What does it mean to be alive?

Some may philosophize a lot about it, though for the average person it is only the day-to-day.

My name? It doesn't matter anymore; after all, I will soon return to nothing. After reaching 97 years old, I don't know if I could consider myself lucky, especially in the part of the world where I live. I mean, maybe some people may consider it a blessing that I have had a long life, but it has many difficulties.

Not only that your body its showing its age, influenced by how unhealthy you have lived, but without any doubt, the greatest of all is loneliness.

It doesn't matter how many people one has related with or how many friends one has made, human life is frail. Illness, accidents, death, from the moment we are born the countdown, begins to run and many make it to the final line prematurely.

In my 80s I was left all alone; all my friends had already taken the last train and at my 83 it became increasingly difficult for me to fend for myself.

I think that, despite the number of sad faces that surround me at this moment, it must also be a relief that they should stop attending and helping me in every little thing. After a last look around the room, I feel that my conscience is slowly fading. These 97 years have been too long, it is time to rest.

They say that the one's final moments, your whole life flashes before your eyes. But since nothing was happening and I didn't want an anti-climatic finale, I focused one the last time and did a quick review of my life: born in a small country from a certain problematic part of the world, when I remembered that I felt that it was practically a miracle that I have reached such advanced age.

My family was of the middle class, my father had a small workshop next to the house so he was never absent and my mother only worked half a day.

In that sense I was a lucky child, I had a normal childhood and we never lacked anything, although there was no abundance either.

Elementary school was quiet; middle school was pretty much the same. In those days things like bullying were only seen in movies.

Wishing to test me and do technical studies, I missed my last middle school vacations racking my brains studying to attend a technical high school.

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I managed to reach the Top 10 positions, which allowed me to brag about it quite a bit during my life.

When I was finally getting ready to attend college, a devastating economic crisis began around this part of the world that threw my plans to the ground.

After a night of too many drinks with some friends and as a kind of group challenge, we decided to go and enlist together in the army.

Without a doubt and looking at it in perspective, that was the most stupid decision I made in my life.

Perhaps in a well-organized and professional army, one could be able to develop character, build camaraderie and forge a career.

But in the conscript army of a third-world country, you learn that the officers are God and the troops are only mud under their boot.

Only those lacking any pride and self-esteem have a good time.

Those whose only ability is to lick the boots of those above them.

But despite everything, it was quite fun.

We managed to stay together as a group of friends and to have the best time possible. I also learned to defend myself quite well, which allowed me to stand out in the many clandestine fights in which we got involved against the members of other units that tried to steal our personal effects.

Or who came looking for revenge for beating their comrades, or simple challenges with high stakes and very juicy bets in between.

After my little adventure in the army, I did many small jobs, from pizza delivery to newspaper sellers, occasional construction workers, and even walking dogs.

Until one day I received an offer from an acquaintance of my father, a certain international company was looking for a certain type of people.

The pay was very good but the risk was equal in proportion.

But the slow and monotonous life I was living was not for me, I missed the thrill of fighting when I was in the army, so I decided to accept the offer.

I knew my parents wouldn't like it, but I was already an adult and free to choose my own path.

To my great surprise, I only received a "take care of yourself" and "come back to visit us" from my mother, my father only gave me a stoic "may you do well".

After saying goodbye, I embarked on living the life of adventures I always wanted, turned into a Private Military Contractor; a modern way to referring to Mercenaries.

My first stop was Italy, the host country of the company I joined and it was there that I received training.

As I was already in good shape and had previous experience in the army, I quickly stood out from the rest of the recruits and became part of the elite group, which would become the Firefighter Corp as we were known, since we were always called to resolve urgent matters.

So I spent my next 30 years, traveling the 5 continents and getting involved in all kinds of situations, at the same that a large number of transcendental situations shaped the world.

From an almost Third World War, to one gigantic pandemic after another that shook the world.

We did all kinds of surgical work from rescuing hostages kidnapped by Mexican drug cartels, to storming pirate bases on the coast of Africa, and strenuous minor jobs such as escorting movie and music celebrities.

Despite my hectic days as a mercenary, I never stopped visiting my parents.

I met a good woman; we married and had lovely children. When I retired from the mercenary life, I started a small consulting business in my home country with my abundant savings.

And with the pass of time, I bought a nice house, very close to my parents' house. When my children grew up, they gave me grandchildren and in my later years, even great-grandchildren arrived.

And so although I have some regrets; things that could have been different, I can say that I lived a full life.

Even though I was baptized and raised as a Catholic, I do not profess any religion.

Let's just say that I was never attracted to the idea of depending on supernatural forces.

Although I learned that there are no atheists in the trenches when bullets fly past your head. Wherever you go next, heaven, purgatory, hell, I will face it with my head held high as I always have.

Or at least I thought it should be that way, but when I thought that I would close my eyes forever, I was awakened by a soft voice and a warm hug.