[Past]
Nicoash made her way to the docks the moment she was able to sneak away from Jarik. The dock was the biggest and oldest part of the city, standing in the very center like the trunk of a tree. The building’s age was clear as much of the metal had rusted, but it clearly wasn’t built properly to begin with. It was a miracle that it still stood at all. It was in dire need of an upgrade. Nicoash glided through the loading bay with practiced precision. Many of the dockworkers knew her well at this point, and it was easy to avoid running into her. A few even gave her a nod as she passed.
She reached a corner far away from prying eyes where most never bothered to go. She walked up to a section of the wall that was particularly rusted and broken. She wrapped her fingers around the metal sheet that barely clung to the wall and pulled it backwards, opening up a little hole. She then climbed inside and pulled the sheet back over.
Inside, the wall was filled with dusty wires and flashing lights. Nicoash stood and looked up where a small shaft continued upward, ferrying the bigger wires to other parts of the docks. She reached up and grabbed a wire, pulling herself up until she could reliably push her back up against the other side of the wall. She used the wires to climb up the shaft and into an open section a few dozen feet up. Clearly this section was meant for maintenance, but few people bothered at this point.
Nicoash walked a bit further in until she found an open part of the wall overlooking one of the docks. Nearby, there was a pile of blankets, a couple of trinkets, and a datapad loaded with a few books that Nicoash had gotten for her birthday. Nicoash walked up to the opening and peered out of it to see Vynn’s ship still docked. She looked around the dock until she found what she was looking for.
Vynn walked into the dock, followed closely by one of the dockworkers carrying a big crate. He looked down at his datapad, pointing toward his ship for the dock worker to keep walking.
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The dock worker turned to him as he walked. “So, you seriously left her back there?”
Vynn chuckled at him and shook his head. “‘Course I did. I didn’t want her nipping at my heels while I’m trying to leave.”
Nicoash’s heart sank as she listened. She swallowed the lump in her throat and kept watching as the dock worker came out of Vynn’s ship a few minutes later.
“But, leaving her with the pirates?” The worker brushed his hands off.
“The kid will be fine.” Vynn waved his hand dismissively as he lowered his datapad and started walking toward the ramp. “Besides, I’ve imparted the last bit of wisdom I can offer her.” He stepped up the ramp and turned around, raising his hand to rest it on the opening above him. “Be careful who you trust.”
Nicoash started breathing more heavily as she stepped away from the opening. Vynn and the dock worker continued chatting for a while longer, but she didn’t listen to a word of it. She just stood there with the growing pit in her stomach. The only thing that was able to rouse her was the sound of the ship’s engines roaring to life. She stepped up to the opening again and watched as the ship slowly lifted off the ground and started its ascent into the atmosphere. Soon, the glow of the engines faded to nothing in the sky. He was gone.
Nicoash let her gaze drop again. She turned away from the opening and walked over to the pile of blankets. She collapsed onto them and went limp, staring up at the ceiling.
He was really gone. Not only that, he left her. He didn’t want her. She wasn’t good enough. She would never be good enough. She was just a little farm girl on a backwater planet. No one would ever want her. She was stuck there. She was stuck there forever. The rest of the galaxy felt further away now than it ever had. She was trapped. She was locked away in a prison, surrounded by people who told her to be thankful for it. Everyone told her that she’d grow out of it. She’d grow to love the prison, or at the very least accept it. It felt like Nicoash’s whole world was collapsing at that moment, but no one would ever take that seriously. No one would understand what she felt. After all, she was just a kid.
Nicoash spent hours laying there, spiraling further and further into despair. It wasn’t until the sun shone through the opening, blinding Nicoash momentarily, that she was able to come back to reality. The sun was setting, and she still hadn’t gotten what she promised her father.
“Fratz…” Nicoash muttered under her breath as she sat up. She took a shaky breath and pushed herself up to her feet. If she took any longer, her parents would probably explode. She left her hiding place and walked back into the city.