"Uh," Meg said.

"Gah!" Chuck said.

"Guys? Can you say something else? You're really scaring me," Monster said.

Chuck stared at his dog--his talking dog--before bringing a hand to his forehead. "This is a dream," he said. "I have a fever. I'm still tripping from those pills." He slapped himself. "Wake up, Chuck! Wake up!"

"I don't think this is a dream," Monster said. He looked wildly around the kitchen. "Unless you see any rabbits? Usually, my dreams have a lot of rabbits."

Chuck could only continue to stare at his dog in amazement. "This has got to be the weirdest day of my life," he said.

Meg, who'd had more time to adopt a willing suspension of disbelief, recovered more quickly. "Those pills made it so you can talk," she said to Monster. "My god. Chuck, Monster can talk!"

Monster looked nervous. "I can?" he said. As he heard himself, his eyes widened in surprise. "Oh, look at that. I guess I can!"

Chuck still didn't know what to say, but Meg laughed and leaned against the fridge, the relief evident on her face. "I thought I'd killed you," she said. "What did you see when you took the pills? Did you see the computer, too?"

"Computer?" Monster looked confused. "Like the thing in Chuck's treehouse?" Meg nodded. "No, I didn't see a computer. I saw a very pretty lady dog, and she said, 'Monster, you are such a good boy that I'm going to give you magic powers. And guess what? Since you're a dog, your biology works differently than that of humans, so you won't even stink afterward like Chuck. Gee, remember that, guys? When Chuck smelled so badly I thought I would die?"

"That was fifteen minutes ago," Chuck said.

"So it was! Man, that was bad! It was worse than when I caught a rabbit and ate it and threw up everywhere, and you didn't know for five hours, and the throwup just baked in the sun. Pesky rabbits!"

Chuck continued to stare at Monster. He'd often wished his dog could talk, and now... he shook his head, still unable to believe what was happening. He had superpowers, and Monster could talk!

Meg interrupted his thoughts. "You ate the last two pills, so does that mean you get two powers?" she asked. It was a good question, and Chuck was upset with himself for not asking first.

"I'm not sure!" Monster said. "I can definitely talk. That's new! Oh, and I can also do this!"

Suddenly, Monster's fur elongated, forming a single brown-and-black braid that stretched from his back to the counter ten feet away.

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"Whoa!" Chuck said as he jumped backward to avoid the questing braid.

The ends of the braid formed fingers that lifted the roast beef, and then the fur snapped back into Monster's back like a rubber band, depositing the quarter pound of meat on the floor before him. "Yay!" Monster said, the exclamation followed by a half dozen happy yips. He dug into the meat, heedless of the deli paper he ate along with it. "Now I can get into the fridge whenever I want!"

Chuck looked at Meg, who stared back at him. We're clearly thinking the same thing, he thought.

"We've got to figure out what's going on here," he said right as she said, "The three of us are going to be the greatest crime-fighting trio in the world!"

The moment was followed by a pause where the only sound in the room was Monster happily scarfing down his roast beef. "Uh, what?" Chuck said after a moment.

Meg looked at him quizzically. "Isn't this what you've always wanted?" she said. "Look around your treehouse--you have more graphic novels than a jock has dirty socks. And you've been training for this! The only thing you're missing is the public persona. We've been building a name for me, so why not embrace your own? And we can get Monster into the mix. Evil won't stand a chance. Think about it, Chuck! This is destiny."

"I have no idea what destiny means, but if it involves more roast beef, you can count me in!" Monster said. "Jaybird, Fur Dog, and Builder Buddy! Huzzah!"

Meg glanced down at him. "That's not going to work," she said. "I'm Jaybird. You're Monster. Chuck is Machina."

Monster cheerfully lolled his tongue at her. "Oh, those are much better names. And this way, I won't forget mine. That has happened before, especially when I've been distracted by food!"

Chuck had to admit it was a compelling proposition, but he still wasn't convinced. "You don't think people will put things together?" he said slowly. "Pittsburgh isn't the biggest town. One masked vigilante might slip under the radar, but two? And a talking dog? That's not exactly inconspicuous."

"I don't know what inconspicuous means, but if it involves killing rabbits, then--"

Meg tossed her hair, and Chuck knew he was in trouble; she always did that when she was about to dig in her heels on something. "I don't know what it means, either," she sniffed. "But I think I understand from context. You're worried we're going to get outed."

"Exactly," Chuck said. "It was one thing to train, to pretend, but..." Chuck didn't want to voice his fear, but it was now or never. "Meg, you've been putting yourself in danger every night, and I respect the heck out of you for doing it. You're trying to make the world a better place. But if we do this, we're going to attract global attention. We're going to put targets on our backs in huge neon lights. I'm worried that if we take this further, we'll find ourselves dealing with the types of enemies who make the Chef look like Ms. Henshaw."

Meg snorted a laugh. "Is this Ms. Henshaw extremely powerful?" Monster asked.

"On the contrary," Chuck said.

"Ah," Monster said. "I see."

To her credit, Meg seemed to carefully consider Chuck's fears. However, after a moment, she said, "I think it's a little too late for that. We have millions of views on YouTube."

"We could still disappear."

Meg shook her head. "But I won't. Have you ever heard the phrase 'Do or don't do? There is no try?'"

"It's, 'Do or do not.' But yes."

"That's Socrates, right?" Monster said.

"Yoda," Chuck and Meg said at the same time.

"Oh," Monster said quietly. "I thought it sounded too smart for Socrates."

Chuck stared at his best friend. "It's not too late," he said quietly. "We could... well, I don't know what we could do, but this is the threshold. Once we cross, there's no going back."

Meg met his gaze without blinking. "You asked for this," she said. "Now it's here, and you can't run away."