The children.

The visions.

The murals and that statue they were sacrificed for.

I noticed some important details over the circumstances to do with the children by the help of the notification windows appearing from time to time.

Among the memories that showed after pulling them away from the sacrificial hall.

Al was the name for the owner of this body.

A young magi who did not know why he walked on the path of mana.

It was expected of those who’ve awakened their first circle as a magi to enter dungeons as the rewards from completing one can improve living conditions, but also prove worth to a persons family.

We were similar when it came to sabotaging our life over nothing.

At the end.

During a mission within a dungeon.

They were captured by a powerful group and sacrificed.

Although that’s what the system says.

I noticed from the images of memories shown and those flooding across my head the event was not so simple.

Those who were responsible knew how to deal with magi.

The one sided annihilation started with the most capable of the children dying first until they settled for those who were engulfed by the sheer brutality of people who doesn't have a soul.

It reminded me of a time from long ago.

Those days were over, but it seemed there was a resemblance to the world here too.

[ You’ve identified from the memories of Al that an attempt at a forbidden 9th circle spell had failed.]

The spell was one of the attempts to survive a calamity.

So if any of them were to die their mana would be transferred to the next living vessel until there was enough mana to cast a summoning formation.

It was the thoughts and understanding I deduced from the scene shown from the video and through the boys desperation.

Only that the spell they placed their hopes on failed.

I was here instead of the one they wanted to summon.

[ Your analysis over memories has gained experienced.]

[ Al suffered and died as the last—-] He died because he believed in the spell and believed it work.

The spell to temporarily summon someone from the future.

Something about how it worked burned vividly in my thoughts.

Mostly the small detail over the reason it failed.

“…” There had to be a future in order for it to work.

All 30 children who had died lined up outside the hall and I stared into the darkness and thought over the spell entirely.

I didn’t have a future… but Al now had one because I was living.

To cast it. It didn’t have to be a future version of the caster to respond to the summon.

It can be someone related to their blood, but unlike Al I had little faith in the purpose for the spell.

My reasons for the spell was more selfish.

I didn’t care if it worked or how long the summon could keep someone in the past for.

The children… They had to return home.

The spells I practiced and imitating the vision never worked.

I had this thought I was disabled when it came to mana and magic.

The importance of the first circle that was in the memory.

I could not feel any presence of it at all and that feeling made sense to me.

I was not Al.

Which is why I approached the vision who I knew was someone who was simply absurd with magic and more capable.

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He was just an illusion, but I had this feeling I knew what he was.

[ You have approached a 9th circle magi.]

[ You have approached a potential future of Al.]

The only difference was him being a lot older and his left eye wasn’t gold anymore like his magic the aura cloaking his entire form was of the color violet.

I didn’t know what a 9th circle magi was or how important it meant to others.

I just stared at this form of him sadly.

What a fucking waste.

Such a fucking waste.

If only the kid was alive instead of me.

“ You had so much potential Al.” I could easily tell from his appearance and how formidable he appeared at that age.

He cared about his life and somewhere inside of me.

I envied that.

“ You should have lived instead.”

I displaced the symbols of a summon formation spell in front of him.

Not caring about the possibility of it working nor caring about the absolute certainty that it would fail like my attempts before.

So based on the understanding I had of the spell. I imitated the gruesome vision I saw in Al’s last moments.

The memory of it. The reference of the spell shown vividly through the window.

Although Al continuously was murdered in my head for an understanding of the spell from his memory.

I numbed my heart just like the day I chose to stop continuing.

[ Due to you standing between the border of the past and future your awareness of normality has been heavily distorted.]

Blood spilled out my nose as I reached the final writings of the spell.

I knew how to dissociate myself from the pain.

It still hurt though when I saw it fail and the text from window that appeared shortly after it vanished through my fingers.

I knew it would not do anything.

I was prepared for it too.

[ The spell has failed.]

[ You have gained experience in summoning formations.]

Experience? No… I was not allowed to have that type of luxury.

Not after I learned the mana being wasted belong to them.

It was difficult to imitate memories and visions when you don’t understand the reason why your chest is being torn from just writing symbols in blood.

I did not understand it at all.

[ The spell has failed.]

[ You have gained experience in summoning formations.]

I did it perfectly too.

Mana was wasted again.

I had to do better.

[ Damage to your body will deteriorate the potency of the spell.]

This body means nothing to me at all.

The pain and what I feel don’t matter.

I won’t allow myself to ruin it.

There was no failure in their spell or the method to activate it.

The problem was my inexperience.

This was the only problem.

If by some slim chance the future him could appear here only for a moment.

Who ever was summoned would understand my intentions the moment they see everyone.

I tried.

Because Al’s future deserved more than this.

“ Again.” After all the pain is gone only then will you know.

You did all you can and failed for it.

So what if the spell failed?

You’ve known nothing but that right from the start.

At least this time… Not a soul will be affected by your actions.

This… world… and that pain…

[ The spell has failed.]

[ You have gained experience in summoning formations.]

—-Again.

[ The spell has failed.]

[ You have gained experience in summoning formations.]

———Again.

[ The spell has failed.]

[ You have gained experience in summoning formations.]

——Again.

[ The spell has failed.]

[ You have gained experience in summoning formations.]

This world and that pain had no meaning to me.

On earth the dead can’t walk again.

Although religions speak highly about there being another life it was only hopeless words they could only offer, but never fully prove unless you sell your entire soul to it and even then if by chance you did manage to live in that glory.

It simply doesn’t matter at all.

In my youth all I wanted was to be happy and now that I’m older.

All I thought for the rest of my days was how I could remove myself from the world.

My actions do not matter here, but even I believed it in this illusion.

The choices you make will never betray you.

It will fail and maybe one day the world will continuously move forward without you.

What matters most isn’t really you.

It’s the effort you had made for those you had left behind.

If your future ends and your effort in others failed too.

It’s okay.

You did all you can right?

[ The spell has failed.]

[ You have gained experience in summoning formations.]

“…” Bleeding. Footsteps trailed behind me because every pore under my foot burned from the sensation of it.

I left the vision because I did not have to die in front of him and the others.

I don’t know how long I attempted the spell.

I stopped paying attention after the blur.

The moment I picked up on the familiar sensation I had from before.

I knew that what I had done had caused extreme damage to this body and even if I did not attempt at one more spell.

It will surely die from overwork and destruction.

Psychologically I was still here, my body was not.

I knew I had it in me to cast the spell once, but even after all the spells I had written and corrected to reduce the stress on my body.

I did not learn anything even if on the window it showed there was experience.

It was just empty words from the start.

A form of insanity to distract me as I lived here.

Anyway I did not do what I had done because of some mere window that showed often.

If there was something someone had to die for.

At least I proved that it wasn’t an accident someone like me could also burn out.

[ Due to the excessive experience you have gathered.]

[ You have simplified and modified a 9th circle spell cast to be activated without the use of mana.]

[ Due to the requirements registered for the spell using the system as a medium.]

[ Activation of the spell will be casted the moment the host heart fails.]

[ Mana will be transferred to the system and the simplified summoning formation theory will be activated using the past experiences of the host.]

[ Activation of the spell will be casted through the sacrificial theory represented by the host.]

I began writing on the ground a simple wish.

Like the journal I had at home.

I used blood to convey the desperation the others died for.

Even the loss of feeling in my fingers could not finish it.

It was harder to breathe.

[ Your body has stopped functioning.]

I know.

It was the same sensation as the last time.

Unlike then… I wasn’t suffocating.

Who ever said there was a peaceful and humane death were monsters or a bunch of thinking quacks.

It was hard to say it was over.

The loss of vision and feeling now…

So that’s just it then?

I only pray that who ever does come from out the spell.

Doesn’t leave them here.

[ Health has deteriorated and meets sacrificial spell execution criteria.]

[ Low health target will be executed.]

[ Due to the hosts variable placed in the systems execution criteria an entry will be shown for 10 seconds before the hosts execution.]

[ Thank you for everything.]