The glimmer of firelight danced across the surface of the pool as Alter crouched and peered intently at his reflection. The face staring back at him was his own, there was no doubt. But something was off, little differences a stranger or loose acquaintance could never hope to notice. With a curious finger he poked and prodded at the contours of his features. The little patch of skin on the underside of his jaw which, for some reason, his beard had always refused to tread was now equally coated in the small back and amber hairs. His right eyelid had always been slightly less open, now it perfectly matched his left. Any skin blemishes had disappeared, even the dark patches under his eyes were gone. It was him, but altered. Idealised. Combine that with the fact that his physique had been improved a dozen times over and Alter couldn’t help but wonder how much of the true ‘him’ remained. He felt like an artist’s rendition of himself, and this artist was not above using a little Photoshop.

He tore his eyes away from the reflection. Narcissus would not claim him tonight, novel as the idea might be. Most of the group had bedded down for the night around the fire, though there were still some quiet conversations being held and a couple of people were still up and moving. The slight form of Chloe could be seen rummaging through one of Pinecone’s saddlebags for some unknown purpose. Riptide had been making his rounds for the last thirty minutes, holding quiet discussions with each of the squad members as he got a feeling for how everyone was doing. Alter was sure he’d hear all about that soon enough, along with having to field his own suite of questions.

Treading carefully to avoid disturbing anyone, Alter moved away from the rough camp and found himself a suitable rock to act as a chair for a while. This time his eyes strayed upward and he quickly found himself drowning in the vast canvas of the night sky. He had spent almost his entire life in suburban europe, the constant light pollution had always hidden the majority of the sky’s beauty. Here though, in this strange new world there was no such blockage. It was like stepping into a sci-fi movie backdrop. Stars immeasurable twinkled and glinted through a veil of pale white galactic tendrils. The sight left him both speechless and feeling incredibly small, you could spend an entire year staring and still spot new points of light hidden within the cosmos. A curious thought surfaced and he oriented himself to look northward, searching the sky again. If this was the same world he’d woken up on this morning then certain features would still exist. The north star should be fairly easy to spot and sure enough a noticeably brighter light was present. Then again, he couldn’t call himself confident on this topic. His knowledge of the stars and constellations was limited to playing the Muppet Treasure Island point and click adventure game back when he was six. That knowledge was long lost, the only one he could remember was Orion’s belt and that was only because it was three stars in a row. The sky was bloody packed with three stars in a row.

“Having fun?” Riptide asked as he wandered into sight.

“Just a little stargazing. It’s … pretty amazing. Existentially terrifying when you think about it, but in a beautiful way.” Alter sighed.

“I’ll take your word for it. Looking at it just makes my head hurt.”

“Well then don’t hurt yourself on my account. I’m guessing you’re here to grill me on my mental health?”

“In a moment. We should probably go through everyone else first.”

“Fair enough. By the numbers then, let’s hear it.”

“As a whole I don’t think the group is doing too badly. The fact that we bumped into Oliver and Lucille, plus the way that they’ve been able to give us some direction has been a great help. Imagine how they’d be feeling if we’d just spent the whole day wandering around seeing no one.”

“I dread to think, there would’ve been fist fights by dinnertime. Let’s not waste energy on that though, how’s Booze doing?”

“Pretty well, I’d certainly say he’s one of the most stable right now. I mean, he’s sort of living a dream in a way. Yes he’s away from his family but he gets to be a proper medic and he’s relishing the challenge. He’d mentioned in passing that he applied to medical school a few years back but hadn’t managed to pass the entrance examinations, the info in his head’s still good though. I don’t want to imply that it was a good thing that Lucille was injured, but having a patient to look after, successfully I might add, has really boosted his confidence.”

Alter nodded at the assessment. Marcus was certainly one of their calmer heads, marry that to a strong sense of responsibility and you’ve got one valuable team member.

“Boats is doing alright, I think. He’s keeping his cards close to his chest but that’s nothing new. He sees this as his job, and he’ll do his job. So long as we can keep making progress and avoid any stupid mistakes we won’t hear any dissent from him.”

Alter’s real world knowledge of the Scotsman was limited at best in that he knew four things. He lives in Dundee, he likes boats, his real name is Kevin and he hates using it. Alter had known him for five years and he’d never been comfortable with other people saying his name or asking him about his life. He hoped that maybe now they had all met each other Boats would become comfortable enough around them to open up a little more. However, that would take time and Alter wasn’t going to try and force him into anything he didn’t want to do.

This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it.

“Pavejack is a bit skittish but he’s putting on a brave face. We both know the brash visage he puts up cracks easily and some events from today have left him jittery but I don’t think we need to be immediately concerned. That said, tonight’s going to be hard on him. I don’t think the fact that he’s not going to wake up in his own bedroom has properly settled in yet.”

“I’ll keep an eye on him. I think Chloe seems to be helping inadvertently though, doesn’t he have a sister her age?”

“Yeah, Lauren’s her name I think. He’s been in big brother protection mode ever since we busted her out. I suppose I’m more worried about him because of the age difference, he’s just a college kid you know? He hasn’t seen much of the wider world.”

“He’ll pull through, Peter’s already taken him under his wing.”

“Speaking of Peter, he says that he’s fine. He isn’t. The man is on so much edge that I could use his breath as a razor.” Riptide shifted uncomfortably, eyes straying back to the fire as if to check he wasn’t being overheard.

“Well he did witness one of his close friends get a surprise introduction to the wooden postal service.” Alter remarked dryly. “He was worried that we’re going to end up on a powertrip and forget about making it home. Given how much combat we’ve seen on day one, I’m not surprised he’s pent up.”

“What do we do then?”

“Other than not getting carried away? We keep a clear sense of direction, work on our objectives whenever they appear and do our best to get everyone home. He’ll see that we’re on the right track.”

“You still haven’t told everyone about the objective update you know.”

“Tomorrow. I’ll tell them tomorrow, it’ll give them some good news to wake up with.”

“Right. Moving on, Whim is doing alright despite his injury. I mean that’s not a surprise, I could nuke the man’s toaster and he’d still have a stupid grin on his face. It’s all one big adventure for him, I’ll wager he’ll be bragging about the lump in the morning.”

Alter smiled, if he had to pick one person who could keep a sunny disposition through a life changing event it would be Whim.

“Finally there’s Vangroover. Harry. I feel sorry for the guy really, we’ve known him for what, two weeks? He’s keeping it together well but the guy’s practically among strangers. I don’t know enough about him to make more of a judgement than that.”

“He seems to have a good head on his shoulders. Hopefully he’ll feel confident enough to speak a little more soon.”

“And that just leaves you.” Riptide moved across and sat next to him. “How’re you doing man? This has been a lot for you to take on.”

“I appreciate the concern. Honestly, I’m holding together pretty well.” Alter smiled.

“For how long though? I know you Luke, you get anxious when you don’t have the answers. We’ve both seen how quickly you can start spiralling if you’re left alone with those kinds of thoughts.” Riptide’s voice was gentle but concerned.

Alter conceded that his friend’s words held an unfortunate truth. There had been times over the last decade where he had struggled with his mental health, particularly during periods of uncertainty.

“It’s weird. I think the fact that I’ve got so few answers is actually keeping me grounded. There’s too much to think about for me to actually stop and think, does that make sense?”

“Sure, so long as this isn’t some weird deflection.” Riptide shrugged.

“Mate. I’m alright.” Alter insisted.

“Then I’m not going to chase it further. Just don’t be afraid to talk, alright? I know your love of self-burdening.”

“And what about you?”

“Me?” Riptide paused to consider for a moment. “I’m doing great, amazing even! This is the best I’ve felt for years.” He grinned.

Alter wasn’t surprised by this response. Riptide had been suffering in the real world, there was no getting around that. He’d been hospitalised for over a month during the peak of the covid pandemic and never truly recovered. Long Covid was the diagnosis, and it had sawn his friend’s life in half. He didn’t have the energy anymore, hell there were some days where he couldn’t make it out the door. Fortunately he could work from home but as the months went by everyone could see the strain it was putting on him. His parents had helped for a while but after a couple of weeks that goodwill had dwindled to almost nothing. He was alone.

“Look at me, I’m back to my old self. I can run again, I can climb again. It’s like a whole new life and I get to spend it doing cool military shit with my best friends. This … this is as close to heaven as I’m ever going to get.” He admitted with exhilaration.

“Hugo.” Alter murmured, taken aback by the sudden confession.

“Don’t call me that name. Please. I don’t want to be him anymore. I don’t want to go back to that shitty flat and shitty family. I don’t want to feel weak again.” Riptide’s voice quietened at the mention of his old life, his eyes looking at Alter pleadingly.

“I’m sorry. I was just a little surprised.”

“It’s ok.”

The two men sat in silence for a while. Alter was mature enough to know that his friend wasn’t angry at him, but the quiet was a little unnerving.

“Well, I’m going to get some sleep. Enjoy your watch, oh fearless leader.” Riptide gave him a dramatic bow and began walking towards the fire.

“Fine, leave me to my fate, why don’t you.” Alter chuckled and settled in for his vigil.

At least the stars would keep him company.