T.a.o. told me a story once about when she lived with Razor. It was, in some ways, the story of your making, Sagan. The making of your line. I’ve never realized that connection before, and it chills me to think on it now. Your ancestor didn’t tell me the name of the father, but I always suspected Razor. Now, I want to hear it from him. And I’m sorry, but this will be dangerous.

[SS]: We ask Xelan to join us and monitor the situation, but I think it’s really to comfort me without Korac saying so. Like before with Zero, Korac is sitting, relaxed, on the edge of the bed nearest me. His eyes are closed, and he’s concentrating on his breathing. Xelan stands guard beside him.

White eyes open with twin crescent pupils.

Shutting them out, I close my own and take a breath. When I open them again, Razor is smirking at me.

“Sagan,” Xelan says gently.

I ignore my old mentor and continue to stare at the man who assaulted me and put my lover through so much abuse—

This time, Xelan was firm. “Sagan.”

Gazing up at him, I find a mirror in his hands. My eyes… they’re solid black with a purple pupil. When I meet Xelan’s sad smile, I understand. I need to calm myself for this to continue. To allow Korac to work with his new ability, and to prevent Razor’s amusement at my immediate discomfort.

The monster’s eyes are shining with it.

Seamswalker, I apologize for the distress I cause you. Once more, I want to reiterate; I wish you were anyone but my brother’s intended. Otherwise, we might have known a friendship similar to the one Korac asks me now to exploit.

[SS]: Razor is lifting one of Korac’s hands to his eyes. I thought at first to test his mobility or to marvel at the foreign sensation. But no. He is gazing at his brother’s manicured fingernails. It makes me shiver. That makes him smile. At my frown, it fades.

Nice ensemble. Were you wearing that when he summoned Zero?

[SS]: I refuse to answer.

You should know that it was customary for our father to sleep with my brothers’ wives at least once. An honor bestowed to few. They believed fortune graced Karter to know him in that way without the competition.

[SS]: He’s searching my eyes, and when I don’t give him what he wants, he sighs.

Time to begin.

Discussing this violates T.a.o.’s privacy. I hesitate. Even to clear my name. I know what Korac thinks I did, and he’s wrong. I can’t have you thinking the absolute worst of me, Seamswalker. Xelan.

So, please. Keep this information to yourselves and confine it to this room.

{300 CE}

Matches weren’t the only form of gambling in the Obsidian Palace. The polished rock cavern housed an entire casino and a few brothels with varying specialties. It was my very favorite place until I installed the Divine Booths at the Emporium. On any given night, you’d find me dealing cards or spinning the Lamia wheel. As always, I catered to my patrons and their vices.

And what illustrious patrons I served. Reipon’s most prominent historians, including our mutual acquaintance, Iuo. The Silk Barons of Lukemore. Atmospheric engineers from Lacceirus-Capra. Pil Governors dressed in mesh suits of platinum threads. Every Queen of Monarch 3 and their Butterfly Courts.

No one from Yu. They’re such terribly boring people—

What’s wrong, Seamswalker?

[SS]: I only spare him a frown.

Xelan shifts slightly where he’s leaned back against a nearby wall. Ankles and arms crossed like a tough bodyguard.

Razor’s eyes in Korac’s face sparkle with satisfied mischief.

I provided you with dossiers for all these contacts. Haven’t you read them yet? Can you not open the drive?

Maybe you should try on Enki.

[SS]: Xelan switches his ankles and prompts, “Let’s stay on topic for now. The better you do with this session, the more likely Korac will try again.”

I almost wince at that. I’m not sure if Korac would appreciate Xelan making negotiations on his behalf with Razor, of all people.

But the Pain Curator agrees to the tentative prize and continues.

From all over the Vast Collective, they came to the Palace for a good time.

Even the Primaries.

[SS]: My eyebrows jump up, and Xelan narrows his gaze at Razor.

Remorse attended. Often with Bol. I’ll confess to never having laid eyes on Lon and Xhi. Not even during the war. I’ve convinced myself they don’t exist. Like a smokescreen to hide the Tritan’s vulnerability.

Bol was stiff and spent hardly any money. Always in search of “the Mother,” that one.

But Remorse and his entourage lavished the tables with their attention and bad luck. Except we have a game similar to your poker. Those expressionless faces of theirs make them damned hard to play with—

[SS]: This is so hard to explain, but something is rippling in Razor’s eyes.

Now, he’s frowning.

Xelan reminds the other man, “Stay on topic. Ingratiate yourself to your host. Stop drawing her in with your story and tell us what happened to T.a.o.”

I… I hate admitting this, but I was on the edge of my seat. To take notes only, I swear. Razor can provide us with so much information to take down the Tritans and Imminent.

But time and place.

I scoot back and further away from the man inside my lover’s body.

Razor’s smirking with Korac’s mouth.

There’s nothing wrong with being a captive audience, Seamswalker. It’s quite endearing. But, of course, I digress.

The only member of their escort that I detest, then and now, was Abresson. And before you ask, because I can see the question shimmering in your eyes, Seamswalker—He did not already possess the scars. And yes, I know their origin. I’m sure you’re dying to know.

[SS]: I’m still not speaking to him.

Instead, Xelan nods. “We’re all curious. The more information you provide marks you further in our favor.”

Elden knows I trust that Icarus with everything in me, but it’s making me so uncomfortable that he’s bartering with Korac’s body. It’s all about maintaining the upper-hand, surely.

Surely.

Razor’s smile makes me hesitate as he continues.

Abresson threw his weight around and tried to bully my employees. Remorse contained him for me, but the Primary could only do so much. The first time the scarred Tritan touched one of the Caprent servers after she expressly asked him to leave her alone, we frosted him out.

No blood sports.

No games.

No sex.

No point in being there, really.

But still he came and spectated where permitted. I asked Remorse one night, and the Tritan god explained, “Abresson believes there is an opportunity to restore faith in his self-discipline.”

Despite my doubts, his behavior improved over several decades. Eventually, I allowed him to place bets at the matches.

As my brother told you, T.a.o. cleaned up these events. Quite the spectacle. The customers gasped and stared at her in wonder. Beautiful, talented, and sweet.

T.a.o. is—was—one of the few people I’d call a friend.

After she traced me from the Seam, I—

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Fuck.

What can I say? She was too innocent to corrupt, even for this vice vendor. I kept so much from her to protect what we shared. She never knew of my ties with Celindria. That I benefited from the memory tech the First Progeny derived from Devis. That all of Imminent worked to break Andrius for his suggestion abilities.

T.a.o. never knew, and she never suspected me. So we lived in the innocence of this. The woman’s apartments were in the Palace. She felt safe with me.

I refused to lose that by confessing the truth. Never.

Yet even with all my influence, I couldn’t keep her completely safe.

[SS]: I hate him for looking so genuinely devastated. For trying to manipulate me even now. I have no idea how much he’s affecting Xelan, who suddenly developed a truly convincing disinterested facade.

How long will we live before we have to school our faces the way they do, Rayne?

When she wasn’t in the ring, T.a.o. moved about freely throughout the Palace. She kept her belongings and food safe at my table. After each cleansing, she’d Seamswalk into the owner’s box, where I doted on her to no end. It never made Triss jealous. She understood.

A little sister was no threat to my deadly lover.

It was on his second night back that I noticed Abresson following T.a.o. around the owner’s box with his black voids. You’ve seen the way she dresses. It’s whimsical and Fae-ish. Almost childlike.

He watched her. And I watched him.

I didn’t like it. I think Remorse suspected because Abresson’s leering stopped after a few months.

But…

Korac appeared and the sudden increase in demand that came with him kept me ringside to monitor the bookies. Absent, gone, unavailable.

I wasn’t there.

The night she left her water glass without my supervision. Her stumbling back to her room on the second floor, completely unaware of the scum in her shadow.

When she missed a cleansing, I hauled up the stairs and saw both she and Abresson were gone.

I fucking knew.

I also knew he miscalculated, and that it would cost her greatly. What do you know of Tritan mating habits, dear Seamswalker?

[SS]: I answer before really thinking about it, “I know Remorse drugs women before raping them.”

Xelan kinda winces, and I feel bad for saying it.

That’s right. Have you guessed why?

[SS]: Hating myself for being drawn in, I reply, “Is it not to hide their identities?”

Razor shakes Korac’s head.

It’s why I could hear T.a.o. screaming from the first floor. It’s why, when I busted down the door, I couldn’t simply wrench him off her.

Barbed.

Midway to climax, their physiology releases a barb. They have no control over this, and only their women were compatible. So Remorse believes he’s paying his women a kindness with the dram. To anesthetize his lovers. But T.a.o. woke too soon. And you know why, don’t you, Seamswalker?

[SS]: I swallow and nod. Seamswalkers metabolize faster than regular humanoid beings. I don’t need to answer aloud.

Xelan did. “She woke up to that?! Do you know… Elden, no… she was so pure—”

Exactly that pure. I’d never known T.a.o. to engage another, and she shied away from those interested in her. This… this was her only experience, as far as I know, and I couldn’t remove Abresson from her without severely traumatizing her further.

[SS]: I have to look away. I feel sick.

Xelan looks equally nauseated.

I slammed the door shut behind me. No need to draw attention to this horrifying moment T.a.o. endured. With the deepest voice my true rage could muster, I warned him, “Extract. Now. You are not finishing this.”

From where Abresson pinned her to the bed, he startled at my voice. Immediately, he tried to placate me. “Razor—stop moving, girl—I would if I could. But she waited until it was too late to withdraw consent—”

Forgetting myself and the risk to T.a.o., I cracked him hard enough across his jaw to almost kill him. He twisted off the bed and fell unconscious.

T.a.o. screamed in pain, and I hissed at myself. “Aw, fuck me. T.a.o., forgive me. Does it feel… is it safe to remove you from him?”

This was a nightmare.

It got worse as she jerked her head back and forth, breathing too fast from the agony.

“I know this sounds awful to say, but breathe for me. Relax if you can—”

Hurriedly, she defended herself. “Never. Never asked permission. Hours now. He’s been done many times. I can feel it.”

Motherfucking reprobate.

But in T.a.o.’s presence, I only pushed my hand through my hair, frustrated. It made me think to do the same for her hair, as coated in sweat as it was. I wanted to knock Abresson awake so I could knock him out again. A few hundred times. “Breathe.”

Abresson’s black blood coated T.a.o. where she marred him with defensive wounds. She fought all the while. And left him scarred.

“This hurts more than black fire.”

I closed my eyes and hung my head. It was a mistake to make her touch Cascading Light. How could I predict her reactions to it? That said, why would I think she’d react well—

[SS]: Xelan crosses the room in two quick strides, putting his face in Korac/Razor’s. “You did what?”

But Razor seems unafraid, completely aware he inhabits a body my mentor wouldn’t want to damage.

Or better not…

I exposed her to Cascading Light and drove her further into madness, but that wasn’t my intention. I wanted to expand her understanding of the universe. To make her Imminent. Instead, I further condemned her.

[SS]: I tug on Xelan’s shirt, and he turns to look at me. With a smile, I assure him, “Trust me, Wingmaster. If anyone would ever kill Razor again, it’ll be me, but certainly not in my man’s body. If you don’t mind, please take a step back.”

For Razor’s smug smirk, I glower.

The smile fades, and he tilts his head as if considering me.

After that night with Abresson, I realized why I should never have a friend as innocent as T.a.o. and yourself. All this vice—How was I supposed to protect her or you?

After her comment about Cascading Light, Abresson—there’s no tasteful way to say this—slid from her and off the bed with a painful cry from her. On the floor, the Tritan groaned and shook his head.

I turned to T.a.o. and softly instructed, “Go to the bathroom and see to your injuries. I will take care of Abresson—”

Stop.

Look at her.

My brain would let me do nothing else.

Her black waves were knotted and matted all over. Spray patterns of black blood splattered face and chest. The soft pink dress she wore was shredded from her sleeve to her skirt, exposing her. Her nacre was slow to heal her blackening eyes and busted lip. Or the wounds were so significant that it required more time.

I wanted to kill Abresson.

“Please, T.a.o. I will check on you in a moment.”

When she walked stiltedly and in shock toward the ensuite, I turned all my rage and malice on the Tritan who cowed with lidless wide eyes. He trembled. And I needed more. More for the suffering Abresson inflicted on her, but also for shattering any illusions I had for befriending one such as her.

“Please—please, Razor. If you kill me, Remorse will retaliate.”

I didn’t believe him. Not Remorse and I.

In a smaller voice more befitting his insignificance, Abresson confessed, “I only wanted someone pure.”

With so much restraint, I beat him. Punches to the face, gut, ribs, kidneys. A kick under the chin. Boxed his ears. To death was only enough.

I underestimated so much in this scenario. My scrutiny. Abresson’s depravity. Tritan entitlement.

But more than all those factors, I underestimated T.a.o.’s goodness.

I don’t know if it was the thirtieth or the three-hundredth punch, but she Seamswalked over and grabbed my arm to stop me from hitting him again. I knew when I looked up at her that I exhibited more of my Aegis nature than I intended, but she took it in stride.

Gently, she squeezed my bicep before tears spilled from her eyes.

Understand me. She did not cry while Abresson assaulted her. Not until she got between us.

In her tears, she begged for his life, “Not over me. Never over me.”

I know my eyes widened twice their size. I couldn’t fathom her, and at first, I swore I misunderstood. But then she literally put herself between me and Abresson’s pulped face.

“Please, Razor.”

I…

Still, I can’t believe it.

Shaking, I dropped Abresson’s carcass on the floor and backed away. She immediately moved away from both of us. Angry and a little dissatisfied with losing a kill, I growled, “Get up, you waste of life. Get up, and get the fuck out. Know that she is the only reason you are still breathing. If I ever even hear of you taking someone against their will again, not even T.a.o. could save you.”

Abresson crawled in black bloody ruin to the door.

I called after him, “Not even half my strength, Abresson. Do you understand? I can kill you with a flick of my finger.” I snapped my fingers. “You would simply explode in a wash of gore, but I enjoy beating you. So I advise you to never return. Lest I get the urge again—”

T.a.o. touched my shoulder gently.

I had to close my eyes to stop the blood lust. She deserved better, and Abresson deserved to die.

But there was more to contend with.

I turned and examined her wounds with a light touch. “Are you all right? Worry not. I will prepare you a room at the Emporium. You may find it more to your liking—”

“I go.”

No. “Please.” Begging isn’t really in my nature, but for her, I tried. “It will never happen again, and you need care. Please, I want you to stay. You are my only friend.”

“What I want matters first now.”

T.a.o. brushed my face with Tritan flesh under her fingernails, and I knew I’d lost before she spoke. “I want to see Korac.”

Of course. Korac.

[SS]: I don’t feel sorry for Razor. I don’t. I can’t. I wanted to once. Some part of me pities him, but he didn’t just burn those bridges. He napalmed them and salted the Emporium with their ashes.

Xelan, however, is wearing that mask, and I wonder what he’s concealing.

I learned later that T.a.o. conceived that awful night and kept the child. That Korac helped her with the pregnancy, but I knew she delivered alone in the Seam. I heard her lonesome screams in my bones. Not long after, Celindria hunted her down.

Or I’d suspected so. I did search for T.a.o. and Celindria. But without proof that the First Progeny survived Thailea, how could I challenge her? Had I only known sooner—But there was no way for me to enter the nacre chamber where she kept her siblings for experiments.

I’ve seen Celindria inside T.a.o. I… No.

That’s enough revelations for one night.

Now that I’ve contributed to my brother’s memoirs, I ask for a favor in return.

[SS]: Xelan is pinching the bridge of his nose before diving right in, “What?”

Triss… is she—

Seamswalker, did you let her live?

[SS]: I’m happy to inform him, “She lives. Mostly, she sleeps.”

Sadness fills Razor’s eyes inside Korac’s face.

Ahem. May I see her?

[SS]: I don’t hesitate. “No.”

Razor looks to Xelan, who shakes his head firmly. “We promised Korac that we would keep you here, but I’ll vouch for you another time.”

Very well. Hold tightly to those you love while you still can.

I’ll see you through his eyes shortly, Seamswalker. I enjoy lingering behind them when your body is flushed, your back is arched, and your lips are parted—

[SS]: Korac is squeezing his eyes shut on a growl. I smile for his return. So that he sees the Pain Curator left no mark on me. When he opens his eyes again, gray flecks and a solid pupil meet my gaze. Sorrow has left his eyes shiny.

Razor feels something for you, Sagan, that defies description. Beyond ownership or entitlement. In his mind, he’s already won you. I won’t ever upcycle him in your presence again.

Xelan, I owe you a favor for this.

[SS]: The Prince of Cinder stares for a few heartbeats at Korac before assuring, “Consider it repaid. I learned how T.a.o. created her line. Horrific as it was, it puts me in a better position to reason with her when the time comes. Understand her better.”

Korac and I share a glance. We’re all very concerned about whether we can convince T.a.o. to ever return to the Shadow, but I hope so.

Before Xelan leaves, he calls over his shoulder at the door. “Korac?”

Yes?

[SS]: The other man sighs as if it’s a topic he doesn’t want to broach. “Consider letting Razor see Triss. It may lift her spirits which could help her survive the pregnancy.”

I frown. Not because I hate the idea, but because I also agree with it. When Korac looks at me, I nod.

We’ll consider it.

[SS]: Again, with that pause before Xelan confesses, “I must admit, I am interested in reading your Verse.”

Wait in line with the rest of the galaxy.

[SS]: Xelan actually chuckles as he leaves.

Maybe this method of writing out their lives could really reunite them. Well, except Nox.

Come, Sagan. And I mean that literally. We exceeded the milestone, and I want to erase these horrors with the sounds of your pleasure.