You’re walking in the streets, that’s when you see the knife
A terrorist, a murderer, or possibly a butcher
The knife-holder comes near you and your instinct is to flight
But then they lunge and stab your chest right in the center
What did I do? You think, you don’t deserve the hate
But then again maybe this death was just your planned fate
In your lungs you feel weight, in your stomach you ache
You sink into this painfully horribly dizzy state
Pain in your chest, ribs, lungs, and your world fades to black
Your family is ahead of you and your friends are in the back
You scream and roar but no one seems to care
Your heart rate is quickly slowing down then going flat
Life is a racetrack, you realize
You run, you stumble, and then you get a fallback
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All to leads up to this moment, where everything gets shred into scraps
You scrape your knees on the running dirt track
pay back
flashbacks
Backtrack
What’s difference? You think, your life is a sack of crap!
Pointlessness, purposeless, you wrapped your entire identity around your political and scientific beliefs
You don’t even want to live, you just want some relief
Your life is a fur ball of angst and dismay
You’re at your last moments and all you can think about is how you always wanted to rust away
You have no hope, you have nowhere to hold on to
And yet you dislike this
You don’t want this
Because you want to be heroic, fearless, courageous
And yet you’re here, bleeding and lifeless on the ground, praying a death wish
You want to be noticed, want to be remembered, that person who was a genius who left their own traces
You want famous last words
You want to show the world your hurt
But now you’re here, you rat, unable to think of anything and just swearing in your head
Over and over, those curses
All those thoughts, discoveries, contributions, gone to nothing!
This wasn’t planned, no, it was supposed to be your death, your killing, your sudden spur of the moment
You still had plans, you wanted to be a lawyer, a scientist, a politician
And this wasn’t supposed to happen!
But then again you would’ve never made it anyway
You’re a bag of worthlessness you’ve got nothing to motivate
It was always just a dream and you knew it was going to blow away
So don’t even try to stay
Just let go
Shut your eyes closed
Stop trying to live
You’re not going to like it
So just stop
Give up
You thought it was all going to be all okay?
How pathetic
You were always going to fade
This was as always how you were meant to go
By a random murderous death
So breathe your last breath
And hope you don’t wake up again the next day