It was a time of chaos. The universal balance had been shifted, and the tremors caused by the imbalance shook the Earth to its core. Meanwhile, on that Earth, a god lay dying.
This god was as old as time, but had only been in physical form for about half a decade, had sleek, well groomed hair and a thick, maticulously combed beard. He wore a black suit with a red tie, the only imperfection visible his eyes, his left being deep blue, and the right being dark red. If he was going to die, he may as well die in style. He was in pain, however, and when a dove-winged young girl with horns, elf like ears and welding goggles walked past he tried to ask for death. "Hey! Miss! Down here!" The girl looked at him "Oh hey! What's your name?"
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"Cha- Chuck, my name is Chuck" He tried to sit up as the girl cheerily replied "Cool, I'm Adrian!" Chuck was in too much was in to deal with pleasantries "Look, Adrian, are you going to help or not?" Adrian nodded frantically "I'll just go grab my brother's soul, stay there!" She skipped off as Chuck lay, unable to move, and wondered how Adrian was going to kill him with her brother's soul.
He thought about this for a good while, before Adrian came skipping back, holding a bloody rolling pin and a small glass jar "Oi! Chuck Norris!" Chuck looked at her "Ok, Adrian, that isn't my name, I'm a god. Also, I'm dying." Adrian nodded "I noticed! Also, what kind of God is called Chuck?" Chuck groaned "My... Parents named me when I was born into physical form." He spat out the word parents as if he hated it "oooh, Chuckie got Daddy issues?" Adrian laughed at her own joke and raised her glass jar "Keep still!" Chuck closed his eyes, and as the glass smashed over his over his face everything went dark .