Yawn. I cracked my fingers and looked straight at my computer screen, typing out my delicious fantasies on a random fanfiction site that probably no one would notice. But I didn’t care. My inner joy and tensions revolved around fiction—specifically of a certain girl. The beautiful and captivating purple-haired girl named Akemi from the show Magick-Based Girls Are Real and Eccentric! She was a prepubescent, whatever-year-old Lolita who captured the essence of pureness but had that badass goth aspect. I’m not going to lie—I felt like a total creep, and yeah, I probably was, but hey, ever since I was 10, I’d been into loli characters, and I just never stopped. Even well into my 20s and into my early 30s, I couldn’t say I wanted to stop being a virgin; I just wanted to be close to someone like that.
I continued to type out some parts of my fanfiction, leading up to the spicy parts. “The main character, who looks to be in his early 30s (yes, I’m not above self-inserts!), with a love for innocence, meets this domineering short girl who turns out to be a vampire! She stalks him close and then knocks him down, her chest pressing against his… The man’s breath starts to hasten, and then he tries to peek up her skirt to see her underwear… She smirks and says, ‘Human, how futile any type of resistance you could muster would be! I could just use you as a stepping stool!’ The man nods and replies, ‘Oh no, please don’t!’ He nudges his eye further up sneakily. The hot girl vampire then jumps on the—”
HUH? I raised my eyebrow as my screen went blank.
“Ma! What the heck? Did you trip the breaker again?” I got up, shaking my head. “All my damn typing is gone again!” I crossed my arms and pouted, walking to my mother’s room. I put my hands on the doorframe as she looked at me and said, “I tried to see if tripping the breaker to this room would help this crappy charger I have.”
I raised an eyebrow. “That’s not even how that works, plus you did the wrong room! Can you please just not touch any electrical stuff? I don’t wanna see you electrocute yourself. Was it this difficult to take care of me as a kid?”
She chuckled and got up. “Oh, Carter, if you just had a kid, you’d find out awfully quickly.”
I fixed my face in a pout and said, “Oh, forget that. I definitely will!” She responded, “Try harder.”
I rolled my eyes and walked across the house and out the front door. I looked outside… the sky was blue, and the grass was green in the suburb. Nothing seems out of the ordinary today. I continued walking down to the curb when I noticed my father standing at the mailbox, grabbing the mail. He looked far different from how he used to, year after year, and it concerned me.
I walked up to him and helped him get out the rest of the mail. “Why did you decide to get the mail today?”
He looked up at me and adjusted his glasses. “Ya know, son, I do feel a bit bad for us bothering you with our problem of getting old… I just want to do something for you.”
I smiled and waved my hand. “Oh no, Dad, you guys already did your 18 years… (or really 26…) of raising me!” I scratched my head awkwardly.
He looked at me and said, “You know how I barely was an actual good and supportive pa to you, kid? Well, how about we do something we barely ever did… catch?”
He suddenly threw up the letters in the air as I opened my eyes wide. My eyes scrambled over, and I noticed something… something so majestic I thought I was merely dreaming… that legendary pink note. It must be an illusion. I reached my hand out and caught the letter. I brought it down to my face as I broke the envelope. The letter read:
Hello there, LOLITA lovers! We all welcome you to a very, very special occasion for you and us—a free, all-expenses-paid trip to LOLITA LAND!!!! Yes, the legends are true! An all-expenses-paid trip to LOLITA LAND©, with all the risqué encounters with the lolis you so wish were real… Now! We only sent this out to the most devoted to their craft, so no time to waste! Go to the location on the letter and we will make your dreams come true, and say the magic words…Watashi no wandārando e tsureteitte (Take me to my wonderland!).
I looked at the letter and read it about a gazillion times before yelling out loud, “YES!!!”
My dad looked at me like I’d finally lost my mind as I teared up from excitement and happiness. I got up and dusted myself off. “It’s real, Dad! I’m going to my dream world!”
He smirked and said, “Just don’t let it consume you, kid.”
I stood there, thinking I couldn’t believe the legend was real. On my site I created, LlovasforLs, there was a rumor that such a place existed. I just thought it was some internet bullshit meme, but I was amazed. I ran back inside to pack my stuff and called off work for the remainder of the week. “Haha, no more accountant clutz Carter anymore!”
Before jumping up and getting into my car, I checked in with my parents, letting them know I’d be gone for a while and that I hired a maid to take care of them while I was away. After that, I drove to the location on the letter… which was strangely in the middle of nowhere in… Wyoming? (Like seriously, what the hell is in Wyoming?)
I finally arrived at the location, which seemed to be a decent-sized valley between two small mountains. I got out of my car with my bag on my back and the sun shining. I was wearing my casual purple shirt with the design displaying: A chair is too cold, how ’bout you sit where this text is? My hair was combed down, and I looked around and saw no other cars. I walked toward the side of the mountain facing me and cleared my throat to utter the mystic words:
“WATASHI NO WANDĀRANDO E TSURETEITTE!”
I grinned with tenacity as I stood there a bit awkwardly with my mouth open when suddenly a passage opened up. I looked inside, but it was pretty dark.
“They could have at least put a light in here or something…” I muttered as I stepped in. The passage immediately closed behind me, causing me to jump a bit. I continued on for a few minutes, stepping over rocks and probably the occasional spider, when I started to hear some commotion. I picked up my speed and began to see color and light. I walked out and saw an extravagant pink mansion with the words LOLITA LAND on the front.
I marveled and gazed at the sight. I noticed the branching buildings off to the side and the moat of water surrounding the back and the sides. I snapped out of my trance and looked down, immediately entering another one… it was my first sight. My heart seemed to stop as I noticed rows of delicate-looking, somehow innocent yet feisty-looking girls with colored hair, equipped with thigh socks that perfectly shaped their legs, with thigh curves like the ocean. There were about 30 of them, and the tallest one only came up to my lower chest. It takes a real artist to appreciate the human body, but all I could express was:
“FUCK YESSS!!” I yelled with my arms in the air.
The girls and the other fellow lolicons who were invited looked back at me.
“Oh, uh… what’s up! So… how’s the… weather?”
The tallest of the girls walked up to me. Her skirt was black with red hearts on it, and she was wearing a crop top with purple stripes and thigh socks with straps around her legs. She came up to me and started to put her pale, smooth-skinned hands on my arm.
“Hello, mister… you are also one of the very sweet boys that came to play with us,” she said as she nudged her thigh up to my leg.
I looked at her and turned MAXIMUM RED! I started to stutter and yelled in surprise, “NANITE KOTODAA~!!”
I shook my head and then said, “Y-yeah, that’s me… I’m a… sweet boy!” I then started to get lightheaded and lost my balance, starting to fall on her. Her eyes opened, and she gritted her teeth in surprise. BOING! I looked down and noticed I wasn’t injured. She had somehow caught herself with her arms in a reverse plank position.
I gasped but got up and bowed. “Sorry, sorry! I’m still a damn klutz!! Thankfully, your breasts managed to break my fall. Also, your core has to be pretty strong for that!”
I scratched the back of my head and chuckled.
I heard some footsteps behind me, and the girl and I simultaneously looked toward the source of the noise. “Hahaha” A middle-aged man with greying hair in a crimson suit and tie walked up and smirked.
(This guy must be important… too snazzy not to be.)
He walked up, his presence dominating the space as he spoke, “Oh, Sayuri, you’re already getting frisky with the guests. We can’t skip to there just yet; we have to wine and dine our friends here!”
Sayuri flipped up and nodded, “Yes, boss.”
“Woah…” I focused my attention on him. “Hey sir, are you like, the manager of this wonderland by chance?”
He nodded, “Yeah, you got it right. I am indeed the man behind this… place. The name's William. And you must’ve heard the rumors of this location before, haven’t you, Mr. Carter?”
I shook my head, trying to piece everything together. “Uh, yeah, I heard that this ‘Lolita Wonderland’ was a place and even saw a picture of it that looks… like what it looks like in real life. Always assumed it was some bullshit meme from an anime meme circlejerk sub. How exactly does this place exist?”
William turned his back, speaking with a hint of arrogance, “I’ve personally learned that with experimentation and a bit of patience, you really can accomplish anything.”
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Sayuri chimed in, “We all have.”
“I know, but I mean… you know… the dudes in blue… how is this… legal?” I questioned, my voice tinged with concern.
He turned back, sarcasm dripping from his tone, “You came to a Lolita Wonderland wondering if it was legal? My, oh my… just enjoy your once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, eh?”
I rubbed my head, feeling the absurdity of it all. “Well yeah, I guess all of this is pretty nonsensical anyways… I wonder, how did you uh… locate us?”
William smirked, “Well, I mean, thanks to your website, it literally wasn’t anything hard at all to do. You really make it easy for the guys in blue, to be honest.”
“Yeah, you’re right… but hey, it technically isn’t illegal. It’s just imaginary characters, right?”
He raised an eyebrow, “You might want to consult our law books again. Then again, well, no one enforces it really, but hey, you won’t ever have to worry about that again.” He placed his hand on my shoulder, a smile on his face. “Well now, let’s go and make our way to our dining spot. I know most of you are hungry from such a long trip.” William turned and walked into a side entrance of the mansion.
I nodded and followed him, studying the building’s layout as we walked. The hallway was lined with doors leading to various rooms, each door labeled with Japanese kanji and English translations, most of them saying “Private Room” and such. I glanced back and noticed a group of people following—assumedly the other "cons" who had been invited, most of them similar to me.
We eventually entered a spacious cafeteria-like area with a giant glass ceiling, the pink-tinted glass casting a rosy hue over everything. The walls were regular glass, overlooking the moat and the surrounding areas. Rows of tables and chairs were arranged neatly across the floor, already stocked with plates, utensils, and golden bowls filled with treats, tasty protein, and desserts. I walked over to a chair and sat down.
William addressed the room, “Hey girls, help your guests to some food and set their plates, why won’t you? They’ve already done too much as guests.” The girls nodded and began to scour the area for people to serve.
As I looked around, I noticed one girl who seemed a bit disgruntled, scanning the room with a sharp gaze before her eyes landed on me. She sighed, her appearance striking—a cat girl, with tan cat ears and a long tan tail. She wore gloves and a crop top emblazoned with the design of “Nekomushi Mushi!” and carried a huge backpack. It was a semi-obscure Japanese show about two stray cats—a really cute show.
“Hey, you like Mushi?” I asked, trying to break the ice.
She jerked her head towards me, eyeing my shirt before snapping, “At least try to act like you have some sort of decency.” With that, she sighed and walked away down a nearby hall.
William walked up to me, raising his hand as if to signal her to stop, but she ignored him. He turned to me with an awkward chuckle, “She’ll be with you shortly…”
“Huh… that was interesting,” I muttered. A younger guy with a fedora and a button-up shirt had snuck up beside me without me noticing.
“Woah, you snuck up so fast. How the hell didn’t I see you?” I asked, startled.
He chuckled, “Probably too busy talking to that girl. I ain’t blaming you, though.”
I sighed, “So you saw that, huh? Well… that’s honestly not too different from my usual interactions with the other gender,” I laughed at myself.
“Oh, you looked at me and assumed I do any better?” he retorted.
“You make a good point, man… what’s your name?” I asked.
He tipped his fedora, “Just call me Henry!”
I nodded, “That name fits you. I’m Carter!” I held out my hand, thinking to myself, *Fedora and all… this guy really is true to the craft.* He interrupted my thought by saying, “Yeah, don’t shake my hand. You should know,” shooting me a serious look.
“Nah, just messing around, I wash my hands,” I responded, cautiously shaking his hand with an awkward smile.
“So you’re user CraftyKarrt, huh?” Henry asked.
“Uh, how’d you figure?” I replied.
“Well, your name is Carter, and to be honest, you give off that vibe. And, well, I usually try to ask this to like-minded individuals, but I’m curious—what stuff are you into, dude?”
I started to think to myself, “Well, one of them is clearly obvious… uh…”
“What about a little sibling on sibling, haha? You know it’s a common trope, eh?” he nudged me, chuckling.
“Hell no! That’s something I never quite got, honestly… family bonding shouldn’t be perverse too… I know it sounds crazy coming from me, but that’s not my thing, you know?”
Henry looked surprised, “Huh, so you do have morals… kind of twisted and a bit redundant, though,” he said while rubbing his chin.
“Oh, you have a fedora; you can’t talk.” I shot back.
Henry picked up a cookie that was shaped like a girl removing her panties and winking. “Huh… what kind of cookies are these?” he asked, chuckling.
I took a look, “Huh… is this place like a factory? No way another company actually makes these.”
Henry snickered, “Maybe some short bronze-skinned minions are around here somewhere?”
I gagged, “Hopefully not, or it will be sweet but deadly, experience.”
He cracked up, “No man, that is just downright murderous. You know how many of those things in that thing actually kill!”
I nodded, lowering my voice, “You know, that is kind of poetic greed, in a whole wonderland-like area, with it eventually consuming and ending you.”
Henry nodded, “Hey, look, she’s back. I’ll not barge in,” he said as he got up, presumably to get a drink.
I looked up and saw the cat girl from earlier, Isa, walking up with a somewhat annoyed look on her face as she sat down. She looked at me with her ruby eyes and sighed, “Yeah, I forgot to do the thing…” She stood up, grabbed her skirt, and then bowed, “Welcome to Lolita Land! Where all your dreams about cute anime chicks come true!” (Is what I would have said if she didn’t, uh, just mostly look off and mumble the first couple parts of that.)
“That was kind of cringeworthy… so what the heck do I look like when I randomly say Japanese words and phrases I should have absolutely no chance in knowing!!” I groaned, putting my face in my hands.
She looked at me and replied, “You look more disappointed in life than I am.”
I laughed a bit, “That’s a pretty crazy achievement, and hey, that’s actually kind of funny.”
Isa shifted in her seat, looking to the left while putting her hand on her chin. “About… Nekomushi, you better not ruin that show for me because Neko actually is wholesome… two misfit ignored cats on an adventure… while you are probably pushing 40, creep…” she said, glancing at me.
“I bet you can’t even recite the M—” I began to retort.
“Omae Wa Mou Shindeiru!” I shouted, pointing to my phone, which I had pulled out, showing a video of me singing the main theme song to it years ago.
Isa looked surprised and stunned, “You’re even doing the adlibs… that’s a pretty discrete show, you know.”
I nodded, but suddenly, my phone was no longer in my hand. Confused, I looked up to see Henry holding my phone, browsing through it. My heart jumped out of my chest as I quickly locked in. I could almost hear my ancestors in my ear telling me not to let them down… not to let him see my tabs. I quickly jumped up, grabbed my phone, and deleted the tabs in under half a second.
Isa spoke up, “You know, if you were thinking you were hearing something, it was just me telling you to get your phone back because you look like the type to need incognito.” She sighs. Henry laughs and I sigh. Then William walks back into the area and says “We have set up the private rooms now.. everyone can set up their little dates with the girls, everyone here has to be in their rooms though.. I will get the girls to pass the numbers out.”
He walks off and then I see various girls take notes and I look up and see cat girl sitting down. “Here.” She flicks it towards me.
It reads, room “67”. I also see Sayuri joyfully walk next to Henry and give him his note. He then walks next to me and notices mine “Hey not bad, bro we are close to eachother, we are just a couple rooms away, imma visit you!” I shrug “Sure bro we can do that.” Sayuri walks up and nods as well “Perfect!”. She then looks at the cat girl. “Isa let’s go.” Isa then responds by sighing.
Sayuri then begins to lead us to the room. She looks at the clock and then nods as she eventually stops at the door and welcomes us in. I look around the room and I sit down on the bed and I notice Henry sit down on the opposite side of the bed. Sayuri walks over and giggles and grabs Henry’s hands.
She looks at Isa “Isa!!! You gotta do this too girl.”
Isa starts to get look more peeved in general as she sits next to me and looks at me with a tired expression. Sayuri suddenly pulls Henry down and licks her lips. “Oh woah, you are pretty strong aren’t you… girl?” She laughs “Ah yes I’m strong but I will always feel like I need your touch.. so big and strong huh.?” She then licks the front of his fedora and pulls him closer.
Isa looks intently as I see some sweat fall down her face and she looks down a bit gripping her backpack straps.
“I want to lick something else, Henry..” “Then do it.” He replies. She smirks and then looks at her bandaged wrist. He then looks at it too and then says “Well.. I bet you probably are one of those kids who had a tragic backstory and goes to older men to find comfort huh?”
She continues to look at her bandages and zone out. “Hey Sayuri..” She looks up at him and a sharp blade falls out underneath her bandages…
She grabs it in her mouth and she gives him a chilling smirk. She then uses her head as a stabbing thrust straight into the side of his neck.
*SHIV*
I open my eyes widely as I scream in terror. “WHAT THE FUCK!” I see her grab his back and continue to saw into his neck with his blood seeping out like some type of slaughterhouse… I hear him scream and I see the complete fervor and intoxication in her face blushing mixing with the red fluid… I suddenly I start to hear a jingle throughout the speakers of the room and the halls “Ring.. around the Rosie..”
The Tv comes on and shows probably dozens of cameras around the building. One of them expands onto the tv and shows a small girl on screen bloody holding a head of someone as she looks silently into the camera.
“Dregs of society! Not one of you will be missed, we are taking care of the trash, no hard feelings..” as soon as the girl stops talking a hear a loud gash noise as something hits the floor.
I look back and see Sayuri take the knife out her mouth and licks the blood off it in a seductive manner. “Oh my.. god.. you… “hmhm” she says as she turns to Isa. “Let me see you do it now Isa” Isa’s ears twitch and she quickly opens her backpack and pulls out a large metal weapon that looks like a metal giant cat paw claw connected to a large rod that she twirls around her body.
She then looks at me and then sighs and slowly swings the clawpaw at me as it gets stuck in the wall. She doesn’t move as she just takes the weapon out as she adjusts her body.
“I’ll show you how it’s done.” She laughs as she jumps out the bed so fast the curtains around the windows fly off.. I look at Isa real quick and see her look almost expressionless and spaced out towards the wall holding her clawpaw, and then I see Sayuri rushing towards me as I grab the door knob and turn it to run out the room. *thump *thump *thump as I run but Sayuri suddenly grabs me shoulder and throws me through a nearby window.
“AGH!!!” I yell as I squint my eyes from the pink colored glass debris from the walls and I see Sayuri running across the hallway to jump out the window in front of where I am. I decide to try to run across the walkway across to other next side of the mansion. I run and I pant as I try to gain speed.
Sayuri starts to run on all fours and she zips next to me. She takes out the knife again and slashes aiming at my neck “Useless Isa, haha!” She laughs as I hear a loud clang. *CLANG*. I look and see Sayuri and Isa in an extremely intense, locked struggle with Sayuri’s knife and Isa’s clawpaw. Isa is gritting her teeth as her skirt flows up from the wind. “Oh you trying this again huh!” Sayuri says while in a struggle against Isa.
Sayuri then kicks her leg and grabs a multitude of throwing knives and throws dozens at her. Isa quickly deflects the knives and says “I’m about sick of you!!!” Sayuri smirks and then as she’s smiling with her shining teeth, she throws a punch that hits Isa in the forearm and sends her flying down through the walkway above the mansion. Sayuri then says “Watch this now!” She takes a knife and jumps up from the middle walkway and slashes the walkway I’m on in HALF!!
I look at her seeing me fall down into the abyss of the mansion sending tons of concrete and materials with me and I think.. “Why the hell am I kind of turned on…” I realize as I fall and I start to accept my fate. Maybe I was too blind sighted by my fleshy desires to see the danger I put myself in… and then I feel all nice inside all of a sudden.. maybe it’s heaven? I open my eyes to find myself face to face with a cat girl surrounded by rubble Isa looks at me and says “You are in some deep shit dude.” How did you survive that..
“I am a cat.” She says blankly… and then drops me on the floor as she gets up- “OUCH!”I say as I grab my back.
“Stop acting like you are 12.” She turns and says as she puts her clawpaw back in her bag and starts to walk off.
I get up and start to run after her and say “Hey don’t leave me here!!”.