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1.39 - Disappointment

He Yu stood and took a single step towards the door. Movement was different now that he’d advanced. That one step contained more power than he could have mustered at a full sprint just hours before. Despite that, he had more control over his body than he’d ever known.

Stepping out of the cultivation chamber into the gray false dawn and the crisp morning air, he marveled at the change. The sounds of a just-stirring world contained more than he’d ever thought possible. The rustle of a mouse in the undergrowth, the near-silent rush of an owl returning to roost. The soft sigh of silk an arm’s length away.

He turned to where Zhang Lifen stood, hands folded into the sleeves of her gown, her cerulean eyes intent. He bowed, pressing his fist into his palm. “Forgive this one’s appearance, Senior Sister.”

“Congratulations on reaching Foundation, Junior Brother He. Inadequate as it is.”

He Yu froze at her words, panic spiking into his thoughts. He tried and failed to stammer out the only thing he could ask in response.

“Clean yourself up,” she said. “I’ll be waiting for you out front.” She turned and drifted off as though carried by the mountain’s mist.

He did as he’d been told. As he sloughed off the black sludge of impurities expelled through his skin, he tried to think of what else she could have meant. How could she deem him inadequate? He’d done it. He’d broken through to Foundation. With three months yet to go, he’d passed through the first real gate for remaining in the sect. More importantly, he could properly support his friends now.

Cleaned and changed, he stepped out through the outer gate to the home he shared with Li Heng. Zhang Lifen sat atop a nearby stone, beneath one of the red pines that dotted the residential area. As he approached, she stood and began walking down a path that led to one of the many secluded groves on this part of the mountain.

“Ask your question,” she said as he fell in behind her.

“What do you mean ‘inadequate?’ Did I not truly reach Foundation?”

“You did,” she said. “But you failed to do so under ideal conditions. While there is nothing strictly wrong with using elixirs to aid your advancement, you should not come to rely on them. I used a similar elixir when I achieved Foundation, after all.”

He Yu let out a heavy breath. He’d thought that he’d done something to damage his advancement. That his breakthrough had been incomplete, perhaps.

“No,” she continued, “you’ve not failed to break through.” She stopped in the path and turned. “You weren’t yet ready. The elixir brought you to the boundary, and the elixir is what pushed you past it.”

“But you said—”

“I know what I said. Do you? True, many use similar elixirs to fuel their advancement. Sha Xiang, for example. I suspect your encounter with her yesterday was the reason you chose to advance in such a manner.”

“Then why shouldn’t I do the same?” he demanded.

“Will you become a false dragon, relying on medicine to fuel your advancement? You’ll certainly rise quickly if you do. You may even reach Body Refining at a younger age than I did. However, you would do well to remember that the path becomes more difficult the further you travel. Elixirs alone will never bring you to the heights of cultivation, and allow you to challenge all of heaven and earth.

“There is more to ascending the realms of cultivation than simply increasing your cultivation base. If there wasn’t, nobody would ever get stuck at a bottleneck. Did you ever consider that there might be a reason most cultivators never progress beyond Body Refining? Should you truly wish to achieve the greatest heights, it would be best to put thoughts of easy advancement behind you.”

He Yu fell silent. Zhang Lifen had effectively brought him to the sect and then left him to his own devices. The only aid she’d given him had been informing him that he could get a copy of a cultivation technique available to all outer disciples anyway. How could she expect that without guidance, he’d muddle his way somewhere?

For a moment, neither of them spoke. At length, Zhang Lifen said, “I could have broken through without the elixir. Can you say the same?”

He thought back to the past few weeks, feeling as though he were approaching something, but he couldn’t honestly say he’d been close. “No,” he admitted, although he was certain she already knew the answer.

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“Just so,” she said, flicking her sleeve. “Let us put the past behind us. What’s done is done.”

“That’s it?” he asked, almost unable to believe how easily she’d dismissed the whole issue. “What’s done is done?”

“There is no changing it. You ought follow the example of someone like myself or Junior Sister Tan in the future, however. Approach the next realm and take half a step into it, then take your elixir. Try it when you advance stages within the Second Realm, then tell me I’m wrong if you can. Advancing to gain advantage over an enemy is common enough. If it was going to happen, it’s better that it happened early. Now, we have more pressing matters to discuss. You’ve come into possession of quite the interesting art, have you not?”

He Yu nodded. “The Cloud Emperor’s Heavenly Palace.”

“Master Cai does like to test me,” she said with a faint note of resignation. “I am familiar with the art, at least in passing, but my nature is unsuited to cultivate it. I will be of little help on your journey to master it. I daresay hardly anyone on the mountain will, aside from Master Cai himself.”

Of the two things He Yu wanted to say to that, he picked the one that seemed more pressing. “It isn’t as if you’ve been much help so far.” As soon as he’d spoken, he froze. Then, he bowed deeply in apology.

“You aren’t incorrect,” Zhang Lifen said. “There was little I could have done that you wouldn’t have been better served doing for yourself, and circumstances prevented me from taking a more active hand in your advancement during the grace period. The elders deem it best to allow the outer disciples to guide their own development during their time in the outer sect. Despite their restrictions, I likely could have provided more instruction and remained within the bounds of sect rules. Like instructing you to reach a bottleneck before stuffing yourself full of elixirs, for example.”

He hardly thought taking a single elixir counted as “stuffing.” Instead of objecting, he asked his other question, “What did you mean about Elder Cai and the Cloud Emperor’s Heavenly Palace?”

“Master Cai is the inheritor of the art. He learned it from its original creator, the Cloud Emperor himself.”

“Was he the one who sealed the—”

Zhang Lifen held up a silencing finger. “Let us not speak of things better left alone for now. But to answer your question, yes. And it was his hand that erased the records of such. I can assure you there are reasons, and those reasons are best left to mists of memory and time.”

He Yu fidgeted as he held back the torrent of questions that leaped to the tip of his tongue. If Elder Cai was the nameless cultivator who sealed the Dawn Palace, why would he want to erase all records of such? He recalled that Li Heng had seemed to know something of that, but it was probably best if he listened to Zhang Lifen for the time being. Instead, he asked, “When are you going to start actually training me?” His words were perhaps a bit more edged than he’d truly meant for them to carry, but he couldn’t say he regretted it.

“When you reach the inner sect, of course. As I said, I am prevented from taking too active a hand while you yet remain an outer disciple. Now that the grace has expired, I am permitted a bit more freedom in how I approach your development, however. First, you should immediately begin cultivating the White Mountain Body Art. Sect Brother Ren’s training has prepared you well for it, and it will complement your other arts besides. The Cloud Emperor’s Heavenly Palace contains a cultivation technique. You should begin cultivating that while continuing to increase your mastery with the Five Crescent Winds.

“Now that you’ve reached Foundation, your weekly stipend will increase as well, to help offset the increased costs of your advancement. It will, however, not be enough on its own. You’ll need to continue taking sect jobs, and you should probably begin venturing out into the surrounding sect territory to collect resources to either sell or use for yourself. As you advance, the costs will only increase. Without a family’s backing, you’ll be on your own paying for them.”

“That doesn’t sound like much guidance to me,” he said, letting his shoulders slump.

For the first time since she’d appeared in his courtyard, her too-knowing grin returned. “When you reach the inner sect, you’ll long for the days of my restraint, while cursing my name with every breath.”

“When I reach the inner sect,” he said.

“Of course. Your position is far stronger than you realize, He Yu. You have powerful allies, and Junior Brother Li’s plan for duels will gain you a bounty of resources. My own master’s intervention aside, it seems my hunch about you has proved itself correct.”

There was something about the way she’d spoken that prickled at him. He couldn’t place what exactly, and he thought it was probably better to stay quiet anyway. Whether his silence was more to a better understanding of how he fit into things at the Shrouded Peaks Sect, or due to the increased self-mastery from his cultivation, he couldn’t say and didn’t think mattered. It was an improvement either way.

“This humble disciple is grateful for any instruction Senior Sister Zhang can provide,” he said, pressing his fist into his palm.

Zhang Lifen rapped the back of her knuckles on the top of his head. “Stop that. No need to be so formal when it’s just us.”

The strike was too much like Elder Cai’s. He Yu wondered how long it had taken the elder to break Zhang Lifen of her own sense of propriety. “My apologies,” he said.

“No need,” she replied. “I’m prohibited from doing anything as instructive as dropping you in a den of spirit wolves every time you forget, so take advantage while you can, I suppose.” He Yu’s eyes widened a bit at that, but she didn’t give him time to respond. “Li Heng is looking for you. No doubt he wants to spread his wings now that the grace period has ended. Make sure you get yourself a storage treasure soon. You’ll need it, I think.”

She dismissed him with a wave, and He Yu rushed back home to meet with Li Heng.