I lay on my back, avoiding my sides and my freshly cut upper shoulders. it had all gone wrong, trying to learn and show how a new soul can help. here i was know in the great mothers embrace, lying on hard stone. left with my weaker arms, weaker than the soft ones that were cattle for the crimes of their kind. a wretched pathetic thing that didn't deserve rest...

I roused barely able to get to standing on my lesser limbs, ones that were meant only for fine manipulation. The guard clad in metal armor on top of the natural armor the great mother gave us all, mandibles screeching for me to move. For one as loathsome as me to do something useful for once instead of taking a body that should be for an old soul. Practically thrown out with a rag to cover me between my legs. sunlight blazing bright into my unblinking eyes as I move on the surface of the great mother. A wretch sent back out to suffer for trying to sympathize with the soft ones, with the enemy.

All the lives they've lived and they still couldn't see, couldn't see i didn't care for those even more pathetic creatures. I wanted the work to be done, like keeping any other cattle you can treat them only so poorly before results start being affected. Though i suppose i should have considered that it was more punishment than enslavement... why wouldn't it be?

After waiting for hours one of the scholar assistants came to me, led me to my assigned work. I could write, i was good at writing and word craft, good with numbers so i would spend much of my time doing the most remedial of these services. A light punishment for my mistake. The other half was... disgusting, but best not to dwell on walking behi-

[mys] "moonshadow!" the assistant, another new soul grabbed me by the shoulder and pulled me back from getting run over. the cart driver a soft one, with paler skin. The creatures were pathetic in form. This soft one was immediately stopped by an old soul, pulled off the cart and onto the ground in one motion. the old soul landing one purposeful blow after the other on the soft ones head. in just two hits blood was flowing from the pathetic creatures body, it's soft form being easily broken by the hard shell of it's superior.

It was a wonder why they weren't all killed, these horrid looking things with mouths that remind me of wounds, teeth that make them look more like cattle and a... always forget what it's called, a fleshy piece that rests at the bottom of their mouth. It always looks so, wrong. I moved my head away from looking at the scene directly as the creature wailed and the old soul berated it in the second language. "thanks, i uh... I'm sorry i don't recall your name?"

[mys] The assistant shrugged "it's Mys unseen, your welcome" the refined trilling and clicking of our language greeting me far more comfortably then the moaning, mewling sounds of the soft ones own language. i inclined my head as appreciation and followed him.

The day went on, my empty upper shoulders hurting some as i wrote and wrote, though that was the better part of the day. with the sun out of sight i went about my second task, my second punishment. I deserved it but i didn't look forward to it. the filth these soft ones would make was, well it was one of the foulest smelling things I'd ever come across. here i was shoveling it with weak arms, something that made it only take longer.

The first two hours were unpleasant but calm. then the damn soft ones returned to their pens. their low mewling sounds a torture for the ears as I work- *thud* i heard the wetness in the smack, and felt it slide down my carapace. i looked around but whoever had thrown the piece had slipped out of view before that. after a moment of waiting i returned to the shoveling. in a minute another piece landed on my leg, harmless. I looked again but couldn't see them... a soft one likely. best thing was to finish up as fast as i could and- *thud* a twinge of pain sliced in from my left side. the arm-less socket had been hit, first i was annoyed, then scared. A penitent one like me didn't get healing, the wound could get infected... i could die. i dropped the shovel and brushed the filth off then moved around this walled pit of filth. Searching, seeking out these soft skinned parasites. I heard movement in the corner, i launched into motion. The four limbed wretch cloaked in darkness ran. I was faster, i caught it. I grabbed it by the throat and dug the small digits i had into it. my tougher body able to press into the foolish things skin, draw blood. it's attacks were useless, blows hitting the natural armor the great mother gave... praise to her, to her selflessness for her children. At last it went limp, gurgling out crimson fluid as the whelps eyes, those wrong looking eyes with to much white in them went wide. i dropped it's small body into the pile and waited... silence, peace. no more filth being thrown at me. In a bit over an hour more i finished my work. A walk later i could rest, laying on the dirt in my assigned place.

This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.

The sun's first light wakes me and after getting my penitents ration for water and flesh to consume i return to my writing work, stinking of the soft ones filth. After my lonely penmanship i went back to the filth pit. An old soul standing outside of it, mandibles twitching.

[Pen keeper] "you killed one of mine last night?" hands balling up as he asked. i nodded "and you decided that you what? didn't need to mention it? could waste the body by leaving it in their filth?" i paused, unsure "it's one thing to kill one of those when it's where it shouldn't be penitent, but wasting the body like that is something that does piss me off" his strong arm lashes out and grabs my throat, grip tight "never, ever waste a body of mine like that again or I'll make sure you join the last one in dying on that pile. do you understand body robber?" i nod, frantic and fast. he lets go and I'm feel the air rush back, grateful to live... but should i be?... This night no filth is thrown, I'm left to do my work alone.

Another night another dawn and rations once more. I stink and write and clean filth, alone. this night it rains some, I'm happy. the filthy finally is washed away from body and the next day the other new soul... Mys unseen comes by for just a moment, but it's something.

I shovel filth, my body aching a bit then sleep on the ground once more. I wake with the sun, my side throbs as i get up and i check the empty shoulder... i start breathing in a pant as i realize what's happened. Curses of the sky it's infected. If I had already eaten today i might of lost the meal. That pathetic creature! the damn thing deserved to die! getting me infected when I won't get healing. when my food is limited... Am I a walking corpse? will the great mother favor me with life? can she even notice me while she's sleeping?...

I nearly miss getting my ration from freaking out, it's a rush to get to my work without causing them punish me. I make it work, i marshal my strength and get back on track. I shovel filth again and sleep. I wake with the infection still there. i work at both of my assigned tasks and go back to sleep... such a loss, i was managing these cattle and now i shovel their filthy waste. I wasn't the greatest new soul but i was making a real contribution, not this nearly worthless punishment. now my life was in the balance, my first life... I didn't want to be reborn, not yet. I wake, work, sleep, i wake work sleep, wake work sleep, i wake work, - collapse.

Somehow I'm on the ground again, i can't focus, my left side throbs and stings. The pressure, i can feel it, my body rotting inside now as i hope for the great mothers favor, as others talk above me... was that Mys in shadow? my mind fades. i wake in the night, barely able to focus, to move with any control. I pray, i pray to the great mother, i pray for forgiveness, i pray until i pass out again. Someone gives me water, then again, and again, what day was it? how many days? will the great mother forgive me?

I pray whenever i can, eventually I'm just praying for anything that'll listen. I can feel it, my body is wrong, my blood and all the flesh within... I'm dying, i don't want to die. the world fades... then I'm on, a bed? A bed of cloth, purple and soft. I push off with my arms, my powerful arms pushing me up as the lower ones stretch out and- my arms! my arms are back! w-was it all a dream?... no, is this a dream? a final gift before my end as I'm rejected for- "REBIRTH. yes that is a concern for you now isn't it?"

A purple skinned soft one says sitting on another piece of furniture like mine. orange tendrils for hair and horns sweeping back from the forehead. it smiles, teeth sharp and pointed as a predators.

"mhhh it's been some time since I've seen new souls of your kind. that mother of yours keeps recycling your kind. very naughty of her, but i can keep a secret. that is if we're working together"

he's, he's speaking in my language, not the second language made for the slaves but mine. no soft-skin can do that. perhaps he's not like the other soft skins? "why- who are you?"

[purple man] "mhhh a good question, call me Al. now my potential friend you are in a bit of a tough spot aren't you?"

"and you care because?"

[Al] "oh no need for any great mistrust. you see i like to have friends, though to help you out i have to work around certain restrictions. i can't just come over and help you out personally"

"so, what do you want from me?"

[Al] "well to visit, i can't come to your world just like that. It takes some work to get me over to where you're at... a lot of work actually. so while i do have to make a kind of deal it's really straight forward. i help you out by granting you power, magic. So long as we are friends you'll retain that power. and in return i want you to be my friend, to help me come and visit... well visit without destroying the world entirely that is. oh and just so you know I'm not anything you've encountered before" his orange eyes gleaming.

"that's, all?"

[Al] "oh don't sell it short it'll take some long term effort on your part but i really would like to come and visit your world"

I let out an amused huff "sure, why not. if you can actually save me I'll be your friend for sure. assuming this isn't my mind fooling me"

[Al] "no, it isn't" grabs my hand with a smile.

I see everything dissolve into bright white light, i feel as if I'm baking in an oven. My body is hot, too hot. getting fried from all sides as the air feels hot. it's searing, boiling pain all over for far too long... however long it is, and then it stops. starts cooling... i hear voices, i hear his voice.

"M-Mys?"

[Mys] "y-yes! by the mother your alive?"

I'm so tired, i can't reply. my body aches and i feel empty, dried out and ready to die of thirst or starvation.

[Al]"hold on there friend, stay awake you need to eat and drink"

footsteps come up to me. I focus, force myself to stay awake. i get some water, then a morsel of flesh before i can't keep it up and pass out. over the next few days I'm recovering, drinking water and eating what flesh i can before I'm back to a full ration and able to walk again. The priests see my recovery as favor of the great mother, i don't have to shovel filth anymore. I'd be happy but I'm too worn out for it. Too concerned about who I've just become friends with.