A Sense of Accomplishment

The thought of going outside was scary.

Sure, I looked outside and thought it was pretty. You’d have to be blind to not think so. But I never left the yard. When I tried to take a step outside, memories flashed through my mind. Thoughts of the torment I went through, thoughts of the assault I narrowly avoided.

I had this nagging feeling in the back of my mind. Why hadn’t I become androphobic after that? I had shown all of the symptoms of it, especially during the early days. My father barely even considered me as his daughter, so I never interacted with him much regardless. But I wasn’t keen on speaking with my brother much after that.

But after a while, something happened. Because I stopped interacting with anyone in the real world, the only exposure I had to the opposite gender was extremely idealized. Because I couldn’t distinguish the stuff I had seen in eroge or manga from real life, I became sex-starved.

God, what a pitiful excuse for a human being. I couldn’t even dream of getting into a full-fledged relationship, so what made me think that some dreamy partner would swoop in and save me from my rut? It’s not like any boy or girl would even want to be near that pudgy, overweight woman anyway.

I simply wanted to pretend that my past wasn’t there. But it was, and it haunted me every single time I looked at the kids playing from outside my yard. In my past life, all I wanted was to be accepted. But I had thrown that away in favor of staying locked within the four corners of my room.

But this world was a place better than reality, that was my new reality. Yet I still couldn’t do it. No matter how much I told myself it was fine, the fear never went away. It was an irrational fear and I knew it.

It was so frustrating. I was so upset with myself.

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The graduation exam was going to be somewhere on the plains outside of the village. Couldn’t Roxas understand how afraid I was? Why was he so adamant about me doing this in the first place? He was someone I looked up to, yet he wouldn’t let up no matter what I said.

“O-outside?” I asked, my voice trembling.

“Naturally. Well, just saying ‘outside’ is an understatement. Saint-class spells could quite literally wash away an entire field of crops, kid. Shouldn’t be taken lightly at all. We won’t be gone for long, so don’t worry about it too much.”

I was at a loss. No matter how you looked at it, I was backed into a corner. It wasn’t like I could just casually tell him about my reincarnation. For one, he wouldn’t believe me at all, and it would take much too long to prove it to him. Knowing him, he’d cut me off before I could adequately prove that I was indeed from another world and write it off as a kid being scared.

But… when you looked at it that way… I was a kid being scared.

“Why? What’s the matter, Lumi? Something wrong?” Roxas pestered.

“Um, well…” I clammed up. I tried to wrack my brain for something, but I couldn’t come up with a good excuse.

Where did my ability to bullshit my way out of dodgy conversations go?! Right when I needed them, too!

“Ah, I see now. Zenith told me that you’ve never been out of the house before. C’mon kid, don’t be like that. There aren’t any monsters nearby, and if there are, I’ll strike ‘em down before they can reach us. Just trust me!” He said, beaming at me like a cat that had just managed to kill a mouse.

I shot him a look. Couldn’t have been farther from the truth, Mister.

He sheepishly shrugged at me and guessed again.

“Are you afraid of the horse, or something?” He asked me, seemingly grasping at straws.

I gave him a deadpan sigh and said, “No.”

“Don’t be like that now. You were so cheery during our last lesson, so what’s with the switch-up?” He asked, exasperated.

“Uhm… mood swings?” I meekly responded.

“Now you’re just making up terms to get out of it,” He said, picking me up by my armpits and plopping me on the horse. I tried to squirm my way out of his clutch, to no avail.

“Hey! What happened to consent is key?” I cried in injustice. My rights! I don’t know them that well, but I know you’re violating them somehow!

Roxas rolled his eyes. “There’s no point in arguing. I’d feel like a crappy teacher if I didn’t go this far, at least. Plus, what’s so bad about getting on a horse, anyway?”

I pouted. I didn’t want to go, but a part of me told me that if I wasn't forced to do it, I'd become a shut-in just like my last life.

“W-Well, if you insist…” I said, caving into his words. He chuckled at my expense as if someone told a mildly funny joke.

“What’s so amusing? So it’s fine for you to laugh at me but when I do it you get all moody, huh? Don’t see the logic in that,” I said, half-jokingly.

Double standards, my worst enemy.

“You know, Lumi. Sometimes you don’t act your age. It’s like you've lived several decades already. Is that just me?” He said, nonchalantly.

How did he… He’s probably just guessing blindly. No need to take this seriously. Err, I think.

“S-Stop avoiding my question,” I stammered out.

Roxas gave me an odd look and shrugged, and tugged at the reins to get the horse moving.

As we started getting closer to the gate, my heart rate began to pick up speed. I desperately kept hold of Roxas. I anxiously peered behind me as we left the house behind. We began trotting along a beaten-up dirt pathway, passing a few houses on the way.

I buried my face in Roxas’ back and tried to hide myself from the eyes of the villagers. Oh, god. They were staring. So many villagers were staring at…Roxas?

“Hey, Rox! Thanks for the help the other day! Here’s a little extra.”

“Roxas! Nice to see you, man.” I saw a few even bow to him. I opened my mouth in amazement. Just how well-known was he?

I knew he was contributing to many of the villagers’ lives, but was it to this extent? He was respected, and most of all, trustworthy. I laughed at myself for underestimating him. I knew I could rely on him–He was a good person at heart, and I felt that shine through his actions. I smiled at him.

“Are you still afraid, Lumi?” He said, breaking me out of my thoughts.

I cheerfully said, “No, I think I’ll be okay now.”

Now that I was composed, I could finally take in the landscape in its full beauty. I had visited Mount Fuji once in junior high, but even that paled in comparison to this view. Rolling hills covered the horizon. There were fields as far as the eye could see. On that rainy day, what I was experiencing now was something beyond my wildest imagination.

I let out a gasp. We came near a forest. It wasn’t one of those dense, scary ones, but one that put one at peace. It was nice. I hadn’t yet appreciated this village, and this was a breath of fresh air. I felt so alive while traveling outside. Various birds were chirping, and sheepdogs were frolicking around.

“You know, for all of its shortcomings, I’ve started to truly like this village,” Roxas said, with a smile on his face. I nodded in agreement, sharing the same sentiment as him despite never having left the house until now.

“Now that I'm seeing it for the first time, I want to look at it forever. Live in a tent or something out here.” I said.

We continued. “Mister Roxas, what kind of animals are people keeping here?” I said, to break the silence.

“Hmm, mostly Fittoan Buffalos and Asuran sheepdogs. I’ve tried the buffalo meat, and it's pretty good.”

I’d assumed that the wildlife was different from Earth’s, but it seemed to be oddly similar now that I looked into it a little more. Sure, the flora around here was different–for example, the Fittoa Region had a famous cash crop known as the Vatrius Plant. I’d never seen anything like it on Earth, but it was still grounded and not too overly flamboyant or anything. I wouldn’t be surprised if something like it existed on Earth.

I had a thought. What if this place wasn’t just “another world.” What if it was an alternate version of Earth, but with magic? That couldn’t be true, could it? I mean, everyone calls the sun “the sun”, but that name only ever came into existence because the Romans called it that.

Maybe it was just some quirk of the language around here, or it was just a byproduct of how I learned the language. Besides, this world was a little too out there to be a parallel version of Earth.

“I mean, it kinda doesn’t follow the laws of physics…” I murmured.

“What was that, Lumi?” Roxas questioned, having noticed my muttering. It was a bit quiet, so of course he heard me.

“Nothing much. Just daydreaming, I guess,” I responded with what was basically the truth anyway.

That aside, I wouldn't want to go down that rabbit hole just yet. I’ll wait until I get a hold of some star maps or something. I’m sure that the ‘University of Magic’ that Roxas mentioned would have something like that.

Now that we were talking again, Roxas seemed to take the opportunity to recount his story of how he picked up the job. The name ‘Asura Kingdom’ was brought up a lot in his tale. Now that I had nothing else to think about, I gave it a little thought.

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Medieval politics were nasty. I remember hearing that before. Assassinations, defamation ploys, kidnapped children, you name it. I didn’t want to be involved with all that. I’d end up dead or turned into a slave or something dreadful along those lines. It doesn’t sound very good for a “second chance at life,” if you ask me.

The conversation turned to Paul. I knew that he was a knight, but that was just about it. He had been deployed from somewhere to protect the village from stray monsters, and to clear out the neighboring dark forests which harbored several dangerous creatures. He was more or less the village mayor. That wasn’t too much of a surprise, but I didn’t expect Roxas to say that he was about the most powerful person in the village, be it in terms of physical prowess or otherwise.

Hmm. I subconsciously made a goal for myself that I would one day surpass Paul. I doubt I could beat him in a fight right now, though. I’d seen the way he sliced through boulders with a single swipe. Maybe one day, but that was still a bit far off.

The conversation grew still, and we were left in silence for the remainder of the ride.

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We arrived at a lone tree in a sparse, empty grassland. There was nothing but grass as far as the eye could see. Err, I take that back. There were mountains in the far distance. They had to be ginormous for me to be able to see them from here.

“I think this is a good place for the exam,” Roxas said, as he tied the horse to the tree.

“To demonstrate to ya, I’m going to cast the Saint-class spell ‘Violent Storm,’” Roxas continued.

“As I already said, Saint-tier spells are particularly dangerous to pull off, not just to others but yourself as well. This spell conjures up a bunch of gale-force winds and spreads them out over a large area, so make sure to hold on tight to that tree unless you want to be blown sky-high, alright?” Roxas asked, crouching down in front of me.

“Try to memorize the incantation while I say it. If you need some help with that, just ask. I’ll cut off the mana to my demonstration after a minute, but you need to keep it going for at least thirty.”

Gale force winds, he says. I remember watching videos of typhoons devastating cities, so I understood why we went all the way out here. I don’t imagine it would’ve been a good idea to do it anywhere but here. Now I felt bad for giving the boy a hard time.

He got up, dusted himself off, and then took a bit of a stance facing away from me. He peered back at me and motioned for me to hold on to the tree. I complied and placed a hand on the tree. I wouldn’t call that ‘holding on’ per se, but I wanted to have a good view of the spell. It wasn’t like I could do that if I were to hug the tree for dear life.

Roxas cleared his throat and gazed upon the endless plains that stretched before him.

“Now then. Oh, Spirits of the Air, lend your aid to me now. I pray and kneel before the magnificent winds of calamity. Grant my wish above all else and give thy servant a mere glimpse of your power. Let the winds spin, and the sky tremble. Come now, I speak the words of thy glory as you wipe away all of the mountains and rivers with your grace–Violent Storm!”

Roxas chanted with determination in his eyes. It took an entire minute just to say the incantations. The words coming from his mouth left me awestruck.

A moment later, I could feel the air thinning. It became a bit hard to breathe, but it was tolerable. The skies shined, and all of the clouds slowly grew closer. They began to spin around due to the wind that was picking up. The clouds turned into something resembling a whirlpool, and the wind almost knocked me off of my feet. I grabbed a hold of the tree and put all of my strength into not letting go. The typhoon’s eye became prominent, and all of a sudden, all of the momentum from the extreme winds ceased, and they were forced right… Through the eye.

“Amazing!” I cried, completely enthralled. What I hadn’t realized then was that I spoke in Japanese, not the Human tongue. Although, I wasn’t too worried about it. The winds did a good job of muffling my words.

A few moments afterward, the tree I was ‘holding onto’ began to be uprooted by the sheer force of the spell. Noticing this, Roxas yelped in surprise. The gusts of winds ceased, and the tree was left stripped bare of its leaves.

“Oh, crap!” Roxas said, rushing towards me. I had scratches all over my body. But frankly, I was more focused on how impressive that spell was to focus on the pain.

Roxas picked me up, and chanted, “Oh, goddess of motherly affection, close up this one’s

wounds and restore the vigor to their body—X-Healing!” All the scratches healed, and I stared at Roxas in astonishment.

“Whew! I’m sorry about that, kid. Could we keep this a secret?” he said sheepishly scratching the back of his neck.

Roxas was a serious perfectionist. He’d try to do everything as well as he could, and if it didn’t hold up to his standards, he’d do it over again. Even despite that, the boy was always stumbling, and near misses and scrapes like this were commonplace for him.

Despite his flaws, he did a lot for me. He planned lessons for me every night and tried to put on an amiable attitude so no one would make fun of him for looking the way he did. It was admirable.

I liked that about him. Maybe I’d propose if I was his age, but I had no such luck. “You don’t have to worry, I won’t tell my parents.”

“Thank you.” He said hesitantly. Roxas slapped his cheeks and got up.

“Alright, Lumi. Go and give it a shot. Don’t let me down, now.” I smiled and got up as well. Roxas uttered an incantation and created an earth fortress to protect the horse and himself. Why couldn’t you have made one for me? Jumped at the opportunity to show your clumsiness, huh?

All right, it was go time. What was the incantation? Err…

“Oh… Spirits of the Air, lend your aid to me now... I pray and kneel before the magnificent winds of calamity. Grant my wish above all else and give thy servant a mere glimpse of your power. Let the winds spin, and the sky tremble. Come now, I speak the words of thy glory as you wipe away all of the mountains and rivers with your grace–Violent Storm!”

I speedran the incantation and breathed a sigh of relief when the spell started forming. Having done it myself, I could understand some of the basics of the spell now.

The dense air from the clouds was separated from the moisture within. Said moisture evaporated and created warm air, which created an air current. Mana from the caster guided the current and made it into a typhoon-like structure, and then forced all of the energy through the eye of the windstorm in one, continuous gale.

This was all great, and I understood it. However, having to cast for thirty minutes straight was going to be a pain in the ass. I could find a way to keep the air circulating, could I not? I tried to browse through my 34 years of memories and ended up recalling something about how weather patterns work.

“Force the air into an area with…low pressure, and keep the amount of air in an area of high pressure at a minimum to keep it circulating…” Yes! So taking meteorology in my second year of high school wasn’t a waste after all!

In doing all of that, I burnt through my mana reserves. I prayed that the wind would stay at least the minimum amount I needed to pass before dissipating.

I met eyes with Roxas. He walked over to me, his clothes flapping because of the wind.

“This dome will disappear in about half an hour,” Roxas said confidently, “So we’ll be alright over here.”

I replied, “Okay!” I walked right over to him, stashing my new wand into one of my pockets.

Roxas raised an eyebrow. “Well, if everything’s ‘okay!’ then get back to casting, kid. You need to control those winds for thirty minutes, don’t you remember?”

Roxas looked at my puzzled expression. “What’s so strange about that? A Saint-tier spell needs constant monitoring and mana, otherwise, it'll disintegrate. We’ve been over this.”

I responded. “Yeah, I did that. It probably won’t go away now.”

“Eh? What do you mean…” He looked into the sky.

“Huh. Would you look at that? I should’ve expected something like that from you of all people,” he said pridefully. I smiled in satisfaction.

“Lumi, you pass.” He said hurriedly.

“Huh? It hasn’t been thirty minutes yet though,” I asked.

Roxas shook his head. “No kid, you gotta understand. That’s some amazing stuff you just pulled off. If you can do that, you're more than worthy of passing,” He replied.

“Well, you can dispel it now,” he told me.

“Er, right. It’ll take more than just a second, though, so just wait.” It took a bit, but I calmed the winds back to normal.

Once I was done, Roxas told me, “Congratulations, Lumina. You are now a Wind Saint,” he said. His hair was messy and his clothes were wrinkled beyond belief. He had a sheepish grin, one of which I hardly ever saw.

I remember all the opportunities I let pass me by in my past life. But now, standing here in front of Roxas, an unfamiliar emotion welled up inside of me. Yet, I knew what it was. It was a sense of accomplishment.

For me, this was the biggest step I had taken in my entire existence. And I only had Roxas to thank for it.

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The following day, Roxas was standing right outside the gate of our home. It wasn’t all that different from the time I met him for the first time. I was a little more grown up, but my parents didn't look too much older. One thing I found a bit off was that Roxas looked the same.

Surely he would’ve grown a few inches. Or maybe he was the type to get a growth spurt later on in life? I wasn’t too informed about how males grew, so I could only guess.

“Roxas, you’re welcome to stay, you know? I could teach you a few more things about adventuring before you depart,” pleaded my father.

My mother followed up with, “Even if your time tutoring our Lumi is over, the village still owes a debt to you. We’d be happy to have you here.”

He was already integrated into our daily lives, which didn’t just stand for me. My parents and Roxas had become close friends during the time he was tutoring me. He would help my mother make food from time to time, and he’d go out with my father to hunt monsters. He got along with them, and they grew fond of him as well.

“Zenith, Paul. I truly appreciate the offer, don’t get me wrong. But… I don’t know how to phrase this right, but–Teaching your daughter has been a bit of an introspective experience, is how I’d put it. I think I’ve got a long way to go, even as a Saint-class mage. I plan to wander the world for the next few years and see where fate takes me,” he explained.

“I see now. I’m sorry our daughter caused you to lose your confidence,” my father said sullenly.

Hey, couldn’t you have put it differently?

“Oh, no, it’s not like that in the slightest. Lumi is an impressive student and I would be lying if I said I wasn’t interested in seeing what she grows up to do,” he said, smiling.

Roxas pet me on the head. “I wanted to do my best to teach you, but I fell short.” I shook my head.

“That isn’t true, Mister. I think without you, I would still be casting intermediate-tier spells. So, thank you,” I said, trying to express my gratitude.

He gave me a friendly smile. “I’m happy to hear that from you. Also, I wanted to ask you something.”

“What is it?” I asked.

“I know this is a bit of a selfish request, passing off something I couldn’t do unto you, but please hear me out. If you ever meet a kid around your age here with green hair, don’t be afraid of them. They’re harmless, so don’t do anything to them,” he requested.

Green hair? Isn’t that… Well, I suppose if Roxas is telling me this, I should listen to him.

“A-Alright then. Where is this coming from?” I asked. It seemed a bit random, even by his standards. And that was saying a lot. One time, he went on a rant about how annoying it was to pluck weeds from the front yard.

“Ask them when you meet them, I guess. Sorry to be a bit elusive, but I think they could explain it a bit better,” he explained, yet not explaining anything in the process. I sighed and reluctantly agreed.

“Oh, right. One last thing before I go. I wanted to give this to you to commemorate your graduation.”

He handed me a pendant strung with a leather cord. It was made of a metal that shone with a green luster, fashioned in the shape of three interlocking spears.

“What is it?” I asked.

“That little trinket is an amulet made in my home village of the Migurd Tribe. I’m not sure if it’ll serve any practical purpose, but try to keep it safe. If you ever happen to visit the Demon Continent and you show this to any of the Migurd Tribes, maybe they’ll take you in for a bit,” he explained.

I took it from him, and said, “I’ll take good care of it then, Mister.”

He pat me on the head again and smiled warmly. Before I knew it, I started to tear up. Roxas had done so much for me. Putting aside all of his hard work, he brought me outside. He managed to pull me through my trauma and help me get over it at last. If I hadn’t met him, I'd probably still be fooling around inside, never to leave home.

He took me outside. That was just it, such a small act. And yet it meant so much to me. I could go outside just fine now. Because of him. I owed him a debt that I could never repay no matter how long I lived. He’s worthy of my undivided respect, and a man that I will forever and always trust.

As he walked away, I grasped the amulet. Everything he taught me, I was grateful for it. So, I decided to muster up my courage. I ran, and yelled, “Thank you, Mister!”

He took a step towards me, and said, “Let’s meet again.”

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I respected him so much that I stole a pair of his shorts. Hope he doesn't need those.