You haven’t seen him work

The Space-Station was eternally frozen above the center of the Allworld’s night side. Luke floated towards it and watched the Allclub shimmer at the center of a hemisphere made of every nighttime setting and scenario anyone could ever imagine, and thought of something Rory had said.

“They made it to trap the new souls. Like a magnet. They get born, dreaming about something, and it’s already right here on the ball, so that’s where they end up. I bet we used to all start out in the black, in our own realms. Then when we met each other on the paths, we met each other with power. They couldn’t have that.”

Looking at it now, he doubted it was that simple, but realized that, ultimately, he didn’t care. If this was a well-crafted hell or an accidental heaven, he still had to find his way in it, and it would never again include her.

He floated down towards the Space-Station and was immediately reminded of the old pipes screensaver. Solar panels and module tubes and even some geodomes meshed together into something that had roughly the same outline as a snowflake no matter how it turned.

The eponymous restaurant bar was perched at the top of the rotational axis. It looked like every rotating restaurant on earth blended together and hit with a dash of early 00s Sci-Fi channel. Luke gave his name and was escorted past the pulsing crowds to a dim upper level, where most of the tables sat in dusty shadow and the few customers were shrouded in a cloud of haze, like a digital blur effect that flowed out of the hanging table lights.

They gave him a seat at the rim and he watched the crafts fly in and drank a coffee that somehow burst with the real pop of caffeine, trying to forget about her.

About an hour or so later, as he sat there beating back bliss cravings with reminders of Car-Crash’s loyalty, Philip sat down across from him.

The extractor was very careful. Luke knew Dr. X would go back over it at the end, changing names and identifying features and warping info into unrecognizable vagaries, but the best way to protect intel was to never collect it. Philip’s face was shrouded in blur. His real name never even came to Luke’s mind while he was in the seat. It felt like Luke was casting a play based roughly on the meeting, and the guy at the table was just some actor. Only the dialogue was essentially unchanged.

“So you’re looking to ditch Ace Tactical and work some real jobs. I got a spot on my squad, and from what I’ve seen you could fit right in. But first I need three things. One, kick the fucking Bliss habit, and I mean really kick it, because I’m gonna have you look a friend of mine in the eyes and tell him you kicked it, and if you’re lying he’ll know it. Two, get your mind right with being on the bottom, because you might be hot shit with A.T., but on my team you’re gonna start out eating shit and liking it. Three, the next time we meet will be in the Hardworlds, and if you drop in through some fucking A.T. box or anything like that, you won’t see me then or ever again. Got it?

Luke had been waiting for a pause to say something like “Oh, who says I want to join your team? What’s so great about it? Sell me on it.”, but from the guy’s tone and posture and everything else, he knew that would probably only get him laughed at.

And besides, the last part had sent his mind working in overdrive.

“How do I get in without a box? You mean with one of those, uh, segments?”

“You mean fragments, and no. Those are for dropping into a Hardworld without waking up in your jammies. That’s beyond you and probably will be for years. I mean get in the Hardworlds on your own.”

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Lightbulbs went off. Strange phrases and conversations remembered from the Freed and overheard all over the Other rolled over and showed themselves anew.

“I can get in the Hardworlds on my own? How?”

Philip had laughed, smiled, and got comfortable with his cigar and container of sour Altoids, having seen in Luke’s reaction a genuine curiosity and desire he must have been looking for.

“You just wish it real hard. Imagine a door. Or a pill, or something that will wake you up, so to speak. Just convince yourself whatever it is will wake you up in the Hardworlds, and there you go. I guess our glass-faced friend forgot to mention it to you.”

“And that will work?” Luke couldn’t believe it wasn’t some kind of prank. Everything he had read and heard told him the Hardworlds had been inaccessible for years, and that getting to them was still a specialty skill. How could it be that easy?

“That’s the big secret. They’re anyone’s worlds.” Philip smiled one last time, then got serious.

“But don’t think just cause its simple that it’s gonna be easy. It still takes an act of willpower. Your advantage is you’ve already been inside.”

Luke nodded repeatedly, already trying to get his mind around how he would do it. Philip blew smoke at the table in a final way and started to rock to his feet.

Luke heard his mention of Car-Crash as a kind of echo, the way words often hit with a delay due to his attention deficit, and let out a nagging question.

“So, is he getting like a finder’s fee?”

Philip stopped, taking a moment to figure out what the fuck he meant, then laughed again.

“Fuck no. He owes me more than he could ever pay back.”

“He gonna be on your team?”

Philip paused, got settled again, and leaned forward.

“I can’t tell you who is or isn’t on it till you do those three things. Got it? Now any other questions I can answer before I fuck off? Any last little nagging doubts? Cause I don’t want to hear shit besides yes sir and gunfire once we get started.”

Luke almost let him go, and then for some reason,

“Does it ever stop being fun.”

“Fun?”

“Yeah, you know, not like the waiting around and all that, but like, I guess not fun, but does it ever stop, uh,”

Lucky for him, Philip knew exactly what he was trying to say.

“You mean do you ever stop needing it?”

“Yeah.”

“No. And any smug asshole you meet who tells you otherwise, that they’ve moved on or prefer management or some shit, is lying through their teeth.”

“I wonder if it’s the being someone else.” Luke had half said it to himself, and was afraid for a moment Philip would laugh at him.

But instead, Philip had looked at him like it was the most serious topic in the world.

“Is that how you feel, really, when you’re in there? Do you really feel like someone else?”

Luke thought about that for a second, and then let it out.

“No. I feel like I’m more me than me.”

“Bingo. That’s the real you. Not this shit out here. Not this sad sap addicted to a drug that doesn’t even exist.”

Luke froze and gathered his words without breathing.

“You ever see anyone get off of it? Bliss?”

Philip surprised him by laughing softly.

“Yeah. Despite what they tell you, it ain’t super heroin. Everyone talks it up cause their selling it or they just can’t be bothered to not do it.”

Luke felt so much shame at hearing his mind vice addiction reduced to an act of carelessness that he just stared at the table.

“Let me ask you this,” Philip continued. “What do you expect to happen when you touch that light?”

Luke couldn’t think it was possible to be more embarrassed in front of the guy, so he answered honestly.

“Wake up.”

“You wake up every fucking day!” Another laugh.

“But I don’t remember any of this, so,” Luke felt awkward explaining something so obvious to what he had immediately sensed was one of the most worldly people he had ever met.

Philip saved him with another cackle.

“You wanna remember this shit?! What, you think that would make real life easier? Fuck, I don’t. Spend all day wondering if I was the real me or some Self stuck in a Hardworld. The worst thing you could do to the Real you is tell him about this shit.”

Luke was shocked by this. Every word from the guy seemed like a revelation. Like he had looked under every cranny in the Other and just said “Ok, yeah, so? Who gives a shit?” and fucked off to the Hardworlds.

And that’s exactly what he had done.

“Well, I’ll leave you to think about that one. Here’s my card. See you in the Hardworlds or not at all.”

And like that, he was gone, and Luke was left watching the Allworld drift out of frame through the window, suddenly looking smaller than it ever had.