Hundreds upon hundreds of pine trees and no way of knowing one from the other.
We wandered around losing track of where we’d been, with our only company being a large albino wood pigeon that had been following after us and resting in the branches above.
We stopped and admired its beauty for a moment.
“I tell you what, if I had a rifle and a skillet I’d cook one of those pigeons up.” Maverick stated, scratching at his arm.
I double took, “Why on earth would you do that?”
“Because apparently they taste delicious.” Maverick explained, watching the pigeon's red eyes.
“They’re endangered. That thing right there is a phenomenon.” I debated, looking at the albino wood pigeon’s beauty.
“Ahh, that’s all shit. I see them around all the time. Not a chance.” Maverick replied, picking up a rock.
I grabbed the rock out of Mavericks hands and threw it deep into the woods, “Not an albino one you don’t. I don’t think anyone has, now chill out.”
The albino pidgeon flew off and Maverick pulled a face, “I don’t know if you’ve noticed but we’re stuck in the middle of the fuckin’ woods, we could starve out here.”
“We aren’t going to starve out here. We just need to find a fence.” I replied, looking around the repeated pine maze.
“All I can say is lightning strikes.” Maverick argued, pushing through the pine tree branches.
I followed after him, “What does that mean?”
Maverick picked up a large stick from the ground“Lightning Strikes? It means that random shit happens sometimes, you can’t predict the future, all you can do is prepare for it, ya dig?”
I squinted, “Isn’t that Murphy’s law?”
“Nah. Murphy’s law is; what can, will. Completely different set of frogs.” Maverick finished, using his stick to knock pine branches out of the way.
“Sounds pretty similar to me.” I replied, as a branch smacked me in the face.
“Found it.” Maverick cheered, revealing an old rusty fence behind a branch.
“What’d I tell you!” I blurted, rushing to the fence and looking both lengthways.
“I reckon we go downhill.” advised Maverick, beginning on his way.
I stayed put,“If we go uphill we might be able to see which direction we should be heading.”
“Oh yeah?” mocked Maverick leaning on a barbed wire fence. “Fuck me!” he wailed.
“Shit! you alright?” I asked, grabbing a hold of his arm.
“Yeah, just one of the barbs.” Maverick explained, pulling his arm away.
I watched as blood began to drip from the puncture, “Well, you’re lucky there’s blood leaking.” I replied.
“Why’s that?” Maverick asked, moving along down hill.
“Because the blood will wash away the rust. Did you not learn anything from all the years in the bush with Dad?” I asked, following after him.
“Nah, I was too busy getting banged around the head by the old man to remember.” Maverick cursed, leading the way down the hill along the fence.
“Shit man, way to kill the vibe.” I thought to myself.
I joined Maverick’s side, “I’m just saying man, not all the stuff Dad did was bad. He taught us a lot of handy survival stuff as well.” I continued.
Maverick remained silent.
I began to feel light drops of rain falling on my arms. I looked up at the sky and noticed that it had turned a dark grey.
“Thank god I’m not still tied to that tree.” I thought internally.
“We need to find shelter.” I suggested, looking at the clouds above.
Maverick threw his stick and dropped a knee. He then began to pick at the soil.
“What’d you find?” I asked, peering over his shoulder.
“Shh.” Maverick replied, squeezing the stems of some mushrooms.
I squinted “Are those?”
“Magic, I hope.” Maverick answered, resting them next to each other before waiting for the verdict.
I felt rain begin to pour down, “C’mon Mav, we’ve gotta move. It’s about to hiss down.”
“You can. I’m waiting on these.” he replied, his face inches from the soil.
“Alright man, you stay here and catch pneumonia, and in case you were wondering; I have no idea how to cure that.” I spat, walking further along the fence.
Maverick palmed all the mushrooms from their resting places and shoved them into his mouth before following after me.
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He joined my side and chewed viciously through the mushrooms.
I pressed my eyes shut, “Can you stop that?” I asked.
He swallowed them with difficulty and rubbed his stomach, “Sorry I should’ve asked if you wanted some.”
“You know I don’t fuck around with shrooms anymore.” I replied.
“Really? You used to be the shroom king.” Maverick laughed.
“Yeah, and you used to be pleasant to be around. Things change.” I replied.
“Don’t be like that, I’m still the same guy.” Maverick debated, kicking pine needles along the ground.
I bit my tongue.
“Alright then, have at it Hunter. Tell me what’s on your mind. I don’t care. Just tell me. I don’t care.” Maverick began.
“But you should.” I thought to myself, beginning to shiver in the cold.
“We all have our vices Hunter, you and Dad like to drink, mum liked to smoke, and I like gear. We all have our things we like. So don’t look down on me when I’m not affecting you.” Maverick continued, spitting on the ground.
“You can’t equate drinking to crack Maverick.” I replied.
“Why not? Oh, I know why. Because alcohol kills more people than crack does.” Maverick argued.
I palmed my face, “I don’t think that’s true Maverick.”
“It is. The only way crack kills is from staying up for too long and having a heart attack.” Maverick insisted.
“I’d class crack as the probable cause.” I laughed, noticing the mouth of a cave to one side. I began to walk towards it.
“Those are just the idiots that ruin it for the rest of us that stay up for weeks on end. If you wanna have a good time you smoke your stuff, eat some food, get some sleep. It’s not actually that worser of a drug.” Maverick ranted, following my steps.
I sat on a rock at the depths of the cave that were still visible to light. Maverick remained standing, but joined me.
We watched the rain plummet as it had when I had first arrived at his house.
Suddenly a rock moved behind us, followed by shuffling of feet.
“What is that? A Bear?” Maverick asked.
“Bears aren’t in this country you idiot.” I replied, rushing to a stand.
“Stop calling me that or I’m gonna fuck you up, lil bro!” Maverick said, his finger pointing at my soul.
My eyes locked towards the darkened depths of the cave. Rocks moving, steps taking, cold rain falling.
I took a step backwards, it sounded like the rain was getting worse.
From the depths of the cave I saw a blistered foot reveal itself into the light. Followed by the bearded face of a man who looked to know his way around a hunting rifle. “What’re you doing here?” he asked us, looking across to the falling rain behind us.
“We’re lost, someone took us here, we're trying to get back home.” I began, my mouth wide but the man’s eyes wider.
His yellow teeth blinding me he said, “You’re a long way from there.” With a breath so putrid it made my nostrils burn. “What’s with the potato bag clothing, kid?” he asked me, frowning at my getup.
“What are you doing here?” Maverick asked, as if doing his grocery shopping.
“That’s a long story.” The bearded maniac began stepping into the light fully and revealing that he was wearing only dungaree overalls and brandishing a double barrel shotgun, “I said to old mate that If I saw anyone trying to steal his crops I’d deal to them.”
My arms raised in the air, Mavericks remained stiff, I said the first thing that “We’re just lost! We don’t know anything about any crops! We just got here man! Just let us leave!”
“You puff bro?” Maverick asked the bearded maniac as he scratched the back of his head.
“Puff?” The bearded maniac asked, his finger itching his trigger, but not pointed at us.
Maverick cleared his throat, “White.”
The bearded maniac frowned, “What’s it to ya?”
“I got a shit tonne of it stashed away at my house. If you show us the way out I’ll give you half.” Maverick replied, kicking a rock deep into the depths of the cave.
“How much you got?” The bearded maniac asked, placing his shotgun over his shoulders.
“How long is a piece of string?” Maverick replied, sniffling his nose.
The bearded maniac's eyes grew, “Where is it?”
“You’ve awoken the dragon now.” I thought to myself.
“I’ll tell you that after you get us there.” Maverick replied.
The bearded maniac frowned, “Tell me!” he bursted, aiming the barrel at Maverick.
Maverick froze and threw his hands up.
We stood there for a moment Maverick and I. The only sound was that of the pouring rain as the gale turned to hail. I began to do a Hail Mary in my mind and pray for forgiveness.
Suddenly a rock fell from the roof of the cave and the bearded maniac spun around to inspect.
Maverick reached for a rock and threw it at the bearded maniac's hand. No doubtedly shattering a ‘handful of bones’
“Aaaaargh you bastard!” the bearded maniac cursed, dropping his gun.
Maverick ran for the gun, but the maniac jumped on top of it and cradled it for dear life.
Maverick wrestled with the maniac for the gun. When the maniac's finger slipped the trigger and blasted a loud shot through the cave.
Maverick grabbed the gun and pointed it at the bearded maniac's head.
The bearded maniac began to pant and wheeze and perhaps say a prayer of his own. Until Maverick pulled the trigger and no rounds came out.
That’s when it hit me that it was a double barrel shotgun. Two shells, one time, each reload. The round had already been used and thus was empty.
The maniac dropped his bare heel Into Maverick’s groin.
Maverick toppled over and cradled himself as the maniac climbed to his feet and grabbed the gun.
The bearded maniac swung the butt of the gun at Mavericks head but Maverick gripped and stopped the impact with bare palms.
This began a wrestling match of who can outmuscle who for rights to the fire arm. Maverick on the ground, the bearded maniac standing tall.
Maverick used his legs to tangle the ankles of the bearded maniac and wedge him to a fall.
The bearded maniac fell with the gun, landed awkwardly, but still managed to quickly dog inside his dungaree pockets in search of his last remaining shells.
Maverick gripped the bearded Maniacs fingers tightly with his own and began to vice grip break them and collect the shells for his own.
Maverick then hurried to his feet, loaded the shells as he backed up and pointed the barrel square at the bearded maniac while he was gaining his feet.
The bearded maniac froze, clenched his jaw, but slowly began to reach for something.
Maverick jolted the barrel of his new shotgun towards the bearded maniac, “I’ll blow your head off old man!”
The bearded maniac nodded, “Okay, okay.” he agreed, standing tall once more.
Maverick looked over the bearded maniac’s shoulder into the darkness of the cave. “What’s back there?”
“Back there?” the bearded maniac repeated, looking over his shoulder.
“Are you deaf?” Maverick gritted, tightening his grip on his shotgun.
“You want me to show you?” the bearded maniac clammered.
“No shit, brainbox!” Maverick slurred.
“Alright, I’ll show you.” the bearded maniac agreed, reaching for something in the darkness once more.
Maverick kept the barrel aimed at his head as the bearded maniac produced a flashlight and shone it into the cave. Revealing a nest of grow tents in session.
“How much is in there?” Maverick asked.
The bearded maniac began to swallow his tongue, “You don’t wanna be taking it they’re—“
“How much?” Maverick repeated harshly.
“80 plants.” the bearded yet not so manic man responded.
“80 plants? That’s gotta be over a hundred pounds there!” Maverick cheered. “Load us up.” he finished.
“How are we gonna get all of that out of here Maverick?” I asked.
“He’ll find us a way.” Maverick grinned, “You can be sure he’ll find us a way.”
“Do you boys know where you are?” the bearded man asked.
“Fuck knows, pine city?” joked Maverick.
“You’re in the naughty north. Long way from home for you two boys.” grinned the bearded man.
“What makes you say that?” Maverick laughed, holding his shotgun straight.
“That hoodie you’re wearing, JG Roofing? Auckland wide I see.” the bearded man laughed.
“This isn’t even my hoodie!” Maverick cursed, shoving the barrel towards the bearded man.
“Oh yeah?” the bearded man mocked, “Is it his?” the man laughed.
Maverick felt rage and smacked the butt of his gun against the bearded man’s face, dropping the bearded man onto the cave's floor and the flashlight with him.
Maverick picked up the flashlight and shon it into the cave, revealing a set of dirt bikes.
Maverick cleared his throat, “Come on Hunter, let’s get crackin!”