Adram and I ordered some coffee and breakfast. He explained to me how we didn’t feel the passage of time nor hunger and fatigue while in the void. Because there isn’t anything stressing the body, no pathogens, toxins, or pollution, no humidity, dryness or heat, the body isn’t constantly rebuilding and replenishing. No resources are being used because there’s nothing actively draining the body.

He clarified that we were still walking and have internal processes but the rate is extremely slow. That being said, upon exiting the void, our bodies which didn’t have any food or water or sleep, suddenly is thrown back into an environment with lots of factors and stressors.

“Almost starved to death the second time I went into the void. I stayed for two days without realizing it and survived by drinking the Blue Stein flower. I came back and passed out immediately from weakness.”

I was just nodding when he stopped for breath between sentences. I felt what he meant. I haven’t eaten since lunch yesterday and the hunger sensation that should have been warning my body was put on hold until our return from the void where it hit me full force.

“Coffee will help wake us up. I ordered juice, pancakes and eggs. We need sugar and protein to restore our body’s.”

When the food came we didn’t do much talking. Adram didn’t feel compelled to talk just to create conversation. He only spoke when there was something to speak on. I was content, focusing on enjoying the meal with my thoughts and processing the previous day’s experience.

He seemed much better off. He was used to pushing his body to extremes I realized. This was just another day for him, full of mysterious adventure and inexplicable situations.

I couldn’t help feeling something nostalgic wash over me. Eating breakfast in a diner, having just traveled to a place of unknown origins, being sleep-high and sitting here with Adram, who was secretive with his thoughts but honest and doing what he knows.

I’d hold onto this memory forever. I sensed a threshold was about to be crossed. Maybe it was the exhaustion and sleeplessness but a gnawing agitated me, grating against me like an itch you can’t find. I could choose to forget this day, ignore what happened and return to my life where things made more sense. My brain seemed okay with letting this trip fade from memory.

The itching warned me to consider this option.

Adram probably saw me grinning at my plate like an insane person but I couldn’t prevent the euphoric catharsis from squeezing out the last of my dopamine.

We were merely finished eating.

“Are you going to school today?” Adram suddenly asked. Reality, normal everyday reality I should say, doesn’t hold a candle to the absolute firework of exploring the horror and beauty of the void.

No wonder Adram has so little interest in school and learning people’s names.

“Yeah I have to. Test today.” I replied without even thinking. It is true I have a test today but I forgot about it. It seemed so trivial now.

“I’ll drop you off at school.”

“You’re staying home?” I finished drinking my coffee. I’d need the caffeine for sure.

“Yes, I have work to do. The Blue Stein won’t last forever.”

Makes sense. Otherwise that whole trip would be a waste for him. I wish I knew how to ask him if I could tag along but my exhaustion really dulled my usual wit and sharp mind.

Besides, my father wouldn’t care that I never came home last night, but he’d notice me missing a test or day of school.

“No need to drive me.” I told him.

“You sure?” he offered

“Of course. See you Friday?”

“I’ll be there.” He sounded more tired than I initially thought. I couldn’t even begin to imagine what he was working on.

We said farewell and parted. Adram went to his car and drove off. I decided to take public transportation. There would be a city bus doing rounds in a few minutes. I’ll ride it for a couple hours and stare out the window until I need to go in for my test…

Honestly Thursday was the blur I expected it to be once Adram left. Time zoomed by on the bus, even though I swore it had been hours of me and my thoughts up against that window with the backdrop of civilization.

When I came to school later in the morning for my 2nd period test, it was more thinking as I aced the test halfway into the class. It’s amazing how such a mind blowing experience puts things into perspective. I have no worries in this class, it’s inconsequential and so there’s no chance of my overthinking it.

Everyday knowledge just became easier because now I’ve caught a glimpse of an obscure absurdity, an anathema of normalcy and security. A thing which will haunt me, not in terror but in desire. I want to encounter the dual headed god of beauty and horror.

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One cannot exist without the other. A face without the touch of dread is an ugly flat form, a devil without allure is a tragedy.

I must have got some weird looks today. I did the best I could to look put together, but I was going off of no sleep and the last anyone saw of me was going off with Adram. Rumors were going to start bouncing around and this would only bring attention to Adram.

It is the nature of boys to turn into fools when they see someone new with a girl. Some evolutionary competitiveness I suppose. Adram will be offered friendship from the guys and when he ultimately rejects their invitations to hang out and join their groups, he’ll be shunned further and looked down upon. As for me, the guys will no longer have a problem approaching me since the fear of rejection or embarrassment is gone since they now don’t view me as obtainable, for the time being that is.

It’s all so predictable but that is the way we humans are. High school should be studied more by psychologists because it is the only place of its kind during the most formative ages.

It’s a bunch of horny kids desperately trying to be included and struggling with an individuality many will never see come to fruition. Angry, hormonal dodo birds running around a fenced off playhouse, trying to be king of the little rock at the center by wrapping a string around it.

How old were you when you learned to not play the king of the rock, Adram?

I was back home, having successfully zombied my way through the school day. In my bed now, I found myself wide awake to no surprise. It always goes like that I find. I didn't know where my thoughts were going or how they got to that point so I tried sleeping for the sake of my sanity.

Adram said I may dream of the void now. I hope so.

My alarm woke me up. No dreams.

I showered, did my hair, got dressed, ate breakfast and laid back in bed. I didn’t have the energy to workout this morning nor the patience to read. Finally the hour came where I could leave for school and see Adram. I was eager to plan the next adventure.

“Hey, Jienne.” I hid the disappointment on my face when I heard a voice other than Adram’s.

I turned to see Marcus. He was tall, another athlete, though he also had some of the best grades. He had a boyish face and thick eyebrows with long golden brown hair. I remembered a time not too long ago where my mother tried setting me up with him.

Hey, Marc.” I glanced back and saw Adram at his locker.

“So you’ll date a Satanist before me, huh?” The main reason I had discarded the idea from my mother was because Marcus was immature and whiny.

I can’t stand entitled brats.

“We’re not dating, not that it’s any of your business.” I retorted. “You should stick to freshman, they’re more your level.” I did take pleasure in tormenting him. He deserved it. He believed he was the smartest, most handsome boy in the school and that it was owed to him to be with his choice of girl. Unfortunately for me, that was me.

He tended to make this unattractive snarl when he got angry. He was making it now. “You think your daddy’s going to be happy you’re with a poor kid. He raised you better than that!” Because our mother’s were friends, he knew a lot about me and how to get under my skin.

It is true that my father married my mother purely for looks because he had money. I was raised to follow similar footsteps. Marry rich. So I’ve learned how to dine and dress and talk and behave in the company of wealth and power, cultured through travels and taught dance, cooking and beauty from a young age. My education had more to do with making me appealing rather than finding a long term career. My parents came from old money and so did Marcus’.

Was it an outdated lifestyle? Absolutely. But then rich people grew up at a quarter of the rate. That’s how it always is. If the rich get too complacent, they fall too far behind the times. Historically speaking that meant a revolt and several beheadings. In our current time, we were probably at least several generations from reaching that point of extremes.

I did not relish what my family had planned for me. I also could not control how or where I was born so there was no use in complaining about it. It was boring. Marcus was boring.

Where was the thrill in this? How can anyone live like that?

“Marcus, always a pleasure.” I said before turning and leaving. He pulled my arm back. He was significantly stronger than me and trying to show it.

I flashed a look at him. I was ready to put him in some pain.

He let go and chuckled. “I’ll see you around, Jienne.” Marcus left after that, presumably finding something funny.

“Want me to curse him?” Adram asked casually. He had snuck up behind me. Marcus probably saw him and left me alone.

“No, he’ll just come back angrier.” I said.

“Okay.” Adram really took everything at face value. If you said you wanted a demon to possess your enemy, he’d do it without needing a cause or explanation.

I stopped thinking about Marcus. “What comes next?” Our shoulder’s were touching as we walked.

“Well tonight I’m busy but tomorrow I’m helping an elderly neighbor with an infestation problem.”

“She’s haunted?” I asked, excitedly.

Adram smiled. “She could be.”

“Need an extra hand?” I volunteered.

“I’ll give you an address, you can meet me late morning.”

“We should exchange phone numbers.” I pull mine out.

“I don’t have a phone.”

Of course he doesn’t. Watch him say something ridiculous.

“Phone’s make you easy targets for certain entities.”

Called it.

I rolled my eyes. “Well Adram, I guess it can’t be helped. I’ll be there for the exorcism.” I promised.

“It’s not an ex-,” he stopped himself when he saw my satirical face.“Nevermind.”

“How did your thing go?” I was referring to his work yesterday, when he stayed home from school to do whatever he was up to.

“Nope. It’s on a need to know basis.”

It was my turn to see his snide expression. He probably didn’t care if I knew or not, he just wanted to mess with me.

My eyes narrowed but I didn’t say anything.

“See you later.” I said abruptly. I wanted to make him feel bad or that he messed up. I could hear him say something but then he decided against it. By then I was out of view.

I suppose I was satisfied with the interaction today. It was all a game and you had to win as many conversations as possible. The rules dictate that whoever finds themselves missing the other person more is on the losing end. If Adram spent the next hour thinking about how he wants to tell me something, I win that interaction. If I spend the next hour thinking about him, I lose that interaction.

A sixth sense tell me we both lost that one.