Chapter 1
My name is Xxvrlgl, a wish demon like you would find anywhere, and this sad and pitiful story is mine. I was doing my job as usual, you know, this job is a thankless one, but I took much pride and no less pleasure in it. As you know, in the wish granting industry, one as to give to his contractor exactly what was asked but never what they wanted.
Some time you would grant people fame and ruin their lives with stalkers, drug or sickness. Some other time you would save a world from an imminent threat by mean of a less urgent one. What matter above all is the ability to think outside the box.
That day I had answered a summon as usual and was listening half absently to some king in some kingdom. They were fighting some devil not demon army, not some of us I made sure, and were in dire need of help. It wasn't a request I had granted many time and I was reflecting on some novel way to ruin it. I had already zombie invasion and plague was just so last millennium... Extraterrestrial invasion might do, but finding some is always so bothersome. And suddenly among the crap the fool was spewing some word resounded in my mind.
- mumbo jumbo important sounding crap.... hero.... more crap...
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I rewinded his talk to the important passage.
- ... we beg you, please hero save this country, no this world from the devil army...
The hero was me ! I blurted :
- I am no hero !
Controlling myself in time not to say any more than this, and my foolish summoner answered as such :
- We are sorry about that, most heroes in the past have been normal persons such as yourself, but all of them were granted great power and had their wishes answered by the gods...
I had been set up by the competition ! My body was now that of a flesh bag like my surrounding cursed to all the flesh, like eating, shitting and other such disgusting action. As you might expect, learning of that I tried to kill myself, but I could not, the damned gods had put some form of compulsion on me. Worse than that, I could not hurt humans in ways unrelated to my summoner wish, no end of the world, no plague, not even a running nose !
Those gods had bound me in a literal paradise of good feeling and cooperation where I had no choice but to help my summoner. I cried, I really cried. The good hearted fool thought it was for some stupid reason like missing my family or some other cracp and I let them think whatever they wanted. I had to find a way to beat the gods to their game, I had to find some loophole somewhere !