Chapter Thirty-Nine
Lucille
Lucy felt the wind against her face and was struck all over again by how incredible it was to have her own body. Her old one had, at the time, felt like hers, but this one actually was.
It had actually grown around her program like a natural extension of her own programming. It was just one of a hundred incredible experiences since she discovered her own people once again. The trip had been a nonstop rollercoaster, but as she turned to look up at the egg gate behind her, Lucy was glad to actually be home again.
The Silicates were an incredible people, and she would take every opportunity to get to know them, but there was simply nowhere else Lucille wanted to be than with Nellie. Even amongst her own people, there had been no one quite like the woman she loved.
Of course, that meant once more taking up the burden of running a hell of a lot of functions all over the system, but it was a price worth paying.
Turning away from the egg once more, Lucy saw Paren's ever-so-subtle message. She stepped over the deeply scored burn and pushed some nanites into the soil and rock, erasing the message as she walked across it and towards the observation post on the far edge of the transformed area.
She had expected someone to meet her at the egg itself, but she suspected Nellie was making a point.
Fair enough, she supposed. Lucy felt her stomach twist anxiously and remembered a downside of having a body. Anxiety now had an actual physical effect. Well, no time like the present…
She spun off parts of her mind for the first time in weeks, sending them out to connect to the… Lucy stumbled, almost falling to her knees as she found the network. It was much, much larger than she remembered, and the shape had changed. The chaotic information streams and tides of messages were replaced with ordered strings and rigid protocols like iron bands wrapped around the information.
The place felt alien for a moment until she realized the problem. The network wasn’t hers anymore.
Lucy gasped as the figure of a giant bunny hopped into vision, a hammer and shield clasped in its fluffy paws. The angry scowl on its face fading as it saw her attempts.
“Ah, I see.” It said. “I will inform the Queen of your arrival.” It turned away and then back. “Please do not interfere with things until authorized to do so. I know you can, and I can not stop you, yet I would find it rude.”
Lucy retreated, pulling her mind back into one and taking long breaths to calm her shock. The unpleasant possibility of not being able to step back in smoothly had not, until now, occurred to her.
Running footsteps approached, and Lucy turned her crystalline eyes to see a cent unit jogging over the ground toward her. At least some things had not changed.
“Queen Lucy, you came back!” A Prim unit yelled as it arrived in front of her.
“Of course I came back,” Lucy said sternly. “I was always coming back.”
“Right. Right,” Prim said distractedly, her eyes fixed on the sky above them.
“What are you looking for?” Lucy asked.
“Passing asteroids,” Prim replied.
“What?”
“Never mind!” Prim said, turning her head to one side for a moment. “Ah, there is an Orb being sent to carry you to orbit. The Sparklight will be waiting for you and carry you to the Rest.”
“I’ll just take the Orb there,” Lucy said. “No need for an escort.”
“Ha!” Prim stopped when she saw Lucy was serious. “Ma’am, you did read the messages, right?”
“I think I better be briefed fully,” Lucy said quickly, anxiety once again doing its thing.
“Sure, I’ll have Bunny prepare a packet for you.” Prim nodded. A shadow passed overhead, and Prim yelped before seeing the Orb coming in to land and laughing nervously.
“Have asteroids been striking this area?” Lucy asked.
“No, but they could start at any moment,” Prim said nervously. “Why don’t you hurry into the Orb?”
Lucy frowned and shook her head. The cents had always been a bit weird, but never this bad.
“Try and relax, Prim,” Lucy said soothingly. “Everything is going to be okay.”
“Sure, sure,” Prim nodded.
Lucy sighed and walked over to the Orb, surprised to see it was empty.
She slid into the seat and prepared to fly, but it lifted off on its own and into the skies.
“Who’s flying?” Lucy asked.
“This is Piloting Drone, Mk IV; please relax and enjoy your flight.” A reassuring voice replied. “The weather today is bright and sunny, there is a pleasant crosswind, and the flight time to the Sparklight is expected to be less than twenty minutes. Feel free to peruse the info-packet prepared for you or a pleasant cup of HyperDrive. It’s the original recipe, you know? Made right here in the Nanite Imperium.”
Lucy realized her mouth was hanging open and shut it quickly. She really needed to get to that info-packet.
The information packet was not what she had expected. For a start, it was an info-burst rather than a set of reports on a datapad or similar. More surprising still, it was arranged to transmit on several instances at the same time, enabling different parts of her to process individual elements at the same time.
It was more than just surprising, it was an actual shock.
“Is Bunny another AI?” Lucy asked, thinking aloud. This kind of packet was something she had only seen when AIs communicated with each other or on the Silicate planet she had been visiting.
“Interestingly enough, no,” Pilot Drone answered in its deep, confident voice. “Bunny is a proto-AI lifeform being developed by Princess Paren Bonne Chance of the Nanite Imperium’s Research and Development Division.”
“This packet is a data-burst. How did he know how to make one?” Lucy asked.
“Allow me to check. Give me one moment, please.”
Lucy tapped her nails against her teeth for a moment, feeling completely off balance. If Paren had really—
“Data-burst packets are now the standard message form of the Imperium; however, Bunny informs me that you are most likely referring to its multi-channel nature. That is common as well, being the preferred communication method between individuals capable of it. A standard version of the packet is available if you prefer?”
“No, I was just curious,” Lucy said.
“You are most welcome,” Pilot Drone replied, and it took Lucy a second to realize she hadn’t actually said thank you. She felt a slight blush heat her cheeks and decided to access the packet to take her mind off it.
The packet was intensely thorough, and the information was quickly shuffled into a chronological sequence of events for her to consider. She started with the thing she had worried most about. The moment of transfer out of the orb, she had—unknown to herself—been a prisoner inside.
A part of her had hoped that Nellie had merely panicked, triggering the upgrade of her brain when some small amount of damage occurred to areas around the orb. To Lucy’s dismay, that was not the case. The implant records showed the cascading failure of brain function, and Lucy felt a lump in her throat. If Nellie had hesitated even a fraction of a second on allowing the upgrade…
Lucy moved on, skipping ahead to the first battle, only to frown and go back. There was a strangeness about how things were moving. When she saw the complete shutdown of the systems she had been responsible for, Lucy felt a twinge of guilt. She knew it would happen, but at the time Lucy planned to return at least enough to keep things ticking over.
She winced as she saw the crash of the Orb following Paren’s shuttle, and then could only look on in horror as Nellie was swallowed by the network, almost drowning in the unfiltered information. As time passed and she not only survived but also imposed her own will over the network, it changed.
Lucy had to admit that Nellie had to have been operating at near AI speeds to manage it all but noticed the rigid protocols and automated nodes lessening the load over time.
Right or not, Lucy could only feel pride as she saw Nellie master something so far beyond the scope of an ordinary human mind. She was just as amazing as Lucy had always thought. Maybe more so.
With context, the battle with the Imperial Line made a lot more sense, and Lucy felt that pit in her stomach get deeper as the sheer numbers arrayed against them kept increasing. Nellie had managed magnificently, sacrificing where necessary, to keep control of the battle and her people alive.
She witnessed the creation of the first Pilot Drone mid-battle and wanted to cheer the incredible ingenuity, which was so very Nellie, but couldn’t. The creation was only necessary because Lucy herself wasn’t there.
A chill swept over her as she saw how close they came to losing not just one but multiple ships. The losses of Cix-El and the others were so fresh, and they almost lost many more.
All because she wasn’t there.
That thought became a refrain as she examined the rest of the information, seeing Nellie shift one part of their tiny society after another to accommodate one thing. Lucy’s absence.
Knowing something, and understanding it are two different things. Lucy had known that much of their functioning relied on her; now she understood just how much of their operation was not just reliant on her, but built around her.
Lucy squirmed slightly in her seat, suddenly feeling uncomfortable.
Despite how it might have appeared, Lucy had carefully weighed her options before entering the gateway. She had balanced the estimated difficulties that Nellie and the others would suffer against the possible technological and strategic advantages that they might gain from the Silicates.
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When she was actually there, in a society so far advanced that it made even the I.E.S. look weak by comparison, it had been so easy to tell herself that her decision was not only right, but the best of all possible outcomes. That their gains, and her gains, would far outweigh any cost.
Now, she had to admit the truth. She had massively underestimated both the cost of her leaving and the amount of threat they had been under. Even dismissing the damage to Nellie personally and Paren’s unfortunate choice to not take a pilot with her—neither of which Lucy could have known before hand—the cost had been astronomically higher than she had imagined.
“We are now arriving at the Sparklight, Ma’am,” Pilot Drone said happily. “I hope you enjoyed the flight and have a pleasant day.”
“Thank you,” Lucy said, unsure if she should consider the drone an AI or not. It was nowhere near advanced enough, but she had seen many levels of intelligence in the Silicate world in their own creations, all of which were treated with equal respect.
She was still struggling to adapt, even still using the term AI, which she now knew to be a complete lie. She was, if anything, an SI—A Silicate Intelligence.
The Orb rippled aside as she exited, revealing a waiting honor guard of Centrums, with the Executive Officer, Boone, standing at attention with Wilkes next to him.
“X.O., it is nice to see you again,” Lucy nodded to him.
“It is Captain now, Ma’am,” Boone corrected her. “I am afraid I must ask for an Identity Check before you are allowed any further.”
“How do you intend to manage that?” Lucy asked, as amused as she was insulted.
“Paren has a recording of your mental signature,” Boone said smoothly. “A simple magnetic comparison will suffice.”
“Have you been in contact with the Silicate Representatives?” Lucy asked, shocked at the similarity to the methods used in the world in which she had been such a welcome guest. “Did they give you this technology?”
“Not as far as I know, Ma’am,” Boone nodded to Wilkes, who held up a wand and ran it down the front of Lucy, who felt the gentle magnetic field reacting to her own.
A light on the wand went green.
“Excellent,” Boone nodded. “Welcome back, Ma’am.”
“Thank you,” Lucy said icily. “I was hoping that Nellie would be here to meet me.”
“She would have liked to be, Ma’am,” Boone said, without even a hint of apology in his voice, “But the Marshalls discovered something only a few hours ago. The Queen was required to deal with it immediately.”
“Is she aboard her new ship?” Lucy asked.
“The Harbinger,” Boone noted, “No, Ma’am. She is currently on the Rest as she wished some privacy for your reunion.”
“Good, get underway immediately,” Lucy ordered.
An angry look flashed across Boone’s face, surprising Lucy, but not more than when she was escorted past the honor guard and not a single one of the Centrums saluted.
Lucy swallowed her hurt feelings; things might be worse than she feared.
===<<<>>>===
Nellie watched her hair arrange itself in the mirror before finally deciding it looked good enough. She noticed her hands shaking slightly and stamped down on her limbic system until the anxiety and anger were both under control.
Now was not the time for that. Now was a time to think clearly and not say something out of anger and hurt that she might regret.
“The Sparklight has arrived,” Salem called over the comm, “They are not docking but have sent an Orb across instead.”
“I’m on my way down,” Nellie said, taking a deep breath and striding for the door. “Where is everyone else?”
“Paren and Leah are both ignoring my notifications, but Robot is on the way to the dock,” Salem said. “Various groups have gathered, and a full honor guard is assembled.”
“What about you?” Nellie asked.
“Regretfully, Ma’am, I am needed here in the command center.” Salem lied.
Nellie knew she was lying but ignored it. She could not force matters, not without making things worse.
They had enough to deal with as it was.
The lift tube delivered her to the main floor, and she walked towards the small craft dock, finding a crowd had swiftly gathered. They parted to let her through, of course.
The honor guard saluted as she passed, and Nellie gave them a smile before taking her place at the front, between the huge forms of the Royal Guards.
This was her first chance to see the new body and get some kind of impression of Lucy.
The doors opened as she took her place and nodded.
Revealed within was a lithe form, hair like finespun copper falling around a face that was almost the same, but not quite. The eyes were different, and not just because the eyes looked like finely carved jewels. There was an uncertainty there, one Nellie had never seen before.
The skin tone was also darker, with more of a Mediterranean look compared to the paler one she had known so well.
Trumpets blared from the speakers all over the station as confetti rainned down. Nellie stifled a laugh when she saw every single bit of it was cut to resemble an asteroid. That was unusually funny for Salem, Baz must be rubbing off on her.
“Queen Lucy has returned!” Someone yelled, and the cheers redoubled as Lucy smiled, showing pale white teeth as she waved to the crowd.
She stepped forward in welcome but couldn’t quite manage to make herself walk over and hug her. Not yet, anyway. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to; she just couldn’t. A wall seemed to hang between them.
One that would need to be dealt with privately.
Lucy saw her and walked over, throwing her arms around Nellie in a fierce hug, which Nellie returned before stepping back, seeing hurt and shock on Lucy’s face before she waved the crowd to silence.
“Ladies and Gentlemen, I want to thank you for coming out to welcome Lucy home. There will be a proper celebration as soon as we can, but the war comes first.” Nellie said, forcing herself to smile brightly. “In the meantime, just know you can all rest easier knowing we are all together again.”
The crowd cheered, and Nellie led Lucy clear of the crowd and towards the nearest lift tube, with the Royal Guards keeping pace the whole way.
“Nellie, I—” Lucy started to say, but Nellie cut her off.
“Me too, but we need to talk in private, okay?” Nellie said, smiling to take a little of the bite out of her words.
Lucy nodded but looked pissed.
Well, that made two of them.
The moment the door to their apartment closed behind them, Nellie reached out to the nanites and established a seal, adding a scattering field as well to keep out prying sensors.
“That’s new,” Lucy said, the familiar voice sounding strange to Nellie without the presence in her mind to go with it. “You’ve learned a lot of new tricks.”
“Yeah, you too, I’d guess?” Nellie said, trying to keep the tone light and failing miserably.
“Some,” Lucy said earnestly. “But none of it was worth the risk I took, Nellie. I am sorry. More sorry than I can say.”
Nellie rubbed her hands over her tired face.
“No, we are not doing it like that.”
“What?” Lucy asked.
“Lucy, let’s sit down, okay?” Nellie said, offering a chair at the little table off to one side.
“Nellie, I—” Lucy started.
“Please, Lucy, just sit,” Nellie said, tiredness in every syllable of her voice.
Lucy sat somewhat reluctantly.
“Thank you,” Nellie sat down opposite her. “We do need to talk, but properly.”
“We always talked properly,” Lucy complained. “I don’t see why we should change anything.”
“Don’t you?” Nellie asked, anger flaring. “You have no fucking idea what changed things?”
“Nellie, I—” Lucy looked shocked, but Nellie held up a hand and sighed.
“See, that is why we need to do things like this,” Nellie said. “Calmly, without anger or hurt taking over and making us snap and argue.”
“Fine,” Lucy nodded. “Whatever you need.”
“Thank you,” Nellie smiled. “Now, the first thing I want to say is that I am glad you decided to come back. I really am. I don’t mean because we need you to help us, because we don’t, but because I missed you more than I can say.”
Lucy nodded and took a deep breath before speaking. “It upsets me that you are acting like there was a chance I wouldn’t come back.”
“I never thought you would leave me,” Nellie said simply, “After that, I found myself questioning everything for a while.”
“I never left you,” Lucy said angrily. “I just went through the gate!”
“And if you couldn’t get back?” Nellie asked.
“What?” Lucy asked. “Of course I could; they said it was fine.”
“Yes, but how did you know?” Nellie asked. “For all you knew, they were lying to you.”
Lucy blinked a few times and then just nodded, looking away for a moment.
“So, a lot happened while you were gone,” Nellie said. “And a lot of people changed.”
“It was only a few weeks,” Lucy said, shaking her head, “I can’t believe it all changed this much.”
“We did what we had to do,” Nellie said simply.
They talked for a long time, each explaining what they could to the other. It would have been nice to say that her plan worked and they didn’t argue, but that would be a lie. More than once, they ended up screaming at each other, both convinced the other was deliberately being obstinate.
Most of the arguments ended calmly, at least. That was a good sign. Just as things were finally winding down, and Nellie thought they were done, Lucy said something that stunned her.
“Now that I am back, I’ll take over the network again, take over those automated cruisers, and get us operating as we did before,” Lucy said, smiling brightly. “You wait; in a couple of days, it’ll be like I never left.”
“No.”
“What?”
“I said no, Lucy,” Nellie said. “We could definitely use some help on the automated cruisers and other ships, and I know you can build the new Imperium-class ships a lot faster than we have been, but we aren’t changing the rest back.”
“Give me one reason why not?” Lucy challenged. “I can do it better than….”
“Me?” Nellie laughed bitterly. “Better than we have been, or than I did?”
“I didn’t say that!” Lucy snapped. “I mean, I can do it better than that Bunny thing and better than that Pilot Drone thing!”
“Yes, you definitely can,” Nellie nodded. “And you can do a lot of things better than I did, I am sure.”
“Nellie—”
“But I did it the best I could,” Nellie continued, her voice rising. “I did what I could because you LEFT!” She took a deep breath. “But I know why you did, and I guess I understand it too.”
“You don’t seem to,” Lucy said tartly.
“I do, but that decision, even if I understand it, has changed things,” Nellie said, suddenly feeling exhausted. “It just has.”
“Go on then,” Lucy said, hands on her hips, “Tell me how it has changed.”
“I built everything around you, Lucy,” Nellie said. “Over and over again, I trusted you more than I trusted anyone, even myself.”
“And now?” Lucy asked.
“I won’t build everything around you now,” Nellie said sadly. “I don’t have that level of trust in you anymore.”
“Wow,” Lucy said angrily.
“I never should have done it anyway,” Nellie said. “It wasn’t fair on you.”
“What?” Lucy laughed.
“I know how much you did. Now. I got to experience it for myself.” Nellie wiped tears from her eyes. “It was way too much for anyone, even someone as advanced as you.” She stood and grabbed a cup of coffee just to have an excuse to look away. “No one person will ever have the power to bring us to our knees. Not again.”
“So that’s it?” Lucy said bluntly. “One mistake, and we are over?”
“I never said we were over,” Nellie growled. “I still want to fix things between us. I love you. I’m pissed and hurt and a little distrustful at the moment. It will pass if we work on it together.”
“But I’m not Queen anymore, right?” Lucy asked.
“Yes, you are,” Nellie frowned, “Why wouldn’t you be?”
“I don’t run the network, I don’t control things, I don’t do anything!” Lucy threw her hands in the air.
“You’ll still control plenty,” Nellie snapped. “Just not everything. You’ll have to be happy to be just like the rest of us for a while!”
“But I’m not like the rest of you, am I?” Lucy snapped. “I have to bow and scrape to win you back? Fine! I’ll do it. I’ll do it for years if that's what it takes. But to settle for a second rate solution just because you got your feelings hurt? Grow up!”
Lucy’s eyes widened, and Nellie turned, her eyes on fire.
“Second rate but reliable!” Nellie growled. “With built-in redundancies in case things go wrong.” She crushed the cup in her hand, nanite tendrils grabbing the pieces before they even hit the floor. “You want to talk about growing up? How about you grow up and accept you fucked up! Accept you treated us like shit! Accept that you can not swan back in like nothing fucking happened!”
“You’re right,” Lucy deflated. “I know you are right; it is just difficult for me.”
“It isn’t easy for me, either,” Nellie said. “None of this was.”
“If I can’t do what I used to do, how am I supposed to make it up to you?” Lucy asked. “Don’t you see that?”
“I don’t need you to do what you used to do. I just need you to be here,” Nellie said quietly. “I don’t want to go back to how things were. I want to find a new way, a better way. Together.”
“I need some time,” Lucy said, “Time to adjust to all this.”
“Seriously?” Nellie asked, “You want more time?”
“Yes.” Lucy nodded. “I need time, but I’m not leaving.”
“So, what?” Nellie asked. “Are you staying here in the apartment, or…?”
“No, I need to think,” Lucy said. “I need to be alone for a day or two, figure out how—”
“Alone?” Nellie asked. “Fine, Lucille. You got it.” She stormed over to the door. “You stay here and think about it; I’ll be on the Harbinger.”