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Lester of Two Evils
Things With Too Many Legs

Things With Too Many Legs

Lester and his mother turned to see Mae standing just outside the still-open front door. She was wearing a skirt embroidered with tiny flying saucers and a shirt with the image of a smiling man in a red sweater above the words won’t you be my neighbor.

“And who might you be?” asked Mrs. North.

“Mom, this is Maeko Chase, from school,” said Lester, quickly joining Mae at the door.

“Oh?” Mrs. North looked the strange girl up and down. “Are you new?”

“No, ma’am. I’m fourteen,” Mae replied with just a hint of a southern accent.

“Excuse me?” said Mrs. North.

“She’s kidding,” Lester said with a nervous laugh. “Mae’s family moved to town over the summer.”

“Is that so? And this is your book Lester forgot at home?” asked Mrs. North, holding up the journal.

Lester considered giving Mae a nudge with his elbow to signal that she should play along, but he was afraid his mother would see. So instead, he had to content himself with crossing his fingers behind his back.

“Yes, it is,” Mae said, smiling and holding out her hand.

Mrs. North looked at the journal but did not immediately pass it over. “It seems pretty old.”

“I know, right?” Mae said with excitement. “I bought it from a cryptids site on the internet.”

“Cryptids?”

“It’s from the Greek, meaning to hide. Don’t you love words and their origins? Take your name, North, for example. Did you know it originated from the word ner, meaning left or below?”

Lester’s mother gave him a sideways glance. He could tell she wasn’t sure what to make of the direction this odd girl was taking their conversation. Lester moved to interrupt, but Mae was not to be deterred.

“Cryptids are creatures whose elusiveness causes foolish people to doubt their existence,” she continued. “You know, like Yetis, the Loch Ness Monster, or Bigfoot. What you’re holding is documented proof that those people are wrong. In fact, there’s a detailed drawing of a rare Mongolian Death Worm towards the back. It’s a bit gruesome, but I can find it for you if you’re interested?”

Mrs. North’s face went slightly pale. “No, thank you. That won’t be necessary, dear,” she said, passing the book to Mae. Then she wiped her hands on her pants as though slime from the death worm might have seeped out.

“Okay,” Mae said, sounding disappointed. “Maybe next time.”

Lester breathed a sigh of relief. From his mother’s expression, he could tell that she had already forgotten about the journal and was currently wondering what Mae meant by next time.

Lester and Mae helped gather the rest of the groceries, said goodbye to Mrs. North, and headed back to school.

As soon as they were out of sight, Lester excitedly unwound the journal’s leather strap. His enthusiasm was quickly dampened, however, as he flipped through the first few pages. Instead of the dark tome revealing the innermost secrets of The Council he had hoped, it appeared to be no more than a simple diary. Still determined that something useful should come from the risk he’d taken to obtain it, Lester labored through the barely legible handwriting to read the first few entries. Upon discovering nothing more compelling than dry descriptions of inclement weather, he gave up and handed the journal to Mae.

“So,” Lester asked, deflated, “what does your name mean?”

“What?” said Mae absentmindedly as they continued walking. She was studiously examining the journal, apparently having much less trouble deciphering the old penmanship than he had. Again, Lester marveled at her ability to find even the most mundane things related to Giles Hollow interesting.

“You were saying that North meant to the left and down. What does Maeko mean?”

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“Oh, that,” Mae said, her attention already back on her reading. “In Japanese, Maeko means truth child.”

The afternoon classes took Lester’s mind off of his disappointment, helped considerably by a difficult pop-quiz given by Mrs. Q. So much so that he nearly walked right past Amanda standing at the bottom of the school steps, his thoughts still on several questions he was sure he’d gotten wrong.

“Hey, there you are,” he said, stopping next to her. “I haven’t seen you since lunch.”

“Well, it’s not like I’ve been hiding,” Amanda said. She shot him an annoyed look, then went back to scanning the crowd of excited kids pouring out of the building.

The end of the school day was a joyful buzz of activity. Students who just moments before had slowly plodded to class were now full of energy as they ran towards waiting cars, large yellow buses, or along the path that led to the lower fields for athletic practice.

“I wanted to tell you what happened,” Lester said, carefully watching Amanda’s face as she stared at the front of the school. “A bunch of centipedes got loose from the science lab. You know the really big ones from South America that hiss?”

“Mmm-hmm,” Amanda said, distracted.

“Anyway, they’re recommending everyone tuck their pants into their socks. And it’s probably not a bad idea to check your bag before reaching inside. Just to be safe.”

“Wait. What?” Amanda asked, finally turning to look at him. “Centipedes? Really? How many do they think escaped?”

She quickly dropped her backpack to the ground and gave it a suspicious scowl. Then she began shaking out her pant legs and spinning around rapidly to try and get a look at her back.

“Is there one on me?” she practically screamed, combing her hands through her hair. “Lester! There’s one on me, isn’t there!”

Lester let her panic for a few seconds longer before smiling. “Relax,” he laughed. “Nothing’s escaped.”

“Then why would you say that? You know how I feel about things with — too — many — legs!” she glared, punctuating each word with a hard punch to Lester’s arm.

“Ow!” he cried, swinging his own bag around to ward off more blows. “I was trying to prove a point.”

“By making up gross bug stories? Very mature.”

Lester was about to say that based on what he’d seen of Bernard’s recent behavior, perhaps maturity was overrated when he was interrupted.

“Hello!” the new kid, Thomas, called, waving down at them from atop the busy stairs. As usual, he was impeccably dressed.

Lester didn’t think the animosity he felt towards Thomas was jealousy, but it was hard not to notice his flashy watch that cost more than Lester’s paper route made in a year. Then again, perhaps his dislike of Thomas stemmed from the expensive-looking black gloves he regularly wore that reminded Lester strongly of his father.

“What?” Amanda asked, out of the corner of her mouth, as she waved back to Thomas. “I told him I’d show him around. He’s new.” When Lester didn’t respond, she rolled her eyes. “See, this is why I didn’t tell you, because I knew you’d be weird about it.”

“I’m not being weird,” said Lester. “You can hang out with whoever you want.”

“Thank you.”

“I mean, the guy hates me for no reason, but whatever.”

“He doesn’t hate you,” Amanda said. “He doesn’t even know you.”

“That would explain why he can't get my name right no matter how many times I correct him.”

“Lester North, are you jealous?”

“Of Thomas?”

“Word is he’s quite a good student.”

“More like the teacher’s pet,” mumbled Lester.

“Now, where have I heard that before?” asked Amanda.

Lester cringed and felt his face get hot. Over the years, he’d been called many things for being smart and hard-working. It had always been Amanda who’d threatened the other kids and encouraged him to ignore them. If he was being honest, Lester was a bit envious of Thomas and how easily he’d ingratiated himself at their school. Every time Lester passed the new boy in the hall, he was surrounded by popular kids who seemed to hang on his every word. Thomas was smooth and charming with students and adults alike, in a way Lester felt he never could be.

“My apologies, Amanda,” Thomas said, strolling up to them. “Mrs. Q wanted a word after class. I hope we still have time for a tour of your little town.”

“Yes, of course,” Amanda said, her mood suddenly improving.

Lester cleared his throat.

“Oh. Hello, Leon,” Thomas said casually.

“Do you need to tell your parents before we go?” Amanda asked Thomas, ignoring Lester’s glare.

“I already did. That’s them driving off now.”

Lester followed Thomas’s gesture but could only see the sheriff department’s cruiser heading out to make its meals-on-wheels deliveries.

“Shall we?” Thomas gave a bow and an exaggerated wave of his hand.

“We shall,” giggled Amanda.

Lester watched them walk away. Thomas was gesticulating wildly at something Lester was sure wasn’t half as interesting as Amanda was pretending it to be. Maybe, Lester thought, there are some people you just can’t like, no matter how hard you try.