“For nothing is fixed,

forever, forever, forever,

it is not fixed;

the earth is always shifting,

the light is always changing,

the sea does not cease to grind down rock.

Generations do not cease to be born,

and we are responsible to them

because we are the only witnesses they have.

The sea rises, the light fails,

lovers cling to each other,

and children cling to us.

The moment we cease to hold each other,

the moment we break faith with one another,

the sea engulfs us and the light goes out.“

~ James Baldwin

That poem was recited at my wife’s funeral. I can’t help but shed a tear every time I read it. For I long to see her again yet I know I will never be able to. This beast, this wretch, is the closest that I shall get to seeing my beloved again. It understands my desire for companionship. My longing for something that I, in my frail state, can never obtain. I have decided to name the wretch Beth, after my dearly departed.

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The beast seems to have taken an interest in the name that I have given it. Its joy is the sole reason for my existence as of now. The creature behaves around me in the manor that dog would once its owner comes home after several hours. Yet it is still an animal, and as such, I have kept my guard up. Despite that, the creature doesn’t have any innate desire, that I’m aware of, to harm me.

The beast is wholly incapable of speech as I have found out. It seems to be more focused on nonverbal communication. Something that I was all too familiar with once my wife had became bedridden. Nonetheless, I remain steadfast in my faith that I will eventually find a way out of here. Perhaps this wretch could help me with that somehow.

For now, all I can do is sit and think, think about what I’ve done. Soon, tomorrow will come and maybe then I’ll have an answer. Yet that’s for future me to figure out, present me just has to keep himself sane long enough for that to happen.