Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the sky, candy planes dropped as Magnus flew by. The devil was flying and his ride was a sleigh. Because like all other scrooges they’d have hell to pay. With magic and bullets filling the air, Magnus engaged in festive warfare. But he wasn’t slowing, as he fought while in flight. Because he was going to end this, right here! Tonight!
Weaving through the lanes of fire, MC flew circles around the enemy, dodging their onslaught and even managed to down their planes in the process. MC replaced his slow and unwieldy rocket launcher with the ridiculously fast and far more accurate minigun. To the gingerbread men’s horror, this firearm was much more suited to MC’s tastes, making him a terribly efficient opponent. MC unleashed tens of thousands of rounds a minute, blowing enough holes into their bodies that not even crumbs would be left.
Relying on his sleigh's near-invulnerability, MC used dangerous tactics to sweep entire groups of planes away by flying directly at them, occasionally using the sleigh itself to ram his assailants clear out of the sky. The green demon left only destruction in his wake as hundreds of gingerbread lives were snuffed out with every hold of his trigger. Unfortunately, his success prompted the M.A.D. E.L.F. to take notice.
MC swerved under another squadron of candy aircraft as he aimed the rotating barrel and fired another wave of bullets from beneath his foes. MC tired of destroying the candy men, but they were nearly exterminated and it was only a matter of time until he could focus on the construct again. Feeling another pulse of Christmas energy ripple across the sky, MC whipped his neck around to see what the goliath was doing. Multiple rifts appeared in the sky, forcing MC to rethink his plans of handling the titan. The first of the entities exited the rifts in the sky, revealing that they were not additional reinforcements of gingerbread pilots, but were instead a fleet of gargantuan aircraft that put Dyn Chariots to shame. Constructed entirely of polished ice, the new 'planes' were shaped like a Christmas tree.
Following the rifts from the sky were rifts on the ground, which released snowmen the size of small skyscrapers that hurled Christmas ornaments at MC. Despite their size, the ornaments were slow and easy to dodge, but when the first ornament drew close to the sleigh, it erupted into an explosion of red, green, and white, knocking the sleigh a few hundred feet away from the blast. MC fought to stabilize it as the giant aircraft fired crystalized beams, striking his sleigh. MC's minigun fell into the snow below.
The construct itself began to shoot streaks of gold and silver at MC, adding even more for him to avoid. The battle had once again been turned around. Now, MC struggled to stay alive against the never-ending attacks that came from every angle.
“I can’t last like this! I have to stop the M.A.D. E.L.F. or this battle will never end. But how the fuck am I gonna get close to that thing?” MC was running out of ideas as the attacks grew increasingly frequent.
MC dodged the beam attack of an aircraft by a hair's breadth. The beam went on to strike an ornament behind him, which gave him an idea of how to deal with the ships. MC turned the sleigh to face the airships and began to fly directly towards it. Watching as the ship began to charge another shot, MC accelerated. Just before he smacked into the front of the ice tree, he dove straight for the ground. From directly behind him, an ornament missed where he had just been a second earlier and smacked directly against the ice ship in its path. The ornament exploded in a blast of blue, silver, and white as the ice tree shattered into a million pieces from the impact.
Confirming the tactic’s success, MC repeated it against the other ships firing at him. With half of the aircraft destroyed, MC gave himself enough breathing room to think of a plan of action.
If I can just distract it for long enough to teleport inside, then I should be able to finish this. My last weapon from the bag should be strong enough to do more than just distract him, but it would be wasted if I used it like that. Unfortunately, that leaves me with Plan B. If I die here and come back as the Ghost of Christmas Past, I swear I'll be making it YOUR problem tin can.
With what was likely the dumbest plan to have ever come to MC’s mind, he aimed the sleigh directly at the construct's core. MC's grip tightened on the reins. He took a deep breath and charged, accelerating as he went. The construct, aware of MC’s approach, summoned hundreds and thousands of rifts across the sky and ground. Rather than hesitate, MC increased his speed yet again. He'd been right not to attempt a fight of endurance with the titan.
Narrowly avoiding blast after consecutive blast, MC neared his destination amongst a backdrop of a hundred thousand ships and snowmen. All doing their best to swat the persistent insect(him) out of the sky before it could sting their creator. In a last-ditch effort, the construct used its own six-mile-long appendage to stop MC from reaching his chest, but by then it was already too late. MC repeated his harebrained tactic from earlier and fed the sleigh with more Christmas Spirit than required. Only this time, he gave it as much as he possibly could, seconds before collision.
When MC was a football field's length away from the construct’s frame, he leaped off the sleigh, standing atop an energy platform in midair. The sleigh suddenly disappeared from sight and a gaping hole formed in the construct's chest. The sheer kinetic energy from the impact blew a chunk out of the construct the size of fifty football fields and left the colossus momentarily immobile as it tried to figure out what had hit it. Capitalizing upon this opportunity, MC continuously Relocated himself closer to its body until he was standing within the gaping hole in its chest.
This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.
Shit, I hope Santa has spare sleighs. More importantly, I hope that thing doesn’t crash anywhere populated. Pretty sure that thing's well past asteroid-level damage. Judging by the energy I’m feeling, the core is somewhere near his stomach. Time to finish this.
Relocating himself through a mile of corridors and rooms, he finally neared his destination. Traveling through the construct’s rooms and various labs, MC was able to deduce that it wasn’t just the rebels that killed the researchers, but that the construct itself had been the Dyn’s demise. Multiple bodies split in half by snowflakes or stabbed to death by candy canes suggested that although the Dyn had managed to recreate Santa’s magic, they had not been able to control it.
MC approached the chamber that housed the core to find several dead amoebas inside the room, likely having protected the core room with their shield spells.
“So at least now I know which magic is stronger. Santa’s stuff is top shelf shit,” MC joked. Fantasy magic really was inferior to fairy tale magic.
He trained his gaze on the levitating orb of energy contained within the reinforced glass pod at the center of the room. MC took out the last gun he had in his bag. This one looked like a weird amalgamation of several different firearms combined into one incredibly impractical mess. MC held it in his hands with a rueful look and smiled.
“What a stupid thing to ask for. A gun that self-destructs when you pull the trigger. I know better now that I have reasons to survive. Because no matter how many lives I have to take, I can’t afford to die. Not before I see Nina walk the aisle with her loving husband. Before she has kids, and those kids have kids, and they all grow up happily in a world that cares about their lives. I’ve grown a lot since then,” MC ruminated, pressing the gun against the pod. “So this Christmas, all I want is for someone to live, not to die.”
He pulled the trigger, then teleported away as far as his ability could take him, reappearing in the sky.
As he fell, MC watched the colossal being in front of him release an incandescent glow. His vision turned a blinding white. The construct detonated in the most beautiful display of color he'd ever seen. The nightscape turned as bright as day as streaks of energy danced across the sky, tangled in a vivid display of creation. The colors stretched as far as his eyes could see. A childish wonder that had long been left behind surfaced one last time at the brilliant spectacle.
Ignoring his throbbing head pain, MC created another energy platform beneath himself and laid down to watch the sky. With Santa hopefully safe at Sanctuary, MC decided to catch his breath and enjoy himself a little before his trek back. Losing himself in the radiant sky, he lay on the platform and daydreamed with wide eyes.
When the spectacle finally finished, he decided it was time to head back, knowing full well that the journey would take him weeks now that he'd have to hurl himself across the sky thousands of miles away. But before he could start, his surroundings vanished and he suddenly found himself beside his sister in Sanctuary’s living area.
“What the fuck? What just happened?” MC asked in disbelief, shooting glances left and right.
“Calm down Magnus, you’re alright. Santa brought you back with his magic when he told me that you were done sightseeing. You did it, Magnus, you saved Christmas!” Nina gripped her brother in a fierce hug as she showered him in praise. Noticing a plump man and an angel walk into the room, she reluctantly let her brother go.
“Ho ho ho, you’ve done it Magnus my boy. You’ve saved my life. You’ve saved Christmas. And you may have even saved the galaxy. I think that deserves being placed on the Nice List. Don’t you?” Santa gave MC a large, jolly smile. His skin had become so healthy that he was glowing, and as for his belly? It was as round as his heart was large.
MC replied with a grin. “Naughty list, Nice List, it doesn’t really matter. Either way, you don’t give me what I ask for, you old bastard.” MC said as he grabbed Santa’s preferred hand in a shake.
The energy in his body was sucked right out of him, leaving him feeling drained and exhausted. With a burst of light that blinded everyone present, the process was done. Santa was gone.
In his place, lights decorations of reds, golds, and greens dotted Sanctuary. Wreaths hung on every door, stockings pinned on every wall. A tree was even placed in the living room, fully decked in festive vanity. And left in MC’s hand was a note with a single sentence.
“I did this year,” MC smirked, having already forgotten the millions of questions he needed to ask the man before he left. He turned towards Nova, his appearance back to normal, his green fur long gone.
“Umm, Merry Christmas Magnus,” Nova mumbled, worried she hadn’t said the correct phrase.
“Merry Fucking Christmas Nova, Nina. So, who wants to play poker?”
END