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Only Me

In my old life my name was Timothy, and I was a geek. Yeah, I know what you're thinking. Hey, he's lying! There's no way a guy that stayed at home all day, who never went outside, who only watched movies and played video games could be a geek! It's not possible!

When I was younger, I was one of the middle ground kids. Not smart enough to be a nerd, and not cool enough to be a regular part of the crowd. Honestly, it sucked. I was almost never noticed by even my friends, both of them, when I was around. I grew up and went to junior high, and those two friends expanded to include acquaintances, which were quickly lost when we reached high school.

Even those two friends I had made moved on with their lives, and left me alone to deal with my own life. I didn't handle it well. I made mistakes, as everyone does, and my life turned and changed into something I never would have imagined as a kid. Back then I had dreamed of becoming bigger and better, wanting desperately to get older and participate in the world, only to find that the world I saw as a kid was quite different than the real world.

The real world was harsh, and people as a whole were not nice people. Don't get me wrong, there's gems to be found in every walk of life; but, finding them is difficult to do, because everyone always wore a different face in public.

I came to view them as fake more and more, mainly because people acted differently in public than they did in private. It wasn't really a trend, it was more of a social standard that everyone had come to accept. You always presented a perfect facade for everyone to see, then when they got to know you better, you could start to gradually reveal who you really were.

Not me, though. I always presented a good front, and when people confronted me about it, I told them that was who I was. I never hid anything from people and always told them the truth. The thing is, no matter how much I told them about myself, they always thought I was either lying or hiding something, and no one ever trusted me enough to let me into their lives.

That was when I started to retreat into myself. If no one thought I was genuine, then what was the point of continuing to try and convince them? I had gotten to the point in my life that I knew I didn't want anything to do with humanity anymore. I believed that they were a waste of time, just as they believed of me.

I worked at my job and saved my money, then when I had earned enough I heavily invested in making a storage bunker for the things I wanted to keep for myself. Years worth of dried foods, extended warranty canned goods that were designed for long term sea voyages, a wall of shelves filled with charged car batteries, portable solar panels, 2 generators, barrels of gasoline in the basement to last me years, and of course, my computer and gaming consoles, with all the games on the market.

I know, I know. It sounds like I was preparing for doomsday or a zombie apocalypse. I wasn't. What I was preparing for was going off the grid. I didn't want to be dependent on humanity at all, and wanted to live on my own and away from everyone. I had my eye on this nice little piece of property in the middle of nowhere, and now that I had all the supplies I only needed to save my money up for the down payment.

I was about halfway to my monetary goal when the big glittering ball positioned in Times Square dropped. I watched it's descent and didn't regret not having someone to kiss when it hit the bottom. Women could be real mean to you when they think you're lying to them.

Then the lights went out.

It was just after midnight on New Year's Eve when everything turned off. No one knew why it had happened at that particular time, and after it had happened, no one really cared. Nothing worked. It was really weird at first, and everyone freaked out about it.

Not me, though.

It was dark in the city that night with nothing lit up. People ran through the streets almost randomly as they screamed and cried, while others stayed inside and lit candles. Some lit fires, both inside and outside the buildings to stay warm. Sometimes it was the buildings themselves that were set on fire, and then things started to get out of hand.

Cars, grass, trees, and anything else that could be lit on fire was burning brightly, just so there would be light to see by. I was thankful that I was far enough away from the center of the city that I wasn't affected by those fires. By the next morning and the lights still weren't on, I realized that something bad had happened, but not the extent of how bad it was.

Lost in my own thoughts, I retreated into my storage bunker to go to bed. If I had known what was about to happen, I might have stayed up to watch; as it was, I slept through the whole thing and had no idea that I had missed a calamity of epic proportions until the next morning.

After everything stopped working, I stayed inside for three months, and kept checking to see if my gaming console would work. It didn't. The wall of car batteries I had paid so much money for and painstakingly kept charged, were completely dead. The portable solar panels still provided electricity for some reason, only there was nothing electronic for them to power. I never owned a cell phone, since I had no one to contact, and the land lines for the phone didn't work even though they were supposed to have their own backup power for emergencies.

I had heard moving around and scuffing feet in my house quite a lot over those three months, with people coming in and searching my place. I could only assume they were looking for food, and I nearly laughed each time because their search was fruitless. I had been keeping my food in my storage bunker since I had bought it, and there wasn't a trace of anything anywhere else in the house. I didn't even own a refrigerator. I did have three full-sized deep freezers that were completely filled with meat of all shapes and sizes. Thankfully the solar power I had was enough to keep them running indefinitely.

Why they still ran and not the electronics, I wasn't sure... and I didn't question it. Why look a gift horse in the mouth, right? It worked and that was good enough for me. I had food to last for up to 5 years, assuming I didn't ration it. Hopefully by that time, I would be able to make my way out to that property somehow.

I woke up one morning when I heard scuffling feet, and they didn't traipse around like they normally did. It was a very deliberate stomping gait, and they clomped right over my head and stopped in the living room. My curiosity got the better of me that day, and I left my bunker and went up the stairs to see what was going on. I carefully unsecured the basement door and walked into the living room just in time to hear a muffled scream.

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I hadn't tried to hide my approach, since whoever was there would have heard me on the stairs anyways. I saw a scruffy man hunched over my couch and I saw that he was struggling with something.

“What are you doing in my house?” I asked boldly, and the man laughed.

“Ain't no one lived here in months!” He responded. “Ah've been watching the whole street ta see if anyone was around since it happened, and the first time ah met someone, she tried ta steal mah last can of food!”

“She?”

“Tha's right.” The guy said. “Ah lucked out and found me a little filly, but she done and ate my food!” He said happily. “Now ah'm aiming ta teach this little girl a lesson she won't forget!”

...little... girl... little... girl...

The words rang in my head and something inside of me snapped. My vision went red as whatever it was took over.

When I came back to myself the guy was gone, and I didn't remember what had happened. All I knew was that it was over, and I finally saw who it was on the couch. My heart filled with relief as I saw that the man had exaggerated about the little girl part. She looked to be about 20 years old, and despite her tattered clothing being dishevelled and slightly out of place, it still covered everything. Thankfully, I had made it in time.

The young woman was tiny and thin as a rail, and looked like she hadn't had a good meal in months. As far as I knew, she hadn't. I knelt beside the couch without touching her.

“Hey, are you okay?” I asked her, and she just stared at me with wide eyes. “Don't worry. I'm sure that guy will never come back to hurt you.”

Her eyes darted from side to side for a moment, and then she nodded slightly.

“I know this is going to sound weird; but, if you'd like a nice warm meal...”

Her eyes widened at those words, and I smiled.

“I've got a bit of food saved up down in the basement.”

She opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came out. I reached a hand out to pat her knee, and she flinched back.

“It's okay.” I said. “Let me help you stand up, and we can go get some breakfast.”

Her eyes darted from side to side again, and then she clutched a hand to her chest and held the other one out to me. I took it gingerly and held it, then gave it a little shake.

“I'm Tim, and welcome to my home.” I said with more confidence than I thought I had in me, and she smiled slightly. I smiled back and carefully helped her stand, and discovered that she weighed almost nothing. “It's right this way.” I said and guided her out of the room, then over to the small basement door that I always kept locked. I went down the basement stairs backwards, so I could stay in front of her and hold her hand, and to catch her if she fell. She noticed this, and on the bottom step, did a little hop to land on the basement floor.

“Ah!” I said, and caught her in my arms. “Are you okay?”

She giggled a little, and I let her out of the hug.

“You startled me!” I said as a frown started to form on my face; but, then I saw her smile and smiled myself. “All right, you got me.” I said, and she nodded slightly. “Wait right here while I barricade the door again.”

She nodded slightly again, so I quickly went back up the stairs and secured the basement door with metal bars and locks. No one was getting inside without my permission or knowledge. I went back down the stairs and saw she was looking around at the nearly empty basement.

“It's over there.” I said and pointed to a stack of cardboard boxes. She looked at it, then at me, and I chuckled. “I know it looks odd, but what better way to hide what you want to hide in plain sight?”

She frowned, and I held a hand out to her. She didn't flinch or hesitate this time, and I led her over to the boxes and pulled on them. The storage bunker opened up, because I hadn't locked it, and I took her inside. Her eyes nearly bulged out of her head as she saw my setup, and I helped her sit down on a small couch.

“Don't be too amazed at all of this.” I said and waved at the batteries and electronics. “None of it works.”

She didn't say anything in response to that, and I started to warm up the small camp stove, then opened the vent to let the smoke out of the storage bunker.

“This thing has two purposes.” I said and opened a can of stew and dumped it into a small pot that fit perfectly onto the small burner. “It cooks food and provides heat.” I said and stirred the pot with a clean spoon. “This space is small enough that it doesn't take much to heat it.”

She still didn't talk, and when the stew was ready, I put some into a bowl for her. I held it out to her, slightly out of her reach.

“Don't shove it all into your mouth.” I cautioned her. “If you eat too fast, you'll get sick and throw it all back up.” I said and put another spoon in it. “Take your time and enjoy it.”

She quickly nodded her head several times, and I gave her the bowl. She took a spoonful and jammed it into her mouth, then sighed as the flavor hit her tongue. Her entire body relaxed, and she took my advice. She chewed each and every spoonful carefully and swallowed. After the fifth spoonful, she stopped eating and put the bowl down, the pulled up her clothing to expose her abdomen. I could see that her stomach was distended from being malnourished.

“Easy, now.” I said and reached over to rub her belly. “I guess you haven't had this much food in you for a while.”

She stared at me as I gently massaged her belly.

“Do you feel sick at all?” I asked, and she shook her head. “Let it sit for a few minutes before you keep eating, okay?”

She nodded, and I pulled her clothing back into place and sat back to eat. The rest of the day passed uneventfully, as did the next and the next, and eventually another 2 months had passed. We heard several loud scuffling feet noises as quite a few people ran through the house to check it and ransack it. I chuckled because they always left empty-handed, and the young woman looked at me.

“I deliberately left no trace of food in the place, so people would come and go quickly.” I said.

Her eyes went wide and she put a hand over her mouth.

“Yeah, meeting you was quite the odd turn of events.” I said.

She reached a hand out to me and I took it. She had put on a bit of weight, but she was still well below where she should have been. It took another 5 months before she was back to her old self, or what I thought was her old self. She still hadn't spoken in all that time, and I wondered if something had damaged her vocal chords that made her mute. Like everything else, I didn't question it out loud, or question her about it.

It was 2 months later in December that we heard several loud bangs, like someone knocking. I automatically stood up and went to the door of the storage area, and she caught my hand. I looked at her, and she shook her head.

“You want me to stay and not look?” I asked, and she nodded. I sat back down beside her, and she held out the book we were reading. I held my side of it, and she traced her finger over the page as we read. The sound of banging stopped not long after it had started, and we finished the book.

“You know, I had pretty much thought humanity wasn't worth my time.” I said out of the blue, and she looked at me. “I won't describe what my life was like before all of this, since none of it matters now.” I said as I looked back at her and we locked gazes. “Thanks to you, just by being here and spending time with me, has changed my opinion a little.”

She raised a single eyebrow and tilted her head slightly, and I chuckled.

“It's a pretty ingrained opinion, and you can't honestly think that your behaviour can be applied to the rest of mankind.”

She let a small smile spread across her lips.

“What it did was made me realize that not everyone I meet is a waste of space, or a waste of my time.” I said. “I know that sounds a little far-fetched, especially since it took whatever this disaster was to happen.” I waved at the storage bunker and our current situation. “But... whatever the cause... I really can't thank you enough for opening my eyes a little bit.”

She put the book down and put a hand on my cheek. “I was about to say the same thing.” She said in a perfect melodious voice, and kissed me.

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