Intermission, Chapter 31 - Brutus and Kyle, On Patrol
As bouncers at the Wild Life nightclub for a living, Brutus and Kyle never had to work during the day. They usually slept most of the daylight away, but the arrangement could also be quite convenient for when they had to run errands.
Brutus wore a button-up orange shirt with a popped collar and tight fitting jeans. With his spiked blond hair, bulging muscles, and considerable height, he was a bit out of place in Japan. He looked like he belonged more on the beaches of California, or maybe the shores of New Jersey.
Kyle stood out far more. As pig-like orc, and a very tall and buff one at that, he turned heads wherever he went. Despite his imposing size, he had a kind face and gentle mannerisms, but that didn’t stop some people from being afraid of him at first glance. The gentle giant was wearing a blue American-style letterman jacket over a grey Armani button up shirt that could barely fit around his barrel of a chest.
Together, they were an imposing sight, and it was debatable whether their dubious fashion sense helped or hurt that image. However, the way they acted definitely diffused it.
“Hello again, Missus Kawahara!” the orc called to an elderly woman who was sweeping the front of her flower shop.
“Oh, Kyle, how wonderful it is to see you! And you have Brutus with you as well. How nice.”
“Greetings, ma’am,” Brutus said with a small bow of his head.
Kyle asked, “How’s business been?”
“Oh, it’s been just wonderful. There’s a nice young woman with a red truck who keeps buying my flowers by the armful. She said she doesn’t even care about the price, since the Exchange Program will reimburse her.” We waved a hand over her head of grey hair. “Now, I don’t know nothin’ about those government programs, or why they’d pay for her flowers, but I’m not one to turn down a sale!”
Kyle smiled and said, “That’s the spirit, ma’am. Well, that’s all great to hear. We’ve got some errands to run before work tonight, but I’m sure I’ll see you again soon!” Kyle and Brutus both waved as they continued down the street.
On the sidewalk up ahead, there were some goods on display in front of a jewelry shop. Kyle saw a little black wing reach up and sneakily pluck a necklace from a rack. The black feathered thief crept along in a crouch until she was under another display, then reached towards the shiniest amulet.
Kyle gently grabbed her wing in a massive fist. “Excuse me, miss. Would you kindly return those necklaces?”
Misaki looked up at the massive orc. Her eyes went wide and she stammered, “I, uh, I wasn’t gonna, uh, take them…”
Kyle rolled his eyes. “Uh huh. And where’s your host at, miss? You can’t be out without one. Even I’ve got my host, see?” With his free hand, he pointed at Brutus, who was busy admiring himself in one of the shop’s mirrors.
“My host? Yamato was right behind me…”
Just then, a young man with messy brown hair ran around the corner. He stopped with his hands on his knees, panting. “Misaki!… I told you… not to fly off! I can’t keep up… on the ground…”
Kyle let go of Misaki’s wing and turned to the newcomer. “Ah, I take it you are this little harpy’s host?”
The boy nodded, still out of breath, and a bit overwhelmed by the sudden sight of a huge orc. “My name’s Yamato, and hers is Misaki.”
“I’m Kyle, and it’s a good thing you’re here, Yamato. This little one was swiping some cheap jewelry just now. You need to keep a better eye on her.”
Yamato sighed. “Misaki… what have we talked about?”
“That my boobs are just for us?”
Yamato flushed red and looked down at the ground, away from Kyle’s eyes. “No! The other thing, about stuff that isn’t yours!”
“Ah! ‘Don’t take it unless you pay for it!’ Oh, I guess I should put these back then.” She casually pulled at her tube top, took several necklaces out, and put them back on the racks, though not in their original spots.
Yamato let out a deep breath and smiled at Misaki. “Good job, Misaki. Now if you really want one necklace, I can buy it for you.”
“Well, I’ll leave you two to it,” Kyle said. Then he called into the shop, “Hey, Brutus, you ready to go? Or do you need to ogle yourself some more?”
“Ha ha, dude. Nah, I’ll be ready in a sec,” Brutus said, stepping up to the group. He turned to Yamato and said, “Hey man, my name’s Brutus, and I’m a host too.” He slipped Yamato a business card that simply read ’Brutus Benihana. Bouncer, Bodyguard.’ and listed a phone number.
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“You got yourself a handful there with Misaki, so you better learn to hold her tight if you want to keep her.” He slapped Yamato across the back. “Good luck, little dude, and give me a call if you ever need some advice about the exchange program. Or girls,” he said with a wink.
The two bouncers left the blushing Yamato and continued down the street. When they passed a ramen shop, it smelled too good to pass up. Brutus lifted the shop’s little curtain and took a seat and Kyle followed after.
Kyle was more observant, and he noticed a familiar black suit and sunglasses at the end of the bar. “Hey! Agent Will. Fancy meeting you here.”
Agent Will looked up from his soup, his sunglasses fogged with steam. “Kyle? And Brutus too of course.” He patted a hand on the seat next to him. “Get over here and I’ll buy your first bowl.”
Kyle laughed as he and Brutus sat down next to Agent Will. “Aha! Learned your lesson after the time you promised to pay for our entire meal?”
Agent Will shook his head in disbelief. “How was I supposed to know you’d each eat nearly a dozen bowls…”
An hour and too many bowls of ramen later, Brutus and Kyle said goodbye to Agent Will and got up to leave.
“Wait a sec, I just remembered something!” Agent Will called after them.
“Oh, what’s up, dude?” Brutus asked.
“A while back, I said I’d set you up on a date.” He stood on his toes to put an arm around Brutus’s shoulders. “Well there’s this total knockout I worked with in the Exchange Program. She’s a bit of a workaholic, running a bunch of different programs for her area, but she’s got legs for miles and a figure that just ain’t fair.”
Brutus nodded. “Alright, but what’s the catch? There’s always one with you, or even two.”
“Well… she is a bit older than you. I guess you could say she’s a ‘Christmas Cake’.” He waved his hand quickly in front of his face. “Actually, never say that… or tell her I said that.” Agent Will shivered and muttered, “She’d kill me.”
Kyle laughed aloud. “You called it, Brutus. Always a catch.”
Brutus glared at Kyle. “Hey now, I ain’t the type to judge women on age alone.” He turned to Agent Will. “Set up that date, dude. I’d love to meet this woman. I always respect a hard worker.”
Agent Will grinned. “You got it. Well, have a good rest of your day, guys.”
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Later, after they’d finished their shopping and other minor errands, they had one last stop: the bakery.
“MmMmm, that smells good,” Kyle said, sniffing the air.
“What does?” Brutus asked.
“The bichon au citron of course! I can smell the caramelized sugar and lemon creme already!”
Brutus shook his head. “You and your crazy nose. We’re still like three blocks away, man.”
“Ha, three blocks is nothing to my nose. Orc sense of smell has a range of at least a kilometer,” Kyle boasted.
“Yeah, okay, dude. Let’s just get your pastries and get home. We got work tonight, after all.”
The shop door opened with a jingle of a bell. The man behind the counter turned and said, “Welcome to the—” He cut off when he saw the massive silhouette filling the doorframe. Flashbacks of a huge brute of a man he once knew ran through his head.
Kyle stepped the rest of the way into the store, with Brutus shortly behind. When the shopkeeper saw who it was, he relaxed and said, “Welcome to the Muse’s Grace pastry shop. I am the head patissier, Ichinose.”
Kyle sprinted to the main pastry case, practically shaking the building with his footsteps. He pressed his hands and snout up against the glass and peered inside. “Oh man, oh man, oh man! These look amazing! The mellow shades and high contrast of chocolate and cream! The delicate touch of the accent ingredients. It’s all so elegant!”
The shopkeeper held a hand to his chest and smiled proudly. “Ah, you have an excellent eye for the art of the pastry.”
“Oh, thanks. I consider myself a bit of an enthusiast, and I do some baking, but I’m nowhere near your level. I particularly like your subtle use of color.”
“Color?” Brutus called from across the room. “If you want color, check out this case. These cupcakes are crazy colorful.”
As Kyle joined him to look at the cupcakes, the patissier said, “Ahh, those were made by the new girl. She and I have, uh, differing beliefs about the use of hue.”
A voice came from the back room, “Hey, watchu saying about my colors?” The door to the back room swung open and a petite girl pushed her way through, wearing the same white uniform as Ichinose. She was holding a piping tube of frosting in each hand, and a third floated over her shoulder, held in the spiral tip of a scaly tail.
All three of her tubes of frosting were different bright colors, but they couldn’t compare to her prismatic hair and skin. She had a veritable rainbow across her hair and over all of her exposed skin and scales. Her hair was gelled up into spikes about three inches long, she had a narrow face with soft features, and her eyes were currently a deep purple.
She said, “Hello. I just started working here, but I’m glad my work is getting some attention.”
Brutus smiled at her. “How could it not? These are great! I love all the colors of the frosting.”
Kyle stared openly at the woman, enamored. He’d never seen anything like her. Chameaonides were certainly one of the rarest liminal races, but it wasn’t just her race that had caught his eye. He whispered, “I love all the colors of her skin…”
His ‘whisper’ was pretty loud in the small shop, and everyone heard it. The lizard-like woman turned entirely red from head to tail, and as soon as Kyle realized what he’d said aloud, he blushed too. “Sorry, ma’am.”
“Um, uh, “ she stammered. “It’s no problem, but uh, don’t call me ma’am. Makes me feel old.” She leaned forward on the glass counter, and smiled at Kyle. “Just call me May.”
After Kyle and May stared at each other for a few more awkward seconds, Brutus broke the silence. “Hey, wait a minute, miss. I think I recognize you. Have you ever been to the Wild Life nightclub?”
She turned a warm orange color and replied, “Oh, yes. I love it. I’d go there to dance every night if I could.”
Kyle grinned like a fool and bragged, “Well, Brutus and I work there as bouncers.” He leaned forward and added, “Oh, my name is Kyle, by the way.”
Brutus elbowed him and said, “Hey dude, buy some pastries already. We gotta go if we’re gonna make it to work on time.”
“Oh, yeah, sorry.” He picked out over a dozen pastries, and May rung up the sale. After he paid, Kyle fidgeted and fretted, then said, “Are you going to be at the Wild Life tonight? I’d like to see you again.”
May smiled and her face turned a bright pink. “Uh, I think I can make that happen.”