“Employment?”
“Yes Ernest, we would like to be coworkers.” Frank grinned as he straightened his back and fixed his suit. “Can I call you Ernie, Ern?”
“You can call me Mister Montgomery.” I crossed my arms and scowled. “And please can you give me one good reason for me not to pick up my gun and shoot both of you right in this kitchen?”
His grin dimmed, a thin smile resting on his face. He raised his hand. “I can give you two.” He raised his fingers. “The first is you don’t have a gun.”
“A licensed gun.” I retorted.
“Any gun.” Frank corrected, his hand still up.
“Ever.” Cedric complemented while engrossed in his newspaper.
I couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow. “And the second reason is?”
It felt strange. I could see his brown eyes probing into mine. He lowered his arm and put his hands on his pockets. There was something else behind his aloofness. His friendly approach caught me off guard even in this unusual situation. I made a mental note to not let it happen again.
“We’re probably your only chance of getting powers in this life.” Frank stated.
“The wonders of meritocracy and the corporate life.” Cedric sighed, flipping the pages.
No words came out of my mouth, the only thing I managed was to stutter before I composed myself and took a breath. My heart was pounding fast and I could feel my ears throbbing. I chuckled, shaking my head before asking the only thing someone can ask in this situation.
“Really? Then prove it.”
Frank walked until he was in the middle of my living room. He looked around the room before snapping his fingers. A door appeared right in the middle of the wall. Nothing crumbled, no dust, no sound, no light. In one moment my bare wall was there, in the next a round vault door was perfectly placed inside of it. A ten foot tall black vault door with silver engravings in it.
The thing had a distinct hum. There were many wheels and mechanisms turning and spinning at all angles. I turned to Frank before I heard a distinct click, the door opening slowly. My foot hit the back of the wall as I catch myself gasping. At the corner of my eye, I see a child sized creature with leathery skin with a long nose, sharp and crooked teeth filling his mouth. His skin was a sickly beige and his big round eyes looked inquisitive yet calm. He was wearing a strange outfit that looked like a mixture between a mail man and a boy scout.
I’ve seen many creatures on TV since superpowereds began to appear, but seeing it with my own eyes was a mind boggling experience.
“Frank, Cedric.” The creature greeted them.
“Bobby.” They greeted him in return, their voices in unison.
“We need the contract.” Cedric asked.
“New guy?” Bobby inquired, pointing at me.
“Hope so.” Frank responded.
“Are you Jewish?” the creature asked, looking at me.
“No.”
“Good.”
My eyes darted between Frank and Cedric, but they both shrugged.
Bobby took a device out of his pocket. His long fingers dexterously clicking at a seamlessly solid steel ball that shone with writings and patterns as he touched it. When the alien was done the ball opened up forming what I could best describe as a book. The tome was far bigger than the device it was put in and it was made of metal with a certain steampunk design to it. Wheels like you would find on a clock filled the modern contraption. Not unlike the steel door in my living room. This device also hummed with the same tone as the door, perhaps an octave higher.
Pringles barked at the strange machinery before being lifted by Cedric who promptly scratched his ears.
Bobby stood beside the book, hands crossed in front of him waiting for my decision. I licked my lips trying to find something to say. Frank interrupted my musings.
“By now you know that regardless of who we are, we are not normal,” his tone was warm but he held an intense gaze. “You probably realized that you can not fight against us.” As he said that he lifted his hand and opened his palm, a flame as bright as a comet appeared, he let the little devil go and it obediently circled my living room without singeing a single thing before going back to his other hand and vanishing as if it never happened. “But we are not here to make you an offer that you can’t refuse. If you don’t want anything to do with this business, you can just walk away. No harm, no foul. I promise,” He said gravely.
I pondered for a little bit before responding. Given the ludicrous situation I thought it was better to keep it simple. Whatever was going on it seemed to be something far greater than I could grasp.
“I’m curious about it, so just give it to me straight. Perks and cons. Don’t sugar coat it, please.”
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“We work for a intergalactical firm known by many names, but here we are usually referred to as The Company. We offer our services to the intergalactic communities at large and we offer contracts for you to fulfil, Ernie.” His posture was relaxed, his words carried with ease. “If you succeed you get to buy enhancements to improve yourself, you buy enough of them you might become something.”
Despite the ringing in my ears I kept throwing questions at him.
“And if I sign with you and refuse to take any jobs?”
“Regulations state that you must take at least one job per decade. If you don’t I would incur some loss, but no harm would come to you. Some guys do this part differently, pressing their agents, but that’s not how I do it.”
Frank had his chest out and his shoulders back, perhaps proud of the way he treats his agents.
“So you would be my boss?”
“That’s correct.”
“And him?” I pointed towards his partner.
Cedric cleaned his mouth with a napkin and buttoned his suit before getting up. As he did so I realized how tall he was, probably six foot two, maybe six foot three. This and his smooth head made for a striking figure.
“I would be more like a mentor, Ernest. I am here to help.” He put both hands behind his back and looked me dead in the eye as he said it.
Touching my temple I responded with closed eyes.
“If I agreed with your proposal, what kind of contracts would I have to do?”
Frank shrugged. “It varies. At first you would be just our representative on Earth and you would have to go to meetings. Pretty easy standard stuff.”
“But it doesn’t pay well,” Cedric added.
“After you get some enhancements you would have a myriad of options. Painting, sculpting, interpreting and so on. This is one of the most artistic planets to enter the market in the last few centuries.”
I wasn’t convinced of what he just said. Strangely, despite not being fit, his eyes were too sharp for such mundane occupations. Crossing my arms, I decided to cut to the chase.
“What kind of contracts do you guys take?”
“We are bounty hunters, Ernie. We chase criminals throughout the galaxy.”
“And I don’t have to follow your shoes?”
“You are a free agent. We are here to give you advice and we get a small commission from your completed missions, small or big. The conversion process can be-”
“I will do it. Sign me in.”
I didn’t have much to go on, but somewhere along the line I realized that it didn’t matter. There were several hints that I could put together that would help me make my decision. They chose to be courteous and respectful when they didn't have to be. I am a widowed seventy two year old retired teacher with nothing to lose. But that wasn’t it. The truth was if this situation happened a thousand times, I would say yes every single time. At the bottom of my heart I knew it, I am just that goddamn greedy.
“That was fast,” Cedric responded.
I sighed. “Not much to lose really.”
For a brief moment the room was completely silent. We could hear children playing on the streets, the birds chirping in the distance, but whatever they thought about my response they decided not to comment.
“Please Ernie, put your hand on the book,” Frank said softly.
As my hand pressed the cold steel book, the entire room changed. The light seemed to dwindle until only darkness was left, ignoring the morning time. The individuals in the room remained visible, highlighted like subjects of an invisible spotlight. Stars and symbols appeared right beside Frank. At the other side of the room, the same strange projection appeared beside Cedric. They all had their backs straight, their faces solemn, including Bobby.
“I, special agent Francis Orion Carruthers, Honorable Judge of the Zarthanian Constellation, using the authority invested in me declare that Ernest Montgomery is from here on out an Agent of the intergalactic enterprise The Company. As such he is now subject only to the laws of said firm and The Intergalactic Statute for War Crimes.”
“I, special agent Cedric Lowell Cuningham, bear witness.”
“The ingenuity to innovate and the will to persevere,” they all chanted at the same time.
As soon as I heard the words the book locked my hand. I was completely frozen, not even able to blink. The tome released a viscous silver liquid that slowly crawled up my arm, spreading all over my body. It felt warm. I didn’t panic until I felt it entering my ears, nose and mouth. It was too late now.
“Brace yourself, Ern,” Frank warned.
Whatever was running through me was ingraining itself deeper and deeper. Every organ was reacting to this substance and when it finally reached my brain I saw everything. An unending movie of faces, objects, planets, sounds and smells, all moving at the speed of light. My mind couldn’t comprehend how to cope with millions of perspectives living inside of it. They were taking turns like poneys in a carousel. As one dipped another one rose bringing me joy, hatred, sorrow, love, sadness, just to start all over again. It seemed never ending.
In the beginning I was afraid I would lose myself. After a very long time I was struggling to remember who I was, who I truly used to be before this wave of scenes started circling inside my head, endlessly watching, until the images started to change. Slowly I could see fantastical places. Forests with colors unknown to me.
The emotions were becoming scarce as those sceneries took the place of people, until there were only places. Sometimes deserts, sometimes fields, sometimes cities, but never again people. I didn’t know how much time had passed. Eventually those scenes also transformed.
For a long time I would see deserts with other sceneries in between, slowly I started getting worried, dreading the future when I was in a place that had any color to it, hating the sand when I spent centuries being aimlessly. So much time waiting for the seasons to change to escape the unending dunes. Longing to feel the humidity of the rain in my hair, the coldness from the snow seeping into my bones. But more and more often dust became the only presence. Their grains were first a foreign thing, but after enough time they were the only thing I knew. I couldn’t remember anything else. No sense of self. No humanity. No change.
The tides of time washed away even the resemblance of a memory. I didn’t have whims, volitions or moods. A forgotten object, simply there among the dunes of time. I was at peace for as long as I could remember and then I was right back in my kitchen.
Tears were rolling down my face, freely. My body shaking uncontrollably. I didn’t know if I was relieved or sad. It felt so cozy to not have to be but at the same time it felt so dull. To go back to this world just seemed so violent and abrupt in comparison. It was too much. Everything was too much. The cold floor was torture. Every color was blinding. Every sound was violence. I was afraid I was going to lose my mind all over again. I couldn’t stand even the fabric from my clothes touching my skin. I couldn’t take it. My head, my eyes...
A light touch grazed my elbow and everything went black.