Constable Ramsey made it to Trafalgar Square just as Monty caught up with him. They both felt the effect of the safe zone as they crossed into it. The air was a little calmer, and suddenly there was no mist.

They saw the two central fountains, spraying water high into the air. Several pigeons were washing in the lower pools, flapping wings and dipping beaks into the cold water. There were humans two, looking much less comfortable. From upper class couples to street urchins and bird seed sellers, all of them looking nervous and confused about what was going on outside this safe zone.

“There are no monsters here, sir, we should be quite safe,” Ramsey gasped.

Monty looked at the four dark lions sitting at the base of Nelson’s Column. They stared out from the four corners, perhaps it was their protective gaze that kept the monsters at bay?

“Now if you don’t mind my impoliteness.” Constable Ramsey slumped down and took off his helmet. His hair was plastered to his head, his face red, his trouser leg was torn and blood was seeping through. Only his moustache was still in good repair. He had exerted himself greatly in the course of duty.

Monty felt a pang of patriotism, here was a protector of the realm, injured in the course of his duty. The least Monty could do was offer him some succour.

“Well done, old chap. That was a bonza effort!” Monty said.

“My thanks, sir. You made a marvellous effort too.” Constable Ramsey shifted and winced in pain.

“I should see if there is a doctor or nurse amongst this crowd. Hold steady, Constable, the cavalry will be on its way.”

Monty looked at the crowd more closely. There were ladies and gentlemen, most of them looking terrified and confused. Several urchins were hanging about, newspaper or bird-seed sellers by the looks of them. Nobody that he could make out as a doctor. Best to make enquiries. He approached the scattered groups, asking for a doctor, but nobody answered the description. Some of them even drew away from him in nervous tension.

He felt a tug on his sleeve.

“You looking for some help, guv?” The scruffy face of a newspaper boy looked up at him. His face was cheery and innocent despite the grime that covered it. “’Ere’s a newspaper.” He pushed a fresh feeling newspaper into Monty’s hand. Monty took it without looking.

“Yes, the Constable has been injured in the course of duty, and we seem to be trapped here amongst dangerous animals. Do you know if we have any medical staff hanging about?”

“Nah, just a lot of gents and ladies hiding away. Give ‘im a drink from the fountains though, that’ll pep him up.”

Monty looked at the two fountains, spraying away. Pigeons were still flapping and washing themselves in the wide pools at their base. “I’m not sure that’s safe drinking water, my little chap.”

“Nah, it’s gone magical, guv. I drunk some and it healed me finger.” The young boy held up his hand. It was covered in newspaper ink, but one of his fingers was clean and pink. “It was bit off by a dog when I was seven, and the water grew it back!”

“Well, usually magical waters are in windswept moors or caves of mystic origin. But I have just been attacked by a bus, so who knows…”

“Look at the birds, guv!”

Monty sidled over to the fountain and watched one of the pigeons bathing. As it splashed and dipped its beak into the water, one of its crippled talons straightened and healed up.

“By Jove. There is most certainly a spell all over London, what a marvellous thing! You are most perspicacious.” He patted the young boy on the shoulder.

The young boy bristled at the unfamiliar word. “If I’m Percy spacious then you’re a long streak of pi- “

“Perspicacious means observant. You notice something quite important.” Monty cut in.

“Oh yeah. Fanks. My name’s Colin.”

“I’m Monty. But I have a patient to attend to.” He jogged over to Constable Ramsey. “Come here, Constable, we’ll have you right as rain!” He levered up the officer and helped him to the fountain side. “Have a gulp of this stuff!”

Despite Ramsey’s initial protestations once he took a sip of the water, he felt its healing properties. He took a deeper gulp, and the long gash on his leg faded away.

You could be reading stolen content. Head to the original site for the genuine story.

“Hurrah! What a marvel! Look here, look here!” Monty waved his newspaper in the air at the suspicious and frightened crowd around the square. It was not effective at reassuring them, but Monty was in such high spirits that he didn’t notice too much. “We’ve been blessed! Yes, I knew there was magic in this old city to be found. We’re in the middle of a good old adventure, aren’t we?” He gave Ramsey a good hearty slap on the back.

“Quite, sir. Now I must get back to escorting others here. Who knows what other creatures are out there terrifying the public?” Constable Ramsey straightened himself and replaced his helmet securely on his head. Despite his torn trouser leg, he looked the perfect police-officer. In fact, the battle-damage to his uniform only made him appear even more heroic and stoic. Except at the top of the tear, where it revealed his bright red underpants. Still, that was not something polite company would mention, and Monty most certainly considered himself polite company.

“‘Is knickers are red!” Colin laughed. Colin considered himself good company, if not polite.

“Let’s not focus on that. The Constable has his duty to do. You know, I should help you out Constable Ramsey. I’m a dab hand with my sword, and it’s better to be out there doing something rather than lolling around here like this lot.” He nodded to the upper- and middle-class pedestrians waiting in the square.

“Oh, I can’t ask a member of the public to assist me in my duties, though your help was most welcome, sir.”

“Call me Monty. We’ve been bonded in the forge of battle!”

“Cor, that sounds painful,” Colin chipped in.

“It is, young lad, it is,” Monty said.

“It was very painful,” Ramsey agreed. He tried to adjust his trousers to restore some of his dignity but the torn leg flapped about like loose wallpaper.

“I’ll come wiv ya!”

“No, I can’t take a child into battle. No offence, I admire your gumption.”

“I don’t ‘ave gumption any more. When I stuck me ‘and in the fountain it all fell off. And I’ve delivered all me papers ‘ere, I can’t level up any more.” He tried to lever a newspaper into Constable Ramsey’s hand, who politely pushed it away.

“Levels! Numbers!” Monty shuddered at these terrible words. “We are on the eve of some magnificent transformation of London into a heroic fantasy, must we cut everything into little pieces, transcribing it into little notebooks so we can preach to class-rooms full of little children who don’t know…” He trailed off when he realised, he was arguing with somebody who wasn’t there. He cleared his throat. “Excuse me- good god! Julie! My girlfriend is in Chelsea, I’ve got to save her!”

“Chelsea’s really nice, though,” Colin said. He scratched his head under his cap.

“Of course, it is but if omnibuses are stalking the streets, who knows what kind of monstrosities are galloping around Chelsea? I’ve got to make my way there.”

“That is going to be a challenge, sir. With all these beasties and mist about, that could take an entire day.”

“I’m willing to fight anything!”

“I’ll fight wiv ya!”

“Under the circumstances, I have reconsidered your offer, Colin. England hath need of thee, as Wordsworth would say. Altar, sword, and pen altogether. Well sword, truncheon, and newspaper. Three is a magic number after all.”

“We’re gonna go running over to Chelsea?”

“Yes, but perhaps there is a close stop first. The Quill Club. It’s just over in Soho. All my chums should be there, we can recruit a lot of them to help me get West into Chelsea. I tell you no matter what travails we face, that lot of poets and dreamers and heroes will help us through. Are you two chaps up for an epic tale of love and battle?”

“I do have my duty to save the public, sir.”

“Look at it this way old bean. I’m going to make my way there anyways, Colin here is itching to get out of Trafalgar Square anyways, and if you come with us, you’ll have the opportunity to inform anyone we find of the safety here. It’s a win-win… win. All three of us win.”

Ramsey could see the determined look in Monty’s eyes. He had seen it at 3am in the eyes of drunks who were greatly confident that they could jump from the head of one lion to the other. None of them ever made it, but no amount of kind persuasion or stout truncheoning ever stopped them from trying.

“Yes, I can see you are set on this idea then, sir. I’ll come with you a little way then. There will be people in Leicester square for sure, I can help them.”

“Let me compose something for the occasion.”

The law, the sword, the word

Aligned in purpose

Our loins are gird,

Our courage in surplus.”

We three now aligned,

Venture into misty streets

And gainst Fate’s designs

Muster our feats.

Constable Ramsey wiped a small tear from his eye. “Nobody ever made a poem for me before.”

Colin peered at Monty’s feet, trying to see where he put the mustard.

“Onwards!” Monty marched up the stairs towards the National Gallery, like a returning General scaling the stairs of the senate in victory. But it was only the start of the battle.

They felt the edge of the safe zone as soon as they approached. There was a wall of mist there, and a charge in the air. The hair on their neck prickled at the feel of danger, but they stepped out together in one motion.

Now the wind was a little harsher, they were engulfed in the mist, and they heard distant shouts and roars from whatever was roaming the streets. The immense façade of the National Gallery looked like an ancient temple, waiting for worshipers.

“We’ll just pop through the alley that goes by the National Gallery, that will pretty much take us to Leicester Square. Perhaps that is a safe zone too. If not then we’ll just go around. We need to get across Shaftsbury Avenue, go past the theatres there and then a little hop across Soho will take us to Berwick Street. I’m sure I can take care of any little beasties with my sword and the capable aid of your truncheon Constable Ramsey. Colin stay out of danger, but keep an eye out for more magical effects like the fountains. Anything big and dangerous we’ll run from, and try to meet up at Berwick Street. Got that?” Monty said in low tone.

“Yes, sir. It’s a sturdy plan.”

“Yeah, sounds good, guv.”

“After me, gentlemen.” Monty took them towards the alley, his sword held out ahead of him in a ready stance.

“I’m a kid. An’ he’s a copper.” Colin skipped a little to keep up with Monty.

“On this strange day we are all gentleman,” Monty said generously.

“Speak for yerself,” Colin sniffed.