(Testing, testing, one two one two - is this working?)

I sigh irritably, the complex gravity manipulation construct I'd been working on dissipating as my concentration was broken. 

Would you leave me alone?

(Nope. You said you'd give me tips, this is how we're going to discuss them.)

You know, Lola has to learn spells and likely all sorts of history that I'm going to enjoy greatly. You could just leave me alone for now.

(Ha! That's funny. Anyway, you should pull up your status board - I implemented the fixes you suggested.)

Fine. Status.

Codex: Lvl 3

Health: 66/66

Mana: 34/34

Endurance: 48

Agility: 2

Strength: 0

Intelligence: 75

Charm: 0

Spells: Fireball (3), Ice Shot (1), Fire Breath (1), Freeze Floor (1), Acid Stream (1), Mana Manipulation (2), Audithesia (3), Phrase Vision (2), Erase Aura (1), Mana Laser (2), Warp (2)

Mutations: Magic Eye (1)

Perks: Knowledge is Power, Bibliophile (1)

Titles: Spell Progenitor

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I narrow my eye in obvious annoyance. Why is my charm zero?

(Look, I don't give out the stats directly. That's all you.)

Well, make it higher. You've already shown you can give spells and titles. Just do it again.

He isn't saying anything. 

What are you waiting for? My status isn't going to improve itself.

(I... can't do that anymore.)

WHAT.

(Okay, calm down! Seriously, it's not that big of a deal!)

That was one of the main reasons I accepted your deal to start with! 

(Look, the rules were changed, all right? Stuff I used to do I can't do anymore. Like the whole rewind-time thing? I've tried that like six times already and it hasn't worked either!)

...Someone reduced your abilities dramatically. But why? And how? To say nothing of who, of course. I'm not biased against any questions.

(I don't know, I don't know, and probably the guy who's higher up than me. I mean, I got pulled here from an alternate universe. Maybe the guy pulling the strings here is a multiverse or something.)

I returned to the construct, temporarily ignoring the universe. Do whatever you want. If you can't do anything for me, then you're worse than useless, you're annoying.

I can practically feel his pouting.

(Why are you so mean?)

I'm not being mean, I'm being honest. As it currently stands, I am in a comfortable situation. You need my help, but can't provide any help of your own. Clearly, you're capable of manipulating the system, but not nearly enough to actually assist in any way. I live with Lola, who is both intelligent and powerful, and can easily fuel any spells I can think of without an issue. As you've already given me the Spell Progenitor title, I can create spells for all of time, each one increasing in power. Lola wants to be a Magelord, whatever that is? Then I'm going to get her to become a Magelord. Pardon my language, but I don't give a flying crap about what you do.

(What if I told you stuff?)

What do you mean by that?

(Well, I'm the universe, right? I can see everything happening everywhere. I could just tell you about all the plots and plans going on behind the scenes! For example-"

His voice cuts off suddenly, and I'm left in blissful silence. Returning to my g-manipulation spell, I focus, carefully adding a critical thread of mana to stabilize the minor space-time distortions caused by the alterations in gravity fields.

(I'M BACK!)

The thread goes flying away, and the whole construct dissipates. 

I wish I could kill you.

(Well, that's harsh, but we've got much scarier things to talk about. Somehow, this guy is making it so I can't tell you anything important! At least I can still hold a casual conversation with you. I've been aching for someone to talk to!)

Never mind. I wish I could kill the imbecile who allowed you to talk to me in the first place.

(Ouch. At least we know for sure why your Charm is zero, though.)

...I'm thinking of starting a hit list.