exploiter exactly?’ Yaalon looked around; there were many people in that bar.

‘According to the profile I got, it should be that guy over there.’ Evera’s stare guided Yaalon’s. At a table with a couch was a gray-skinned man surrounded by ladies.

‘Yeah, that person is definitely not from Whimsy.’

‘Could be in disguise.’

‘… Perhaps.’ Yaalon hopped down from his seat and began walking toward the man. This earned him protests from Evera, but Yaalon turned a deaf ear. He had a smile on his face and hummed a melody as he approached the man.

Presenting himself in front of the exploiter, a boy with a jacket wrapped on his waist, the man tilted his head up. ‘Who lets a child in here? Go away, brat.’

Let’s see that invincibility, shall we? Yaalon thought.

He aimed his palm at the man and a red magic circle began animating. Yaalon began with the most basic of magic attacks: fireball. A swirling ball of fire came into existence and traveled toward the man, in which he dodged by jumping away. Yaalon’s magic burned the couch, but the ladies were unharmed.

Screams erupted and customers began leaving.

‘You’re supposed to be invincible,’ Yaalon said, ‘yet, why did you dodge?’

The air surrounding the man’s hand warped; and he pulled out a knife from his storage, which he held with a reversed grip. ‘You’re—from Stormlight,’ he concluded. ‘I’ve killed many of you, yet the guild doesn’t know when to give up!’

Without a care, Yaalon aimed his palm at him, again a red magic circle animated, and he unleashed a fireball. This time, the man didn’t dodge, and when the fireball hit, it caused no damage.

The man wore a smug smile, which faded away as he saw Yaalon’s grin of interest.

‘Imbecile…’ he said.

The man dashed toward Yaalon with a knife in his hand. At the sight of the assault, Yaalon was calm, and used appraisal to see his opponent’s status.

Name : Lestre

Gender : Male

Age : 29

Title : Bloody Blade

Race : Human

Class : Thief

Affiliation : Skullthief

After having a good view, Yaalon dodged Lestre’s knife by stepping to the side.

While at it, Yaalon grabbed a bottle of beer from a nearby table and threw it at his opponent. When the glass bottle touched Lestre’s forehead, it bounced upon contact; in a trajectory that didn’t abide by the law of physics. A glitch. Yaalon didn’t miss that observation.

As Yaalon dodged another of his opponent’s slash. Then, he used fireball in response, and a red magic circle began animating. This time he aimed it at the roof of the bar instead of his opponent. As the fireball blasted upward, it caused no damage to the roof.

Yaalon pulled back his head to dodge a horizontal slash.

‘You’re… boring,’ Yaalon said, looking down on his opponent. ‘You stole my stats until it went below zero, didn’t you?’

Lestre’s movement stopped after hearing his words.

‘Thief class has “stats steal” skill,' Yaalon said. ‘According to the mastery level, there is a limit to how much you can steal, and you can’t turn people’s status below one. But it seems you found a bug that allowed you to do that. You’re not invincible; it’s just that my attacks are doing no damage. And because the world system does not recognize minus stats, the attacks glitch out.’

Lestre gulped. ‘So, you found out. But what of it? You’ll die here.’

‘The reason you dodged my first fireball—is because you needed time to steal my stats. Surprise attacks work on you.’

Behind Lestre, Evera had gotten her sword out of her storage, and swung the slim blade at his neck. She had been waiting for her chance, and only struck after hearing Yaalon’s words. However, the sword couldn’t cut his skin.

‘Fools!’ Lestre shouted. He then hit Evera hard with the back of his hand and she stumbled to the ground. ‘Do you really think that I wouldn’t notice her? None of you stand a chance against me! I’m invincible!’

‘… You don’t understand the beauty of exploit,’ Yaalon said with a calm voice, undisturbed by his opponent. ‘Exploit—is a challenge. A battle against the Creator who made the world system. A method that could allow you to do things beyond the norm.

‘Yet here you are… You didn’t bother disguising your exploit, didn’t bother exploring it, didn’t bother searching for its weakness. You’re just someone who’s drunk on an exploit you found by accident and that’s all there is to it. Boring.’

‘What of it?’ Lestre’s blood vessels surfaced on his forehead. ‘You’re still dying here!’ he dashed at Yaalon.

Yaalon sighed. ‘To think someone like you fake yourself as Whimsy…’ Yaalon pulled out a spoon from his pocket. ‘Talk about causing a bad image to the party I made…’

Yaalon dodged the knife swing by ducking; then hit Lestre with his spoon.

The spoon made a perfect cut and sliced Lestre into two.

‘H-How?’ he said before his upper body fell to the ground.

Yaalon looked at his spoon. ‘It seems that you can’t steal stats into a negative when my spoon has infinite sharpness.’

*

Name : Yaalon

Gender : Male

Age : ???

Title : Damned Exploiter Stop Exploiting the World System and Causing Me Trou-

Race : Human

Class :

Affiliation : Whimsy (leader)

*

‘I’m searching for Whimsy because I have a big exploit in mind,’ Yaalon explained to Evera as they were far from the bar.

‘What exploit?’ Evera asked. She pressed ice on her cheek.

‘I’m only telling once I get enough people on board. Do you know where I could find them?’

‘… Count me in, then I’ll help.’

‘You’re interested in exploit? That’s new.’

‘I need a better grasp of exploits in case this happens again.’

‘… Welcome to Whimsy then.’