Guilt was something that sat heavy in the bottom of Kit's stomach. When they arrived at Kit's apartment, he was swift to bring her upstairs before anyone noticed the smell of blood wafting off of her. The woman needed a shower, and badly. Being covered in blood wasn't the smartest thing to do while being in an apartment complex full of supernatural creatures. So as soon as he got to his apartment, he led Vivian back towards his bedroom and through it to his bathroom. The woman surprisingly gave no protest as he dragged her towards his bedroom, but she also didn't seem completely there. Which made sense. She did just watch another one of her friends get attacked by a rabid.

He had gotten her clean towels, turned the shower on for her and was about to leave the bathroom when something tugged at his shirt. When he looked back, he saw it was Vivian that grabbed him, the fabric turning red in her fingers. "D-Don't... don't go... please..."

Confusion was the first thing that rattled through him at the woman's words. "I am just going to be in the living room, Vivian."

She then looked up to him, pleading with her eyes. "Please. I-I don't..."

That was all it took for Kit to understand. "I can sit by the door." He offered, and something flashed across Vivian's face. "With my back turned, of course."

"That would work." Vivian replied, her voice small and shy.

And so Kit found himself sitting on the bathroom floor by the door, staring at it while Vivian showered behind him. He could hear the water running off her body and hitting the tub, no doubt pink in color as it washed away the blood on her. Kit could tell she was using his body wash, as the scent of pine and mint filled the room and washed the scent of blood away.

When Vivian was done, Kit stood outside of the door and let Vivian dry herself off. "Let me grab you some clothes." He said, and quickly rifled around his room until he found a clean t-shirt and sweatpants she could wear. Handing it to her through the crack of the door, Kit went to sit on the bed and waited for the woman to exit his bathroom.

When she did, she was dressed in the clothes he gave her, wet hair against her back causing the shirt to dampen. Her face was clear of the blood that was smudged there, as was her arms were also clean. Even though she looked tired and worn, he couldn't help but notice how beautiful she was. The thought made something stir deep in his stomach.

"Where do I put the towels?" Vivian asked, her voice shy.

"I will take them." He said, moving off the bed and grabbing the towels from her hands. Kit wanted to comment on how clean she looked now, but figured he shouldn't say anything that might trigger the memory. So he just moved past her and hung the towel up over the shower rod.

"Kit?" Vivians voice asked, the man turning towards her. She stood in the doorway of the bathroom, steam collecting above her head. "I..." She began, but tears formed in her eyes, which made Kit move to her immediately.

"Vivian." He whispered out as he stood in front of, beginning to reach out but then stopping. He thought it would be better if he didn't touch her. Kit wasn't sure how she would respond to it right now. "What is it? Tell me."

The woman brought both hands up to her face as she let out a sob. "I-I can't stop seeing it." Vivian cried into her hands, the vampire's heart lurching from his chest.

Kit wanted to comfort her, wanted to reach out and take her in his arms. But he remembered the last time he hugged her and how absolutely still she was. He didn't want to cause her any more discomfort. Yet he still had to do something. So he reached a hand out and set it on her arm, fingers soft.

What happened next was completely unexpected, but the woman moved her hands from her face and latched onto Kit's shirt, burying her face in his chest. He stood frozen for a moment, the woman letting out a heart wrenching sob. Without thinking about it, the vampire wrapped his arms around her.

"I am so sorry, Vivian." The man whispered into her hair, unsure of what else to say. What did one say in a moment like this? His heart hurt for her, for the pain that she was going through. She had seen something terrifying, and for it to happen to one of her closest friends, it had to be absolutely horrible. There was nothing he could say that would make this any better.

They stood there like that for a while, Vivian crying into Kit's chest and the vampire gently soothing her. It was only once Vivian had calmed down a little that he led her over to the bed and sat them down. "You should sleep." He said in a quiet voice, helping the girl down to the pillows.

"I-I can't." Vivian said, but didn't fight against him as he tucked her in. "I-I'll just keep seeing it."

"You will not." Kit replied, his voice still soft. He brushed some hair off of Vivians face that was caught by her tears, tucking them behind her ear. The look of panic was clear on the woman's face, and it made his stomach drop. "I promise you."

"How can you be so sure?" She asked, staring up at him with wet eyes.

"I will put you to sleep, and it will be a dreamless sleep."

"You can do that?"

"Yes." Kit nodded, his knuckles brushing against her cheek. He could hear breath hitched the slightest bit.

Vivian just looked at him for a moment before nodding and letting her eyes close. Kit moved his hand to place it atop her forehead and took in a breath.

"Stay with me." Vivian said, eyes still closed. Kits breath halted, looking down to the woman on the bed. "Please."

"Of course." Kit replied, his thumb running over the skin it sat upon. "Now, sleep." He let the aether flow into his words, manipulating the aether within Vivian and causing her breath to deepen.

Even though she was asleep, the man didn't remove his hand. Rather, he let it sit there for a moment, absorbing the warmth that radiated from the woman. Stay with me. Her words echoed in his head as he looked down at her. He couldn't pull himself away, no matter how much he told his body to move. He just couldn't.

Kit felt his heart lurch. What was going on with him? He knew he should move away, that he should just let the poor woman rest after everything that's happened, but he just couldn't. There was something sitting heavy in his stomach, something pulling tight at his heart, but he couldn't name it. He wouldn't.

Slowly, as if not to disrupt her, the man took his hand away and stood from the bed.

Stay with me.

The man's chest stung. This was all his fault. Kit had left for a few moments to take care of a rabid in a different part of town, and that's when they were attacked. When Kit wasn't there to protect her. There was some relief in the fact that she was safe, that she wasn't harmed during the attack, but it was quickly washed over by guilt. Heavy guilt that drowned out any other emotion. This was all his fault. He arrived too late to save her friend, too late to keep Vivian from seeing her friend attacked by a rabid.

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The man dropped to the ground by the door, making sure he made no sound on the way down. Should he offer to take away those memories? Would it even work on her? He remembered when she said that she was having nightmares about the night Penny was killed, an obvious crack in the spell that Kit used. Would she just be plagued by the same nightmares? Would she just see her friend getting mauled over and over? The guilt deepened.

Dropping his head, Kit let out a breath. He wondered if Sebastian had made it back to Niccolo's on time. He really hoped he had.

About an hour later, when Kit was sure that Vivian was asleep, he crept out of the room and headed upstairs to speak with Viktor. The vampire found the witch outside on their balcony, watching the town below.

"What's on your mind?" Viktor asked, already knowing there had to be a reason that Kit would come unannounced.

"Vivian and her friend were attacked by a rabid." He said simply, looking away from the witch and towards the view outside. "Vivian survived, but her friend..."

"They didn't make it?"

Kit shook his head. "I had Sebastian bring him to Niccolo to see if anything can be done."

The witch let out a breath. "Well I am sure that Niccolo will be able to take care of it. How is Vivian fairing? Was she injured?"

"No." Kit said, looking up to the witch. "But she... she is not doing well, and I do not know how to console her."

Viktor hummed softly, turning back towards the penthouse, Kit following. "Well I'm glad you were there for her. I would be thoroughly disappointed if Vivian died."

Kit's heart clenched, breath stuck in his throat. He couldn't even think about that possibility. "I was not able to protect her friend." The vampire admitted, the guilt weighing heavy in his stomach. "He was harmed because of me."

"Don't go blaming this on yourself, Kit." Viktor said, moving to stand in front of the vampire. "This was not your fault, you did what you could."

Kit eyed the witch. "But it wasn't enough."

"Have you asked Vivian that?" Viktor bit out, almost as if he was offended. "Have you even taken her feelings into consideration?"

Her feelings? "Why would it matter-?"

"Are you saying Vivian's feelings don't matter?" Viktor accused.

"No!" Kit was quick to say. "No, of course not. But I just... I cannot help but feel this was my fault Viktor, nothing that Vivian says will change that."

"Must you always paint yourself as the monster?" Viktors voice was soft, but it cut like a knife into Kit. Because he was. Kit was a monster. "Nevermind that. As long as Vivian is okay, that is what matters. I'm sure Niccolo will take care of the friend."

Kit watched as Viktor walked back into the living room, leaving Kit standing by the door. He wanted to agree with Viktor, that all that mattered was that Vivian was okay. But she wasn't. She would have to live the rest of her life with the memory of seeing her friend attacked by a rabid. And that sent guilt rolling through him all over again.

✩

Vivian's consciousness came to her slowly at first, the feeling of the mattress and sheets on top of her telling her she was safe in her bed. Except the sheets felt wrong, they were too smooth, too silky. Opening her eyes, she realized that she wasn't in her bed at all, let alone her bedroom. Her consciousness slammed into her then, bolting upright in the bed. Where was she? Whose bedroom was she inside of? Looking around the room, there wasn't much to take in, and it was much too dark to see anything. Something by the door caught her eyes, and Vivian allowed her eyes to focus on the shape resting against the door. It was Kit, she realized, the vampire's back pressed to the wood, his head falling forward, hair creating curtains around his face. Was he asleep?

Vivian wracked her brain for what she could possibly be doing in his bedroom, and then it all came back to her. The market, Elias, the rabid attack. Elias' blood covering her hands, the man gasping for air below her. Her heartbeat raced beneath her skin as panic flushed through her system. Where was Elias? Was he safe?

"Vivian." Kit's voice sounded from the ground, groggy and deep. He was at the side of the bed in no time, sitting on the mattress beside her. "Hey, hey, what is it?"

"Elias." She breathed out, reaching for Kit. The vampire gave her both his hands, and she took them. His grasp was cold but firm. "He- I- Where is he?"

"He should be at Niccolo's by now." Kit answered, his thumb moving over her hands. "Niccolo will turn him, remember?"

Turn him. Elias, a vampire. Oh god, oh no, no, no. What had Vivian done? With the other option being Elias dying, it seemed easy, of course she would rather him be a vampire then be dead. But now he was going to actually be a vampire, just like Kit, the realization hitting her hard. Would he hate her? It was her decision after all.

"What do I do?" Vivian asked, tears forming in her eyes. "He's- he's going to be a vampire Kit! W-What do I do?"

"He is going to be fine." Kit reassured her, taking one of his hands from hers and brushed hair behind her ear. Her skin was so soft underneath his touch, it made his chest flutter."There is nothing for you to do."

"This is my fault. T-This is all my fault!" Vivian cried out, tears spilling from her eyes and streaking down her cheeks.

"No." Kit said harshly, almost surprising Vivian with the seriousness of it. "No, Vivian, this was not your fault. Do not blame yourself. This was my fault."

Vivian looked up to Kit, his face blurred by her tears. "H-How could it be your fault?"

"I should have been there. The rabid never should have gotten anywhere near you." Kit said, the guilt clear on his face.

Despite Vivian, she found herself shaking her head. "No, no this was my fault."

"Why do you insist on taking the blame?"

"Because it is my fault!" She yelled, but it was desperate sounding and weak. "He was walking me back home because I had a headache. If it wasn't for me, he would never have left the market, we wouldn't have heard that scream!"

Kit looked at her, the same desperation in his eyes. "Please, Vivian. This was not your fault."

Vivian wanted to argue, to yell at him and force him to understand that yes, yes it was her fault. This was all her fault. But her voice wouldn't come out, tears spilling from her eyes and wretched sobs working their way out her mouth. Kit pulled her into his chest, and she fell easily, grabbing onto him.

She cried into him for she wasn't sure how long, and when she was done she felt numb. Vivian pushed herself off of the man's chest, straightening herself up a little bit. Still, she kept her hands on his chest, the fabric wrinkled between her fingers.

"Do you want any water?" Kit asked softly, and she shook her head in response. She honestly just wanted to go back to sleep, to wake up and this all to have been some horrible nightmare. But she knew that wouldn't happen.

"I don't know what to do, Kit." She finally said, exhausted and sad.

Again, the vampire reached his hands out, taking her face in them. His palms were cool against her cheek, making her suck in a tiny breath. "Vivian, listen to me. There is nothing for you to do. There is nothing for you to feel guilty for. This was not your fault." It was mine, she could almost hear him say, but he didn't. He left it at that, looking at her so deeply she could swear he saw her soul.

Vivian moved her hands from his chest to the ones on her face, whispering against his skin. "Will I ever see him again?"

Kit hesitated before answering, almost as if thinking. "I will make sure of it."

Vivian nodded, letting out a deep breath. But then a realization hit her and she sank back down into her depression. "Oh gods, what am I going to tell Ophelia?"

The vampire was quiet with that question, looking at her with deep concern. "You cannot tell her the truth."

"Well duh!" Vivian snapped back, but it was dull and weak. "I can't just tell her a vampire attacked us and Elias is now going to become one!"

Kit's thumbs moved across her cheeks, her face still being held by him. "No, you cannot." He released a breath and withdrew his hands, something Vivian very much did not like. His hands were a comfort on her face, soft and cold against the heat of her panic. "We will think of something, I promise."

"Can I... can I just stay here? For a couple of days? I'm not..." She looked away from Kit, embarrassment quickly overcoming her senses. "I'm not ready to go home yet."

"Whatever you want, Vivian." Kit answered easily, no hint of tease in his voice. That caused her to look back at him, to see the sincerity in his eyes. "Whatever you need."

Vivian reached out for Kit, feeling something deep and heavy in her chest as he opened himself for her. She collapsed against his chest, arms weaving behind his back and grabbing the fabric from his shirt. "Thank you, Kit."

And there was so much for her to thank him for. For saving her, for potentially saving Elias, for taking care of her and being gentle, for always being there for her when she needed him. It made her chest flutter when he wrapped his own arms around her, pulling her close to him. Vivian would be sure to thank him better one day, when this was all over and she could return to a normal life. Whatever that meant for her now.