14 – Take over

The demonstration of the golem was a disaster. Paul’s feeling of unease started with Alfred’s first inspection of the “wooden sword spider” and his gruff expression as he took it to the animation chamber. Meanwhile Benjamin began leafing through Paul’s documentation. Then in the testing room, two of the legs couldn’t strike at their target at all, their explosive joint being unresponsive. Three of the legs’ strikes were off target, resulting in unimpressive glancing blows. The legs were still damaged, leaving the golem with a noticeable limp. Two of the legs struck their target on-center, but without doing significant damage. The first because it had insufficient power, the second because the leg itself snapped under the force of impact. Only one leg managed to skewer a practice dummy. And after that the golem lost balance and fell over.

Alfred and Benjamin were very impressed.

Paul did not compute.

But as his father kissed his cheeks and slapped his back, and even his uncle put a firm hand on the shoulder whilst giving him a warm “well done”, Paul was forced to accept that they were -indeed- impressed.

It felt good.

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In the days that followed, Alfred and Benjamin gradually took over Paul’s research into explosive joints. Paul got himself a pet rabbit, which he soon bonded with, and granted himself a little break. Benjamin’s cycle of design, prototype, experiment and improvement was so fast that if Paul started working on anything remotely similar to something his father was working on, he could expect it to be obsolete before it was finished.

Being left in the dust by his father, Paul contented himself by watching a sunrise, fixing his wardrobe with some re-sorting and a few purchases, and making his pet rabbit hop. That last pastime left him with another dose of hypoxic backlash, and mentally cursing Tessera. At least it wasn’t as bad as it had been the first time with the goat, because Paul had had the foresight to cover himself with a nice warm duvet.

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Paul’s quiet break was disturbed one evening when, not long after she’d helped him get ready for bed, Margaret knocked on his door again. She looked very nervous.

Paul looked at her, and waited. It wasn’t a servant’s place to interrupt her master’s rest, and he was tired. But then again she had served him well for almost two years, he could grant her a favour.

“I’m sorry,” she began.

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“but,” she swallowed the word, stumbled in her breathing.

Looked at his feet.

“Couldyoupleaseletmesleepinyourroomtonight?” she asked.

Looked up at his face. “Please?”

“What?” said Paul, the only thing that came to his mind.

“Please, I’ll sleep on the floor, or… in your bed. Whatever you want,” she pleaded him, her words rushed. Her eyes big.

“No.” said Paul. He pinched his nose, closing his eyes.

:: yes :: said Tessera in his mind.

“Why?” said Paul, out loud.

“For protection,” said Margaret. “I… I…”

::Because we need her:: said Tessera. ::Aren’t you sick of your slow progress?::

“Ok,” sighed Paul. Margaret came in, letting the door close behind her. And in Paul’s tiredness and confusion he allowed Tessera to speak through him.

“Here’s the deal,” he said. “I’ll need a thimble of your blood. People will assume we’re having sex. We won’t, but don’t contradict them. I may become unresponsive, and may even stop breathing. Keep me warm but don’t kiss me. Don’t speak a word of this to anyone.”

Margaret looked at him fearfully. Then she turned her back to him, found a needle, pricked her finger, and bled into Paul’s night-stand glass.

::She just handed you more than a month of her life:: Tessera said smugly, as she passed Paul the glass. ::No questions asked::

As in a daze, Paul drank from the glass, then flushed down the blood with water drunk from the same glass.

“Just one more thing,” Paul added quietly, as Margaret turned away from him. “If you ever see Helen, please tell her the truth.”

Then he lay down, facing away from her. Not long after he felt Margaret slide into bed behind him.

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Connecting with a human felt very different from connecting to an animal. Margaret’s spirit felt familiar, welcoming almost. In his heart of hearts Paul felt the deep joy that comes with recognising a kindred spirit. Which was funny, because Paul’s heart had probably stopped beating at this point.

Comparing Margarets spirit to his own, Paul noted that their cores were similar in shape, colour, and movement. Her outer layers however were ragged, pale, and feeble. Vulnerable. The knowledge was unsettling, not least because Paul didn’t know why he interpreted the damage as vulnerability. And again, why did he call it damage?

Regardless, Paul felt that he could dive in, understand, and take control. If he wanted to. Not that he would. But he could. He definitely could.

::Careful, complacence comes before the fall ::

As Paul touched Margarets mind she startled, and focused her entire being on pretending he wasn’t there in her mind. Paul could feel Margaret breathing and her heart beating in her chest. As she reached out for him she could feel his body underneath Margaret’s hand. It felt… odd.

Seeing himself through her eyes felt odd too.

“Paul,” Margaret whispered, gently shaking his shoulder, “Paul!”

◦◦Don’t worry◦◦ Paul said ◦◦I’m here◦◦

◦◦ Everything is fine ◦◦

He might even have believed it himself.