"Bang,Bang, Bang!"
Jed cocked the hammer back on his scoped big iron. The intended fleeing target driving the tractor had gotten lucky. One of his deputies had jumped aboard taking two bullets that hit as the third narrowly missed. The shadow in the cabin was pierced by moonlight creeping through the bullet holes. Jed squeezed the trigger again, frowning seeing his first bullet sprayed open a shoulder blade without seeing any blood. Time was running out to get a shot in before they would escape. The snow was keeping their enemies slow, but three different evil factions surrounded them.
“Bang.Bang.”
He double tapped the downed enemy and used [Speed Reloader] to reloadx6 in one motion. Using a simple device to reload sapped energy for some strange reason? A veteran like him it ought to be effortless. He tried to quickly shoot but his trigger finger had [Grown] too big to fit into the revolver's trigger guard.
“Dang nabbit this class sucks ass in unexpected ways,” complained Jed, fighting against both his weapon and the [Grower] class he had spent his remaining money on.
He had chosen this Knights armor from the mysterious shopkeeper. While nothing came with warning it's been well established that too a human using too much crystal magic power will shorten one's life. He tried switching stance to left handed but his legs had turned to a solid tree trunk of flesh. He holstered his weapon to bend to try and dig himself out.
“What the duck? I can't move, I'm mutant rooted” He shouted, having a panic attack.
Bessie was shaking from an adrenaline dump. The smoke filled air in the shooting gallery became impossible to see without dead eyes. Suddenly her nerves bolted as muscle memory snapped into the suit's system gear. The scared farmer’s daughter instantly became a super soldier. She activated her gloves [sleight of hand] skill reloading 4 bullets with one.
“Bang, Bang, Bang, Bang.”
The duel full moons illuminated a tunnel through the foul gunsmoke building in the shooting gallery. Jed gave up on running and had two revolvers gunning on rails. The two unleashed everything they had sprayed down the fleeing tractor and the first zombies slowly waltzing too close.
“Jed keep shooting using your [Anchorman] ability with that super steady shot %33 accuracy increase!” She hollered, patting him on the back.
“I want a touch of somebody else’s class instead of this dumb shit,” grunted Jed, fed up with the changes he kept intentionally triggering on his body. "But anyhow do you know what's up?"
"Our armors are mental and the little blue circle full of text on our chests spells it out," she explained, tapping the glass piece on his chest.
Jed tried looking at his watch and noticed the combo bar at the bottom was milliseconds from being out.
"Bang,Bang,[Boomstickx6!]"
The revolver exploded like a shotgun. The aftermath left a wide opening of cleared zombies.
[Bang, bang, bang, reloadx23]
The abundance of easily dispatched ordinary dead kept the combos going allowing more and more firepower to shower the land. The bullets drained from their bandoleers feeding the blaze.
“Boom!”
The tractor blew up while the couple continued shooting to overkill.
Nate Spit dove through the flames out of the cabin after taking a second bullet in the shoulder. The glass broke all around him on the ground while he dragged himself into the ditch following the blood trail of another. He heard rebel yells of a crazed female shooter shrieking for more bullets in the hills. The fallen knight began twitching in the road as the horde moved in.
“Sigh it’s gonna take all damn night to finish this unfortunate business and find a sinkhole,” said Jed, slowly reloading.
“We gotta get back to the car and start moving,” she said, catching a handful of thrown bullets.
Meanwhile Nancy the necromancer’s hundreds of zombies groaned slowly moving throughout the apocalyptic cornfield. Her army at this point was mostly zombie farmers and townsfolk harvested from various graveyards without special abilities. Her necromancy journey this entire adventure had sucked even with having [Elven plotting armor] on the entire time she was still kinda weak powered this late in the plot. She had tried to rush the growth of mutants and the demon scarecrow and open more portals in order to find the sandman but had run out of time.
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Finding the god of time and offering the corpse of the one who killed you before your time was the only known way to turn it back and change fate. You were granted whatever remained in your hourglass before being cut down short changed. She hoped like hell to be sent back to the club. Capital city 7 years ago when the Death Drag Piercers cut their first record and victim. The early touring days long before the tables turned and she was destroyed like the rest of the harem.
It greatly troubled Nancy that even if she got a second chance by going back in time she would have to escape Edward all over again. She had to also break the mental spell cast by him in the short time before he could fully mastermind her into his complete mental control. Failing to change fate would create a time slip allusion dooming her to keep getting groomed, murdered and arriving here on this filthy farm dead skeleton again and again.
Perhaps it was better to give up on fighting in a man’s world opting to instead loitering around in purgatory on the astral trains bar for eternity. Her inner rage fed her zombies causing them to start sprinting. First she would destroy everything living until the flat planet was a 100 percent apocalypse.
“Shit she’s pissed,” stammered Bessie.
“We need to retreat, but shit I’m rooted in place,” Jed, trying to bounce his heavy beanbag for feet. His shoes were finally slowly beginning to shrink but the horde was swarming to them fast.
Bessie was trembling in control of her wits again instead of the lucky fool's clothing that seemed to have a magic mind of its own. She helped Jed walk along this time as he blasted with his free hand.
“CRACK!”
The sky split apart as worlds briefly collided.
“Hehehehehe,” announced the arrival of the wicked zombie witch Isabella.
She was riding on a broomstick surrounded by her flying monkeys through a portal. The ground shook like an earthquake as her circus was coming to town on the ground. A hundred zombie elephants dragged the packed up dungeon carnival core through the snowy wasteland. Looking like ants swarming around the convoy the special zombies introduced themselves. A horde of jugglers, clowns, fire breathers, knife throwers, and acrobats waltzing around two wooly mammoths booming hooves. A giant thundered along playing the single bass string with its giant thumb keeping time with the stomps loosely attached on its massive bone club with sinew. The drums beat the shit out a single massive skin stretched with blood on a sled pulled by roaring polar bears littered in zombie crystal shards pulsing at full force magic energy.
Bessie keeled over breathing heavily in and out to calm herself having a panic attack.
“Do you need a hand?” asked Jed, with as much worry in his eyes as possible for an outlaw killer.
She smiled back in the same gloomy demeanor, haunted eyes glazed by reality hitting in.
“Let’s get to the car, the distraction might give us enough of a break if we run,” said Bessie, jumping off a rock.
“Bang,bang bang bang.”
“Fuck no time this is our last stand dear at least the revenge is done with and they will go with us,” Jed cried, covering her behind.
“I’m sorry to drag you into this,” said Bessie, reloading the level action rifle in one motion.
“I know my family had my funeral long ago and move on..Not their fault with me being officially KIA,” he replied, while she helped him climb this time.
“No tears, let's use these super powered armors for all they are worth.”
“BANG,BANG, BANG BANG.”
“HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWL!”
A howling wolf was pissed the fuck off enough to stand the hairs on all but the most decomposed in fear for 100 acres. Nate Spit like a demon as his body began to transform in the ditch. The deputy was following suit on the road. Their lawful uniforms tearing away at the seams. The golden badge flashed in the full moons as the sheriff's howled naked in [RAGE MODE!]. Nate was a full turned werewolf and ate the harmless metal star for tomorrow's breakfast. Tonight It was time to ruthlessly tear apart criminals.
It looked like it was the end of the line for our anti heroes. Jed blew the dome off an attacking clown moments before it bit his ass. There looked to be an endless swarm of enemies surrounding them on all sides and his partner was already out of ammo. He only had the ones in the chambers and not an ounce of silver even if they could run back to the vehicle.
Jed heard Bessie resort to spitting on enemies behind him. He turned to throw expecting the worst. They had been shooting the easy rounds of zombies and now the sprinting hordes had boxed them in. Jed went to throw her the un-scoped gun. He made a face of utter disgust seeing her taking a leak in the corner. Why risk death with your pants down.
"Bang."
The bullet turned a charging skeleton's femur to dust. He turned back to spot the lucky green liquid activated sponge directly below her squat. It had already grown into a thick jungle bush. Bessie jumped out of the way just in time to avoid the sprouting tree shaking out the magic material.
Jed looked the other way to hide his smirk before throwing her his revolver.
“Cover me, I'm gonna grow a jungle to protect us,” he said, unzipping his fly and activating his magic member’s [Dirty Growth $tream] ability.
They jogged through the quickly thickening green pulp rapidly eating away the snow. Vines entangled the asteroids and entangled zombies like snakes while trees sprouted rapidly camouflaging impact zones.
“That’s some super powered fertilizer thanks,” she said, hugging him. “We need to hide from the werewolves unless silver starts growing on trees,”
They broke apart to dash out of the blinding moonlight and into tall wild grass rapidly thickening.
“That distraction must be glitched if it hasn’t gone off.”
“Shh.”
“HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWL!”