EGOCENTRIC
DEFINITION
thinking only of oneself, without regard for the feelings or desires of others; self-centered.
"egocentric loners with an overinflated sense of self-worth"
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DATE - JULY 3RD 2015
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"Hey-hey, Alvis!" Tabby's chipper voice pitched after the door screech to our chambers "We gotta get you outside, my guy, we only have a few hours of sunlight left!" She poked me, and I lightly gargled. I looked around and saw Tabby with a low-to-ground trolly.
Had I passed out? How long for? It was frequent for me to fall asleep if I was watching through someone who was also about to drift to sleep. But passing out was unheard of for me to copy as well, usually, I just got kicked out of the vision. Though, not many soldiers pass out on the spot for me to verify that.
I checked my skin; dry and shriveled. I hadn't gotten any sustenance for days. With my leftover strength, I pull myself onto the trolly. Tabby pulled my arm as a weak attempt to assist. Once on the wheeled device, I coil in my tail and let Tabby begin her pursuit out.
The excitement of the past few days had left me malnourished, I had even forgotten I needed sustenance. As I do not have a mouth, my skin absorbs all its nutrients, water and food and all else. I have been referred to as a flower by Tabby before, and a vegetable by soldiers. Though I cannot think of a vegetable that by itself photosynthesizes.
Instead of heading out the front of the facility and just been laid in the sun, Tabby pushed the trolly into the darkest hallway of the Moth Mound. where the lights started to flash and the newer white paintwork had ceased.
All that was in this short hallway was the dingy elevator. Tabby stretched up to press the button which brought the elevator down while we waited, my gills gargled in protest, which Tabby noticed, "Oh yeah, the electric fence is busted it turns out." Tabby shrugged, and as she was about to continue, the sound of the elevator's horrified, rusted screams started as it moved for the first time in an estimated twelve years.
Tabby groaned as volume meter appeared on her face as her annoyed groans got louder, the bar on her screen grew. At full volume, she continued, "We can't go near the fence!" She yelled, "So we're gonna go to the roof!" She explained, her hands cupped as if it would somehow project her voice better.
I counted the seconds of how long the elevator took. It took forty-eight seconds for the elevator to rise from the forgotten depths of the basement. The doors screeched open, and the memories came back. The memories I could practically smell.
The yellow bars to hold you in were rusted, chipped and visibly weightless. Rotted boxes had still been left behind in the cruelly lit room. The lights had grown mold and moss, though I could not complain as it was a shock the lights even worked.
Tabby wheeled me in, careful to avoid the rusted pulley that centered in the elevator, which took up a third of the space in the already cramped room. The elevator was somehow both claustrophobic and Agoraphobia as you could see empty walls across both sides where darkness quickly swallowed both sides. Thankfully, that was only visible on the lower level.
The lower levels that reeked the elevator, and you could practically hear. Tabby stepped over to the control pad which featured a red button, an up button, a down button, and the 'close door' button. Tabby pressed the up button for less than a second and the elevator jolted grossly which made Tabby shriek, and myself gargle and find the strength to panic.
"I-" Tabby paused for a moment, "Forgot you need to hold the stupid button!" Tabby slightly ranted before she held that button and the elevator began to move upwards loudly, which sounded expectantly worse from the inside.
Tabby's screen lingered to me as she seemed to somehow emote the same indescribable pained emotion I was going through. This elevator is the worst thing in this Mound, with what it leads to being a close second. Thankfully, we weren't headed there though.
The next seventy-two seconds grueled as Tabby held a button and I listened to the screams of rusted metal. But once the sound had ceased, a rubbery cry of tires replaced it, which caused Tabby to scream in shrill.
She stopped as quickly as she started, her screen turned to the panel, then to me, "I think we're here." She said with haste, quick to click the green button and scurry over to me. She grabbed the trolly and refused to wait for the door to open completely before we were both out of that godforsaken elevator.
Tabby groaned in relief as she hobbled around the trolly and in the lead, the roof key in her hand, the rope swung around her finger. Then she stopped as she saw it, but Tabby didn't state what she saw for a good second, "Did Naya whack the doorknob?"
She was right, the doorknob was gone; just a hole of where it would have been. It left the door to awkwardly swing back and forth with the wind.
I gargle, a few of my eyes squinted. Naya didn't leave through the roof, and there's a broken window to prove it. Tabby just watched me as if I'd be able to audibly tell her. Her shoulders shrugged, as she tucked the keys into her skirt pocket.
"Alrighty!" Tabby chirped, happy to skip back to the trolly and push it out the broken door, and it that moment I realized how much I missed the sun, even if it was low to the ground. My eyes took a moment to adjust to the natural light.
My eyes had closed, and I heard Tabby approach me before she placed something on my head. I opened the eyes that would not be affected by the new foreign object. As I didn't expect, was a long piece of vine. Tabby seemed to measure my head size. She charted a spot with her fingers and went back to her mat, surrounded by various colorful weeds and flowers she had collected
A moment of silence went by as I let the sun sink in more, which gradually heated up the trolly, though very slowly considering the time. Tabby hummed quietly, which was as close to quiet she tends to get, but she seemed happy with momentarily keeping to herself.
-
I was deathly curious about how Naya was doing, so I switched to her. Naya was sat up in her bed, legs crossed under her white hospital gown. Her arm was in a cast, her other arm occupied as she tied up her own sling. She was successful in her attempt, though it did seem a tad too high up on her body at first. Still, that was quickly adjusted. Naya huffed and sounded proud of herself.
The young girl looked to her bandaged hand. She flexed it to test the pain levels. She seemed to be in good shape, though I do remember how mangled her hands were after she had climbed the barbed-wire fence. It seemed Naya had a very high pain tolerance, or she was running off adrenalin.
She shuffled her legs to face the left, seeing a line of empty hospital beds. At the end was a blacked-out window, her reflection visible. She had a few scratches on her face and an erratic bed-head. She vaguely noticed the airlock door and must have mentally summed it up as a tactic to keep her in.
She shuffled her legs the other way and saw only another empty bed by the wall.
Once again Naya shuffled back, she faced forward for a moment before she tilted her head to the hiss of an air-lock door opening. She noticed two scientists left the airlock of an extreme unit room at the end of the left-line of beds. Out of reflex, Naya slammed herself down into the bed to seem asleep.
But they seemed to not even look her way. Once out of sight, Naya sat up, waited a few seconds, and shimmied off the bed. legs hurriedly scuffled to the blacked-out window, she squinted her eyes, utilizing her free hand to dull the glare of the hospital lights. She only saw a blue flash of another room, and a faint darkened view of a control panel.
She stood back and shuffled to the airlock door, her free hand pressed to one of the inner-bars of the wheel. She experimentally pushed it. No luck, it was likely cumbersome, and code locked. Naya looked down. She thought for a moment. Her eyes then scanned to the hospital beds.
The click of heels was heard down the hall and Naya's body sprung up. She was quick to shuffle back to her own bed and slam herself back down as nothing had happened. The tick led into the side room.
The heels halted and the slight beep followed by a click came from the door. Naya was faced away but I. was sure she was taking in every sound. The door was pulled open, and it was a loud door that creaked as it was dragged.
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Elsewhere, an out of place metal door creak struck me out of Naya's vision, and back to my own. I blinked to adjust my eyes back to the bright light. Tabby looked to the door where a Warden stood still at the doorway.
"Tabby." He said, arms behind his back, "I've alerted you three times."
Unemotionally, Tabby put down the flower crown and crossed her arms, "Yup, I know."
"I'll be needing both of you early tomorrow, put an alarm on." He growled, "Don't ask questions and don't complain."
Tabby seemed interested, "Both of us?" She finally faced the Warden, "Sure, yeah, no prob-bob!" There was a bright smile in her tone.
His eyes wandered to the door, then at the doorknob, or lack of doorknob, "What is this?" He stumbled, his finger tapped above the agape doorknob shaped hole in the door, "Where's the doorknob?"
"Dunno, it was like that when I got up here." She shrugged, no concern in her tone "Didn't Naya escape this way?" The Warden took a moment to ponder this, it was false, but it led to suspicion om another culprit.
He, however, nodded, "No... No, she didn't," He turned around, but before he left, a murmur came from him, "Put an alarm on for three-am." He ordered before he shut the door and started his trample downstairs.
"Wait, wait, Wards!" Tabby seemed to remember, she quickly stood and grabbed a flower crown. She trotted over to the stairwell. The Warden was only a few steps down. He turned ever so slightly, an eyebrow raised.
Tabby shuffled over to the Warden, holding out the flower crown, "Ta-da!" She chimed, the flower crown which admittedly was very barren; but so is the desert around us. There were a few Indian blanket flowers, but it mostly consisted of flowery weeds, "I was originally gonna put sand in your desk cus you've been a total b-word recently," She admitted as the Warden hesitantly picked the crown out of Tabby's grasp, "But Alvi and I decided thatif we made a flower crown it might boost your spirits!"
He held the flimsy crown between two fingers, "So this is why you've been ignoring my messages?"
"Mhm!" Tabby rocked on her heels, "Sorry it's kinda lame, but maybe... We should start a flower patch, and make the Virus work on it... With me," She murmured near the end, "We have those abandoned veggie patches we can use!"
The Warden only glared for a few moments before turning around, walking back downstairs, "Set your alarm, Tabitha, and don't charge too late." He cramped the vine-crown into his pocket.
Tabby appeared back in the doorway. she looked to me, giving a thumbs-up. On her screen she started to set up the reminder, humming happily as she did so.
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DATE - JULY 4TH 2015
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"Ugh, why did it have to be so early?!" Tabby groaned, already breaking the promise of 'no complaining' instantly TV head dramatically slung back as she walked behind the Warden.
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I only had the slightest idea of what was going on. I was only ever needed when someone new was to enter the facility. It was a misconception that I needed to make direct eye contact with someone for my disease to work. However I only needed to see their pupils, whether it was through another person didn't matter.
It was a misconception I never planned to correct. I spent enough time in the sleeping cupboard as it was. If the Warden knew I didn't even need to leave my room to use my disease, then he would gladly stuff me in the lower floor and let me out once a month for the sun just to keep me alive.
We reached the final hallway. It was wide and without any wall doors or decor. Only a wide end door that led to the garage and tank storage. It took a moment before the Warden spoke, "Tabitha," He started, "Open the gates."
"Oh em gee wait who's here!" Tabby stopped, her feet shuffled with excitement. Warden gave a hard scowl over his shoulder which only made Tabby giggle, "Ok, ok, I can take a surprise!" She then switched her screen to the map of the first floor. The gates were unlocked with a beep from her, then the outside.
Tabby continued to shimmy in her place, "Do you think it's another Virus, Alvi?!" I shrugged at her question, which didn't stop her from her excited spiel, "I hope it's another girl Virus, the girls we got are totes not girly.." She slouched, "Which is fine I guess... Just kinda disappointing."
Tabby then looked to the Warden and popped over, "Can I get a hint?" She tucked her hands behind her back.
There was a distinct sound; a car rolled into the garage made Tabby squeal and forget about the hint. The Warden at some point had taken an out of character cigarette packet from his cloak, "Close the gates." He ordered with a cigarette between his teeth and a lighter in his hands.
"No prob, boss!" Tabby gave her typical thumbs up before she turned around, she eagerly hummed as she did her task. Just as the beep went off, the Warden gripped the back of Tabby's head. His thumb pressed to a loose plastic slide.
Tabby flailed slightly and tried to grab at the Warden's hand as he slid the plastic away and pressed the flat button behind it. In mere second Tabby ceased to flail as the noise of her booting down began. Her robotic limbs went flat and Tabby fell to the ground in a heap of herself.
I couldn't help but tense and gargle at the sight of Tabby on the floor. Warden must have forgotten I was there, which prompted him to speak, "You are to follow behind." He grumbled after an inhale of his cigarette, "Do not associate."
The doors opened and two suited men walked in, one holding each door as a lady stepped in. She wore a white button-up with speckled pink flowers. Her hair was boyishly short and dyed black. Over her eyes were rosegold glasses that matched dangly hoop earrings.
She was certainly someone who stuck out in this place. She fidgeted slightly as the Warden approached her and she continued to meet him halfway, "Psychiatrist Amy Fritz, correct?"
"Sure is." She forced a slight smile and offered a handshake, "Samuel Vonelché?" The Warden eyed woman's hand for barely a moment before he ignored it. The mention of this lady being a psychiatrist and then Tabby being on the floor suddenly stuck. It was also a surprise that this woman had not noticed the TV person heaped on the floor
"I apologize for the short notice," Warden explained as he removed the cigarette from his mouth and stomped it on the floor. Only inches from where Tabby laid, which seemed to catch the attention of the Psychiatrist, "But we desperately needed assistance with our... Problem."
Fritz eyed Tabby for a moment before she let off an awkward chuckle, eager to seem unphased, "Well, problem children happen to be my specialty." She grinned, which the Warden only met the joke with a hum.
"How much were you filled in on the way here?" He turned around, advising with a hand signal for this stranger to follow, which she and I both did.
"Oh gosh, plenty," She scratched the nape of her neck as her other hand was used to count, "TV girl, Virus, diseases and all that." She shrugged "It's a lot to take in." She furrowed her eyebrows.
"It was fifteen years ago, right?" She then asked, which made the Warden's eyebrow cock slightly, "These... Children are results of the Iraq attacks, right?"
A touchy subject, and one I tensed at, but I suppressed a gargle. Warden held the silence as he eyed the end door where the suited escorts were prior, "Was that told to you?"
"No, no!" She frantically dejected, waving her hand slightly, "I just... It came to me." She sighed slightly.
"Then no," Warden growled, "And it's not any of your business otherwise."
Fritz's face scrunched lightly at this as she felt the awkwardness rock over. She locked her eyes onto me for a long time as her face unshifted into an empty loose look of mortified surprise. Warden noted her expression and proceeded to change the subject, "I'll call for a soldier to come to take you to your room." He explained as he turned around and took a walkie talkie from his jacket, "You'll start at ten, understood?"
She pursed her lips and nodded, "Yes of course!" She straightened her posture, "What should I call you?"
"Warden." He blatantly answered, "You'll call me Warden."
-
As promised, at ten that day, Fritz was ready as she waited outside her small designated room. In her hand were a clipboard and pen. She rightly expected the Warden to meet her or she would be escorted. She watched soldiers who would occasionally trot through, and they would watch her in return.
In the clipboard was all of the information gathered on each Virus; their photos, age, family, and of course their diseases. Her job seemed to be to fill in the blanks of those today. She continued to sigh and squiggle fake lined into the side of the board.
"Amy Fritz the child psychiatrist." Was stated by a distinct smug tone, Fritz. looked over to see the blonde who was stood with keys in one hand, and a metal baseball bat in another. He smiled up with his signature smile as Fritz couldn't help but eye what was obviously a child.
She did, however, note the camo jacket that was worn by the other soldiers, "I didn't know the Warden was recruiting children."
"You shouldn't put it past him," Toby shrugged then eyed the clipboard, he reached out slightly, "Mind if I see who's up first?"
Fritz obliged, she handed over the clipboard over to Toby who gave a chirpful 'thank you' in return. She clearly had not read the whole way through, or she would have seen Toby's extremely blurred photo.
"Joslyn, ey?" Toby hummed, thought for a moment it seemed, "Alrighty, let's go then!" He smiled at Fritz who began to walk just behind Toby. However he stopped and spun around on his heels with a contemplative expression, "You'd be better off starting with Naya." He explained, he then took out a piece of paper from his pocket, "Can I borrow yer pen?"
"Sure thing." She offered the pen to Toby who accepted. He started to copy whatever it was from his paper, onto the other. After a minute or so, Toby handed back the clipboard and pen. There was a crude drawing of a map of the immediate area of the Moth Mound, with two thick scratchy lines used as a pathway, one with crosses through them.
"The ones with the crosses will lead you to Naya, then the rest of the gaggle," He politely explained as he swung the bat to hang over his shoulder, "I'm sure you'll find me on the way out." He then spun back around on his heels and made his way off down the hall.
"Wait!" Fritz called out, quick on her feet to follow the Virus, "Couldn't you walk me there?"
"I probably could!" Toby stuck his hand up to stop Fritz from getting too close. Toby then swung the bat back and crashed it into the vent. Fritz jolted back, dropping the pen. "Oh right, my bad!" Toby snorted before he pointed to the clipboard, "Those maps follow vent lines!" He grinned before he got down to the floor and slipped himself into the vent.
Fritz had objections other than pure shock and fright as Toby disappeared for a moment before Toby's voice piped up from the vent above, "Keep the bat," He flatly said, "The amount of sexual predators that work here is obscene."
With that, he disappeared and Fritz took a few seconds before she looked around the halls, then up at the vents. She inhaled sharply and kneeled to pick up the pen. She then proceeded to follow the map to the hospital ward.
-
Fritz entered the hospital and stopped for a moment; she looked down at the papers, then up at Naya who was sat up in the hospital bed with a smile as she spoke to Charlo the chef who sat on the opposite bed, and he nodded along to whatever she was on about.
It took Fritz a moment before she approached, the click of her shoes made Charlo turn to look over, his expression slightly surprised. Regardless, he stood up, "I'll leave her to you." He simply commented before looking Naya, "I'll take that for you." he offered out his hand.
Naya hummed before she took a packet of chips out from beside her, she poured the rest in her mouth before handing the packet to Charlo. Naya muffled out a 'thank you!' with a dumb messy smile. As Charlo left, he gave a nod to Fritz, still giving her a skeptical gaze as he left. down the hall.
She approached Naya who looked up with surprise. She as well, noticed that Fritz was out of place in the base. Fritz just stared, it took a moment to process for me as to why she would be so out of character stunned to see her when she had the photo.
"Wow," Fritz started, and she only blinked a few times and as she fixed her glasses, "Sorry, it's very strange to see you in person."
"Really?" Naya eyed the clipboard, then Fritz, "Why's that?"
Fritz let off a sad sigh and a smile as she held out her hand, "Naya Yang, I'm Amy Fritz." She then had to switch the hand she offered, so that Naya could reciprocate the handshake. Naya kept examining the psychologist, "May I?" Fritz gestured to the spot on the bed beside Naya.
"Sure..." Naya skeptically answered, looking to Fritz with an upturned head, "You're... A therapist, aren't you?"
Fritz stiffened for a second, surprised at how Naya knew, "Y-yes, though I've been hired as a psychologist," She then stuttered slightly more, "More a psychiatrist but I can be considered both."
Naya smirked slightly, but in a more friendly way compared to when Toby or a soldier would smirk, "You look like my brother's speech therapist." She chortled slightly, tucking her knees in.
Fritz's smile at Naya's grin was very shortlived as she seemed to recall something, "You were close with your little brother?"
"Oh yeah, we're hella close." Naya grinned more, her hand gripped onto her ankle. Naya didn't seem dumb, she absolutely was what Tabby described as a 'jock' but she wasn't a dumb jock. Which made it hard to figure out why Naya was so content with the situation and happy with discussing her family. It was as if she wasn't held captive for the remainder of her life.
Either this was from some sickly strong certainty that she would escape, she had somehow shielded herself from the thought of not seeing them again, or perhaps her lack of emotional distress is due to something Virus related.
For ten minutes in a repetitive fashion; Naya would get distracted while Fritz asks a question, Naya wouldn't listen, Fritz would notice and change the subject which would catch Naya's attention. Every time when Fritz asked a question about family, Naya would perk up and go on a rather cute blurt about her little brother and father.
Then, as soon as Fritz tried to ask about her disease, she'd see something. A flicker of light in the end room's blackened glass, it could be a scientist that walked in or out and even the slightest noise seemed to switch her attention instantly. It seemed boring to me, but Naya had been in that bed beside that room all night.
She didn' let up any new info about her disease, but she did talk about her family lot. Mother and father both immigrated from China four years after Naya was born. She also had a little brother who had a speech impediment
After an hour or so of talking to Naya, she decided to move along. But before she left, Naya called out, "Tell them I said hey, and I'm doin' ok!" Which somehow stuck with Fritz for a second before she agreed and went out.
-
Fritz proceeded down the hallway to the Virus' main containment area, which took a while since she followed the vents. But when she arrived, she was unnerved at the safe door which was opened with the assistance of two soldiers who had stayed to watch guard.
As Fritz walked in, she noted the forced silence. It was common for guards to witness and also repeat. Everyone was secretive so this silence was exceedingly common, especially nowadays with the Virus.
As she stepped in, a shiver went down her spine. Likely from a mix of Joslyn's emotional disease, Skylar's ability was likely used to chill the room with hers, and just overall, the room was cold. The door shut behind her with its shoulder tensing sound.
Once the door shut, Fritz turned the papers and the room was still silent for a long moment. They were all there, they had to be, as quiet as they all were, they had to be there. She inhaled sharply, cleared her throat, and spoke, "I am Amy Fritz, I am a child psychologist." She greeted, attempting to have strength in her voice.
Dead quiet, there were a few shuffles behind the doors, but nothing else. While I wasn't there and could not say for sure, it seemed a certain emotion was being immitted that made Fritz dead silent.
"I just spoke with Naya." She smiled slightly in a purse and that tension in her shoulders seemed to ease, "she's doing well and she says hello." But still, silence. It then came to my attention that the Virus was never informed of Naya's safety or if she was even alive. It had been two days since then and no one knew apart from Toby.
Fritz seemed to get an idea as she stepped back, she tapped her knuckle to the metal door. The door was opened slightly and Fritz hooked her head around to peer at the guards. She pressed a finger to her lips before she mouthed 'close the door.'
They seemed hesitant but agreed. Once the door was shut again, Fritz knelt down and undid her heels before she seated herself. It took a moment but a voice perked up, "A child psych," Skylar's voice seemed unimpressed, "Four days in and they're already desperate."
Dex hummed in reply, "She seemed kinda nice though."
"She seemed scared shitless." Skylar lightly giggled, followed by Dex who lighthearted cackled.
It took a little bit before Joslyn's soft voice rose, "Should we have said something to her?" Joslyn took a moment before she elaborated, "I mean if Naya said hi then isn't that a sign she's. ok?"
"Fuck no she's not ok," Skylar seemed baffled at the suggestion, which by the reaction, made Joslyn flinch, "It's a nice thought but you know damn well for her to be out here, she's either; corrupt, worked here for ages or been paid enough money to keep her yap shut for life... So corrupt in general."
An agreeance of silence went through the air, then Dex spoke, "How much would you have to be paid to be quiet forever?"
In Skylar vision, she blinked a few times, her head swinging lightly against the doorway, "What?"
"Like if you-"
"No I heard you, I just dunno why you're asking."
"I dunno, I'm bored," Then it hit him, "Oh shit, Naya's ok!"
Skylar took another moment before she lightly shook her head and nodded, "Yeah, I don't know if I should be shocked."
"Was that a pun?" Dex had an expectant tone and smugness to him.
Skylar groaned slightly after she realized the correlation, "No, it was not a pun," She furrowed her eyebrows, "Naya plummeted three stories do you think I'd make a joke about that?!"
A silence ensued, which lasted a few seconds before once again, Joslyn spoke, "What's an electrician's favorite ice cream?"
Thinking this was another strange question, Skylar took a while to think it through. "Shock-a-late." Was very meager and muttered end to the joke which made Skylar practically scream 'oh my god.' as she slumped down the door of her cell.
Fritz had bitten the head of her pen to keep a chuckle in. Finally, Dex seemed to get the joke after he'd repeated it under his breath. He then let off a loud cackle.
"Can I pay both of you to keep quiet?" Skylar added on, though it was muffled as her face was in her hands.
The banter continued for a few moments, and Fritz seemed to enjoy just casual banter between teenagers. I continued to scribble the phrases and scenes and made a mental note to show Tabby later. She'd inevitably be upset over not seeing the Virus, and even more upset after being shut off without warning.
Fritz gazed over to a specific door on the left, which seemed odd until I realized. Two eyes were stuck on the psychologist. Two soft reddish-pink eyes that were upside down. Fritz's smile fell quickly. She seemed to think for a moment before she stood up, took her shoes, and tapped on the door.
The room fell silent as they heard Fritz move, and the air evidently grew cold. The door opened and Fritz slipped out of the room. I can only imagine how awkward the air was as she left
After that, Fritz wondered the hall, in hopes she'd find the small soldier that had helped her that morning. But she didn't, and what was stranger, is that I couldn't locate him either. Not until nightfall at least.