After the prayer session had ended, numerous people lingered around the mourn the fallen, me included.

With a heavy heart, I paced around the newly raised tombstones,contemplating the cause and effects of this event.

I knelt down towards one of the graves, reading the hastily carved name on the wooden cross.

Kassie

 "I'm sorry, may you rest in peace." I whispered, saying these words just to comfort myself.

(SMACK)

Something smacked the back of my head, I lost balance and fell infront head first. Extending my hands to shield my face from the fall, both hands are dirtied as they pressed against the dirt on the ground.

Surprised, I look back, just to see an old lady behind me.

"You.. You are responsible of it! You killed Kassie, my dear child is dead!!"

Being clearly unstable, she sobs her way through the words.

"If you were actually working, she wouldn't die!!"

This lady has clearly lost it. Now she's just looking for outlets to vent her grief, hoping it will somehow relieve her violent feelings.

I regret these deaths, I mourn over it, their lives are very much my responsibility, but it isn't my fault that they lost their lives. However guilty I feel about it, it is not within my responsibility to apologise for it.

I calmly got up and turned around, staring the old lady in dead in her eyes, just to make my message clear.

"I greatly mourn the deaths of our brave defenders, but it is not my fault that they were perished in battle."

Stunned, she stares at me, unable to retort the facts that I've provided. I continued.

"Such is the nature of battle, when we step into that clusterfuck, we have to bear the risk of sacrificing our lives."

(SMACK)

A random shoe emerges out from the people that's surrounding me, and hits me in the chest.

"YOU KILLED OUR PEOPLE AND YET YOU DENY!"

A screech emerges out from an adult male, that squeezes past the crowd to just confront me.

"MY DEAR SON DIED! HE DIED BECAUSE OF YOU!!"

Literally screaming in my ears, the distance between us are so close that I could feel his intense breathing that's fueling his rage.

"Nyuhuhuhu...." Meanwhile, the old lady had stepped back and sat on the ground, wailing without restraint.

"I led them to confront the attackers, and defended the village."

"YOU-" Bursting in anger, he raised his arm.

I firmly grabbed his arm, and walk closer to meet him directly eye to eye.

"Against a dangerous foe, they stepped foward and fought.. and died, to protect you people. They died so we could live."

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The man avoided my eyes, hastily retracted his arm and stepped back. Among the crowd that was surrounding me, many threw glances of fright and anger towards me. Encircling me pace by pace, various objects are hurled towards me.

And the spiteful things they yelled. I am chosen as the outlet of their grief. As a survivor, moreover the captain that waltzed out of my home the next day, with no injuries in sight, that definitely roused them by a lot..

(SMACK SMACK)

"MURDERER!"

"Give back my son!"

"WHYYYYY?!"

"JUSTICE!"

(SMACK SMACK SMACK)

"MY HUSBAND!"

Ouch. Sticks, pebbles, handful of dirt, sandals and acorns even. What they lack in power, are made up with numbers. Various projectiles are slamming my body, resulting in jab-like pains all over myself.

But hey, at least none of it blinded me.

Gathering resolve, I puffed in some air while thinking of something to say.

"LISTEN."

"..." The surroundings became silent. Everyone stared at me while stopping their nonsense. Faint noises of sobbing and hushed breathing could be heard surrounding me.

Raising my arms above my shoulders, I widen my stance and spoke loudly.

"I tried my best, in my capacity to defend all of us. Hence, we succeded, but many were sacrificed in the process. I did all I can, all of us did. And this is the result we've acheived."

"The sacrifices are by no means unremarkable, but it is our efforts that repeled a certain slaughter that would otherwise befall onto us, which kept us alive."

"I suffered.. we suffered, and many of us sacrificed to save the rest of you. Yet I am placed under scrutiny for my actions for not forsaking my live and joining the casualties. What kind of justice is this?"

Ahh.. the sweet sound of silence. The entire crowded stayed frozen after my speech, must be hard being slammed by the truth.

They already know that I am not at fault, yet they ignore it just so that their emotional beliefs can be defended otherwise.

"WROOOONG!"

"BOO!!"

"NOOOOO~"

Various wails and screeches returned once again. Giving my tender eardrums yet another beating..

Ingorant peasants.. You lot believe in what you believe in, regardless of truth.. How does it feel to be so fucking stupid, that you cry your way out when the truth contradicts with your emotions?

"By God's name, stop this at once!" a firm voice emerged from somewhere out of the encirclement of peasants.

Ahh.. just what I needed!

"By assaulting the surviving defender, are you not spitting on the efforts of the sacrificed? Is it not desecration of the dead?" The priest exclaims swiftly.

"..."

Silence falls once again, the crowd dispersed swiftly without a word. Power of faith is really scary~

These peasants fear God while they detest truth. Why dwell in the intent of seeking logic while the will of God tells you what to do? :^)

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Without exchanging glances, the priest left the cemetery and returned to God knows where. Of course I understood his actions, he symphatises with my disposition and agrees with my reasoning. Also hinted me to return and keep to myself, until the moment of mourning resides.

Getting the message, I walked back towards my home without taking detours.

*

While walking..

"I.. I'm sorry captain." A timid voice whispered behind me.

Ahh.. as expected. It's understandable of Jarek not coming to my aid. Fear and guilt had plagued this man deeply.

"It's alright" I replied while looking at him.

"But.. I.. I didn't.." He replied frantically

"I understand, just go home." Spoken firmly and calmly, I turned away from him.

"I..I-"

Without listening, I kept walking. He stood his ground and didn't follow. Although, by judging my senses, Jarek remained and stared at me as I kept walking away.

*

Well, there's still much of the errands unfinished..

The fucking chief will be spewing more shit around, and Tilma.. and Andrzej..

I'll resolve the problems tomorrow, I had enough ordeals to swallow for today.

Yep!

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Returning to my shack, I locked myself in and grabbed some food to munch on.

Biting halfway into the rabbit jerky, I tasted.. DIRT!?

"PTOOEY" I spat out that chunk, feeling utterly disgusted.

Fuck! How many times have I tasted dirt since yesterday!?

I dumped the rest of the jerky into a conviniently dug hole, to store my food waste and buried afterwards. Gazing into nothing, I recalled something important that I've missed.

Hmm..

Oh.

Of course, I forgot to wash my hands...

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After all that mess is sorted out. The sun started setting..

"Now that I realised it, I was encircled by angry folks for quite some time.." Talking to myself, I am enlightened.

[Not the fact that this guy has slept for almost an entire day, waking up at around dusk, while mistaking it as dawn.]

Owh well..

The nighttime's here, I should just call it a day and sleep early..

Laying on my back, I gave up on recollecting the events happening today. It is too hazy and too overwhelming for me to even recall it. Better to leave it at that and give myself a much needed rest, yeh?

The battle.. The Rider.. The mess that it left..

All the fallen people, that was slaughtered by this.. thing.

I wish I could've did something.. anything.

*

*

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Needless to say, I did not get to have any sleep that night.

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