It's the first day I'm not someone of the expendables ones.
Expendables, that's how it was written in one of the mage's diary. They had hundreds of expendables. We had more and won. It seems like idiots die faster, but are useful.
Well, idiots are still idiots.
Anyway today was a tough first day.
The Big Boss called all the shamans into The Big Tent.
Goblins have tents, shamans have bigger tents, the Boss has The Big Tent.
It's made out of the skin of his prays, they say.
And it's big. I saw it, from in and out:
When we arrived in front of the tent, it seemed like a big house similar to the ones in the village, where I took my first book.
But The Big Tent had walls of many sticks and bones and skin covering the roof.
It is no tent, you must be a fool to think it is one.
And inside it was one big hall.
No more sticks, all was covered with bones, apart from the four logs holding the ceiling up.
The walls had skulls all over them, and a throne of armors and metal things were in the middle of the room. It wasn’t a throne like the one I’ve seen in one of the books. It was a pile of scrap worth of a king. Lots of loot from many battles.
On the top of the pile there was the Big Boss.
I was the first entering The Big Tent, and I went to the right, leaving space for the other shamans. And when they all entered, there was still a lot of space between me and them.
I sensed as if there were three sides: the shamans’, the Big Boss’, and lastly, mine.
“The new one?” Asked the Big Boss. He was clearly looking at me, seemingly entertained.
“Yes.” said I.
And he walked towards me. He had become even more fat after the battle. Damned fatso. When he arrived in front of me I was right at the height of his crotch, with my nose smelling a terrible stench coming from his back. I hate when something stinks more than me. And he sure did. He had almost all his teeths out of his mouth, as he was making an ugly grin.
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“You think: you smart because you take the hat.”
He glanced at me from above with the smirk of an idiot.
“He thinks: he smart! They always think like that. ” He said, and then laughed.
Whoah, the Big Boss is so stupid, he couldn’t even think without talking. And I, in front of that idiotic giant green monster, hate to admit it, felt afraid.
“I laugh, you see, because what you take with you are the Unlucky Hat and the Unlucky Staff.”
And he laughed again. The other shamans joined him.
“The new one. That’s always the name of that hat owner. This time won’t last a week!"
And they started laughing again.
Seems like I’ve got that Unlucky Hat, and that Unlucky Staff, why couldn't a shaman with the Luckiest Hat die on the battlefield, yesterday?
I mean, I surely would live longer with something better.
Oh I see, that’s why.
Anyway they all turned mute when the Big Boss spoke again. Damn cockroaches. There’s always a bigger one.
“Now shamans, teach him enough, so that he can be useful.”
As I was holding my breath he turned back, and walked to his shiny pile of scrap leaving his stench behind.
All the shamans turned to the entrance, in a procession of walking hats. As the last of them, an old one with “cunning” written in the wrinkles on his face, said: “As usual my Boss.”
I followed shortly after.
I didn’t know goblins could turn old, but I sure know that if idiots die faster, he is not an idiot.
Anyway as we returned to the shamans tents, all of ‘em apart from mr. cunning changed directions.
It was only me and him between the tents.
He stopped suddenly and started piercing my eyes with his stare. The only things I could see for a moment were his black and red eyes, and the wrinkles on his green skin right near them.
And then I heard the Voice: “Be careful… Do you know how to count? If so, count to 10 and then repeat.”
And I said: “Why not?” and then I started counting:
“One, two, three, four, six, seven, ten…”
“One, two, three, four, six, seven, ten…”
“Ah, stop at four for now, then I’ll teach you some math.” Said the Voice.
“One, two, three, four…”
Again, and again.
Until the shaman said something:
“My name's Gab Cunnin’. You will have lots of work to do. And with what I did just now, you’ll do it right after I say it to you. Now rest. ”
And I went to my tent.
I don’t really know what he did… But the Voice in my head says it's illusion magic. One that binds two by the name of the owner.
I guess I’ll have to tell him my name.
The voice is becoming clearer: before it seemed like when you say something in an empty cave, and your voice comes back many times, an echo, says the Voice.
Now it seems like it’s becoming one, with little noise.
Anyway, now he’s calling me.
See you later.
Gob.