Is this weird author sick or something? So many chapters? Huh? How very uncharacteristic. Well, the effect of people that constantly talk about writing this or that or something else is what I would call this strange sickness~

Anyways enjoy this chapter and tell me about any mistakes that you may find.

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I turned my head in fury, still searching for the damned donkey when I spotted the beast turn a corner and disappear into the foreign streets of the mazelike city.

Immediately I exploded into action and rushed after the foul creature. There was no way I could just let it get away with trampling me! I ran swiftly and precisely followed the sound of its hooves on the stone street or occasional glimpses I caught of it when it wasn´t quick enough to reach the next corner.

In this way I was led deeper and deeper into the city which I didn’t even notice due to the fact that I had lost orientation a long time ago.

There was actually no need to chase down a mere animal to take my revenge but somehow I felt like the donkey had run me over on purpose. It was strange but my gut feeling is more often right than not in these matters so I trusted it without question.

More than once did I feel like the beast was leading me in circles and once I even spotted Blue and the others down the street but I was too out of breath to call out to them. They on the other hand must have been somewhat perplexed to see a donkey storm by just to find me hot on its heels.

I just hoped they wouldn´t follow along and kill my prey with magic. It was just getting fun and I´d hate to lose the game just like that.

I ran for what felt like a long time. The donkey was inexhaustible, something I couldn´t boast about. Soon the gap that I had worked hard to close was widening again and the times I saw the ass before it slipped around the next corner reduced as well. Merely the sound of its hooves guided me until even those faded away.

I ran on, unconcerned with the failure. If I couldn´t follow the donkey I could still randomly encounter it! Yet my stamina or lack thereof ended any delusions with a start as I was forced to a stop by the blinking energy bar at the periphery of my sight.

My mind was busily making stories up to cover for this blunder but none of them was good enough to satisfy my standards.

At the end of the rope I just chose a random bench by the side of the road to take a break. My rations were still sufficient for now so I quickly dug in and savored a sandwich with bacon and grilled cheese. Sadly there was no donkey salami...

In this way I just lounged about my bench, taking in the same scene of monotony as before. Boring artistic houses, boring stone paved roads, boring lamps. It was a scene of beauty and precision but it really did feel lifeless and after spending as much time as I did in this place where everything looked the same I could only think of it as boring.

After replenishing my energy I got up from my bench and contemplated what to do while randomly walking about.

Thoughts about rails entered my head.

Plan in mind I immediately acted.

"I like trains." I said, ready to dodge any incoming train.

But the expected outcome was not achieved. Where were the trains?

"Internet! Did you trick me?!??! Nooooooo!" I cried out loud enough to make an echo.

"Murphy, is that you?" an oh so familiar voice echoed from afar.

"No, of course not. How did you get the idea? I´m just a disembodied voice!" I shouted back.

"You damn kid, I looked away for ten seconds and you actually got lost!"

"I´m not lost, in fact. I think you´re the one that got lost!"

"Get your ass over here then!"

"The ass got away though..."

"That´s not what I meant and you know it. Can we stop shouting? My voice is getting hoarse."

"There is no horse here either." I could only imagine the sigh that must have escaped him right this second and evilly grinned.

I began to slowly walk away from Blue´s voice. Time to play some hide and seek.

"Are you walking our way?"

"No~"

"Why not?"

"You don´t have any cookies. Do I need more reasons than that?"

A brief period of silence followed and I used it to enter the next alley.

The one to shout next wasn´t Blue however.

"Murphy, just why are you doing this? I told you we have no cookies! Do you have to rub it in our faces like this?"

Unexpectedly Steven was the one to respond.

"You have been keeping secrets! I´m not an idiot you know~" I shouted and was referring to the cookie topic.

My voice was still as hoarse as it always was and didn´t waver in the slightest. It´s funny how a racial disadvantage can turn into an advantage in a situation like this.

Silence followed my statement and I wondered whether they were discussing something. Why were they so keen on regrouping anyways? Was there danger around? They surely wouldn’t have a shouting conversation with me if that were the case.

This made no sense but perhaps they just liked shouting until their voices sounded like that of a chain smoker or like mine. As if...

"It´s not like we wanted to hide it from you or anything!" Steven shouted. He sounded way closer than before.

I quickly rushed away from his voice and made myself scarce. Just when I was about to turn the corner I heard steps in the very street I wanted to enter. Without hesitation I backtracked stealthy as a ninja. A very loud ninja.

I entered a house for the first time in this city and looked around. It was bare. There was no furniture, no tapestry and nothing that hinted that anyone ever lived here. I mounted the stairs as quickly as I could, slightly dismayed by the lack of treasures and hiding places. The upper floor wasn´t any better but I could use the window facing the street as a vantage point.

No time at all seemed to pass until my lurking efforts were rewarded. Felicity walked by the house I was hiding in, clearly trying to find me. She was alone. Did they split up? No wonder I encountered someone when I was walking away from Steven´s shouting voice.

"Murphy? Helloooo?" Steven shouted from close by.

Felicity walked by without noticing me and disappeared around the corner of the street without a hitch. I smirked at this victory then decided to climb to the roof of this house for the better vantage point.

Sadly there was no stairway to the roof so I made my way out of the window. It was a dangerous task indeed as I had to jump from the windowsill and grab the edge of the roof in one go. For a moment I dangled there, while I was helplessly trying to pull myself up.

Alas I was no man of strength so pulling myself up proved to be pretty impossible. So I hung there, a story above the floor, my arms straining in an effort not to drop to the floor like an idiot.

It wasn´t that big of a drop, sure, but still enough to sprain an ankle or even break a leg if I messed up the landing. If experience had taught me anything then the fact that luck was seldom on my side.

For a second I even thought of swinging myself back towards the window but then I´d have to let go of the roof and hope my aim was true. If it wasn´t I´d get to know that wall quite intimately if you know what I mean.

I just kept dangling in indecision for a while. My arms were growing weaker though and I knew that I´d have to let go eventually.

Just when I had resolved myself to take the fall a voice called out.

"How´s it hanging Murphy?"

It was Midas, that pretty boy. Even without seeing him from my current limited view I knew he was struggling not to laugh too much.

"..."

"What? Speechless for once? Not even a 'help me'?"

"Go way." I hissed. Normal talking was already impossible in this exhausted state of mine.

"I´ll make it easy for you. If you get out of my sight I´ll help you down there."

Stolen story; please report.

"Huh?" What did he mean by that? Midas sounded quite harsh.

"You heard me. I want you to leave our group and just ... go away. "

I let go of the roof and plopped to the floor before Midas could intervene.

"Ahhh." I grit my teeth in pain. Falling simply wasn´t my specialty. This time around my right leg was injured. Whether it was broken or just sprained wasn´t clear just yet but it didn´t matter to me. I looked around and spotted Midas and his eternally silent archer friend Eisul only about twenty meters from me.

"Ahh~ seems like there is no need." I smirked through the pain and slowly got up.

"..." Somewhat stunned by this display of stubbornness he didn´t answer.

"What´s your problem with me, mage?“

"Suit yourself. I´m not dumb enough to fall for that trick of yours."

"Trick?" I asked intrigued.

"There you are!" BlueSky, Felicity and Steven chose this awkward moment to turn the corner. Midas just 'tsked' and showed a friendlier expression than before. Eisul kept glaring at me for a moment but eventually settled on a more neutral look.

With this thought settled I turned to the other group members.

"Hey there heretics of the cookie cult."

"...why is your leg bent in such an awkward angle?"

"What are you saying, isn´t it always like this?"

"Ahh, you´re right! I guess Steven won´t need to heal you then."

"WAIT. Steven, please heal it... I´ll even forgive you for keeping the cookies a secret!"

I practically begged and a flash of surprise crossed everyone´s faces.

Steven shrugged the surprise off and healed my injury.

"Ahhhh, sweet relief!"

"What do you mean by cookie secret?" Felicity asked.

"Huh, don´t act so innocent. I know that Steven actually had cookies when I asked him about it before. You know what, keep them. Take them as a payment for this treatment. But I´d prefer it if you didn´t keep any candy related secrets from me in the future."

They were eerily silent for a moment until Blue elbowed Steven.

"Oh, umm yes. I´m sorry about that. I saved them for Felicity, you see."

I nodded sagely as if I hadn´t just paid him for his healing with cookies that belonged to him in the first place and were most likely already eaten.

"Anyways, did you find anything interesting while I was... occupied?"

"You mean while you were chasing innocent animals and falling from roofs?" Midas asked dryly.

I gave him a glare.

"While I was avenging myself and tried to find five little kids that got themselves lost~"

"Seriously, where did you pick this idiot up?" Felicity asked BlueSky somewhat uncharacteristically.

He just laughed and left it at that.

"He seems to have only two modi. Either he´s smug about something or he´s pouting!" She continued her rant.

"Careful now woman! You wouldn´t want your Steven to accidentally drink a love potion and fall for a donkey, right?"

"You wouldn´t dare and it wouldn´t work either."

"Maybe he likes ass~"

She looked at me blankly until she understood the innuendo.

"... you .... you!!!!" No words to express herself with the frustrated ram horned woman could only blush.

I lightly chuckled and turned back to Midas.

“Is there a reason why you guys wanted to regroup?” I said with an especially friendly smile towards him.

“Actually, yes. We wanted to see where you found a donkey in a place like this.” He answered and seemed almost humiliated by the fact that he had to ask me for help.

“Oh, that. Did you guys see that fountain with a statue of a donkey and mermaid?”

They nodded as expected.

“I found a mechanism that brought the donkey to life. Don´t give me those looks. It´s true. I´m not kidding you.”

The looks in their eyes told me everything I needed to know about my own credibility.

“Let´s just take a look, ok? Does anyone know the way towards the fountain?” I asked.

“In a structured city like this one would have to be an idiot not to know the way. Let´s go.” Felicity said and took the lead.

I just smiled and tagged along. Revenge would follow in due time~

Felicity navigated what looked like a maze of houses to me as if she had lived here her entire life. She easily lead us towards the fountain and there it was. A simple round water pool without statue laid before us and just when I was about to rub that fact in her face I noticed that the mermaid statue had disappeared as well.

“Oh no…”

“Lalalal~”

“Damn. Why didn´t I see it coming?”

“Lalalala~”

As the others around me fell into a trance my head stayed clear.

“Where are you, siren?” I called out to the mermaid that had most likely done as the donkey did before.

“A siren? Where?” Felicity asked cautiously. She shaking Steven to wake him up but he remained dazzled.

Wait what? Why was Felicity not enchanted?

I blinked slowly and stared at her suspiciously.

“Lalala~” The siren kept singing without interruption. It was clear that Felicity wasn´t the singer but that didn´t mean that she didn´t have anything to do with her.

“Say Feli, have you been to the beach lately?” I probed.

“What did you just call me?” Her eyes began burning with primal anger.

“I called you Felicity, as always.”

She kept the glare up for a few more moments then returned her attention to more important matters as I sighed in relief.

“How can we free them? You said a siren is enchanting them, right? Aren´t mermaids and sirens the same? Is that why you´re not affected?”

“Yes, it´d be disastrous if mermaids enchanted themselves while they sing. We have an immunity to mermaid and siren songs. That doesn´t mean they are the same. Just similar. Comparing a mermaid to a siren is like comparing elves and beastmen: Kinda similar but one is more crude and tribal while the other is elegant and arrogant. By the way, how are you resisting. Are you by chance part mermaid?”

“Yes, can´t you see the resemblance? My scales and the blue skin?”

I looked at her with newfound respect. She didn´t seem so dull anymore! Of course she had neither scales nor was she blue for that matter. Her ram-like horns proudly curved at the side of her head and made it clear that she was most likely some sort of beastman.

“Let´s just ask the siren to stop for now. If she surrenders peacefully and calls the donkey over I´ll let her go.” I grinned.

“Why would she? And shouldn´t we rather ask her how she ended up as a fountain statue?”

“Trivialities~ If I always asked after backstories I´d never get out of the drama scenes. She should ask her about the treasure though. “

“Murphy, I don´t think there is a treasure here.”

“How come?”

“Have you looked inside the houses? They are empty. All of them. I doubt even a mermaid that might have been petrified for centuries and used as a fountain statue would know about a treasure in this place.”

“She´s a siren, not a mermaid.”

“That´s beside the point.”

“Schhhh” I held a finger to her lips and stopped her from talking.

“Do you hear that?” I looked around frantically.

“What is it?” She joined me and we soon stood back to back, the others were still dazzled.

“She stopped. Where is she?”

“Over here~” A sweet voice called out from inside one of the houses. I could only see a fishtail wave at us from a window.

“How did she get there?”

“Can she even live outside the water?”

“Of course she can. She´s basically like me without the legs.”

We exchanged glances and proceeded towards the house. The rest of our party was left behind for now as they would only be easy targets for the siren if things got hairy. Besides, we didn´t even know whether she was as evil as the donkey, right? I couldn´t just attack a sweet little siren without provocation.

I took the lead and entered the house… or not.

Just when I opened the door it was slammed back into my face. I stumbled backwards and grabbed my nose.

“How dare you enter a ladies house without knocking!!!”

“…”

“…”

“I can definitely see the family resemblance.” Said Felicity and started laughing at my miserable expression.