Chapter 20

Danny was a whirlwind when he finally made it to camp. After shouting the guide’s name, Aspen looked over the fox. The rags Indy was wrapped in were sticky with red. “There has to be something you can do,” Danny begged. “Please.” The look in Aspen’s eyes nearly sent Danny into a rage again. Cold detachment. A look that conveyed a core lesson of the Multiverse. People get hurt. People die. Get used to it, because it will happen again. Danny wondered how many friends Aspen had seen bleed out on a battlefield long forgotten outside of guilt-ridden nightmares. He wondered if all the powers and growth in the world would make it worth it.

Yes. He thought. Because I can save him. Danny pushed past Aspen. Just because he won’t do anything, doesn’t mean I can’t. With great care, Danny laid Indy on the floor of his tent. The Necklace of Rejuvenation had been Danny’s method of healing in the past, but that had been destroyed. It’s just Qi, right? If I can use my Qi to purify I must be able to use it to heal, I just don’t know how yet. To Danny’s panic-ridden mind, it seemed logical enough. The problem was, he didn’t know where to start. He tried to remember exactly what that healing energy felt like, but his mind and heart were racing too fast to focus. I think it was warm? Like standing out in the sun. But there is something more to it. The finer details escaped him.

There’s no time! Danny couldn’t exactly tell, but he imagined that, with each second, the chances of Indy recovering were falling dramatically. Deciding that he had to do something, Danny began to move his Qi. He covered the fox with his energy, hoping to stop the bleeding. If he could just hold on tight enough, maybe he could keep the fox from leaking anymore. There was middling success. Danny wondered if he could pinch the wounds together like a spiritual suture. Pained whining made him quickly abandon that idea. The last thing he wanted to do was put Indy through any more pain.

Readjusting his approach, Danny slowly tried to shift his Qi so that it felt like that healing necklace. Rushing would get him nowhere. The only thing he would get by hurrying is hurrying Indy to his death. That morbid thought scared him into finding his patience. He imagined the warmth of the healing magic. It wasn’t a boil like purity, instead, it was a lukewarm bath, the kind you take after a long day to soothe your aching muscles. There was a vibrancy about it as well. Almost as if you were watching a time-lapse of a plant grow. The promise of new life. Trying to replicate that feeling felt out of reach. Still, Danny tried.

His Qi was colorless when he imagined it. Now, it took on a faint green glow. The green started at his Core and slowly changed all the energy surrounding the fox. Danny could have sworn he saw the wounds closing, but he only managed to sustain the ephemeral shroud for a moment. The Qi lost its color. The grip that Danny had employed to stop the blood loss dissipated. From his Core, Danny rallied more energy. Just a little more, he thought. But more didn’t come. Danny had run dry. Maybe I can…cultivate to…refill my… Danny’s thoughts became molasses, slowly dripping by. He half-fell half-sat down on the tent floor. Eyelids began to droop, and creeping black began to cloud his vision. Not… again… Danny’s head hit the ground with an unceremonious thump.

___________________________________________________________

The oversized grey hoodie wouldn’t fit in his neon green backpack. As it was, Danny had no idea if he would even be able to get the thing to zip up. Neon green wasn’t exactly conducive to successfully sneaking around past midnight, but it had been years since Danny had gotten a new backpack. They never had enough money. Got enough for Malboros and Bud Light, though. Just another reason on the laundry list for why Danny was running away tonight. He had it all planned out. Zeke already said Danny could crash with him. Z-dubs had graduated last year and lived on his own 20 minutes away. Danny would call him when he made it to the gas station a couple blocks down and Zeke would pick him up. Forcing the zipper shut and putting the tattered straps on his shoulders, Danny expertly avoided making the door creak when he opened it. There was only one thing that made Danny hesitate. And she was standing right in the doorway.

“Why’s your light on?” Isabella asked sleepily.

“Bella, go back to sleep. It’s nothing.” Danny coaxed his little sister.

“Where are you going?” She had noticed Danny’s backpack.

“I’m just— I’m going out for a bit, I’ll be right back.” By now, Bella was awake enough to know that wasn’t the truth.

“You can’t go.” Her voice grew louder. “I’ll tell—mmmm!” Danny cut her off by covering her mouth with his hand.

“Shh. Bella, please. I can’t stay here. He’s getting worse.” He whispered. She licked the palm of his hand which Danny in turn pulled back in disgust. “Eww, gross.” He wiped his hand on his pants.

Unauthorized duplication: this tale has been taken without consent. Report sightings.

“Let me go with you.” She was whispering now too.

“You know I can’t. I’m one thing, but they would tear this entire city apart looking for their little princess.” She hated that nickname. In hindsight, it was unwise to poke fun at a child when all she had to do was yell and his entire plan would be foiled, but Danny had never been the best at forward-thinking.

“Let me come or— or I’ll yell for Dad. Right now.” Ultimatum delivered, she stared at Danny with those big brown puppy-dog eyes. Danny would be lying if he said that the look didn’t make his stomach twist.

“I can’t. You’ll be fine, but I— I just can’t take it anymore.” Danny had worked his tail off at his fast food job, ever since he was old enough to work. He caught rides with his friends or co-workers until he was able to finally pass his license test. Then, he bought a clunker in cash, having Zeke register the car since he was the only one in their friend group who was 18 at the time. This plan had been underway for a while now, and Danny didn’t want to falter when he was so close to the finish line. “Please, Bella, just go back to your room.”

She regarded Danny for a long time. Finally, she said, “I hate you,” under her breath as she turned away. When the door clicked shut, Danny felt like he could breathe again. The pit in his stomach remained. She didn’t mean it, she’s just a kid. He told himself. This is hard for her too. But those last few moments repeated in his mind as he descended the stairs, stepping on the sides near the left wall to avoid unnecessary noise. Danny turned the knob to the front door before he opened and then closed it behind him the same way. He walked under the light of the streetlamps thinking about those three words. I hate you. Part of him wanted to run back, or call child services, or something, but the truth was— he was scared. Scared that the facade of a happy family would be impenetrable to whatever agent answered like a veneer hiding a rotted tooth. Scared of what would happen afterward. Scared of being put in foster care or a group home, the stories were horrific. Scared of not being much better than Rob when it came to raising a child. I hate me too.

___________________________________________________________

Danny was pretty sure he had headbutted an oncoming Greyhound bus with how badly his head was throbbing. I gotta stop doing that. His pain was quickly shoved to the back burner as he recalled last night’s events. “Indy?” Danny meant to shout, but he was only able to get out a hoarse call.

“Easy.” A familiar voice said. “The beast is resting native.” Danny tried to sit up to see where his guide was. All he could manage was to build up to his elbows. “You’re developing a dangerous habit. Never lose control so much as to cause you to overdraw your Qi.” Aspen lectured. “You would have achieved a more satisfactory result if you had regenerated your reserves and then attempted… whatever it is you did.” The last thing Danny needed at the moment was a schooling in moderation.

“Is Indy okay?”

The guide snorted. “Yes, native. The Earth creature will live. Whatever you did managed to bring it back from the brink, even if just barely.” Sure enough, Danny saw a little orange coil wrapped tightly in the corner. Indy’s coat still had flecks of dried blood in it. He looked like he had rolled around in a red paint that now dried in flakes. Danny was relieved to see that his breathing was much more steady than what he had last seen.

“What about Ash?” In his panicked haze, Danny had sent the Direwolf off to find the other two Pillars. He now realized that the pack they had faced might not have been the last of the monsters. Danny might have sent an injured Ash straight into the proverbial lion’s den— wolves’ den.

“The Magibeast returned with the Pillars. And something else.”

Danny wasn’t sure what Aspen meant by “Magibeast,” but he was too relieved about hearing she was okay to care. Struggling to a seated position, Danny crawled over to where Indy was lying. “I’m sorry,” he whispered so as not to wake the fox, “this was all my fault.”

“Native, tell me how your battle went.”

“You can’t tell?” Danny’s words dripped with venom. “Badly.”

“In detail.”

Danny recounted how the encounter with the Dreadwolves had gone: the ambush, the following melee, the Alpha slipping into his blindspot, Indy’s gruesome injury, and, finally, his rampage. Aspen just listened. When Danny had finished, the guide spoke. “When did you use the Bubble Ring?”

“The Bubble… I didn’t.”

“Why?”

“Because I forgot…” Danny couldn’t seem to pull his eyes away from the ground.

“You engaged an enemy of unknown strength and number without full knowledge of your abilities,” Danny flinched with every word, “and you didn’t use the tools at your disposal. Accurate?” Danny nodded. “You are right about one thing: this was your fault. If you weren’t punching down, all of you would have died. Because of you.” The guide let the admonishment hang in the air. Without another word, Aspen exited the tent to let Danny stew with his words.

He’s right, Danny thought, I was careless, and Indy paid the price. How can I be upset with Aspen withholding information if I don’t even know my own powers? If I had used my Bubble Ring, or made better use of the Cloak… If I had known how to enter wolf-mode from the get-go… His thoughts trailed on and on with what-ifs and could’ve-beens. Danny resolved himself to take his training even more seriously. What happened today was on him, no doubt about that, but at least no one had died. He would have to get Indy some extra monster meat as a get-well-soon gift. There was one other thing that was troubling Danny. Something he could not get out of his mind.

As he went over the fight in his head, he kept replaying when he wolfed out on the Dreadwolves. How it felt. How he enjoyed it… It had felt like he let out a part of him that had been caged away deep inside, a part that he sensed would not go quietly back into captivity. Down in his depths, Danny had this feeling that he had been afraid of for a long time. What if that rage isn’t from the ability? What if I’m not that different from Rob after all?