Granny Holly looked at Richard with a smile dripping with honey. On any other grandmother, that smile would have looked absolutely warm and beautiful but on Granny Holly’s face, the smile gave the effect of making her look terrifying.
It wasn’t like she did anything to him and she could very well be a very kind old lady but Richard couldn’t get over the scary atmosphere around Granny Holly’s smile.
“Have you met any fake witches? I don’t think there could be any fake witches in the first place. The moment you grab a broom and put on the robes and a pointy hat, you become a witch. If you have a crystal ball and a cauldron then you’ve practically mastered half of witchcraft.”
Richard was confused by Granny Holly’s answer. He wasn’t sure whether it was a joke or if she was being serious. It certainly didn’t sound like a joking tone to him. But then, what does it mean that there are no fake witches? Can anyone put on the dress and become a witch?
Granny Holly sipped on the viscous green soup while observing the changes in Richard’s expressions. “You seem confused. What part didn’t you understand?”
Richard cautiously asked, “Can anyone who dresses like you become a witch? Can I become a witch and use magic if I put it on?”
It didn’t matter to Richard that he had to put on a gown and hat if it meant he could use magic. He wasn’t entirely sure if magic existed in this world but from everything he had witnessed so far, he had a feeling that this was definitely a magical world.
Granny Holly began laughing. Well, it was more of a cackling than laughing but she threw back her head and laughed vigorously. The hat impressively stayed on her head though. “Kakakak! You are a funny one. Why would a boy want to be a witch? Only women become witches, men become wizards.”
The creepy laughter rang out in the inn. Even the walls seemed too scared to absorb the sound as it continued being reflected around and reverberating inside the inn until the energy died down. Willum who heard the laugh sneaked his head from the kitchen door before quickly going back in as if hiding.
While his legs were shaking and almost giving out, Richard swallowed dry saliva and asked again, “So, can I become a wizard if I put on a robe and a hat?”
His back was soaked with cold sweat and his entire body was going limp but somehow Richard managed to swallow the fear originating from deep within his soul and continued looking at Granny Holly with desperate and pleading eyes.
He was a coward but he was also smart. Since he had already gotten on the back of the proverbial back of the tiger by asking the first question, he continued the line of questioning. When you exceed a certain level of fear, it stops mattering if things get scarier.
“No, you can become a witch by dressing like one. But to become a wizard, you have to go to school and study all kinds of numbers and theories. You have to wear the robe and pointy hat to become a proper wizard though. No self-respecting witch or wizard goes out without his/her robe and hat. Anyway, why do you want to become a wizard? Is there a dragon you have to slay or a kingdom to overthrow?”
Granny Holly answered with a gentle tone after having controlled her laughter. Her expression was much more pleasant than the time she first entered the inn a while ago. The amusing questions and the laughter seemed to have lifted her mood.
As it happens in most stories, the only reason a kid from a small town or village learns magic or swordsmanship is to go on a quest. They get out of their small towns and boring lives, find companions along the way, overcome obstacles, grow stronger, and finally complete their quest.
In her time, Granny Holly has seen many heroes adventuring around the world. Some were on a quest to slay the dragon that burned down their village, some wanted to overthrow an evil ruler, some wanted to save a princess, and some just wanted to find a lot of treasures. Granny Holly had acquainted herself with quite a few of the heroes in her younger years.
No matter the reason, there were many heroes and quests. There were so many of them that they had their own Heroes’ Guild. Her witching sense was telling her that something was special about the boy. So, it wasn’t very surprising for Granny Holly that the boy in front of her wanted to become a wizard.
It wasn’t to say that Richard was any more special than other heroes that she had met. There were far too many special beings walking around in the world. She just happened to become interested in Richard by chance.
Richard wasn’t sure how to answer Granny Holly’s question. There was so much to unpack from what she had told him. Does it mean that he has to go to school to learn magic to become a wizard? Why is it so complicated to become a wizard when you can become a witch just by putting on the clothes?
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While considering many questions, Richard answered Granny Holly’s questions first. He felt that making her wait too long for the answer would not be good for him. “I don’t have any grand quests to accomplish, I just want to learn magic.”
“And why do you want to learn magic? Surely there is something you would like to do after learning magic?” Granny Holly continued the questioning.
Richard had calmed down quite a bit at this point. He was slowly easing into the flow of the conversation led by Granny Holly. He answered after looking around. “I just thought that it would be fun and make life easier. Wouldn’t it be great if I could cast a spell to clean this inn immediately? All the stick grime and grease would come off on its own with a wave of a hand.”
Granny Holly grinned at Richard’s answer. “You have such fanciful ideas about magic. Why would you use magic for cleaning? Just get some alcohol and cleaning bleach and the grease will come right off. There is no need to use magic for such a simple thing.”
Richard didn’t back off at that and insisted on his answer, “But you have to put in a lot of time and effort to do it manually. There is also the cost of alcohol and bleach. But if you use magic, there is no need to spend any time, effort, or money. How great is that?”
A long sigh escaped Granny Holly’s mouth and quickly went out of the window. “This is the problem with kids these days,” she spoke, “they think that magic is an all-powerful tool that they can use to wave away all the difficult problems in life that require even a bit of effort. You think it is as easy as waving your hand and cleaning the place?”
Richard was taken aback by the serious tone of voice from Granny Holly that came out of nowhere. The way she was speaking was typical of an old person complaining about the ‘young kids these days’. Unsure about what to say, Richard kept quiet but Granny Holly Kept going.
“There are no magic spells for things like that. If you start using magic for small things like that, then what will people do? Magic should be used for greater things, not to avoid a bit of hard work. Magic isn’t meant to make life easier. The gods wouldn’t like that.”
It was an absurd statement. Richard hadn’t seen any gods but he had seen Death so there was no reason for him not to believe in the existence of gods. It would be weirder if such a bizarre world did not have any gods. But he couldn’t understand why using magic to make life easier could offend the gods.
It was also a mystery why there were no magic spells for things like cleaning or washing up. In all the fiction that he had read about in his past life, all kinds of spells were used for household chores.
If it doesn’t exist, I can create such a spell when I learn magic myself.
Although Grandma Holly’s words had put a damper on his enthusiasm, Richard didn’t lose his motivation. There was no need to sulk over a cleaning spell not existing when he couldn’t even use magic. It would be enough to learn or create spells for daily life when he learns magic.
He wanted to ask more questions but Richard could sense that Grandma Holly was starting to get annoyed. It wasn’t that Richard was very good at picking up on subtle changes in emotions but a heavy sense of annoyance was radiating from Grandma Holly’s body.
The calm and steady imaginary particles of the cheerful and light atmosphere were being invaded and stuck by the excitable and jumpy particles. There was a non-negligible chance that one of the excitable particles would collide with the calm particles and an explosion would occur.
All of this was happening on a different plane of existence where ‘atmosphere’ and ‘mood’ existed. But some people like Grandma Holly had the natural gift of projecting the changes in the plane of ‘mood’ into reality without having to do anything. The people around them, no matter how clueless, were able to easily recognize the changes in their moods and instantly cater to those changes.
Even among these special existences, Grandma Holly was one of the people with an above-average influence on the ‘mood’ plane so Richard was able to feel the changes in her emotions with all his body. It wasn’t just him who felt the changes though, Willum stuck his head out of the kitchen door and shouted at Richard, “Why are you disturbing the guests!? Come to the kitchen and help me.”
Richard slightly bowed his head towards Grandma Holly as a greeting and an apology and quickly ran to the kitchen. Grandma Holly continued to smile and drink her soup while looking at the receding back of Richard with shining eyes.
The kitchen was not too big with multiple pots and cauldrons simmering over the fire on all sides. It looked like the inn always had a selection of three to four stews and soups going at all times. There was also a giant brick oven to the side with a roaring fire inside it.
Old man Willum, with his hands sticky with wet dough, held Richard’s shoulders tightly and glared at him. His eyes were burning with the same fury as the fire in the oven. But just when Richard braced himself for a loud shout, scolding him, he only heard a whisper, “What the hell were you doing? I signaled you to keep quiet and clean. Why are you annoying Grandma Holly?”
The accusatory whisper had as much anger in it as it had fear. Richard could feel just how much Old Man Willy was scared of Grandma Holly just from that whisper. Old man Willum’s eyes were trembling and so were his feet. He was holding Richard’s shoulders for support.
“I was just having a conversation with her. I wasn’t trying to offend her or anything.” Richard answered back in a whisper. He felt wronged. It wasn’t like he said anything offensive. And he was going to stop the questioning anyway. He didn’t want to annoy the guest either.
“Well, if you had really offended or annoyed her we wouldn’t be having this conversation anyway. You would probably have been turned into an animal of some kind. Most probably a cat or a frog, she especially likes those two. Anyway, don’t disturb any of the guests. Understand?”
Old Man Willum mumbled to himself before warning Richard. Grandma Holly was well-known around Dingie Hills for her mood swings. Even among the circle of witches who naturally tend to be impetuous, Grandma Holly had an infamous reputation.
Only when Richard nodded in affirmation, Old Man Willum sighed and pointed to the wood pile, “Don’t go out until Grandma Holly leaves. Help me take care of the fire. We need all the stews bubbling by the time guests arrive.”