May 23, 2019 - 8:24 AM
Leo Kelly
A few hours after we arrived, the sun started to shine through the small cell windows. Davis had stuffed one of the blankets into his window and returned to his spot on his bed. I did the same with the other, turning the room dark again. It was surreal. I was struggling to stay awake, and yet it was practically broad daylight outside. It felt like I was on the wrong end of a graveyard shift. Or like I was waking up from a long night at the bar with the taste of the bar mat still on my tongue. I wanted to sleep so bad, but I had a job to do in case Davis went psycho. And combined with the worry, I didn’t think I possibly could.
My exhaustion was obvious. I was slouched half over and under the desk like a depressed snail. And I think the worst of it, was that I knew I was right. It was dumb to stay for another day when we had at least another three hours last night to get out of town. I was right yet, I still felt incredibly guilty because no matter how right or logical the decision was, it wasn’t the right decision.
The right one was the compassionate one, and lets just say, last night, I wasn’t operating with compassion in mind.
My duty on the other hand was an easier pill to swallow. There wasn’t much for me to see, or notice for that matter, but when I did notice something, anything, then I would be quick to act. I had a duty to Eury, and annoyingly, to Davis as well, no one deserves what this thing does to them.
I could feel myself nodding off, winks turning to sleepy blinks, like I was sitting through a lecture that was as boring as quiet.
I don’t know, should I get Alaska?
If anyone deserved a few hours of sleep it should be the Amazon. Compared to me, Alaska was definitely the better fighter. Still though, being awake during the day was killing me and it wasn’t like Davis was going anywhere.
What I hoped was only a few minutes later, I was awoken by a pair of sounds. Behind me, the door opened up, sending my heart racing as I quickly got to my feet and unsheathed Sheila. The second, was a distant howl that was filtering in through the windows.
Eury stood in the doorway, wrapped in a soft blanket, looking sheepish yet kind of stern. I shamefully took my hand off the sword. Eury’s expression was frozen on her face, until after a second her expression thawed into a smile, then a snicker.
“Sorry to wake you.”
“No!” I said, forgetting my indoor voice. Adrenaline was still thick in my blood. “I mean, nah. I wasn’t sleeping.”
“Sure.” Eury grabbed a folded chair leaning against the wall.
“Can’t sleep?” I asked.
“Yeah, something like that.” Eury said, staring straight at the cells. “Looks like you’re having the opposite problem. huh?”
“I… guess.” And just like that the conversation was dead in the water. My tired eyes were now firmly open, as I desperately tried to look not desperate.
“Do you think he’s infected?”
“I dunno. I thought that was more your realm of expertise.”
“Sure, like I’m some sort of expert on this.” Eury leaned back in her chair but kept her eyes focused solely on the dark cells. “Guess I would be, I suppose. I am the one who might be sick too.” She nonchalantly said like she had a hangnail or something. She didn’t seem overly concerned if Davis heard her.
“That’s not what I’m implying.” I said, making a point of being quieter, “you’re the science nerd supreme, I’m the idiot packmule. I didn’t want to take over your schtick.”
“Thanks for your concern over my schtick.”
I let the room get silent. It wasn’t that I had nothing to say. Far from it. I had so much to say, but there were so many ways to say it wrong. So I settled for one. “I don’t think either of you are sick.”
“Oh yeah?” Eury snapped a glare my way like a desk lamp in interrogations. “Is that why you just so happen to have antivirals on you?”
“Well, I think you're sick, but I don’t think you're sick, sick. You should still get some though.”
“Well I’ll have to wait until Davis is awake to get that bottle back.”
“Yeah, well if you weren’t being so dramatic back there,” I said, grabbing the concentrator’s bag from the ground beside me, “I wouldn’t need to break out the backup bottle I grabbed.”
“Nicely done, parasite,” she took the bottle I offered. “Now, these won’t get rid of you, will it?” She said with a small smile.
I shrugged. “Not unless you want them to, I guess.”
Her eyes narrowed at me, but she fumbled the cap off. Then she proceeded to force a pill into the back of her mouth followed by an audible swallow.
“First, try not to take my jokes so seriously.” She said, before repeating the disgusting process with the second. “Secondly, why would I actually want you gone?”
I sidestepped her difficult question, with a more pressing matter. “You do know we still have water, right?”
She shook her head. “I can’t swallow pills with water.” I was impressed that she managed to say that with a straight face.
“What? You’re not serious are you?”
“Yes, yes, it’s sooo weird. Good work! You noticed aberration #135 of the Eury-praxis. Anyways, why are you suddenly acting like I want you to hit the road?”
It felt like a trick question that I had absolutely no way of knowing the right answer to, so I just went with the closest thing to the truth. “...Because you told me to?”
Eury rubbed her eyes for a second before looking at me. “Look, I’m sorry. Things were getting heated last night, and…” She hesitated for a moment, trying to find her words. “And I didn’t really want to listen to you. But it doesn’t mean that I wanted you to just leave! Don’t be stupid.”
“But being stupid is sort of my schtick.”
Thankfully, that garnered a small smile.
“I’ve noticed. And, uh, I hope that you don’t mind that I borrowed it last night.”
“Bit of an understatement, but I don’t mind. Just don’t go stealing it.” I looked at Davis’ cell, feeling the itch you’d get when someone’s been staring at you. But I was confident that Davis hadn’t moved so much as to itch his ass in the last few hours, so that was reassuring.
“Thanks for not saying anything about me.”
“About your little fever? Of course I wouldn’t say anything, I’m not that much of an idiot.”
“I appreciate it, anyway.”
“Then it’s my pleasure.”
“Gross.” She said, shoulder checking me lightly. “You know… I didn’t want to just quarantine Davis today. I really wanted to put myself in one of those cells too.”
“You just have a fever.”
“I’m not fighting with you right now. What’s done is done, and obviously, I didn’t go in there too. What I’m trying to say is that this is just as much for me as it is for him.”
“It’s not like that Eury, trust me, this thing is a lot worse than just a fever.”
“But it starts with one, doesn’t it?”
“So does the flu! So does half the shit you can get from forgetting to wash your hands.”
“Still, it is a symptom. And you and I both know violence is one of them too.”
“Defending yourself doesn’t make you violent.”
“But I’ve wanted to be. The bridge, the moment I saw Davis at the clinic, I thought about it then. Then again when I saw that cut on his back. Hell, I even wanted to end that little conversation last night early.”
“I appreciate you walking away then.”
“Best part about a gun is that it works from a distance.” She said with a slightly unsettling smile.
“That’s not funny.”
“Who said I was joking?” She said, as her expression softened.
“You seem fine now though.”
“I feel fine now. Ish. I feel fine-ish. Sleep did me good. Last night was a little too long for me, I think. ”
“Same here. I’m glad to hear you’re feeling better though.”
“Yeah, me too. But I still can’t get it out of my head.”
“Maybe that’s it. You just convinced yourself that you’re sick with this thing, and now you can’t stop thinking about it.” I wanted to say that maybe those pills could help fight a nocebo with a placebo. But knowing about it would only ruin the whole thing. “Maybe you just need to ignore it? Let those pills do their job?”
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Eury muttered a quiet, “I guess,” before looking at me. “Can I tell you something stupid?”
“I thought I told you not to keep stealing my schtick?”
Another small smile. Another light shoulder check. “Seriously though. Do you promise not to say anything?”
“Who am I gonna tell?”
“No, I mean, promise that you’re not gonna try and convince me or try and make me feel better or whatever you always try and do?”
“I can try.”
“You want to know why I didn’t just go in there too?” She said nodding towards the cells. “I think when it came time to say that I might be sick as well, I couldn’t stand the idea of actually putting myself in there. If I did, then this would be real. And nothing you or anyone would change that.” Eury’s breathing picked up ever so slightly. Flashes of O’Brian’s played in my head, of how she was just before she passed out. “So I guess that just makes me a chicken. Or worse.”
“Well I , for one, am glad you didn’t. It would’ve just made shit worse. Why would you feed that dark thought in your mind? Just sit here and wait. I promise that it’ll be alright. I’m here to help you work through whatever you gotta.”
After chewing on her lip for a moment, she spoke. “I thought you promised not to say anything.”
I smiled, “I said that I’d try. It’s in the fine print.”
I half expected another shoulder check, but this time, she rested it against me instead.
I think she fell asleep sometime later.
I tried my best not to move, but it wasn’t long until Alaska came to relieve me. Seeing the two of us like that, a goofy smile crossed Alaska’s lips.
“Good night, huh?”
May 23, 2019 - 8:36 AM
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May 23, 2019 - O2 Remaining: 80.4 Hours / 3.35 Days - 7:03 PM
Eury Morrissey
The rest of the “night” after talking with Kelly was a blur. Enough so that when Alaska shook me awake, I didn’t realize I had somehow ended up back in a bunk room.
“Hey, wake up and start getting ready. It’s almost sundown. We want to head out the moment it’s dark.” Alaska then shook someone on the bunk above me. “Come help me get some ammo and supplies.”
“Wha?” It was Boyde. His voice was still a little bleary from his deep sleep, it seemed. In a panic, Kelly sat up in his bed. All the shuffling around in the dark must have set him off.
“Is everything okay?” He was trying to calm his breathing.
“Yeah, it’s almost time to go,” Alaska said, walking towards the door.
Kelly looked at me, then carefully spoke. “And you’re alright with that?”
“Of course,” I said. We needed to be careful of Boyde. It might’ve been a bit dangerous to say too much. “If Davis is good to go, all we need to do is keep an eye on him.” And me. “That being said, I think those meds did the trick.”
“I’m glad to hear it.” Kelly said with a smile. Boyde shuffled out of the bunkroom, running his hands through his hair left it as a series of sharp tendrils. Kelly laughed. “I should probably wash up first.”
“Sure. I’ll head out and get things ready.”
“Sounds good.”
In the main room of the station, on a table at the center, several small different coloured boxes and two walkie-talkies were spread out while Alaska, holding a small flashlight in her mouth, was taking apart and cleaning her shotgun.
“D’you think these can pick up transmissions from CB radios?” I said, grabbing one of the walkie-talkies. “My dad probably has his CB hooked up. I wouldn’t be surprised if he was trying to reach out to the military or whoever might be listening.”
“I reckon these ones are old enough. With a bit of tweaking, we could scan through the civilian bands. I think their range is like a couple miles maybe? We’d need to be a lot closer to get ahold of him. I don’t know. Boyde or Davis would probably be better suited to figuring that out though. Damn things are cursed for—” A small crash and a grunt from Boyde interrupted Alaska. “Hold that thought.” She jogged over to the hallway behind her.
While Alaska handled that, I walked over to the cart and uncovered the LOX tank. I switched out the E-tank I was using for the smaller D-tank, and let the larger one fill. The gauge on the LOX told me I had less than a third left. Not great, but between what was left in there, my O2 tanks and the condenser, I had just a little over three days remaining. More than enough to get out of town, to my parent’s place, and then some.
And if we could get that radio working and let my parents know we were coming, then all the better. Hell, maybe he could even drive out to meet us. Between that good news and the fact I was absolutely right about the infected, I was smiling.
After our argument last night, I knew that I said some pretty bad shit—the exhaustion and fever saw to that—but Kelly was out of line too. On the other hand, later on he did help walk me back from the edge.
Then I guess it was all a wash.
Then again, with Davis not being infected, and the fact that I didn’t go bonkers overnight were another two strikes against me.
Honestly, I could just ignore those.
There was another small crash, then Alaska and Boyde came into the hall with a small crate each.
“—I know what I saw! I’m not an idiot.” I heard Boyde before I saw him.
“You and I both know that’s not true.”
The two of them put the plastic crates down on the floor.
“What’s going on?” I asked.
“Boyde thinks that there’s one of them following us,” Alaska said as she resumed tending to her shotgun.
“She is! I saw her out there!” Boyde grabbed the sidesaddle for the shotgun and started filling it with shells. “I swear to God she’s out there somewhere ain’t she no boogeyman either.”
“They are attracted to sound. Maybe that’s why she’s following you guys.” I said, starting to fill my other E-tank from the LOX.
“Thank you, Eury. That’s what I said too.” Alaska said.
“It’s not like that. I saw her when we went into that coffee shop, she was there again when we left, then at the clinic, and then again just now.” Boyde turned to face me, “did you see any others stick around after a couple of days?”
“One did.”
“See! It ain’t so special.” Alaska said.
“It was her own house though,” I added.
“C’mon Eury, I thought you were on my side,” Alaska said with a chuckle.
“See, okay! Look, that’s what I’m talking about. This chick was there outside of the coffee shop, then I saw her again outside the clinic too!” Boyde was getting excited about being validated.
“Well if she was at the clinic chances are she ain’t walking around now. Not unless she was with that last group.” Alaska said.
“That’s my point. She was there a few minutes after everything started going to shit. Then I saw her run off.”
“Run off?” Alaska stopped cleaning the shotgun and looked up.
“Right? That’s weird right?” Boyde was starting to get more emphatic as his point was finally coming to the surface.
“I saw one like that too.” I said, “it was just before we got to the clinic actually. It was this guy, he was super skinny, and tall, but he was quick. Quicker than the others around here. I thought he must’ve gotten sick pretty recently or something.”
“Yeah! That’s what I mean. Get this, this chick seemed quick too! Do you think that they’re connected? Like had you guys seen this guy before?”
“I haven’t but Kelly recognized him. Someone named Teddy I guess?” He didn’t look like anyone I knew, and really, disfigured by all the sickness, I barely even recognized him as fully human, let alone someone I knew from before.
“Teddy?” Alaska muttered under her breath. After a second of thinking, she continued, “Boyde, what’s this girl look like?”
“She’s skinny too. White. Maybe five-five? Five-six? Blonde with dark roots.” He said rattling off her features in a way that seemed like he had done it a hundred times before. “I’d say she looked a bit like a tweaker but that would be important only if most people out there didn’t share the look these days.”
“I know them.” Alaska looked like she had seen a ghost. “I know those two. And what did you say that your friend’s name was? Kelly right? Do you know if his first name’s Leo?”
“First name?” For a moment I felt like an idiot. I never really even asked what his first name was. Really, I think that in my mind he was just Kelly. “I don’t know.”
“Well, if it is then this is all starting to make some sort of sense. You said that he called the tall lanky one Teddy right? Well I’ve had Teddy Johanssen locked up a few times for possession. Most of the time, a chick named Wren Shaw—who’s description matches Boyde’s girl—came to bail him out. And wouldn’t you know it, the few times that both of them end up in the tank? Well, that’s when a Leo Kelly showed up to bail them both out.”
Wren Shaw? Why did that name sound so familiar? There was the flicker recognition in my mind. But the remnants of the fever, and the sleepless nights clouded my memory.
“No shit…” Boyde said, “I thought that I recognized her.”
“Well, you should’ve seen her enough times on intake that you should've been best friends,” Alaska said without looking up from her work.
“So now the question is, why is your friend Kelly hanging out with two of the most down and out of the down and outs in Sheridan?” Boyde’s tone quickly shifted to something more akin to an interrogation. Alaska’s hands stopped as her raptor-like eyes flicked to me.
“Kelly’s a leader at NA.” Even though I answered with a hint of conviction, under the harsh scrutinizing glare of Alaska, it felt more like I was lying to my parents. Alaska’s eyes scraped up and down my face while she chewed the thought.
“Maybe Wren’s got something against us since you’re in that uniform.” Alaska offered, looking away from me.
“I guess that makes sense,” I said, “but why are they both so aggressive? Teddy looked like he had been infected like yesterday.”
“He wasn’t.” I hadn’t seen Kelly arrive, but from the dark hallway leading towards the bunkrooms he spoke. “Teddy and Wren were both sick leading up to all this crap, they were at O’Brian’s that night, and they were more than infected then.”
“Wait that was them at O’Brian’s?” As Alaska asked another realization was clear on her face. “Where you were… Was that you?”
Kelly nodded while staying silent. His expression, grew more passive as the moments passed.
“Well don’t just stand there! What the fuck happened? You kick all this shit off then what? Then just fuck off back into the dark doing enough damage to—”
“Alaska!” I couldn’t help but interrupt her. It wasn’t like I knew the whole story, but I knew Kelly well enough to know that he wouldn’t just—
“Yep, you got it. It’s me and mine who are responsible for this. Now if you don’t mind I’m gonna go and let Davis out. Assuming I didn’t get him killed too.”
“Kelly wait!” Kelly stopped before going into the cell room, but he didn’t turn around. “It’s not—”
“Do you just want me to go too? It is pretty fucking dangerous having me hang around here.” Kelly kept staring down the dark hall leading to the cells.
I jogged over to him, winding myself in the process, and dragged him into a side office. “That was some rude shit she said back there, but you don’t need to go. I know that she’s full of shit. She doesn’t know you and just—”
“But she’s not wrong.” As he spoke, his lips mashed together, only producing a slight smile after a second.
“No! She’s just being stupid. I know the truth.”
“How? You don’t know what happened. You weren’t there.”
“I know that you wouldn’t do anything like that on purpose! Whatever happened I know that. That’s not who you are.”
Where’s that coming from? Suddenly you’re miss trusting?
“But I did do it on purpose! You know what my only thought was when the two of them were chasing me?” Kelly’s painted on smile held firm as he spoke. “Where are there people? Where’s it gonna be busiest? Is that what you thought huh? And that’s the truth.”
“You were scared. After what happened this week, I know how you were feeling. You were just scared.”
“And being the coward I am, I ran off and fucked over everyone else. Real fucking hero I am. Standup guy and all that.”
“I know what you’re going through. I do. I get it…” Kelly’s tear-filled eyes met mine before I continued. “Okay, I don’t get it. It’s beyond fucking brutal what happened, but when you told me that you were going to help me I trusted you.”
Did you though? Not all of you that’s for sure. Not even most of you, just the sad little part of you that still has hope.
I took a deep breath to calm myself. “I can’t believe that I’m saying this, but I trust you. I do. Whatever you did before, whoever your friends were, whatever your past was, it doesn’t matter now. I know that you didn’t do anything on purpose. And I know that you’re just as much of a victim in all this as everyone else. More-so even. Alaska is just a fucking block head sometimes and speaks before she thinks, I’ll set her straight. I promise. I trusted you back at O’Brian’s, now it’s your turn to trust me.”
I held a hand out for him. It felt so stupid, so cheesy, and I just couldn’t get why people did it on shows and in movies. But, after a moment, when he grabbed my hand and squeezed it tightly, I realized why. It was at that moment that I knew that we needed to stick together. We’re both fucked right the hell up, but maybe that’s our way forward. Two messed up people helping each other navigate towards something else.
“Thank you.”
May 23, 2019 - O2 Remaining: 79.47 Hours / 3.31 Days - 8:12 PM