Maps :
Incomplete map by an apprentice cartographer of Callir :
[https://img15.hostingpics.net/pics/551293mapkingmakercharted.jpg]
Characters :
The list is incomplete and simple, I haven't listed every named character, and I may add more information about each of them. They're grouped according to their affiliation when they're first introduced. To avoid big spoilers, I won't take out the deceased characters, and I don't think I'll update their whereabouts and affiliations.
City-state of Callir
* Rina, the Blood, chosen of Xito (appears in ch1)
* Phiramel, high-priest of Xito (appears in ch4)
* Therenus, elder (appears in ch7)
* Viriane, sibyl (appears in ch7)
* Julia, priestess of Xito (appears in ch4)
* Lord Laurentias Feanir (appears in ch10)
* Sir Leon Feanir, Laurentias' elder son, captain of the bloodsguard (appears in ch5)
* Timenon Feanir, Laurentias' youngest son and heir (mentioned in ch9, appears in ch10)
* Lord Elric Danalion (appears in ch9)
* Sir Petrus Danalion, Elric's nephew, knight of the bloodsguard (appears in ch17)
* Astrael, brother of the chosen, squire to Leon Feanir (appears in ch1)
* Joel, the chosen's father (appears in ch1)
* Rosa, the chosen's mother (appears in ch1)
* Horace, apothecary (mentionned in ch1, appears in ch2)
* Bert, mercenary in service of the Feanir family (appears in ch8)
* Odel, Vieran swordsman in service of Therenus (appears in ch11)
* Gerald and Carius, mercenaries in service of Phiramel (appear in ch20)
Kingdom of Dael
* King Arvus Agelien, ruler of Dael (mentioned in ch13 and 30)
* Crown prince Arthian Agelien, the king's elder son and heir (appears in ch13)
* Duke Reydar Agelien, the king's youngest son (appears in ch13)
* Duke Darius Neraldes, lord of the Moonlit Castle (appears in ch13)
* Princess Noctine Neraldes (mentioned in ch30)
Support the creativity of authors by visiting Royal Road for this novel and more.
* Princess Agelle Agelien, elder daughter of Arthian (mentioned in ch21)
* Princess Ezveril Agelien, younger daughter of Arthian (appears in ch13)
* Lady Hilne Neraldes, Ezveril's sworn knight (appears in ch13)
City-states of Viera
* Gavnel, the Warmth, chosen of Viera (mentioned in ch13 and 32)
* Lady Atricia, regent of Ocia (appears in ch21)
* Lord Vierodel, her son (appears in ch21)
* Lord Saerge Segheon, Daeli ambassador in Ocia (appears in ch21)
* Flavo, captain of the citywatch of Ocia (appears in ch30)
* Demnir, Callirian merchant in Akilne (appears in ch22)
* Nelvel and Vieric, his slaves (appear in ch22 and 25)
* Samaar, sailor and explorer (mentioned in ch25, appears in ch27)
Kingdom of Paar
* Jehon, royal envoy (appears in ch24)
* Zeron, mercenary (appears in ch25)
* * *
This part is where I'll make a list of the edits I've done/ been planning to do. I had very relevant feedback regarding the lack of foreshadowing and a lot of other issues, but I don't want to risk a rewrite and get tired of it, so I'll just edit in some much needed changes/scenes.
I'll list here said changes, you're free to check the concerned chapters but in case you don't want to, I'll write a quick summary of the important things that matter for plot and character developement.
If you happen to find some glaring plotholes and any sort of inconsistency, or displays of poor story-telling, you can inform me and comment on the concerned page or here if you want.
Obviously, these are probably spoilers if you haven't read to the lastest chapter.
General :
-> The lords' names : Laurentias Feanir and Elric Danalion
-> Edited out the entire creature/Abyss sub-plot (see below for details)
-> Changed Ezveril's age (+3 years)
Chapter 3 : Added a new scene at the end. +Minor change in the middle.
-> Introduced the mithridatism (poison resistance) at the end of the chapter. Hinting at Horace's dubious decision to help Astrael and teach him about poisons. I mention four types of plant-based poisons, which Astrael has been feeding to his sister and himself ever since they were six y-o.
-> Added foreshadowing of the improved crossbow as a potential political tool.
Chapter 4 : Minor changes at the end of the chapter.
-> Hinted at the oddness of Rina's blood, and how it has to do with Xito.
Chapter 5 : A few edits in the middle and at the end.
-> Hinted at Julia and Leon's relationship, and at Rina's blood (she has been blessed by Xito with a certain type of magic)
Chapter 6 : Minor change in the middle.
-> Changed Astrael's financial situation and preparations. He isn't penniless anymore, his parents gave him some money, but he needs more and has several plans to solve his financial issues.
Chapter 8 : Added a new scene after the visit at the apothecary shop.
-> Astrael looks for specific poisons that could be used by lords and rich patrons, and learns that venom-based poison is expensive but very deadly. He and Bert return to the temple via another route, and get separated in the red-light district. Some trouble with drunk thugs gets quickly solved by Bert who also witness Astrael knocking out an attacker.
Chapter 9 & 10 : I did a major rewrite. Only kept a few scenes, changed the first half and end of chapter 9, and changed most things in chapter 10.
-> I changed Astrael's plan, he learns about Leon's sick brother beforehand and aims for him directly. Rina is aware of the crossbow project and is somewhat an accomplice in getting Leon interested in funding it. Hinted at Therenus and lord Danalion's dealings with the Vieran cities, and how they try to control the citizens with gifts. Julia's role is kept a bit more mysterious, while I reveal a bit of lore about the world now and then, and background about the Feanir family. In the end, Astrael feigns ignorance about Timenon's illness but compels Leon to bring up the crossbow project during dinner.
Chapter 11 : A few changes, mainly about Julia herself.
-> Julia is revealed to be the one who first told Leon about Astrael's project, but asked him to keep it a secret. Astrael stills find out her relationship with Leon, but they seem to somehow find an agreement (he says he doesn't want Rina to be involved in some scandal because of Julia, so he doesn't intend to reveal anything). A short talk about slaves, and their respective opinions on the matter.
Chapter 12 : Changed the last scene into a normal hunt.
Chapter 14 : Changed bits of the first scene, Astrael is now looking into the past only because of his curiosity.
Chapter 17 : Extended the last scene + minor changes.
-> The knights come back with the evidence and Therenus is locked up in a room. Odel doesn't defend him, despite Therenus thinking about their friendship, and Phiramel call for a public trial.
Chapter 21 : Changed "second princess" to "third princess", mentionned princess Agelle, Ezveril's older sister
Chapter 25 : Changed the note at the beginning.
Chapter 30 : Noctine is now Ezveril's cousin, instead of half-sister
Planned :
-> I'll rewrite most descriptions and internal thoughts/feelings when I have the time/when I feel like it, because there is too much telling and not enough showing.
I'll probably add things on a regular basis, so don't forget to check this page from time to time in case I changed something relevant to the plot.