When they got to his house, Kiri led her inside then turned and asked lightly, "Dinner, a bath, or me?"

Hikaru laughed and answered, "All three, in that order?"

Kiri looked at her in surprise and said, "Hikaru, I was joking, I'm not planning to do anything to you tonight. It would be taking advantage."

Hikaru looked back at him and said steadily, "But I think we should do that, we should eat, then I should take a bath and you should scrub my back, and then, we'll see?"

Kiri bit his lip and nodded.

Hikaru set her things down by the table.

Kiri beckoned her into the bathroom and asked, "What temperature?" As he started the tub filling.

Hikaru looked blank and he laughed and set it on the default, which was a little cooler than he liked. He showed her the controls. Then said, "It will shut itself off when it's full." He went into the kitchen and started pulling things out.

Hikaru watched for a moment and then asked, "Is there anything I can help with?"

Kiri grinned at her and said, "Sure, come stand here."

She came over to him, he turned away from her and drew her arms around his waist. Then he began chopping vegetables.

Hikaru hugged him and rested her chin on his shoulder. "I don't think this is helping," she said.

"It's greatly improving the morale of the cook," he replied cheerfully. They stood like that for awhile as he started the cooking. "Being held by a beautiful woman in my kitchen makes me feel very happy," he said lightly while he stirred the sauteing vegetables.

Hikaru shifted uncomfortably and said, "People easily mistake me for a boy, I'm not that beautiful."

Kiri stiffened and replied, "I don't understand how anyone ever takes you for a boy Hikaru. You are gorgeous."

He turned to her, she looked back dubiously. He put his arms around her waist and kissed her. She returned his kiss and clung to him. He backed her up against the wall beside the little hallway and pressed into her as he kissed her jaw and her cheek and her throat. She shivered as he slid his hands up under her shirt and unfastened her bra. He cupped her breast in his hand and kissed her more deeply.

When he started to lift her shirt she put her hand over his and said, "Kiri."

He stopped. He turned away, still breathing heavily. "Sorry."

"Kiri," she said.

"I think we should skip the back scrubbing," he said.

"No," she said stubbornly.

"Hikaru," he said, "I am so close to losing control and I meant what I said about not wanting to take advantage of you tonight."

Hikaru wrapped her arms back around his waist and set her chin on his shoulder. "There's a reason," she told him quietly. "I want you to scrub my back, OK?"

He nodded.

"How can I persuade you that you are freaking gorgeous?" he asked.

Her breath huffed against his ear, "I believe you, or at least, I believe you really think so Kiri. I think you're biased though."

He laughed shakily and said, "I love you, and I think I've burned our dinner."

He stepped forward and rescued the vegetables. Hikaru looked them over and said, "It's not too bad, not like if I were cooking.

He laughed.

"I'm serious," she said. "I can bake OK, but I hate trying to cook anything that you can't start and then leave alone."

Kiri grinned at her and said, "It's fine, I like cooking, I'll always cook for you."

Hikaru blushed.

--

They sat cuddled together as they ate the slightly singed food. "It's good," Hikaru told him. He gave her a wry look. "I mean it," she said. Your food is as good as Kao-ji-chan's food, and he's a chef."

"Your mom's food is pretty good too," he replied.

"My brother's too," she said. "I'm the only one who doesn't enjoy cooking."

He hugged her.

"I don't mind doing dishes though?" she suggested.

"OK," he replied. Then added, "But there's a dishwasher under the counter, so it's not much trouble."

Hikaru laughed.

--

She looked at him uncertainly as she entered the bathroom. "Will you wait until I say I'm ready?" she asked.

He nodded. "Do you want bubbles?" he asked with a grin.

She shook her head and said, "Not this time."

He waited outside the door while Hikaru climbed into the tub and knelt in the center, then called out, "OK."

Kiri came in and started washing her back. When he finished he traced some of her scars with his fingers and asked quietly, "Do you want me to wash your hair?"

Hikaru looked up at him with a startled expression. "OK?" she replied uncertainly.

He washed her hair, and she melted. He laughed and hugged her. "Don't stay in too long, the water won't get cold," he said quietly into her ear. He kissed the edge of her ear and left.

Outside the bathroom he turned to face the door, slid down the wall, and cried.

--

When Hikaru came out, dried and dressed in her pajamas, he was still sitting there, and she stopped, startled.

He looked up at her and asked a little angrily, "Did you think I would care? Do you think I'm that shallow?"

Hikaru looked at him unhappily. "No," she replied.

"Then why?" he asked. He clambered to his feet and stood in front of her.

"Because the ones that hurt aren't the ones that say things like 'you're ugly' or 'I bet you did that to yourself to get attention', it's the ones that don't want to care but can't help being afraid or disgusted anyway." She gulped and looked at his set face and added, "And I didn't want you to see for the first time, while we were, when we were in the middle..."

Stolen content alert: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.

He hugged her to him and buried his face in her hair.

"Hikaru I love you, and you're beautiful," he said.

She hugged him back.

He drew her back into the living room and down into his lap. They cuddled for awhile. After a bit, he drew a deep breath and asked, "Does this mean I can take your shirt off now?"

Hikaru laughed and nodded.

He kissed her. He pulled her pajama shirt off and traced his fingers along her scars. "They're so smooth, I never felt them," he commented.

"They're old, and they were mostly from glass, so they healed cleanly," she said.

He pushed her back so she was laying on the floor and bent and ran his mouth along one of the longer scars. Hikaru shivered.

"They're mostly on the left side?" he asked quietly.

"My father was on my right, he grabbed me as the car hit," Hikaru said shakily.

Kiri stopped caressing her and just held her.

Hikaru told him how her father had died. How they'd climbed into the taxi that had started pulling out before they were buckled in, how a car had slammed into them from a cross street, throwing Hikaru and her father through the left side window.

How he'd crawled to her and held her and made her promise that she'd live. How she'd woken up in the hospital and everyone but her brother had refused to tell her anything. Yuki had told her. Her mother had only cried until the doctors wouldn't let her visit anymore. Her father had died at the scene, massive internal injuries, he'd been on the impact side and sheltered her from the worst. But she'd still almost died of blood loss.

She told him of the weeks she'd spent in the hospital. How she'd barely talked because it seemed to take all her energy just to breathe. How Risa had visited her and cried. And then talked her parents into allowing her to keep visiting, bringing her school work, going over each day's lessons even though they were only in grade school.

"Risa is the reason I didn't get held back a year," she explained.

Kiri wordlessly caressed her and cuddled her against him where they lay on the floor.

"Risa says it looks like I survived a fight with a dragon, and I should be proud," Hikaru added. "But even though I know I shouldn't let it matter, I hate showing my scars."

Kiri kissed her and laughed and ran his fingers along a scar to the cluster of marks beside her left breast. "More like lightning, I think, like you took a Pikachu to the heart."

Hikaru laughed and Kiri leaned over and kissed the the spot. Then he dropped more kisses along the slight rise of her breast, and took her nipple in his mouth and sucked. When she felt the warmth of his mouth, Hikaru gasped and and her fingers bit into his shoulder. He released her and moved to the other one. She gave a little moan as his tongue moved. He stopped and wriggled back up to kiss her mouth. Then he pulled back and caressed her face.

"Hikaru, I.." he began.

Hikaru looked at him.

He sat up and said, "We have to stop here." He was shaking.

"Why?" she asked, confused.

"Because, I don't want to do it like this, I don't want to take advantage of this stressful day, and I don't want to do you and then leave you," he said shakily.

"What?" Hikaru asked.

Kiri looked at her. "I'm sorry," he said. "It was wrong of me, but I didn't want to tell you and make you put this off." He touched the ear she'd just had pierced.

Hikaru looked at him with confusion. "Kiri?" she asked.

He ran his hands through his hair and handed her her pajama shirt. "I found out this morning, I'm going to China for a week or ten days. I leave Tuesday morning." He didn't look at her.

She sat up and pulled her pajama shirt on and hugged him. She leaned her cheek against his shoulder and asked, "Why all of a sudden?"

"Seiko broke an arm in a stupid drunken weekend stunt, and I have to go in her place," he said.

Hikaru hugged him tightly and asked, "Why does that mean we have to stop, I don't want to stop?"

Kiri laughed shakily and asked, "Will you have sex with me after I get back?"

Hikaru hesitated and then nodded.

Kiri pulled out of her arms and turned to her. He looked her in the eyes, his eyes bright and intense, and said, "I'm really serious about you, I love you, even though we've only been dating for such a short time." He cupped her jaw in one hand.

She looked back at him.

"I want it to be amazing, so that you never want to have anyone but me," he said quietly. "So I don't want to rush anymore, if you'd been willing the other day, I'd have just done you then," he admitted. "But I want more now."

Hikaru blushed and cuddled up to him. "I still don't understand why that means we have to stop now," she said.

He hugged her tightly, "Because I'll be gone almost as long as we've been together. And I'll be hoping the entire time that you don't change your mind," he whispered.

She kissed him. "I won't change my mind."

He kissed her. "Then we'll do it when I get back," he said quietly.

She sighed.

He cuddled her.

Hikaru said sadly, "I suppose I should finish my homework then."

Kiri laughed and kissed her nose. "Yes," he agreed, "and I have more work to finish too. When you're done, you can have my bed."

"I can sleep on the couch," she protested.

"I don't know how long I'll be up, and I have it on good authority that the office light is annoying to visitors," he replied with a grin.

"You could sleep with me?" Hikaru suggested boldly.

He stuck out his tongue at her and replied, "I wouldn't sleep, it would be torture."

He stroked his fingers through her hair when she sighed.

"I love you," he said.

"Kiri," she said.

He waited a minute then leaned in and kissed her.

She laughed. She kissed him again, then sighed and got out her homework.

When she finished he showed her how to wash her ear. Even though the solution was supposed to numb a little, it hurt so much she cried. He cuddled her a little, then led her to the bedroom, sat and tucked her into his bed and then stood. She grabbed his hand. "Hikaru," he said.

"Can you stay for a few minutes?" she asked.

He nodded and lay down beside her on top of the covers. She wriggled close. He wrapped around her and petted her through the blankets. "Do you want me to stay until you fall asleep?" he asked.

Hikaru said, "I don't want to make you stay up even later." They lay there for a minute and she added, "Besides, I'll never be able to sleep with you petting me like this."

He stopped his hands and hugged her instead. "If I just hold you like this?" he asked quietly.

She nodded. She fell asleep surprisingly quickly.

"Hikaru," Kiri said. He kissed her. She opened her eyes and looked at him. "Good morning sweetheart," he said. "I let you sleep as long as I could."

Hikaru got up reluctantly, then held her hand to her mouth and said sleepily, "I didn't bring a toothbrush."

Kiri smiled at her, he looked tired but was already dressed in his neat business clothes. "I think I've got an extra."

"Did you sleep at all?" she asked.

He nodded. "I grabbed a few hours."

He found her a new toothbrush. "Just leave it with mine," he said with a grin.

Hikaru looked at him thoughtfully.

"What?" he asked.

"How many women have lived with you?" she asked hesitantly.

He gave her a wry look and said, "None here."

She raised an eyebrow at him while brushing her teeth.

He grimaced at her. "Remember when I said I'd become conceited about dating?"

She nodded.

He looked away. "I'd also decided not to bring a woman home with me again until we'd been dating for over three months, or let one move in before half a year," he said a little ruefully.

She raised her eyebrows at him.

He kissed her cheek, reminded her to wash her ear, and went into the kitchen.

She cried again when she washed her ear. Then she dressed in her school uniform and carried her duffle out with her.

Kiri handed her an egg on a piece of toast, and picked up a briefcase. "Ready?" he asked.

Hikaru nodded, took her phone off the counter, pulled her duffle strap over her shoulder, bit the toast and picked up her school bag.

When they stepped out the door Kiri's neighbor, an elderly woman looked at them in surprise. "Good morning?" she greeted them cheerfully but curiously.

Hikaru swallowed the last bite quickly and replied shyly, "Good morning."

Kiri nodded. "Good morning Geda-san," he replied. "Do you think you could get my extra key since you're here, and I'll get another made to give you later?"

She nodded and disappeared into her house for a moment. She returned quickly and handed Kiri the key.

Kiri turned to Hikaru and gave it to her. She gave him an uncertain look as she accepted it.

Kiri said, "You can come anytime, whether I'm here or not."

Hikaru said, "OK."

They walked to Kiri's car. His neighbor called after them, "Kiri-bo-chan take good care of that little girl."

Kiri laughed and called back, "I intend to."

They climbed into the car, fastened themselves in, and then Kiri drove to Hikaru's school. He leaned over and gave her a quick kiss before she got out. "I'll miss you like crazy," he told her.

"Can't I see you tonight?" she asked.

He shook his head. "I'll be crazy busy, trying to get ready and make sure the rest of the team is ready and that I know everything I need to before we leave."

She kissed him again and said, "I'll miss you too," as she got out.