Novels2Search

Chapter 30

Jack wasn't sure where he was at the moment. The best way to describe his location would be to call it 'nondescript.' There was no light, but he could see clearly. There was no ground, yet he was neither floating nor falling. It was the single most boring place he'd ever been.

At first, he tried struggling. Climbing, walking, running, and crawling all had the same effect, which is to say nothing. After that failure, he tried focusing his mind to see if that would impact the world around him. It didn't. He tried yelling, waiting, challenging God, or whoever might be listening, and even giving up. It all had the same effect, nothing.

Once in a while, he'd hear Angela, S'haar, or Em'brel speaking to him, though their voices seemed distant. It was hard to focus his attention on their words. It was like his mind kept slipping through the words. He'd catch bits and pieces, but it was virtually impossible to put it together coherently. Still, he took comfort in their presence even if he couldn't see, feel, or understand them.

Eventually, they would leave, and he'd be alone again. Not that he blamed them, there was probably a lot to do now that he was stuck... wherever he was. That being said, Jack still looked forward to the times when their voices would return. Those were the best times this nondescript place had to offer.

He'd been sitting alone for a while when he heard S'haar's voice again. "Hello."

The voice was crystal clear, and Jack understood it perfectly, but his mind distorted the tone of her voice. It echoed through the void, somehow sounding both masculine and feminine.

Jack tried to relax and open his mind to better focus on her words when she spoke again. This time her voice had an edge of impatience to it. "Are you going to lay there and dream all day, or are you going to sit up and speak with your guest?"

That snapped Jack's eyes open. He sat up to stare at the argu'n standing before him. Looking at him/her/it, Jack would only describe his guest as the ideal argu'n. That's not to say that he/she/it was Jack's ideal version of an argu'n, but rather that the entity fit Plato's description of an abstract ideal of a physical object.

Plato once explained that a person could look at any tree and understand it to be a tree despite the variety in appearances. He argued that there must be an abstract ideal of every object that our minds would use as a template to recognize any physical object that fits within that template. For instance, a person can intuitively recognize the differences between plates, bowls, and cups despite each one appearing to be only slightly different from the others. By his own logic, the ideal version of any object couldn't physically exist because if it became real, it would become too constrained by reality to remain the ideal version of itself.

Despite that, before Jack stood the perfect ideal of an argu'n. The entity was stable and unchanging and yet seemed to shift from male to female, depending more on Jack's perception at the moment than any physical characteristic. When looking into the entity's face, he saw the faces of every argu'n Jack had ever known, and many more he'd never met, despite the face never changing in any tangible way.

Jack tilted his head to the side and scratched his hair as he spoke. "Huh, so the lack of input or interaction had finally broken my mind, and I've started hallucinating, great..."

The entity tilted it's head to the side, mimicking Jack's as it responded. "I have memories going back eons before your ancestors learned to strap a rock onto a stick. But maybe you are right, and I only exist as a fractured portion of your mind. Perhaps when you finally die or wake up, I'll simply pop out of existence. Wouldn't that be interesting?"

Jack raised an eyebrow at the combination of amusement and patronization in his guest's voice. He crossed his arms as he retorted. "So, what are you supposed to be? A god of the argu'n? Which one are you? The god of light? Or maybe the god of war? What about the harvest, fertility, the seas, or maybe death? Stop me If I'm getting warm."

A warm, welcoming smile appeared on the mother's face as she beamed down at the child before her. "You are indeed very warm child. I am the goddess of fertility!"

Leaning in closer, her smile shifted to a seductive smile, and her voice purred with longing for her lover, barely an icy whisper in his ear. "And the god of death..."

Jack leaned back a little to distance himself from him/her/it. He wasn't thrilled with the effect her voice had had on him. He responded with the most defensive weapon he had in his arsenal. A witty quip. "Goddess of life and death? Isn't that a conflict of interest?"

His guest summoned a chair out of the mist that hadn't existed mere moments before. It was the plainest chair Jack had ever seen, and yet when he/she/it sat in it, the chair became more regal than any throne could ever be. With a curious tilt of his/her/its head, his guest replied, slipping between mother and lover as it did. "What an amusing idea! How could life and death ever be in conflict with one and other? They each only exist because of the other! Only within the light of life can death exist, and only in the shadow of death can life have meaning!"

Jack leaned forward, refusing to be so easily deflected. "And yet when you decide it's time, you reach out and take the lives of your 'children.' That doesn't seem very motherly to me!"

The old woman sitting before Jack had a kind and soft smile on her lips, and her voice spoke of countless fond memories with every syllable. "I have no need to take my children before their time. They all return to me eventually, and when they do, they bring the most wonderful stories with them! They tell me of love, hope, beauty, and passion! When I welcome them into my embrace, it is as a mother welcoming her children home. All that I receive is freely offered, and all that they have I freely give!"

Jack's eyes narrowed, and he pushed on once more. "So, what happens after you 'welcome them home?' What happens after death?"

The old man closed his eyes and shook his head as he replied. "That is not my tale to tell. Nor is it the reason for my visit."

The entity remained seated and looked at Jack, as though waiting patiently for a particularly slow student to catch up. Jack did not like being condescended to. "So did you come all this way just to talk relative philosophy with me? Or did you have some other reason for your visit?"

The proud father pierced Jack with his gaze as he answered. "I came to get a measure of the man who caught the attention of one of my favorite daughters. You don't look like much. You're so small and frail, even now, you hang onto your life by the thinnest of threads. Tell me, what makes you think you deserve my daughter's affection?"

Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.

Of all the answers Jack had been expecting, that wasn't one. He sat back a little, thinking hard. Was this some kind of test? What happens when you give the god of life and death the wrong answer? Was there even a right answer? His mind was a whirlwind of possible solutions, analyzing and rejecting them all as he remained silent.

The deity seemed to grow impatient. "Despite my eternal nature, I am very busy and don't have all day to spend talking to some half-dead intruder in my realm. So tell me now, why do you deserve my daughter's affection?"

Jack felt tired. Tired of everything that happened since he landed, tired of this nondescript place, tired of being thrown to the whims of fate, and very tired of his 'guest' looking down on him. So when Jack answered, it wasn't with some well thought out and articulated response. Instead, he just threw out whatever thoughts occurred to him. "You want to know why I deserve S'haar's attention? I don't! Setting aside the whole stupidity contained within the idea of deserving anyone's affection, and believe me, I could tear that idea apart for hours before running out of material, I don't deserve anything from anyone."

The entity looked like it wanted to interject, but Jack rode roughshod over him/her/it, never giving his guest any chance to speak up. "No one does! We should accept what is offered with gratitude, not begrudge someone for not providing us something we decided they owe us! The whole idea behind your question is absurd!"

At this point, Jack realized he was standing very close to and looking up at an enormous, self-proclaimed god of death. Even with him/her/it seated, Jack was dwarfed by his 'guest,' and Jack was starting to wonder at the wisdom behind shouting at someone who could probably wipe him from existence with little to no effort. Biting back any further ranting, Jack looked at his feet as he spoke again. "Er... Sorry, I think I've been here too long, and I'm starting to go stir-crazy... I didn't mean..."

The mother looked down on Jack kindly as she cut him off. "You meant every word. You spoke with passion and courage, don't undo that by trying to back down now! I can see what my daughter sees in you... and that's what makes what I must do next all the more difficult." That last part was spoken by the father again, although it wasn't pride that filled his voice, but sorrow.

Looking down at Jack, his face became dark and grim as he took a measure of Jack's soul once more. "Not long ago, several of my sons were returned to me with their stories unfinished. They were sent by your hand. What do you say in defense of this act?"

This question hit Jack like a hammer blow to the gut. When he looked down, Jack could see the blood of the men he'd killed coating his hands. For a moment, he felt an overwhelming urge to wash them clean, but Jack knew this blood was the testament of the lives he'd taken, and it belonged where it was.

Jack closed his eyes and took a deep breath before he responded. As he spoke, he looked into the distance, the face of the last raider he'd killed still burned into his mind. "I deeply regret the loss of life, I don't think the blood I spilled will ever stop haunting my dreams, but I don't regret the decisions I made that day. You speak of stories cut short? What about S'haar's story? What about Em'brel's? I'm still haunted by the faces of the dead, but I would do it again if given a chance to live those moments over."

Jack looked up into the accuser's grim face and met the man's eyes as he spoke. "Are S'haar's and Em'bre's lives worth less than the raiders? Or is it purely a numbers game where the majority of lives determine the correct course of action? If so, I reject your accusation! I fought for those who meant the most to me, as any man, woman, or child should! Anyone who says otherwise is either lying, deluded, or a monster!"

The deity was holding a sword now, one whose blade was longer than Jack was tall. He pointed at Jack accusingly with one hand and held the sword ready to strike with the other as he spoke. "And what of the future? Your very presence is upsetting the balance of my world. You bring conflict and war! Countless more of my children will have their stories cut short! Why should I suffer your presence on this land any longer?"

Jack looked into the eyes of the god of life and death and saw only himself looking back. He shook his head and heaved a sad, shallow laugh. "Well, I suppose that depends on you. If you are omniscient and can see all possible futures and know that removing me will lead to an objectively better future for your people, then go ahead and do whatever you have to do. However, if you are bound by the tides of time like the rest of us mere mortals and are only guessing at possible futures, then I reject your judgment again! Yes, this road may very well lead to war and conflict, and I'll be forced to take more lives to protect those I care for. You think I'm not aware of that? But it could lead to better food, medicine, and education as well! Probably a little of everything. Will the good outweigh the bad? I don't know! I can only do what most people do every day, try to do what's right, try to fix what I break, and try to learn from my mistakes! If that's not enough for you, too bad, because that's all I've got!"

Jack glared at the entity for a few moments in silence. He'd run out of bravery near the end of his rant and was now glaring out of fear that he'd open his mouth and have his voice reveal his uncertainty. His guest continued to stare down at the small man for a few more moments before sheathing his sword. "It's a shame you were born human. You would have made an excellent argu'n."

The deity was suddenly closer to S'haar's height, though Jack couldn't remember seeing her form change. She leaned in, and Jack felt the icy breath of the seductive visive of death once more. "Though if you so chose, when you die, I'll be happy to welcome you into my embrace. I'm certain we can find a place for you in the world to come."

Jack backed away with a shiver running along his spine. Though at the moment, he couldn't say if it was due to desire or fear.

At that moment, S'haar's voice cut through the haze, and Jack could hear her talking about her day. For the first time since he got here, he could clearly understand what she was saying. He also noticed a faint path had appeared, leading far into the distance, seeming to head into the direction of S'haar's voice.

Jack spared a glance back to his guest. Gesturing at the road, he asked the only question that occurred to him. "Did you do this?"

The mother looked back with an odd pride evident on her face. "Everything that happened here today was due to your own choices, not mine. Until you were sure about what path to walk, none could appear."

She looked down at the road that seemed to stretch far past the nonexistent horizon. "It looks like you have quite a long walk. I'd get started if I were you."

Jack stared at the entity a moment longer, trying to decide if he'd really been visited by the divine spirit of an argu'n god or if his mind created him/her/it out of desperation for some form of stimulation. Her enigmatic smile offered no answers, and Jack supposed that even if she provided any answers, he wouldn't be able to tell if those answers were any more real than the entity offering them.

In any event, when he blinked, he/she/it was gone. All the remained was Jack, the road, and S'haar's voice. Jack shrugged, turned, and started walking.

-

Angela knew she wasn't wrong about what she'd just witnessed but replayed the video of what had happened just to be sure. Sure enough, Jack's index finger on his right hand had twitched. She quickly did a series of scans to see if there were any significant changes. While it seemed there might be some slight improvement, it was well within the margin of error. It wasn't likely that Jack was suddenly going to wake up, but still... Despite the lack of significant evidence, she felt her hope surge at the tiny movement.

As the night passed and the rest of the ship slept, Angela repeatedly played the video of Jack's finger twitching. She spoke to herself in a whisper since everyone else within earshot was currently asleep. "Hurry back you big nerd. We need you here, not lost in some weird dream."